Teenaged boy learns he was kidnapped as a child - by googling his name

[shereads]

Top hit: I submitted a story to Literotica

You write pornography?

 

[shereads]

My real name gets a professorship in Portugal, naked videos, an artist, a Brazilian singer, and a folklore legend.

Perdita

Which ones are you?

I know you're not Brazilian, and you can't be a real legend and a folklore one at the same time. That leaves naked videos, artist and professorship in Portugal.


Very impressive resume, Perdita.

 

[Guest]

The videos were a way of paying for college. I was an awful actress but I won a special trophy for best enunciation.

Perdita

 

[shereads]

The videos were a way of paying for college. I was an awful actress but I won a special trophy for best enunciation.

Perdita

Love your avatar, by the way, and its caption.

He's amazing, isn't he?

 

[Guest]

He's amazing, isn't he?

Sorry, ella, I barely recall him.

Perdita

 

[shereads]

Sorry, ella, I barely recall him.

Perdita

You slut! (resounding, overly theatrical face-slap)

 

[Madame Manga]

Well, that's fucked my chances of getting back into the straight world! (Most employers Google people nowadays as a quick background check).

Anyway, I don't give a shit anymore: I refuse to work for anyone who looks down on Literotica. So there (tosses bowler hat into the Thames)

I always worry about things like that, but usually at too late a point to make any difference whatsoever. However, simple Googling of my name turns up only a little easily deniable evidence of my long career posting erotica on Usenet. It's mixed in with lottery winners, Girl Scout honors ceremonials and someone sending out virus warnings.

As you say, someone who can't muster a sense of humor about dirty stories wouldn't be a whole lot of fun to work for, but as it stands I could get a job as a Baptist church secretary if all they used was Google. If I really wanted to check out a prospective employee, I'd use a pay service that did a little more comprehensive background snooping, such as rooting through his credit card purchases, criminal record and registrations at snuff-porn sites.

MM

 

[SadieRose]

Golly Gosh!

I'm the star of a series of Christian adventure stories for children by Hilda Stahl!

*scary*

 

[SadieRose]

....also, someone's dead dog on an obituary site for dogs that used to be alive and now aren't.

Which was rather sad *reaches for the tissues*

 

[damppanties]

Re: Re: Re: Teenaged boy learns he was kidnapped as a child - by googling his name

damp, your AV makes me want to give you a biscuit and beep your nose. So cute.

woof, woof.

 

[damppanties]

....also, someone's dead dog on an obituary site for dogs that used to be alive and now aren't.

Which was rather sad *reaches for the tissues*

woof, woof, too?

 

[NoJo]

I always worry about things like that, but usually at too late a point to make any difference whatsoever. However, simple Googling of my name turns up only a little easily deniable evidence of my long career posting erotica on Usenet. It's mixed in with lottery winners, Girl Scout honors ceremonials and someone sending out virus warnings.

I worked in a very computer-literate white-collar environment.
When I posted on Lit under my real name, I didn't really think the consequences through. But I'm really glad I burned bridges, or at least singed them: I really did make a big career-change as a result. My most recent resume (as a wannabe writer) mentions my erotic scribbling, rather than buries it.

I'm proud to have submitted popular stories here; I'm glad I can actually boast about it nowadays.

 

[shereads]

As you say, someone who can't muster a sense of humor about dirty stories wouldn't be a whole lot of fun to work for, but as it stands I could get a job as a Baptist church secretary if all they used was Google. If I really wanted to check out a prospective employee, I'd use a pay service that did a little more comprehensive background snooping, such as rooting through his credit card purchases, criminal record and registrations at snuff-porn sites.

That's good to hear, Madame M. My rates are better than competitive, and I can use the additional business. I have the dirt on pretty much everybody here; I've been spying on Lit writers since June for the Justice Department so I have a head start.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I don't get people who are into snuff flicks or necrophilia. I mean, it's hard enough to get the right response out of a live lover..?

 

[Guest]

... I'm proud to have submitted popular stories here; I'm glad I can actually boast about it nowadays.

Good on you, Joe. I'm glad and cheering for you.

your fan, Perdita

 

[destinie21]

The videos were a way of paying for college. I was an awful actress but I won a special trophy for best enunciation.

Perdita

did you enunciate with your mouth full

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I thought enunciuchs were uninterested in sex..?

(This damned hair-bleaching has a weird affect on my jokes.)