The Isolated Blurt Thread XXXVII: You're Welcome, Fuckers

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I entered a CBC short story contest an hour before the deadline today. I wasn't going to but first prize is two weeks at a writer's retreat in Banff and I could certainly use a vacation.
 
How do you tell a woman she has nose hair and not get screamed at?
Very carefully. 🙃
That one's easy. You tell her she has a nose hair sticking out and you would rather say something than let her go out in public with it. Then you look like a concerned friend rather than an asshole. Don't say she has nose "hairs" she'll figure that out herself. Pisses me off if I leave the house with spinach on my teeth and nobody says anything.
Or go the 'did you see so and so? She has all kinds of nose hairs' route and hope she checks hers for hair.
 
Very carefully. 🙃
That one's easy. You tell her she has a nose hair sticking out and you would rather say something than let her go out in public with it. Then you look like a concerned friend rather than an asshole. Don't say she has nose "hairs" she'll figure that out herself. Pisses me off if I leave the house with spinach on my teeth and nobody says anything.
Or go the 'did you see so and so? She has all kinds of nose hairs' route and hope she checks hers for hair.
Hmmmmm ill have to find the right time
 
just saw a design for a mug that was really nice... it has a 3-D design on it that appears as a row of shelves filled with books (3 different designs available!!!) behind a broken-through wall and the discounts could 'disappear at any time!!!'

i thought it was cute enough to take a look but there's no way i'm spending this on it... what a freakin' rip-off! that's just obscene, even at the discounted price. It's just a mug with a 3-D transfer when all's said and done. ffs.

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