What are the traits of a redneck?

[babydoll2u]

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

*checks elbows and knees*

PHEW!!!! Nope, mine are pink!

LOL.. had to check mine too.....

 

[Quoll]

Arkansas State Residence Application



Name: ________________ (_) Billy-Bob

.................. (last)
................................... (_) Billy-Joe

................................... (_) Billy-Ray

................................... (_) Billy-Sue

................................... (_) Billy-Mae

................................... (_) Billy-Jack

(Check appropriate box)



Age: ____

Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ N/A

Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right



Occupation:

(_)Farmer

(_)Mechanic

(_)Hair Dresser

(_)Unemployed



Spouse's Name: __________________________



Relationship with spouse:

(_) Sister

(_) Brother

(_) Aunt

(_) Uncle

(_) Cousin

(_) Mother

(_) Father

(_) Son

(_) Daughter

(_) Pet



Number of children living in household: ___



Number that are yours: ___



Mother's Name: _______________________



Father's Name: _______________________ (If not sure, leave blank)



Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)



Do you (_)own or (_)rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)



___ Total number of vehicles you own

___ Number of vehicles that still crank

___ Number of vehicles in front yard

___ Number of vehicles in back yard

___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks



Firearms you own and where you keep them:



____ truck

____ bedroom

____ bathroom

____ kitchen

____ shed



Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 194_



Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:

(_)The National Enquirer

(_)The Globe

(_)TV Guide

(_)Soap Opera Digest



___ Number of times you've seen a UFO

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis

___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO



How often do you bathe:

(_)Weekly

(_)Monthly

(_)Not Applicable



Color of teeth:

(_)Yellow

(_)Brownish-Yellow

(_)Brown

(_)Black

(_)N/A



Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:

(_)Red-Man



How far is your home from a paved road?

(_)1 mile

(_)2 miles

(_)don't know

 

[EJFan]

LMAO! good one quoll... again. it's like you have an endless supply. and we're happy for that.

i forgot to mention, in response to the original question, my three criteria for redneck identification... redencks have zero tolerance for, and no understanding of, the following:

1. non-whites
2. non-christians
3. non-heterosexuals

anyone meeting these three items is a redneck. period. there are rednecks who DON'T fit these criteria, but someone who does is.

 

[Guest]

 

[EJFan]

Gonna be redneck city again here this weekend; NASCAR races all weekend. Not that I think that all race fans are rednecks, but every redneck on the east coast will be here.

Wal-Mart parking lot will be full of campers by Friday. I have seen people sleeping in tents there on these race weekends (where do these people bathe?)

when i used to work in dover, de we had this too. as i've said in the past... some MANLY lookin' women at that shit.

i think you can get rich quick by setting up a booth to sell scanners at these events. i don't mean the flat-bed kind... i mean the ones you use to listen to the rednecks in the pit.

and to answer your question... they either don't bathe or they make out with whatever contraption they can assemble out of spare parts and garbage. i think i mentioned in this thread that these yahoos used to steal refrigerator boxes from our store's garbage dump to make outhouses. we used to count ourselves lucky when they'd have the courtesy to actually MOVE the boxes to another location before doing so.

 

[Guest]

 

[EJFan]

The scanner idea sounds like a good one. I've been trying to think of some way to capitalize on the situation, they spend a lot of money here. Unfortunately though, that would mean I would actually have to come in contact with them. Yikes!

yeah... it's a VERY scary prospect to even think of coming in contact with... THEM.

rednecks do spend a lot of money... it's been a huge windfall for the area around the track in dover which has been growing by leaps and bounds ever since they expanded the actual race track itself. redneck money spends just as well as any other kind.

if i had my druthers, however, i'd convince them to not spend so much of it on stupid shit and convert them to some decent tasting beer. fuckin' budweiser drinkin' douche bags.

and btw... money is one of the few things that separate rednecks from white trash. there aren't too many distinctions but this is a key one.

 

[Guest]

 

[EJFan]

The only way you'll get them to drink something other than budweiser is if you get a race car driver to endorse it.

that's the problem... i'd like these "people" to get some taste and standards.

 

[Guest]

 

[EJFan]

The worst part is, after the race and a 30-pack of bud, all 100,000 of them think they're jeff gordon or dale jr. on their way outta here.

at least yours leave... i have to live among many of them.

 

[Guest]

 

[Desperotico]

I find myself in the midst of them also. My wife's family hails from the "Down-Home" crowd and they are completely embarassing 99% of the time. But they do come in handy while watching NASCAR (I like it for the crashes)

 

[Guest]

 

[pleasteasme]

and my favorite: 1 potato chip truck homemade camper. .

Oh My.........Good Golly Willikers.....that be some FINE livin there!

 

[EJFan]

Oh My.........Good Golly Willikers.....that be some FINE livin there!

pfft. i gots me a doublewide tater-chip truck.

 

[pleasteasme]

pfft. i gots me a doublewide tater-chip truck.

*smiles big toothless grin*

 

[Eilan]

You think yer a redneck? Well, I went to high school with someone named Joe Bob.

 

[EJFan]

*smiles big toothless grin*

this reminds me... we used to joke that the sleazy strip bar joint in north dover boasted TOOTHLESS dancers (as opposed to topless).

 

[EJFan]

You think yer a redneck? Well, I went to high school with someone named Joe Bob.

my neighbor introducing his family to me at his recent reunion cookout:

i'd like you to meet, billy joe, bobbi sue, cletus james, billy bubba, joe bob, elly may, bobby joe, jo ellen, johnny buck, bucky todd, carl lee, mary lee, joella lee, mary kay... and my cousin from the north... kevin.

 

[pleasteasme]

this reminds me... we used to joke that the sleazy strip bar joint in north dover boasted TOOTHLESS dancers (as opposed to topless).

a-ha.....*puzzles* and that is sexy?????


*reconsiders keeping all my teeth in.....*

 

[pleasteasme]

my neighbor introducing his family to me at his recent reunion cookout:

i'd like you to meet, billy joe, bobbi sue, cletus james, billy bubba, joe bob, elly may, bobby joe, jo ellen, johnny buck, bucky todd, carl lee, mary lee, joella lee, mary kay... and my cousin from the north... kevin.

Ummmmm....my middle name....well, it is a total redneck middle name....let's just say if my first name was Peggy.....I would have a song about me


~Just HOW difficult is it to legally change your name?~

 

[Guest]

 

[jack_foley]

LMAO! good one quoll... again. it's like you have an endless supply. and we're happy for that.

i forgot to mention, in response to the original question, my three criteria for redneck identification... redencks have zero tolerance for, and no understanding of, the following:

1. non-whites
2. non-christians
3. non-heterosexuals

anyone meeting these three items is a redneck. period. there are rednecks who DON'T fit these criteria, but someone who does is.

so what your like the authority on rednecks and ignorance?
i believe it,cuzz friend, yours is showin.

i'll not argue your point that ALOT of redneck are intolorant towards those groups
but not all .i live in West"By God"Virginia and know alot of "rednecks". and some
of the are the kindest ,coolest people i have ever met.

they show everybody respect untill they are given a reason not to respect said people,regardless of race,religion or sexuallity.

and not every bigot is a "redneck" i know a lot of people who freely use words like
"nigger","faggot" and other equally ignorant words,and they come from California
New York,Mass. and other "civilized" areas of our great country.

the point is you are no diffirent than the stereo typical "redneck"judging based on
apperance and stereotypes rather than interactions.

 

[EJFan]

so what your like the authority on rednecks and ignorance?
i believe it,cuzz friend, yours is showin.

i'll not argue your point that ALOT of redneck are intolorant towards those groups
but not all .i live in West"By God"Virginia and know alot of "rednecks". and some
of the are the kindest ,coolest people i have ever met.

they show everybody respect untill they are given a reason not to respect said people,regardless of race,religion or sexuallity.

and not every bigot is a "redneck" i know a lot of people who freely use words like
"nigger","faggot" and other equally ignorant words,and they come from California
New York,Mass. and other "civilized" areas of our great country.

the point is you are no diffirent than the stereo typical "redneck"judging based on
apperance and stereotypes rather than interactions.

i think you missed the point. real rednecks DO judge and they judge from ignorance... the exactly point you make. so we can agree on that. we can also agree that rednecks are not a purely southern life form.

also, as i stated (though not completely enough so i'll correct it here), fitting those criteria does not a redneck make... however, rednecks DO fit that criteria. and, yes, i AM an expert (in as much as there can be one) because i've seen, heard and interacted with far too much of it.

i judge people... not on race, income, religion, color or any of the other typical factors... i judge the ignorant and stupid because they come in all forms, all colors, etc. i've often suggested that if you HAVE to detest a group, detest the stupid because at least there's some solid foundation there.