The most awkward or funny thing that happened during sex.....

[mikado2005]

My newlywed wife and I were visiting the in-laws one weekend and we were given her old bedroom with two twin beds to sleep in. The next morning Mr. Happy needed some attention. I climbed on top of her and started to push inside of her. I was several strokes into her when her ancient siamese cat, who we didn't know was in the room, climbed up on my back and settled into nap mode. I looked down at her and said, Duke has just climbed up on my back for a nap." She broke out laughing shooting me out of her. I broke out laughing too. Needless to say, we were done being amorous for the morning. My mother-in-law still gets a big kick out of the story.

 

[Sylvia2]

One of many...

Years ago, boyfriend and I booked ourselves into a lovely country house hotel for a romantic night. We were looking forward to a delicious meal in the restaurant, but once we got into the hotel room to get ready we couldn't resist making the most of the huge sunken jacuzzi bath and sumptuous surroundings.

This led to some intense fucking which culminated in him fucking me missionary position in the last hard thrusts, pulling out to cum on my breasts. However, he over reached his target (accidentally?) and hit me in the face... including my eyes. My eyeballs were burning. We finished getting dressed and I had to sit through a romantic meal with sore, red eyes, (but looking otherwise gorgeous, obviously).

I still don't know if this is a natural reaction, or if I'm allergic or something. Anyway, I've avoided the full facial experience since then.

 

[lex8508]

ok not a true sex story thanks to me being a virgin but I do have one really funny time.. I tend to take forever to get off for some reason up to three hours if I get interupted and one day the dog kept scratching at my door and my cat kept wanting in and out and all the while I was dreaming of some faceless gorgeous woman with an amazing body, long dark hair and big beautiful blue eyes and just at the point of release as all my muscles were squeezing trying for a hopefully better orgasm than usual, and dreaming of this beauty urging me on, I just stareted to let loose and two things happened at once, the first jet shot up over my extremely long torso (Im 6'7+ with only a 30 inch leg inseam) and hit my left ear and the wall behind me above my shoulder, and at the exzact same time I let out a MAJOR Barney from the Simpson burp and just seriously lost it after my 15 second burp and I still never figured out where the rest of my "seed" disapeared to, never found the wet spot on my bed.. my luck it was all over the shoulder of my shirt and I didnt know it as I walked out of my room to talk with my parents like 10 minutes later with red eyes and now a serious case of the hicups..

 

[crash197177]

just started dating this woman. She didn't tell me that she took meds to help her sleep. Nor did she inform me that she had just taked her dose before getting into bed. We start fooling around and in the middle of going down on her I hear her start snoring. Had I known this I would have gone for a quickie. The next morning I told her what had happen and she was so embarrased. We dated for three years and I never let her live that down.

 

[gothic_nymph]

Probably my MIL walking into our house and coming right into the bedroom.

Oh Geez!! This happened to me too!! We were going at it on the bed, me kneeling, him pounding me from behind... pulling my hair and spanking me... All the sudden the bedroom door opened and there was his mother!!!!