The Wedding Ring
- Thread starter Ravin the Poet
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silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
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[peers at EJ]
have you been hanging out w/ joe pesci again? tsk, tsk...
ed
have you been hanging out w/ joe pesci again? tsk, tsk...
ed
kiwichyck
Really Experienced
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- Dec 24, 2005
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I have been married four years and we were engaged for about 7 years before that. I still don't own a diamond engagement ring. At some stage I would love a diamond ring, but it would be just that - a diamond ring, not an engagement ring.
DH never got me one because of finances and the complete insanity of spending craploads of money on a diamond when we had stuff like rent to pay. We got together young, talked vaguely about marriage 'one day' moved in together and had a couple of kids. Still no ring. One year on valentines he brought me a 9ct gold filigree pretty little heart shaped ring. I said "great, an engagement ring!" and that was that.
Maybe I'm just not materialistic. Maybe I'm just not sentimental. I just never saw the point of spending heaps of money on something for my finger. I would be petrified of losing it. I mean, whats with rings that cost more than your car? I've also heard many women complain they can't wear their diamonds as often as they'd like because they are just impractical for daily wear. I can and mostly do wear my rings all the time. I have my little filigree ring and a plain gold wedding band with an engraved pattern on the top. They were relatively cheap, probably around $100 US for the both of them. Its the sentiment, not the size or the money involved.
I'm in this marriage for the love, not for the money and 'things'
DH never got me one because of finances and the complete insanity of spending craploads of money on a diamond when we had stuff like rent to pay. We got together young, talked vaguely about marriage 'one day' moved in together and had a couple of kids. Still no ring. One year on valentines he brought me a 9ct gold filigree pretty little heart shaped ring. I said "great, an engagement ring!" and that was that.
Maybe I'm just not materialistic. Maybe I'm just not sentimental. I just never saw the point of spending heaps of money on something for my finger. I would be petrified of losing it. I mean, whats with rings that cost more than your car? I've also heard many women complain they can't wear their diamonds as often as they'd like because they are just impractical for daily wear. I can and mostly do wear my rings all the time. I have my little filigree ring and a plain gold wedding band with an engraved pattern on the top. They were relatively cheap, probably around $100 US for the both of them. Its the sentiment, not the size or the money involved.
I'm in this marriage for the love, not for the money and 'things'
onlyerics
Really Experienced
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If I were to get engaged, I wouldn't really want a very expensive ring that would cost thousands of dollars...I'd be scared (insurance or no) to wear it because I might lose it. But that doesn't mean that I wouldn't want a ring either. I'd rather have one yet it doesn't have to cost a whole lot. I've never been an extravagant person anyway.
Does a person have to have a ring to be engaged? It depends on the couple. Having a ring just makes it more official.
SaraClarisse mentioned that having a ring also determines your status. I agree with that. The more expensive it looks...the person is going to think that the woman will be very well-provided for by the man. As long as the guy can afford an expensive ring, no problem! But then it would be really stupid if the guy goes flat out broke and won't have any money left to support the girl.
Clearly, the meaning behind the engagement ring (a symbolic promise of eternal love) would matter much more.
Does a person have to have a ring to be engaged? It depends on the couple. Having a ring just makes it more official.
SaraClarisse mentioned that having a ring also determines your status. I agree with that. The more expensive it looks...the person is going to think that the woman will be very well-provided for by the man. As long as the guy can afford an expensive ring, no problem! But then it would be really stupid if the guy goes flat out broke and won't have any money left to support the girl.
Clearly, the meaning behind the engagement ring (a symbolic promise of eternal love) would matter much more.
wicked woman
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I'd have to be planning on getting married to be concerned about a wedding ring. Which I'm not, but....
Was engaged and married too young and still in school so too poor to have the option of going the expensive diamond ring thing.
The first engagement wasn't a diamond...just a nice ring he selected. Got a lot of comments of disbelief from people that it could be an engagement ring, because it wasn't a diamond.
Second engagement was just four months before the wedding and since we were both in school and more worried about rent and food and paying for school books...we agreed I'd wear my grandmother's solitare diamond engagement ring as mine. Added a plain wide yellow gold wedding band to it...and I was more than happy. So was he.
As an aside...still waiting for some woman to be honest and post that there's not way she's marrying someone without a big honking expensive diamond engagement ring first. If he can't afford that, she's not marrying him!
Was engaged and married too young and still in school so too poor to have the option of going the expensive diamond ring thing.
The first engagement wasn't a diamond...just a nice ring he selected. Got a lot of comments of disbelief from people that it could be an engagement ring, because it wasn't a diamond.
Second engagement was just four months before the wedding and since we were both in school and more worried about rent and food and paying for school books...we agreed I'd wear my grandmother's solitare diamond engagement ring as mine. Added a plain wide yellow gold wedding band to it...and I was more than happy. So was he.
As an aside...still waiting for some woman to be honest and post that there's not way she's marrying someone without a big honking expensive diamond engagement ring first. If he can't afford that, she's not marrying him!
Norajane
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wicked woman said:As an aside...still waiting for some woman to be honest and post that there's not way she's marrying someone without a big honking expensive diamond engagement ring first. If he can't afford that, she's not marrying him!
No way I'm gonna marry someone without...
Ok, no, that's not true at all. I don't wear extravagant jewelry, and I certainly wouldn't expect a big honking expensive ring from someone who couldn't even afford a small one.
BUT, the converse is true. I would expect a nice ring from someone who can afford it, especially if he spends a lot on his own toys (electronics, cars, vacations, etc.). If he can spend $2-3k on a high end laptop or a trip to Hawaii, but doesn't want to spend that much on the woman he wants to be his forever, it would raise some concerns about how we view money and how to spend it.
Especially since I can afford it for myself. And I would be more than willing to pay for half of it.
I would rather have a nice ring than an expensive wedding.
Norajane
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Eilan said:Exactly. I've seen the madness that goes into wedding planning. When I got married for the first time all I cared about was the big white dress (even though there was no way in hell that I "deserved" it
Heh, heh. All brides have to wear white so as not to scare the in-laws. Just imagine walking down the aisle wearing scarlet!
BiBunny
Moon Queen & Wanderer
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My mother always told me that if a man didn't love me enough to come up with the money for at least a one-carat diamond ring, there was no sense in me marrying him.
It sounds good in theory, but, in practice, it might be a little different.
It sounds good in theory, but, in practice, it might be a little different.
Norajane
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BiBunny said:My mother always told me that if a man didn't love me enough to come up with the money for at least a one-carat diamond ring, there was no sense in me marrying him.
It sounds good in theory, but, in practice, it might be a little different.
If he likes when you play with his jewels, he should at least buy you some of your own.
wicked woman
from my travels
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Norajane said:
Actually I used to threaten to wear red to my first wedding
midwestyankee
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Since brides have been wearing white as a mere symbol for generations, I always thought that the reason the tradition of white gowns was kept as proof that the bride knows how to eat without spilling food all over herself.Norajane said:
wicked woman
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midwestyankee said:Since brides have been wearing white as a mere symbol for generations, I always thought that the reason the tradition of white gowns was kept as proof that the bride knows how to eat without spilling food all over herself.
Don't go there Yank...my dil had a 'bib' made of the same material as her wedding dress! She loves ketchup...did the job!
midwestyankee
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I had no idea my toes would taste this good.wicked woman said:
wicked woman
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midwestyankee said:I had no idea my toes would taste this good.
No babe that would be if she was my daughter!
SweetErika
Fingers Crossed
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I told my hubby early on that I'd love to just have my grandma's engagment and wedding rings re-sized because they're more unique than anything you see today and are very special to me. He said he wouldn't stand for not buying me a ring.
When the time came, we chose a $600 US platinum, .26 carat, excellent quality Canadian diamond on a pre-Christmas trip to Canada. It was well within our budget, is still unique, and I absolutely love it. Honestly though, I would still have loved to use my grandma's or other very inexpensive rings, and I'd be just as happy with a lab-created diamond (or other stone) as a real one. I don't think I'd have been too thrilled with a very expensive ring because that money has been put to better use and I get irritated with materialism.
I DO prefer quality, but that can mean anything from a nicer diamond to time, effort, or sentiment. A very thin white gold ring that he took a lot of time to choose and a meaningful proposal is worth more than a diamond in platinum to me.
I did, and would want a ring for the symbolism between us and to others, but it doesn't matter what it is as long as it's affordable and lasts.
Oh, and I have seen women on here who felt 1+ carats were very reasonable and REQUIRED.
When the time came, we chose a $600 US platinum, .26 carat, excellent quality Canadian diamond on a pre-Christmas trip to Canada. It was well within our budget, is still unique, and I absolutely love it. Honestly though, I would still have loved to use my grandma's or other very inexpensive rings, and I'd be just as happy with a lab-created diamond (or other stone) as a real one. I don't think I'd have been too thrilled with a very expensive ring because that money has been put to better use and I get irritated with materialism.
I DO prefer quality, but that can mean anything from a nicer diamond to time, effort, or sentiment. A very thin white gold ring that he took a lot of time to choose and a meaningful proposal is worth more than a diamond in platinum to me.
I did, and would want a ring for the symbolism between us and to others, but it doesn't matter what it is as long as it's affordable and lasts.
Oh, and I have seen women on here who felt 1+ carats were very reasonable and REQUIRED.
Eilan
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I'd love to see a pic, because I'm nosy that way.SweetErika said:
Size queens.Oh, and I have seen women on here who felt 1+ carats were very reasonable and REQUIRED.
FWIW, the mother's ring that my hubby bought me last Mother's Day means every bit as much to me as my engagement/wedding rings.
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phoenix1224
Sexy Beast
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Screw diamonds!
The diamond industry is probably the biggest scam in the world... And there are several reasons why I would not buy diamonds (except unless they are small accent stones on the band)...
1) The diamond industry has deceived the world into believing that diamonds are rare when, in actuality, there are vaults all over the world filled with diamonds that are deliberately kept off the market in order to artificially inflate the price.
2) Those that mine the diamonds do so under slave labor conditions... Making only dollars a day, with very few (if any) breaks, under extremely dangerous conditions... There are hundreds of diamond miner deaths every year.
3) Diamonds are the prefered currency of terrorists... So, that diamond you're wearing on your finger is most likely covered in blood.
I say go for a sapphire, ruby, or emerald... They're actually MORE rare than diamonds, more reasonable in price, and (in my opinion) prettier in appearance.
The diamond industry is probably the biggest scam in the world... And there are several reasons why I would not buy diamonds (except unless they are small accent stones on the band)...
1) The diamond industry has deceived the world into believing that diamonds are rare when, in actuality, there are vaults all over the world filled with diamonds that are deliberately kept off the market in order to artificially inflate the price.
2) Those that mine the diamonds do so under slave labor conditions... Making only dollars a day, with very few (if any) breaks, under extremely dangerous conditions... There are hundreds of diamond miner deaths every year.
3) Diamonds are the prefered currency of terrorists... So, that diamond you're wearing on your finger is most likely covered in blood.
I say go for a sapphire, ruby, or emerald... They're actually MORE rare than diamonds, more reasonable in price, and (in my opinion) prettier in appearance.
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silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
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it's also the preferred currency of criminals, since both groups value the non-traceability of diamonds as well as high value/mass ratio. let's not overstate the case.
that said: i think a good diamond is very pretty.
ed
phoenix1224
Sexy Beast
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Bah... I think diamonds are too plain.silverwhisper said:
