Things That Make You Uncomfortable....But Also Turn You On

Yes, I think that is a common reason for using it, when there is reasoning behind it.
It is just that putting collective goals ahead of your individual goals and not sticking out or trying to get ahead of others is just as much a part of the stereotype, in my opinion.

We tend to forget that the sterotype and the sexism is not just male, but just as often internalized and turned against ourselves and others.

Personally, I think that if ”patriarchy” is going to be useful, we need to see it as something we are all a part of and/or something that is a part of all of us.
I couldn't agree more - especially with the difference between the pursuit of the good of an individual as opposed to the good of the collective. Especially when the collective is not necessarily one we get a choice in belonging to.

But from what I remember of philosophy classes, even a maxim like "Maximise Welfare!" proves not to be good to follow in all cases. I'm sure.

And yes to the patriarchy being immanent.
 
Part of my issue is I haven't had sex in a long, long time. Not just sex. I haven't held hands, felt a hand on my ass, been looked at lewdly. This has been due to a long-term caregiving situation with my late husband - I guess I wanted to be clear about that for some reason. We had a D/s, actively kinky relationship. And then we didn't. (See? Stag is spot on.)

I'm slowly coming out of my no-sex, no-intimacy shell. I didn't want it for a while. Now that my lady parts (and my brain) seem to be coming around, suddenly, the thought of being with someone - NAKED - and hopefully trussed up in some insane fashion - has my brain zipping around in crazy, anxiety producing places.

I imagine when it actually does happen, I truly won't be too worried about whether or not my ass looks fat or my tummy jiggles in odd ways. Fingers crossed, right?

Purple Rain! I say we collectively watch it and see what happens. Report back. For scientific purposes.
There are parts of this I feel so deeply.

I haven't had sex, held hands, been touched, kissed in more years than I care to think about, but needless to say it's been double digit years. A broken kink heart, broken trust, physical issues, health issues, weight issues, deep depression, a cold marriage.

I didn't want anything to do with intimacy or sex. But this year, it's started coming back, in a really big way. But there's this feeling of having lost something, some part of myself... I call it fuckability. I don't feel fuckable. I don't feel desirable and it's more than just physical, it's emotional, mental. Lit has helped some. I can get in better physical health, I can change the shape and size of my body, but fixing the emotional and mental side of things... That's harder.
And until the first couple of times, I think I'll worry about the physical, too. I see some of the women who post pictures here on Lit and the comparisonitis takes over... And I begin to hide all of me again. I'm not thin, I'm not young, my tits hang low, etc...
Of course, get me a blindfold, some rope, a gag, and take off your belt... I may not care that even I don't measure up in my own head.

I think I lost where I was going with this, but getting this out, in some form of anonymity, helps me to see it all in black and white. It's both scary and maybe a little freeing.
 
This is going to sound so weird and I’m almost embarrassed to admit it but one time I was with this rough redneck guy and he hadn’t showered and smelled kinda bad and god help me for some reason that really got me going right then haha
 
There are parts of this I feel so deeply.

I haven't had sex, held hands, been touched, kissed in more years than I care to think about, but needless to say it's been double digit years. A broken kink heart, broken trust, physical issues, health issues, weight issues, deep depression, a cold marriage.

I didn't want anything to do with intimacy or sex. But this year, it's started coming back, in a really big way. But there's this feeling of having lost something, some part of myself... I call it fuckability. I don't feel fuckable. I don't feel desirable and it's more than just physical, it's emotional, mental. Lit has helped some. I can get in better physical health, I can change the shape and size of my body, but fixing the emotional and mental side of things... That's harder.
And until the first couple of times, I think I'll worry about the physical, too. I see some of the women who post pictures here on Lit and the comparisonitis takes over... And I begin to hide all of me again. I'm not thin, I'm not young, my tits hang low, etc...
Of course, get me a blindfold, some rope, a gag, and take off your belt... I may not care that even I don't measure up in my own head.

I think I lost where I was going with this, but getting this out, in some form of anonymity, helps me to see it all in black and white. It's both scary and maybe a little freeing.
I had the same in my marriage and took me forever to get my confidence back.

Turned to running to give me focus and as I got fit and felt sexy about myself, others started to see me in a sexy way.

I went in a sexual journey after that and it felt amazing, some was just sex others was emotional or some just very close friends to the point of having an attachment like I've never experienced.

Keeping on topic, what I did learn on my journey was being turned on by touch in a very slight but subtle way in inappropriate situations.
 
So I had to Google what a pick me girl is. And laughed when I realized how popular the term is and how out of the loop I am. But then all the thoughts…if I admit that to anyone does that make me a pick me girl?! Can pick me girls be self aware? Does considering myself self aware put me squarely back in camp pick me?! Then I started giggling because the whole thing is ridiculous.

So thanks for that overthinking spiral, PLP 😝

And overthinking takes me out of pick me girl status, right? 🔄 😂

Haha I'm sorry to have caused this total spiral. And while a Pick Me girl has a bit of a negative connotation, here it's meant as the opposite. I don't think of you as a PMG at all however that doesn't keep me from being uncomfortable attracted to you 😋

*snickers*

I had to google that too, btw. 🙄

:D
 
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I want to be her on the camera...although the caption might be a little different...
 
For years I have had a strong exhibionist and CFNM interest. My late wife and I had many discussions about this and she wanted to know all my fantasies. She did her best to make many of my fantasies come true. She knew just how far to push me and when to pull me back. The most uncomfortable time was when she told me she had shared my interests with an aunt and with our youngest daughter.
She told me our daughter said "oh mom, that is so normal."
 
I don't like to judge people who are into the "Daddy" thing- if that is their kink then it's fine.

It is obviously not my kink; the reason being, I would prefer to seek a lover, not a surrogate daughter. But perhaps, if I was submissive by nature and female and was seeking a father figure as well as a lover, I would feel differently. Or if I had more dominant tendencies. Oddly, though, being submissive and male, even though I like the idea of a dominant female, the idea of her being a surrogate mom doesn't really do it for me either. Again, I hope I'm not coming across as judgemental here.
 
After 30 years of marriage and with me having serious health issues she's finally fulfilled my cuckold fantasy. Intercourse between us hasn't happened in months and won't be happening anytime soon.
What scares me and turns me on is the closeness between them.
 
I’m fairly quiet during sex, my wife is loud and talks dirty. She will get me to talk dirty but even after 29 years it still makes me uncomfortable but it can be a turn on at the same time.
 
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