Why are baby girls so disposable to Daddies?

[DeepGreenEyes]

My kids call it being Mom.
I’m not that bad at answering in places like this, as long as I visit regularly. Messages during the day though, on the multitude of apps that people make me use for different things, are a different case.
I answer when I see it, if it is a pressing question but otherwise I’m usually busy with work, decide to answer later and then…”Squirrel!”….

In a way yes, bad manners.
In another way, we have built a system with strange expectations of being avaliable at all times and to be in those messenger groups that seem to contain every freaking ”reply all”-monster in your circle.
And we have created those inbetween categories of people that we can feel rather close to but actually could fall off the Earth without us having any other contact info than via a place like this to find out what happened.

That’s a good summation of social media tendrils, with larger context.

(I’ve long suspected that you are actually a very smart squirrel who can hop around quickly to type.)

 

[IrisAlthea]

That’s a good summation of social media tendrils, with larger context.

(I’ve long suspected that you are actually a very smart squirrel who can hop around quickly to type.)

Well, I do love hazelnuts…

 

[MaleProtagonist]

People who ghost are unserious, immature, and afraid of connection/true intimacy. They are usually liars too in one form or another. Heed them no mind.

 

[aim2plz412]

I concur. Such a relationship, is most rewarding on trust. An established link, the affection, the tenderness, the submission. Such a gift should be cultivated, nurtured, not discarded.

People just suck sometimes. If you don’t have absolute trust from day 1 …. Run!

 

[IrisAlthea]

People just suck sometimes. If you don’t have absolute trust from day 1 …. Run!

How on Earth can you have trust from day one? You have absolutely no data to go on.

 

[IrisAlthea]

That's why trust is important. If something feels off with me, I'll address it, but I had times where I didn't say anything at all. I should have said something, but I know I can't change what I did wrong.

I've got scared off many times because I've had some Dom's that wanted me to trust them almost instantly. That was a major red flag to me.

Some of the things called red flags are more of an indication that you might not be a good fit or perhaps just talking past each other, rather than a reason to be scared, hide or run.

In a place like this, the behaviour you describe could be because it’s just a HNG hoping that the ”dom thing” might be an easier way to get some online fun. Might not be what you want but hardly dangerous.
It could also be a guy who just picked the wrong way to approach for you. Doesn’t even have to mean that he’s the wrong guy for you. Men, even the domly ones, get nervous too at times, taking the first step.

 

[Missk_2022]

I can't say I haven't ghosted in the general term, but it was for safety reasons... I don't think I am immature or mean, or afraid of commitment, but there are some scary people up there. Like I love you the 4th conversation and serious stalker serial killer vibes. (The last one). And the neediest man i have ever met. Send me a title pic like first conversation and then wouldn't get off the subject.. I felt bad for him.. he was lonely and desperate for a connection. I told him 4 times that I can't be rushed and he wouldn't stop....so I was like this isn't gonna work and gave him some friendly advice...just didn't stick around for an answer.... I have been ghosted too and it isnt right. I also was planning a trip to see my d9m and he decided that he would go back to the girl who dumped him because she changed her mind. He told me that "if you were closer i would tell her no chance... but to be fair if she hadn't dumped me i wouldn't have found you"...ok?!?!?... these relationships are hard and while ghosting is rude, sometimes the story is important too....

 

[IrisAlthea]

Like I love you the 4th conversation and serious stalker serial killer vibes. (The last one). And the neediest man i have ever met. Send me a title pic like first conversation and then wouldn't get off the subject.. I felt bad for him.. he was lonely and desperate for a connection. I told him 4 times that I can't be rushed and he wouldn't stop....so I was like this isn't gonna work and gave him some friendly advice...just didn't stick around for an answer....

”Thanks, but no thanks” is hardly ghosting though, is it?

 

[K0fcali]

I once ghosted a guy who tried to rape me because I figured if he couldn't take "no" in the context of "I don't want to have anal sex with you," he couldn't take "no" in the context of "I am not interested in you because you can't take 'no' for an answer." If I lack common decency for that, I honestly could not give a fuck less.

What a jerk. I wouldnt get upset if you didnt want anal. As long as i could eat your butthole i would be happy!

 

[K0fcali]

I've been ghosted by a few men. I figure they got what they wanted from me and left. It leaves me feeling used and degraded. Still I'd take them back in a minute.

Good gurl.

 

[Missk_2022]

Well

”Thanks, but no thanks” is hardly ghosting though, is it?

I am not sure I understand your response... Thanks but no thanks is one thing... but some aren't willing to take no for an answer.... I am not going to spare the feelings of someone I have talked to 4 times at the risk of ME... i am.willing to give lots of chances, but the minute the serial killer vibes come out, it is time to cut your losses and go.... I have been ghosted qnd I live by the motto rejection is protection.

 

[IrisAlthea]

I am not sure I understand your response... Thanks but no thanks is one thing... but some aren't willing to take no for an answer...

I meant that I would not use the word ghosting for ignoring those who aren’t taking no for an answer or those you haven’t had any longer ongoing mutual contact with.

i am.willing to give lots of chances, but the minute the serial killer vibes come out, it is time to cut your losses and go..

I’m not sure what you mean by serial killer vibes?
I’ve seen some manipulative behaviour, obnoxiously dense behaviour and some actual threats over the years.
None of it has ever been made worse by my saying ”Thanks, but no thanks”.
Usually it is only words on a screen and if they have the ability to get at you IRL, ghosting is futile anyway.

 

[Missk_2022]

Got ya. Didn't want to assume when I wasn't sure. By serial killer vibes it was "we can go up into the mountains where it is quiet... we will be all alone...." first conversation.... literally these where the words... it was scary

 

[Baddad2004]

The title pretty much says it all.

If youre a little and have been ghosted or inexplicably dumped, please share your experiences so i know im not alone.

If youre a daddy and have done this to your little, what was the reasoning behind it?

God I’d love to have one! Maybe you can share how to find one

 

[firmbutgentle]

I think a lot of dominants aren't as aware as they should be (IMO) of the responsibility of owning someone, especially a little! Which of course isn't an excuse, quite the opposite- I personally have been ghosted or just abandoned a few times by daddies and for me, a commitment to clear communication is now absolutely part of any dominant I engage with. That includes letting me know when interest, time or commitment fades- Saves both of us trouble, I think.

This is true. I would like to go back to my 20-something self and whack him over the head.

 

[Strixaluco]

God I’d love to have one! Maybe you can share how to find one

I went to a local munch, my first munch anywhere ever, and I was found immediately by a Dom with clear Daddy tendencies. It later came clear we happen to be a damn good match

Can't say how it works for others. For me things like this just... happen. Often fast.

 

[Strixaluco]

I'm glad things worked out like that for you. I haven't met a Daddy Dom yet that I felt connected with. A lot of them seemed to rush way too quickly into things and I'm very new to the BDSM lifestyle. So I think it'd be best for me to go slowly. I'm glad you found a good match!!

I am rather new, too - but I was lucky to find a Daddy here in Lit last Spring, so I got to "train" the lifestyle for a while. I had a decent idea about what I am looking for and what not.

And then I got plain lucky. I mean, first munch, the first person I happen to sit beside... What are the odds for a match????? Especially as, unlike apparently most subs, I can't take any pain whatsoever, akan no spanking etc, not even pinching nipples. It would be a hard thing to swallow for many Doms.

 

[barefootgirl69]

I think much of it has to do with not taking the time to vet each other, get to know one another, be friends first. I don't think it happens only online, but many go into it "searching" and wanting so much that I find it makes us less wary, eager to jump into things.

Best advice I was ever given was to make friends with people on both sides of the slash and don't search...because it will happen naturally.

 

[colorfulnayyy]

The term “daddy” doesn’t mean any less of an asshole…guys hide behind it to see how much they can get from many baby girls. Hopefully they’re secure enough in themselves that “daddy” has other toys.

 

[lanceGibs]

The term “daddy” doesn’t mean any less of an asshole…guys hide behind it to see how much they can get from many baby girls. Hopefully they’re secure enough in themselves that “daddy” has other toys.

I think the lack of true commitment works both ways

 

[colorfulnayyy]

I think the lack of true commitment works both ways

Agree but how much commitment occurs through blue light?

Commitment, is subjective…ethical non monogamy is a thing.

 

[barefootgirl69]

You're one of the creepers, lancegibs.
How many ladies have you run off?

How about the time you were banned as "gentold" for threatening bodily harm to a lady litster?

How about that time you (as troubledone) told your little you were ill and let people believe you died, only to return within a few weeks as "lancegibs"?

I will always call you out for the sick creep that you are.

 

[lanceGibs]

I totally agree to that need for being monogamous.

 

[Strixaluco]

The term “daddy” doesn’t mean any less of an asshole…guys hide behind it to see how much they can get from many baby girls. Hopefully they’re secure enough in themselves that “daddy” has other toys.

There are certainly people doing that, but it doesn't make all daddies similar.

 

[IrisAlthea]

The term “daddy” doesn’t mean any less of an asshole…guys hide behind it to see how much they can get from many baby girls. Hopefully they’re secure enough in themselves that “daddy” has other toys.

There are certainly people doing that, but it doesn't make all daddies similar.

People sometime get this idea that the type of relationship says something about the quality or seriousness of it.
No wonder it ends with disappointment.