Trust

[MissTaken]

Tanning butter?


Would you apply mine, please Sir?


Oh and ya might have to tie me down , I squirm.






BTW....joking doesn't mean I agree with you, but I know you are a hell of a lot of fun

 

[Ebonyfire]

I keep forgetting

Tanning butter?


Would you apply mine, please Sir?


Oh and ya might have to tie me down , I squirm.






BTW....joking doesn't mean I agree with you, but I know you are a hell of a lot of fun

I accidently fed the troll. But since I am a Domme, I can get away with it! lol

Eb <it will never happend again>

 

[MissTaken]

Re: I keep forgetting

I accidently fed the troll. But since I am a Domme, I can get away with it! lol

Eb <it will never happend again>

Darlin'

You are forgiven.

And since being Domme has so many privileges, I am tempted to switch!

 

[lilredwolph]

i'm just going sit in the back seat like a good little subbie and peak in lance's toy bag

shhh don't tell on me or i'll get punished

oh wait go ahead and tattle theres some neat toys in this bag

 

[monster666]

The troll makes zero points, just stirrs more shit

Why the hell should people who are purely disruptive not be run out on a rail? The people who put this together put it together with the idea that people with like minds about kink could come and talk and be reasonable with one another. They don't owe anyone else anything, not so much as the time of day. They have a right to assemble peacefully. By and large, they welcomed everyone with open arms.

I grow weary of people spouting that tired old "free speech" lecture, like it's their 2nd amendment right to say whatever they want, wherever they want. That's clueless bullshit. If you don't think so, try arguing with a Judge (who is sworn to uphold the law) in a courtroom, and see where it gets you. And getting your feelings hurt because a mod did their job is petty and juvenile. Get a clue.

This isn't a school for every asshole that thinks he/she has a right to be here, it's a community of similarly minded people. People that do trust the leadership here, and want to learn from one another and share experiences and laughs. If you can't get along and be supportive of it's existing member's - including the leadership, then stop trolling and move the fuck along. You really don't belong here, and you aren't helping anything a damn bit, but I suspect you already know that. You seem more content to sling shit in your spineless, anonymous manner than to contribute anything positive.

I have been quiet on this topic for days because I really don't have anything new to add other than my voice, but I can't stand it anymore.

Sam, you are 100% on target in my book.

But when you learn to think for yourself. You may not always agree with other here on this board. When you disagree with someone here, you should not be treated like you don’t belong here, or be ousted by the community you help evolved to what it is today. We are here to Learn, teach or understand about Bd/Sm. Not be belittled by others for the way we think, or what we do. Trust has a big part in it but I don’t trust everyone I meet. TRUST should be earned! Because in Bd/Sm you are putting you life in others hands, or have some one else’s life in your hands.

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: The troll makes zero points, just stirrs more shit

Why the hell should people who are purely disruptive not be run out on a rail? The people who put this together put it together with the idea that people with like minds about kink could come and talk and be reasonable with one another. They don't owe anyone else anything, not so much as the time of day. They have a right to assemble peacefully. By and large, they welcomed everyone with open arms.

I grow weary of people spouting that tired old "free speech" lecture, like it's their 2nd amendment right to say whatever they want, wherever they want. That's clueless bullshit. If you don't think so, try arguing with a Judge (who is sworn to uphold the law) in a courtroom, and see where it gets you. And getting your feelings hurt because a mod did their job is petty and juvenile. Get a clue.

This isn't a school for every asshole that thinks he/she has a right to be here, it's a community of similarly minded people. People that do trust the leadership here, and want to learn from one another and share experiences and laughs. If you can't get along and be supportive of it's existing member's - including the leadership, then stop trolling and move the fuck along. You really don't belong here, and you aren't helping anything a damn bit, but I suspect you already know that. You seem more content to sling shit in your spineless, anonymous manner than to contribute anything positive.

I have been quiet on this topic for days because I really don't have anything new to add other than my voice, but I can't stand it anymore.

Sam, you are 100% on target in my book.

Right on, Monster.

The troll is a gutless coward who has no agenda beyond creating bad feelings here out of personal pique. If he or she had a reasonable argument, they would stand by it.
The idea that they need to be afraid to put their name to their opinions is pathetic. What's cym going to do, come to their house and beat them up?

This board has been a great blessing to me and I take these attempts to disrupt it very personally.

 

[Lancecastor]

Trolling.....

....though something I don't practise...(I'm more of a lurker, myself)...is not always a bad thing...or the "bad" thing.

I find the rude, unwelcoming "If you don't like it, fuck off to somewhere else." school of thought far more troubling, far more "bad". It's just always in poor taste.

There's an undertone of judgemental elitism in some of the comments here sometimes...and I've seen it before. It's not right to be so cloistered...BDSM is a topic that, by its very nature, calls for some open-ness beyond the knee-jerk bird-flipping that goes on here sometimes.

Praise and protect the Mods' work, yes. They keep the place pretty tidy and seem quite wise to me...for what THAT's worth.

But please also consider that those who criticize from a distance under Troll cover...might...might... be making some....some... good points, sometimes.

In any event, it wouldn't harm anyone or anything to encourage as opposed to shutting down discussion.

Now....where's that body butter gone?!

Lance "I'd Rather Be Naked" Castor

 

[CarolineOh]

That's an awfully presumptious post, Lance.

The point is not "if you don't like it, fuck off" the point is, if you are not happy here, why try to ruin it for everyone?

 

[monster666]

Re: Trolling.....

Lance,

I fail to see how wanting to exist peacefully as a community is elitist. It's just a matter of self-preservation. Questions and ideas that people present honestly pertaining to BDSM (and even some that weren't) are welcomed for the most part. But don't all members (including mods) have the same right to have dessenting opinions when those ideas are raised without being accused of being elitist or judgemental? I have seen far more judgement coming from the critics here than from the mods or any of the long standing members.

And as far as allowing deliberate disruption in the guise of free speech and open-ness, that's just silly. And it's not what our second amendment here in the states protects. It doesn't work anywhere, except maybe in the British parliament, and even there, it's benefit is suspect at best.

And notice that although we don't agree, we can have a civil conversation about our differences. This has nothing to do with and has little resemblence to the pure bullshit that has been going on here, and is a perfect example of what this could and should be.

But if someone really doesn't like what's here, then I am glad if they find it rude and unwelcoming. And I hope they do fuck off (move on), because they won't contribute anything positive, and maybe we can exist here in peace another day.

IMHO it's far more rude to stay and criticize something you don't care for that others have put their sweat into than it is to suggest to people that they should move along and find a place more suited to their liking if they feel they don't like what's on the plate.

[BI find the rude, unwelcoming "If you don't like it, fuck off to somewhere else." school of thought far more troubling, far more "bad". It's just always in poor taste.

There's an undertone of judgemental elitism in some of the comments here sometimes...and I've seen it before. It's not right to be so cloistered...BDSM is a topic that, by its very nature, calls for some open-ness beyond the knee-jerk bird-flipping that goes on here sometimes.
Lance "I'd Rather Be Naked" Castor [/B]

 

[MissTaken]

Diverse opinions are cool.

But, the name calling needs to stop.


That is just my "I am exhausted and dont' give a shit what people think of me" opinion.

 

[monster666]

It's never going to stop as long as flagrant disruptiveness is tolerated, and uncontrolled, the namecalling will continue to proliferate. Expecting everyone to act like reasonable, mature adults is evidently asking far too much of some.

Whether some like it or not, the only thing that is going to keep this forum from turning out to be GBII is good moderating, which I think we have. I'd like to see them left to do their jobs and allowed to be opinionated members as well.

Diverse opinions are cool.

But, the name calling needs to stop.


That is just my "I am exhausted and dont' give a shit what people think of me" opinion.

 

[CarolineOh]

Diverse opinions are cool.

But, the name calling needs to stop.


That is just my "I am exhausted and dont' give a shit what people think of me" opinion.

You are right, and I am sorry that I am having some trouble with my temper.

But I am hurting from what these people are trying to do to this forum. Such a fine thing vandalized out of spite and pique, or worse, just for the fun of shit stirring.

 

[morninggirl5]

You are right, and I am sorry that I am having some trouble with my temper.

But I am hurting from what these people are trying to do to this forum. Such a fine thing vandalized out of spite and pique, or worse, just for the fun of shit stirring.

Caroline, you just described exactly how i felt when i saw this mess when i logged in this afternoon. I felt personally violated. I honestly felt like the one and only place i have that i can be me, all the pieces of me was being torn apart. And for what, because somebody wants to be petty and childish and doesn't have the courage to speak out with their own name.

I've had a chance to calm down a bit, but there's no reason for this shit to continue. If someone has a problem with someone here, take it to pm's. If it doesn't get solved there, it's not going to be solved so drop it and move on or leave.

Noone is forcing anyone to stay here. If you're not happy, then you need to find someplace that will make you happy. This isn't the place for everyone.

 

[CarolineOh]

Unfortunately, MG, what usually happens is that the complainers stay and the people who come in friendship and sincerity leave out of the feelings you so ably described.
I don't want to see that happen, and so I have edited out some very angry comments I just posted in that other thread. I've made my feelings clear, and now I hope we can get back to the helpful, supportive discussion that has made this such a valuable place.

 

[cellis]

All I can say

I am heartsick about all of this...

I feel violated and abused. This was a haven for me... something that I needed in my life... the support and friendship.

This is probably not a good time for me to post as there are other things going on in my life right now that are very upsetting and this shit just upsets me even more.

 

[morninggirl5]

Cellis, i know exactly how you feel.

Part of the reason i'm feeling better is i just got back from a date. It was our second date and earlier today when we were im'ing, i was so upset and when he asked why, i sent him the link to the "other" thread.



Uh, guys, my i-thought-he-was-nilla date isn't nilla at all.

 

[MzChrista]

Unfortunately, MG, what usually happens is that the complainers stay and the people who come in friendship and sincerity leave out of the feelings you so ably described.
I don't want to see that happen, and so I have edited out some very angry comments I just posted in that other thread. I've made my feelings clear, and now I hope we can get back to the helpful, supportive discussion that has made this such a valuable place.

Honey, go get yourself some of that hot chocolate sam lovin and youll feel better in the morning.
Every board goes through shit like this sometimes, Itll be cool in the long run.

 

[WillowPuss]

Uh, guys, my i-thought-he-was-nilla date isn't nilla at all.

Ohhhh now that sounds promising mg5 .... any details you would care to share?

I am happy for you.
(((hugs)))

 

[DRxBlue]

Thank you, Sam

This has been a opportunity for a number of people to prove what really sweet people they are. You folks from the Motown are ROCKIN' especially!

The MAIN reason i'm posting is to say that i agree with the lovely Willow. MG5 you CAN'T just leave us hanging like this. Can you?

Have you shown sadistic tendencies in the past?

pouting, yet puppy eyed,
Blue

 

[morninggirl5]

Sorry, all, i didn't mean to leave you hanging.

Here's the up to the minute, full report.

We had dinner on Wed. night, had a really good time. Since then we've im'd each other a couple of times. I got really scared on Thursday afternoon, i was already upset, so my usual "oh my god, what am i thinking here" came out. We discussed it yesterday and i thought everything was okay.

Here's the BUT -- he was supposed to call last night and so far, no phone call.

If there are any updates, you all will be among the first to know.

 

[WillowPuss]

Here's the BUT -- he was supposed to call last night and so far, no phone call.

If there are any updates, you all will be among the first to know.

awwwwwww mg5 ... keeping fingers crossed for you.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Me too!

awwwwwww mg5 ... keeping fingers crossed for you.

Am crossing fingers, toes and eyes for good measure!

Ebony

 

[DRxBlue]

Ooof!

Don't you hate modern "courting"?

There are no traditions or conventions any more. Little of the ritual, the dance that has always been more interesting than most sex.

Tougher still when a chance remark puts you in the "Goldfish Bowl" limelight.

Still, i think we were all wondering about what he said or did to indicate that he "isn't 'nilla at all." That's what perked my ears up.

Now..where were we?

Blue

 

[morninggirl5]

Re: Ooof!

Don't you hate modern "courting"?

There are no traditions or conventions any more. Little of the ritual, the dance that has always been more interesting than most sex.

Tougher still when a chance remark puts you in the "Goldfish Bowl" limelight.

Still, i think we were all wondering about what he said or did to indicate that he "isn't 'nilla at all." That's what perked my ears up.

Now..where were we?

Blue

DrxBlue, he simply asked me how long i had been interested in D/s and then told me he was an experienced Dom.


Since this thread is titled trust, i'll try to get back on topic a bit. Yes, this modern "courting" is hard. I'm constantly analyzing what we're saying. Learning to trust someone is very hard for me, it definitely doesn't happen overnight. And if that fragile trust is tested, it breaks very easily.

Perhaps because of all the broken promises in my life as a child, honesty and following through with what someone promises me is the most important thing to me in any relationship.

 

[DRxBlue]

*Applause* That was sweet--and subtle

Yes! You very neatly steered us back to the course this thread was set on. Your answer to the question complete, yet understated. Thank you.

It IS nice to find a place like this where we can often let down our masks and unbuckle the armor RL makes compulsory.

Then (with luck) we can talk about; secret desires, feelings we think we might want to act upon, trying to define what directions we'd like to explore and finding out if anyone else has been there.

i think we're quite justified in trying to protect our small haven. Those of us who've explored the web a lot know that a rare and wonderful group has collected here. They continue to come.

By concentrating on the sharing of joys, fears, experience and laughter, we can try to keep the spirit of this forum alive.

Blue