Teach-in Ghazal

[UnderYourSpell]

Sorry. I was writing it and kicking myself at the same time.

Move along readers. Nothing else to see here.

Sounds to me like you're all ready to move on

 

[champagne1982]

Sorry. I was writing it and kicking myself at the same time.

Move along readers. Nothing else to see here.

Oh come on... Didn't I once throw one of these out as a gunfight non-sub? Well, maybe not, but I did do that pantoumy thing for one (which I lost to the 'zed of the Tee).

 

[Angeline]

it's a damned good fix! links well with the 'still's, the hard I of 'time' links with 'light' and 'eyes' and i had no idea i'd used 'still' three times! oops. let's pretend that was quite deliberate, shall we, and not mention it to anyone else?

thankyou!

Brothers in arms


I look across the hills past all the beers gone by
the setting sun sits softened by the years gone by

And through the outward calm my skin still chills and bumps
a judder of the heart recalling cheers gone by

My lonely courage shivers, but it's just the light
that's bleeding from the land still seeping fears gone by

My eyes, ill used by time, drink shadows' cool refrain
the landscape's stained blood-red with all the tears gone by

Beneath the sleeping mounds and ghosting poppy fields
the distant drums still rumble for my peers gone by

May they find peace beyond the living's hot torment
of living yet: brothers in arms - my dears - gone by

Ta.

Sounds to me like you're all ready to move on

YES!

Oh come on... Didn't I once throw one of these out as a gunfight non-sub? Well, maybe not, but I did do that pantoumy thing for one (which I lost to the 'zed of the Tee).

Shit. I knew it.

 

[Ashesh9]

I read that poets will add their name in the last verse of a ghazal?

they do slip in their name not only in the last but in the middle too like
Mai kidhar jaoyuu , kuch toh bol ai Zafar ?

here Zafar Illahabadi the poet is being questioned by his own Mind , as to where he should go .

 

[Angeline]

they do slip in their name not only in the last but in the middle too like
Mai kidhar jaoyuu , kuch toh bol ai Zafar ?

here Zafar Illahabadi the poet is being questioned by his own Mind , as to where he should go .

Now that you mention it, I remember seeing that Hafiz did that a lot. It seemed a way of making the poem a more personal statement to me.

 

[butters]

Now that you mention it, I remember seeing that Hafiz did that a lot. It seemed a way of making the poem a more personal statement to me.

early form of copyright?

 

[Angeline]

early form of copyright?

From what little I know of Hafiz I will say no.

If yes and you had to put your own name in every poem, I would need to take up painting!

 

[champagne1982]

From what little I know of Hafiz I will say no.

If yes and you had to put your own name in every poem, I would need to take up painting!

Then you have to put your name on every painting.

 

[Angeline]

Then you have to put your name on every painting.

Yes but I could put it on the side where it doesn't show. I could bury it in a poem too, I suppose, but not Angeline. Only so many angels can fit on the head of my poems.

 

[runningonblade]

House Sitting For Another Lynn

I started watching a sex film starring Amber Lynn
And another hot blond babe named Ginger Lynn.

That was before I heard a loud noise coming
From the apartment of my good neighbor Lynn.

After I opened the door, I looked around the
Entire apartment and kept on calling for Lynn.

That was before I found her naked on the bed
With her finger in her pussy and thought, "Poor Lynn."

But that was before she opened her eyes and
Told me that she was house sitting for another Lynn.

The original had gone out of town on a business
Trip and gave a key to her identical twin sister Lynn.

 

[twelveoone]

I started watching a sex film starring Amber Lynn
And another hot blond babe named Ginger Lynn.

That was before I heard a loud noise coming
From the apartment of my good neighbor Lynn.

After I opened the door, I looked around the
Entire apartment and kept on calling for Lynn.

That was before I found her naked on the bed
With her finger in her pussy and thought, "Poor Lynn."

But that was before she opened her eyes and
Told me that she was house sitting for another Lynn.

The original had gone out of town on a business
Trip and gave a key to her identical twin sister Lynn.

outside of a little fudging on the rhyme, this has to be the best goddamn guzzle I've ever seen. Bad taste is timeless!