What is the perfect body?

[bailadora]

I've been away from Lit for a few days. Wow - some great posts here - thanks to everyone who has shared their thoughts.

The Male and Female form also has a "ratio" that is acceptable to the human eye. The correct ratio was a visual representation of health. In early civilizations health was very important of course.

Evolution has made us want certain things in the opposite sex. Marketing has taken these aspects and as with everything else bring it to the extreme. The more modern the society the more whacked the sense of beauty. There have been studies showing this. One note, although the modern societies have skewed the sense of beauty it is not as far off as we would think.

What beauty shows, magazines want us to believe is attractive to Modern Man is not what Modern Man is attracted too. Yes, we admire the beauty but in the back of our minds might be, less/more butt, less/more chest, better proportion, etc.

TigerClaw, interesting that you bring up evolution as this is exactly the same point my husband made when I told him I'd started this thread. I can see your point that certain attributes were equated with health, thus those individuals who had them were the best candidates to procreate with. But...I think the current "ideal" is more off kilter than we might think. I decided to do some research on the topic because I was curious if it was just my own sensitivity to certain things that might be coloring my perspective. Some food for thought:

The Association of Model Agents (AMA) says that female models should be around 34-24-34 inches (86-61-86 cm) and at least 5 ft 8 in (1.73 m) tall. Currently, the height required to do fashion shows has increased. During the last fashion shows in Europe, the average height was 1.79 m (5 ft 10 in), the average weight was 50 kg (110 lb), with bust between 85 to 90 cm (33.5 to 35.4 inches), waist under 62 cm (24.4 inches), and hips under 90 cm (35.4 inches), to fit the 34/36 size of haute Couture prototypes. Average dimensions for a male model are a height of 180-188 cm (5 ft 11 in- 6'2") and a weight of 64-75 kg (140-165 lb). Male models are also toned and fit. Organizers of a fashion show in Madrid in September 2006 turned away models who were judged to be underweight by medical personnel who were on hand. In February 2007, six months after her sister, Luisel Ramos, also a model, died, Uruguayan model Eliana Ramos became the third international model to die of malnutrition in six months (The second victim was Ana Carolina Reston). Luisel Ramos died of heart failure caused by anorexia nervosa. Source: Wikipedia

I did the math and if the above averages are true - then your average female model has a BMI of less than 18%, which is underweight by medical standards. How is this healthy when these women are literally dying to be thin? The men's statistics seemed to be more in line, but then I read the following:

Similarly, all boys see is a body ideal that for most men is impossible to achieve without illegal anabolic steroids. There is a physiological limit to how much muscle a man can attain naturally, given his height, frame, and body fat percentage. Unfortunately, however, the action figure heroes on toy store shelves and male fitness models on magazine covers and ads suggest otherwise. Source - Student Nutrition and Action Council at UCLA

I don't know - it's all a tangled mess. I realize and agree that we are all ultimately responsible for our personal health. OTOH: I also believe in corporate responsibility and I think the fashion industry and the associated media needs to acknowledge and correct their role in setting an unhealthy standard.

 

[bailadora]

Hmm...I'm finding it interesting to read through this thread. Unfortunately I know that appearances can become a very big deal if the people around you are crazy...to explain: I grew up being told by my Dad that I should start skipping breakfast. I think it started when I was 11 or 12. He was concerned I'd become a carbon-copy of my mom and went to the extreme of encouraging weight loss at a very early age. My Mom was constantly saying 'the only thing that matters is what's inside you' but then she contradicted such statements by being noticeably uncomfortable of her own body in public arenas.

When I was 13, still a size 2 and in the midst of a growth spurt, I did a research paper on bulemia b/c I wanted to know if I should be controlling my weight by throwing up. Luckily I was smart enough to reject that plan and tell my Dad to quit harping on it. What's really wrong about this is that I've never been overweight, not even close, and yet somehow the people closest to me were influenced enough by societal images of what is attractive to think a prepubescent girl needed to stop eating.

Most days I recognize the beauty of my own body, but every once and a while I get to feeling like that girl, thinking I should be a stick figure. This is the danger of creating an ideal that is not realistic for 90% of the population. Luckily I don't think this happens very often. But it did happen to me. And the main reason I didn't develop an eating disorder or suffer from low self-esteem is because I did my hw and then rejected the messages being sent my way. Not everyone is so lucky. I've subsequently taken good care of my body. And as far as I'm concerned as long as I can comfortably wear my clothing, feel healthy, and run 12 miles in a day life is good.

Last thing: it is not comfortable sharing this story, but I think it's important which is why it's here. Just saying... *grins* blast away

FF: Thank you for sharing your story. Kudos to you for being one smart cookie and having the wherewithal to do your homework and stand up for yourself. *bows respectfully*

When I first started this thread, it was a mostly academic question. The more I got to thinking about it - I realized that in a few years, I'm going to have one child just entering his teens and another on the threshold of hers. While my husband and I are doing our best to promote positive body images, I'm not so naive as to believe that we are going to be the only contributing factors. I hope that we will be the predominant one, but as you pointed out - not everyone is able to discern how distorted the media images are. I hope my son doesn't ever think he has to take steroids because the girls won't like him if he isn't Mr. Olympus. I hope my daughter doesn't ever think she needs to starve herself or become bulimic because the boys won't like her if she's not skinny like Kate Moss. I hope they will have your strength, FF and have the presence of mind to reject the lies.

 

[bailadora]

This may not be what the OP was looking for, but , in my opinion..........


The perfect body is the one that your partner wants to fall asleep next to each night and wake up next to each morning. Simple as that.

I like this. I'm going to print it and keep it on my vanity mirror.

 

[OnDisplay]

Check out my body:

 

[bailadora]

OD - singularly unhelpful. If you are that desperate for attention - take yourself over to AM pictures instead of spamming the boards.

 

[intruder52]

Interesting topic. Well I am a 55 year old male. I have had problems with my weight most of my life. Having said that I have also been in controll of my weight most of my life. But, in my forties I put on lots of weight. At 6 feet tall i weighed over 300 pounds.

In my late teens through my twenties and into my early thirties I spent between 10 and 15 hours per week in the gym and running. This kept my weight in check for all those years. I was powerful back then being able to lift weights two and three times my 210 pounds. Then the forties came, job pressures, kids, poor eating habits,not working out, I blew up like a balloon. About 4 years ago I got back to my roots in diet and excersize. Lost about 100 pounds, went from size 50 pants back to a more resonable 36.

All through those changes I never felt really bad about myself. Sure I was fat, so what. I still liked myself, after all there was more of me. The wife never complained, we had good sex.

But my attitude has changed. I like myself much better now. I look in the mirror and there is a man that most 20 somethings would not mind having the body of.

My wife also struggles with her weight and is a bit heavy, but I love her and never nag her to lose, she knows she has to and works at it all the time.

So yeah, I love well toned men and women be they thin or heavy. There are all kinds in the gym and what impresses me most is a positve attitude. Attitude is what is all about for me and I now believe it always has been.

But there is one pro body biulder at the gym I work out at that really turns me on. I just love his body. The women that come regularly are all firm even if they have different shapes.

 

[Cathleen]

I didn't read every post but something bluestreak said lends itself to my thoughts.

So what happens when the world suddenly stops seeing you as fat or unattractive, and begins to see you as smart, hard-working, and more attractive?

When the answer to that question is "nothing," then perhaps the question might be a purposeful question (not disrespecting bailadore at all). The perfect body does not exist and while bluestreak had a major life changing thru his physical body (and that's fantastic) there are a hell of a lot more people feeling less than, damaged, lazy, unattracted etc etc. because they don't measure up -- but to whom?

We are more than a body, so much more, yet our society awards the size 0. Who the hell is size 0? I used to think a size 0 would mean I was dead.

 

[shyrebel]

There is no such thing as a perfect body because everyone has thier own version of the perfect body.

 

[Noira]

I agree with most of the statements posted above. And completely disagree.

Yes. We have to start taking responsibility of our sedentary lifestyle. We no longer work in the fields 12 hours a day, and therefore cannot eat as if we do. We do have to watch out what we eat and how much we exercise. Undeniably.

However. The image portrayed in the Western world as the ideal body (and I am speaking from a woman's point of view - at least, from this one) is utterly disgusting, for the most part unattainable and let's face it, unhealthy. When a woman becomes obsessed with the 'perfect' measurements, the 'perfect' set of abs, the amount of calories she eats, the amount of hours she spends at the gym and forgets to live, all in the name of health, then it isn't, in my opinion, worth it. When she stresses whether or not about that cookie, then it's not healthy. It is possible to go into extreme 'health' and that is just as dangerous and damaging to the body as letting one go.

One of the reasons that curves was, for the longest time, considered to be desirable (and no, I am not speaking about obesity, I am taking about an actual wait, hips and breasts) was because it showed health, and a joie de vivre. Similarly, in Central and Eastern Europe, it doesn't really matter the shape of the body, but whether or not the person was healthy and enjoyed life. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what is the most important.

If a woman, or a man, regularly exercises, usually eats healthfully, but occasionally indulges and happens to carry a few pounds, then that to me is the perfect body, regardless of the few extra pounds. If I feel that the man I'm with, despite his chiseled abs, to-die for shoulders and phenomenal ass, is more concerned with the amount of time he puts in the gym and whether or not he went over his daily carbs allotment because he shared that pie with me than he is enjoying himself, I feel that he is less than desirable that the guy who has that little tummy but nonetheless will eat that eclair with me without any guilt. Yes, discipline is commendable. But there too much discipline, and when one cannot 'let go' once in awhile screams obsession and almost, I don't know, fear perhaps? For me, the perfect body is one that is healthy, and one that isn't afraid to live and enjoy life's pleasure, and let's face it, food is one of them.

Just my extremely long 0.02 cents.

(applause)

Thank you for essentially stating what I would have. Y'know what: I'm overweight. I don't care. Well, no, that's a lie. I've been bombarded by magazines all my life that tell me I need to look like this:

Tall.
Skinny.
Big breasts.
Shapely butt.
Muscular but not TOO muscular because those women are 'gross'.
Bikini wearing.
Showing it all off.
Tanned.
Makeup.

Blahblahblah.

I don't.

I admit I don't like my weight and I'm working at putting it off. I'm around 180 pounds and 5"2. According to everything else, I should be 110 pounds.

This is why I won't be: because I would hate myself that weight. I hate skinny girls. Not because I want to be like them, but because they're ugly. They obsess with their calories and their ribs show and they look nervous and they're terrified of indulging for fear of ruining their perfect look--their media perfect look. And in their minds, they're never pretty enough. (And sorry, guys, but honestly... skinny anime boys are such a turnoff. Ughhh. No surprise that my boyfriend's chubby too, and I love him for it.)

I want to be 135 pounds again. I liked that weight. I was on the small side of a medium, I've always been busty and curvy and I've always had a heavy bone structure. Skinnyskinny makes me look bad. And I'm confident at that weight. I'm confident at this weight. It's not looks that judge a person, but personality and how they carry it. At least, that's how it should be.

Some of the most 'perfect bodied' people I've met at the most disgusting to be around because they obsess over it. It's when you're confident with your body that you'll be your best. If you need a media body to be that way, great. If it just means you're healthy and a bit chubby, great. If you're skinny naturally, great!

I'm naturally busty. I'm also naturally chubby, naturally cheerful, and naturally adverse to makeup. And if a man won't accept me for it, then he doesn't deserve a glance at my boobs. I love myself for being an amitable albeit chunky girl with muscle build. Doesn't matter to me if I don't have a perfect body and wouldn't be a front page magazine gal for anything but 'Big is Beautiful'. And it doesn't matter to me that my guy wouldn't either. For me, it's alllll about additude. I hardly look at people now. It's how they act that's the real perfect body. Mmhmm. I'm not encouraging obesity, I'm all in favor of a healthy weight (and I know a good chunk of mine's muscle because I've weighed this much before and looked way bigger). What I would encourage is confidence. I think that's what wins most people over.

And I wish every woman had my additude: if a guy doesn't like you for whatever you are, he's likely not worth your time. Unless that's your kink. Eh. ^_^

 

[____open____]

The idea for this thread started with the discussion going on in aimouse's penis enlargement thread in the HT forum. Specifically :

• It made me wonder why we buy into the idea that bigger is better (whether it refers to a penis or a woman's breasts)?
• It also made me wonder why we seem to accept the westernized concept of the perfect body when only a very small percentage of the world's population fits this image.
• Why can't we reject this idealized version and love our bodies the way they are?

I think this is something we've all struggled with whether we are male or female and I would be very interested in your thoughts. Thanks!

I think the perfect body is the one where the mind within is happy and content...people that are to hung up on what's wrong with their body arn't nearly as sexy as those who are happy with their body. That's an idealistic statement as I'm currently sliming up a bit but I think it holds merit.

Cheers.

 

[PertPerth]

There is no such thing as a perfect body because everyone has thier own version of the perfect body.

Quoted for emphasis.

As far as I'm concerned there is no perfect body because we are human and not plastic dolls. We grow old, we get pimples, we get sun burn and wrinkles and our hair goes grey.

I'm small, slim and "attractive" and I hate people telling me "you're so skinny" or "so pretty". Why do people care or comment so much? Don't they care about what my personality is like? Do they care that I'm intelligent too? I have a degree with first class honours - I also built 1/2 of my house...yet all they can say is that I'm pretty.

Having said that, I'm happy in my skin and body - it's MY skin, MY body and it's not replaceable, so I look after it. I exercise every day, I watch what I eat and I make sure I get plenty of sleep.
Balance.

 

[shyrebel]

Quoted for emphasis.

As far as I'm concerned there is no perfect body because we are human and not plastic dolls. We grow old, we get pimples, we get sun burn and wrinkles and our hair goes grey.

I'm small, slim and "attractive" and I hate people telling me "you're so skinny" or "so pretty". Why do people care or comment so much? Don't they care about what my personality is like? Do they care that I'm intelligent too? I have a degree with first class honours - I also built 1/2 of my house...yet all they can say is that I'm pretty.

Having said that, I'm happy in my skin and body - it's MY skin, MY body and it's not replaceable, so I look after it. I exercise every day, I watch what I eat and I make sure I get plenty of sleep.
Balance.

You go girl!

 

[Remy_James]

I think the perfect body is a natural one. I love natural women of all sizes and I think personality last a lot longer then a nice rack or big cock. However, I myself am VERY self-critical so I'm kind of a hypocrite, haha. Which makes me believe that it's not so much extroverted theory that defines beauty, but possibly the way we percieve others and wish we were as beautiful, sexy, or confident as they were and we naturally feel even more loathsome.

But that's my thought, I'm only 19 for all I know you've all been through this phase.

 

[structure]

A healthy body does it for me. Nice smooth skin, curves, and the owner has a willingess to play ....

 

[sunandshadow]

The idea of a 'perfect' body is partly cultural, but also partly instinctive. The perfect body, according to each individual's taste, would be any body which made that particular person involuntarily stop and stare in awe and overwhelming attraction. Evolutionarily, there is evidence that people on the average are attracted to traits which correspond to physical health and the ability to create and raise children. On the other hand evolutionarily there is evidence that people like foods that will nourish them and provide them with energy and a bit of padding as a safety net against times of shortage, yet if we chose our food purely by instinct (taste) we end up consuming a lot of sugar and fat, various chemicals, way too much sodium... So the perfect body is like the perfect desert, it's something we can't really deny wanting but not at all practical.

A perfect desert is something we probably shouldn't have, while a lover with a perfect body is something we probably can't have. There might actually be a few people around with that perfect body, but certainly not enough to go around, and they probably don't also have a perfect personality. Not to mention that it's human nature to get bored of everything, even perfection, so what was perfect one year might not be next year. Sometimes the perfect desert is chocolate spooncake, other times it's traditional french eclairs, and then again sometimes you don't want desert at all, what you really crave is a juicy steak or a tangy green apple.

I dunno. Me, I realize that by any practical standard I am impossibly picky - I'm attracted to maybe one real live man in a hundred. Maybe even fewer. Do I wish all guys looked like models, or better yet anime bishounen? Well yes, or at least a larger percentage of them. Do I think guys should starve themselves into that waif-like look? Hell no, because I love food and I want everyone to be happy which in my mind includes not being restricted by a diet. So how does that add up? It doesn't, except to me being single and sighing wistfully over art portraying perfect guys. Would I be better off if I had lived before tv? I don't think so, I think I would still have gotten hung up on stories of guys who could do magic or some other idea of perfection, because being an idealist and an art-appreciator is just in my personality.

 

[Colton_White]

MY ADVICE:-

My advice to every one is be happy with what God has given you. and if the crowd puts excessive weighage on physical appearance ..
[e.g. how big & pretty your boobs/penis/butts/face/torse etc.]
rather than what a person you’re mentally / emotionally [about how big & pretty brain you’re]…then there is no reason to get sad / feel humiliated / depressed.

[size=+1] Don’t let the crowd dictate your happiness. [/size]

Some Funny Quotes
[size=+1] Does ‘TONGUE’ size really matter? [/size]

 

[satindesire]

In my opinion, I like tall, well built women a little on the muscley side with big hips and thighs. Busty is a plus. "Amazonian" wouldn't be far from the truth.

For men, I find two body types most attractive. The super-super skinny emo or 'nerd' look...pale skin, dyed messy hair, etc. And then the super-athletic "soldier' look, darkly tanned, buzzed-off hair, really muscular with big shoulders and a butt that pops out like a melon.

I'm kind of extreme in what I find attractive. Either a totally tatted up scrawny punk or a clean cut Marine.

 

[WriterDom]

I'm not a fan of big breasts. And would rather someone keep an A cup than get implants.

 

[IsabellaKing]

There is no such thing as a perfect body because everyone has thier own version of the perfect body.

Re-quoted for emphasis.

Ok, it's a lazy post - but need I say more?

 

[Grayson_James]

The idea for this thread started with the discussion going on in aimouse's penis enlargement thread in the HT forum. Specifically :

• It made me wonder why we buy into the idea that bigger is better (whether it refers to a penis or a woman's breasts)?
• It also made me wonder why we seem to accept the westernized concept of the perfect body when only a very small percentage of the world's population fits this image.
• Why can't we reject this idealized version and love our bodies the way they are?

I think this is something we've all struggled with whether we are male or female and I would be very interested in your thoughts. Thanks!

A body with legs like yours is a VERY good start/

 

[pixx1223]

As a photographer and a BBW, I can honestly say that the only person's opinion that matters is your own. Love yourself exactly the way you are, and next time ask for extra whip cream.