The Fight is Half the Pleasure

[hungdavid]

Oh yes, THIS. Can't quite get this picture out of my head.

Don't worry baby doll... I'll take care of you...

 

[sereneone4u]

Oh no. I want it hot and sweaty. Slippery and sliding against each other. Squeezing. grasping, breathing heavily. Feeling her sliding against me. Her skin on me and mine on hers. Who ever wins taking the other like the animals we are. Hard, fast and deep as possible.

Damn and now I have to go to bed. (G)

Mike

Oh damn...only he wins or he is not getting it,lol.

 

[Babyslave]

Don't worry baby doll... I'll take care of you...

Nice to know I can count on you coming thru for me.

 

[hungdavid]

Nice to know I can count on you coming thru for me.

You can lean on me...

Just tell me what you need, baby doll...

 

[SGrey]

I enjoy this thread so much

 

[Babyslave]

You can lean on me...

Just tell me what you need, baby doll...

Hmmm. What do I need, or what do I want? Completely different answers, you know. What I want is to be on a couch with someone, maybe watching a movie, start a little horseplay, kick that up a notch or two, and before you know it, there's some full contact wrestling going on in the middle of the living room floor. Legs, arms, all tangled up while someone tries to gain the upper hand..... A bit of writhing, a little bucking of the hips and before you know it? We're hot, naked and doin' nasty things that will scare the neighbors!

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Yum! I really am enjoying the posts here! So many perspectives that have made me pause and reconsider a lot. I have really been pondering this idea that putting up a physical fight in this way can be seen by some as a gesture of defiance toward the dominant partner. Clearly for some this can be very true and welcomed by both parties, I see nothing wrong with it at all if it works for the people doing it.

That said, for me I don't think that this attraction to physical struggle/fight is about a competition or an actual exchange of power occurring right then. I would need to feel surrendered AND would need to know that he WANTS the struggle for me to actually enjoy it. I guess it is probably better described as a feigned resistance vs. a fight as I want to and will strain and struggle to the limits of my body's capacity, but in the end I would expect to be claimed and for it to please him immensely. I am proud of my physical strength, and thus would assume that "putting up a good fight" would be pride swelling for me and for him. The idea that like my devotion and attention, my physical strength and best effort are gifts I am giving in that act that are definitely a significant part of my motivations and desires.

I wonder if it can also just be about actually feeling the energy of the power expressed and made physically tangible that, at least in part, drives this particular craving. Raslin' can be a yumtastic primal brain/body chemistry square dance for both parties to experience. That said, I also wonder if this physical craving is more common with people who tend to be more feelers in the way that they experience the world. By that I think I mean that someone who just "knows" about the established powerplay dynamic and is fulfilled and content in the "knowing" of it would not be compelled or attracted to the physical play or manifestation of it. They just don't need or desire to "feel" it as they just "know" it and it satiates them. I love this idea and think this is a beautiful thing. I think for me I would have to know the control is there and held appropriately to be content as well, but feeling it in this physical way is also hot, delicious, and indulgent fun.

 

[Noira]

I think you've been reading most of the posts wrong. So far most of them have been subs (pyl) that have been talking about trying their best (some of them knowing they cannot win) to beat their PYL.

So only female identified sadist you ain't.

Exactly! It's a sea of people who want to not be able to win! D: I'm sure there are other people out there who are female (and I specify that because all of the PYL types who'd posted before me were all "I'm going to use my manly muscles and she can never beat me") who want to win the fight.

Right?

I'm just trying to goad them out.

And I see a couple have responded, so I am glad to know that I'm not the only female in existence who doesn't want to be beaten and forced to submit. I feel like BDSM is annoyingly gender-restricted a lot of the time when I pop into posts and I was feeling bitchy back there because it was all "he'll win and I will submit like I should" and "manly muscle flexflex". Which is hot, but y'know. Don't mind me, I just can't bring myself to post "I love this particular kink" alone when all the posts above me are from adorable subs who want to be made to surrender.

That said, I also wonder if this physical craving is more common with people who tend to be more feelers in the way that they experience the world. By that I think I mean that someone who just "knows" about the established powerplay dynamic and is fulfilled and content in the "knowing" of it would not be compelled or attracted to the physical play or manifestation of it. They just don't need or desire to "feel" it as they just "know" it and it satiates them. I love this idea and think this is a beautiful thing.

I think that may be a thing, yes. I'm already a very physical person and so I wouldn't be content just knowing someone's happily submitting to being topped.

Winning is the other half of the pleasure. Claiming someone's submission, holding them down, a little bit of gloating...

I found your post most excellent and thought-provoking.

 

[YourCaptor]

A struggle is cute, resistance like when I want to rape her is fun, but fight? I think I would just shut her down and let her stew on it a bit. Fighting is not hot, I always have to role my eyes when guys boast about scratch marks on their backs.

 

[YourCaptor]

The only problem is... I would want to win. None of this "let you win" bullshit. My unattainable life's goal is to be able to beat the shit out of a man who's definitely fighting back.

As hot as a good fight is, if it's not on balanced terms I'm going to be irritated as hell because I have no chance to win and I just don't get off on 1) knowing I can't win or 2) being let win. So I suppose as a top I'm limited to playing other games. D:

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only female-identified sadist here, in amidst the sea of "oh yes, knowing I cannot win is most of the turn-on!" posts. Damn right I want the fighting, kicking, bruising, struggling, pain... but when it comes to the outcome I want to have earned the top, or have put up a damn good fight to not get it. None of this cannot win, futile fight, omfg he's so strong and I'm shooooo weak, and definitely no "my sub let me win". (I would dearly love a petite female sub with a sense of smartassery and the urge to get in a fight. From the other side of the scale, knowing that she couldn't win would be fucking hot. Making her submit would be even hotter.)

I'm itching to learn a few martial arts. My kink right now is me being able to fight.

Use a taser. Even the biggest man will be on his knees, begging.

 

[PrettyProse]

I would dearly love a petite female sub with a sense of smartassery and the urge to get in a fight. From the other side of the scale, knowing that she couldn't win would be fucking hot. Making her submit would be even hotter.

I've never been dominated by a female before, but ^THAT^ made me flush and imagine...stuff. Now I'm frustrated.

I usually put up a damned good fight and submit only when I know I cannot possibly win the fight. Sometimes I pick the fights. Sometimes I get close to winning but I'm not very strong and so I kinda fight dirty and this frustrates the hell out of my partners so they get really stern with me. I definitely don't mind that, though. I don't put up a struggle all the time, but when there's a playful atmosphere that evolves like any pillow fight does and gets out of control....I'm all for that.

 

[brokentoy2011]

Such a yummy thread

I enjoy resisting. There is nothing in the world like knowing you are giving it your all and so is your partner. I would be insulted or hurt by someone just surrendering during a 'fight'. I don't surrender until I have absolutely no options left. By then I am so wound up and horny that every sensation is erotic. To be defeated in a fair fight, knowing that the other person could force you to do something, and yet knowing you trust them is absolutely the most secure place I can imagine. They want you enough to fight for you, with you.

Certainly there is a time for everything and sometimes a quiet stress-free love-making is in order. But for me, personally, bring it on. I have a whole bag of tricks. Winner take all...

 

[unknooown]

A few years back when we were in college, my wife -- before she was my wife or even my girlfriend -- naively said that she thought she would be able to get away if somebody decided to mug, attack, or rape her. She's barely 5'3" and I can't imagine that she's ever been more than 105 pounds.

Later that night after everyone left my room I asked her if she really thought that or if she was trying to be tough. She confirmed that she really believed it, so I jumped on her, took her to the ground, pulled her pants down to her knees, and pinned her there. The whole thing took no more than 90 seconds.

I'm wondering if showing her that actually did any good in terms of her being more alert when walking around alone. That was my intention but yeah I tossed off pretty well that night too.

 

[unknooown]

Also yes I like when she resists. We have a consensual non-consent thing going, and when she doesn't want it she just lays still so I finish up quickly and we can be on our way.

When she does want it she puts up a fight like you wouldn't believe. I love this woman.

 

[kiwi_submissive]

I just can't fight or even put up token resistance. Someone usually ends up getting hurt and not in a good way. I hate being so clumsy.

 

[unknooown]

A little writhing goes a long way

 

[txblush]

I am loving the comments in this thread, giving me new perspectives...

Me too.

 

[Hislittlesub]

Subscribing!!

xxxxxx

 

[Licia]

The only problem is... I would want to win. None of this "let you win" bullshit. My unattainable life's goal is to be able to beat the shit out of a man who's definitely fighting back.

As hot as a good fight is, if it's not on balanced terms I'm going to be irritated as hell because I have no chance to win and I just don't get off on 1) knowing I can't win or 2) being let win. So I suppose as a top I'm limited to playing other games. D:

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only female-identified sadist here, in amidst the sea of "oh yes, knowing I cannot win is most of the turn-on!" posts. Damn right I want the fighting, kicking, bruising, struggling, pain... but when it comes to the outcome I want to have earned the top, or have put up a damn good fight to not get it. None of this cannot win, futile fight, omfg he's so strong and I'm shooooo weak, and definitely no "my sub let me win". (I would dearly love a petite female sub with a sense of smartassery and the urge to get in a fight. From the other side of the scale, knowing that she couldn't win would be fucking hot. Making her submit would be even hotter.)

I'm itching to learn a few martial arts. My kink right now is me being able to fight.

Karate. Tae Kwon Do. Ju jitsu for the win!

The latter of the three giving the advantage to the "bottom", it makes for a living sex-toy. Rearranging the dining room table is fun for me.

I've been contemplating kick boxing next. Our strength is in our legs, yanno.

What's funny is that not long after the adult match, hubby brought our 17-month-old son into the bedroom, plopped him on the bed, and my infant then kicked my ass with a head-butt to the nerve center located on the side of my left leg, above the knee. All the cool points I'd earned, gone in an instant!

 

[Licia]

Use a taser. Even the biggest man will be on his knees, begging.

As will a heel kick to the testicles or a heel stomp to the foot. Then they politely lean their face forward (or sideways), cover their puppies, and holler. A child pull it off. Luckily, that's only fun for me if I'm defending my body or someone else who is "incapable" of defending themself.

Wrestling's just good, clean fun.

 

[where]

I love a good scrap. Give him lip so he has to catch and punish me. bliss.

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[karamitchell]

Wow this is by far the most provocative thread I've read here. I feel so much better knowing I'm not the only one that gets turned on by this. Oh bother, now I'm all worked up again.

 

[CandiCame]

Gya- my man won't fight me- and I KNOW he could beat the shit out of me- I think he just has to wait and open up some more- he doesn't want to really hurt me. He greatly underestimates how tough I am...

Gotta find a way to get him into the "no" means "yes" stuff. He's a bit more like some of the doms who said they get annoyed by resistance. But I would LOVE this; it's always been one of my fantasies.