STUDDOG
Irish Eyes Are Shining
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10 Reasons.......smile
- Thread starter STUDDOG
- Start date
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
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silkynsmooth
Nice Bitch!!
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STUDDOG said:
Please dont' even think about that....lmao
hugggsss darlin
SexyWench
tempting fate
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SMARTEST DOG IN WORLD
A guy walks in to a bar with his dog he puts the dog on the bar and says to the bartender, "This is the smartest dog in the world. I bet five dollars that you can ask him any thing and he will tell you the right answer."
So the bartender said, "All right. What is 10+11+13."
The dog said, "34." Wow he got it right. So, he handed over the 5 dollar bill.
Then the guy said, "Don't let my dog go anywhere I have to use the bathroom."
So he hands the dog the 5 dollars to hold while he was in the bathroom. The bartender and the dog were having a conversation with each other so the bartender says, "If you're so smart go down the road and get me a newspaper." So the dog goes out the door then the guy comes out of the bathroom. He couldn't see his dog so he asks the bartender where the dog was.
The bartender tells the guy, "The dog went to get me a newspaper."
The guy throws a fit that the bartender let the dog leave. So the guy goes out to find his dog. He looked all over until he saw his dog in a alley making love to a poodle. The man says, What are you doing? You have never done this before."
The dog says, "I have never had 5 dollars before either."
A guy walks in to a bar with his dog he puts the dog on the bar and says to the bartender, "This is the smartest dog in the world. I bet five dollars that you can ask him any thing and he will tell you the right answer."
So the bartender said, "All right. What is 10+11+13."
The dog said, "34." Wow he got it right. So, he handed over the 5 dollar bill.
Then the guy said, "Don't let my dog go anywhere I have to use the bathroom."
So he hands the dog the 5 dollars to hold while he was in the bathroom. The bartender and the dog were having a conversation with each other so the bartender says, "If you're so smart go down the road and get me a newspaper." So the dog goes out the door then the guy comes out of the bathroom. He couldn't see his dog so he asks the bartender where the dog was.
The bartender tells the guy, "The dog went to get me a newspaper."
The guy throws a fit that the bartender let the dog leave. So the guy goes out to find his dog. He looked all over until he saw his dog in a alley making love to a poodle. The man says, What are you doing? You have never done this before."
The dog says, "I have never had 5 dollars before either."
SexyWench
tempting fate
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And since the Superbowl is around the corner .....
THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY IN FOOTBALL
1. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate it.
2. He came at his blind side and got him from behind.
3. He's off to the sidelines for a quick blow.
4. It's a game of inches.
5. That hole was so big, you could drive a truck through it.
6. When you get down in this area, you just gotta start pounding.
7. He's gonna feel that one tomorrow.
8. He found his tight end.
9. End around.
10. He had to stretch to get it in.
11. He gets penetration in the backfield.
12. He blows them off (at the line).
13. He bangs it in.
14. He could go all the way.
15. He gets it off just in time.
16. He goes deep.
17. He found a hole and slid through it.
18. He pounds it in.
19. He beats them off (the line).
20. He's got great hands.
THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY IN FOOTBALL
1. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate it.
2. He came at his blind side and got him from behind.
3. He's off to the sidelines for a quick blow.
4. It's a game of inches.
5. That hole was so big, you could drive a truck through it.
6. When you get down in this area, you just gotta start pounding.
7. He's gonna feel that one tomorrow.
8. He found his tight end.
9. End around.
10. He had to stretch to get it in.
11. He gets penetration in the backfield.
12. He blows them off (at the line).
13. He bangs it in.
14. He could go all the way.
15. He gets it off just in time.
16. He goes deep.
17. He found a hole and slid through it.
18. He pounds it in.
19. He beats them off (the line).
20. He's got great hands.
SexyWench
tempting fate
- Joined
- Jun 21, 2002
- Posts
- 16,559
AGE ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER
I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD:
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
This is how it goes . . .
I decide to clean off the front patio. I start to the patio and notice mail on the desk that needs to be taken down to the Post Office. OK, I'm going to the Post Office . . .
BUT FIRST I'm going to go through the mail that was delivered. I lay the car keys down on desk. After discarding the junk mail, I notice the trash can is full. OK, I'll just put the bills on my desk . . .
BUT FIRST I'll take the trash out. But since I'm going to be near the mailbox, I'll address a few bills . . . Yes, Now where is the checkbook? Oops.. there's only one check left. Where did I put the extra checks? Oh, there is my empty coffee cup from last night on my desk. I'm going to look for those checks . . .
BUT FIRST I need to put the cup back in the kitchen. I start to head for the kitchen and look out at my balcony, notice the flowers need a drink of water because of the extreme heat. I put the cup on the counter and there's my extra pair of glasses on the kitchen counter.
What are they doing here? I'll just put them away . . .
BUT FIRST need to water those plants. I head for the door and . . .
Aaaagh!!! Someone left the TV remote on the wrong spot. Okay, I'll put the remote away and water the plants on my balcony . . .
BUT FIRST I need to find those checks.
END OF DAY: The patio has not been cleaned, bills still unpaid, cup still on the counter, checkbook still has only one check left, lost my car keys . . .
And, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because . . .
I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY!
I realize this condition is serious . . .
I'd get help . . .
BUT FIRST . . . I think I'll check my e-mail.
Damn, I think I've got this
I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD:
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
This is how it goes . . .
I decide to clean off the front patio. I start to the patio and notice mail on the desk that needs to be taken down to the Post Office. OK, I'm going to the Post Office . . .
BUT FIRST I'm going to go through the mail that was delivered. I lay the car keys down on desk. After discarding the junk mail, I notice the trash can is full. OK, I'll just put the bills on my desk . . .
BUT FIRST I'll take the trash out. But since I'm going to be near the mailbox, I'll address a few bills . . . Yes, Now where is the checkbook? Oops.. there's only one check left. Where did I put the extra checks? Oh, there is my empty coffee cup from last night on my desk. I'm going to look for those checks . . .
BUT FIRST I need to put the cup back in the kitchen. I start to head for the kitchen and look out at my balcony, notice the flowers need a drink of water because of the extreme heat. I put the cup on the counter and there's my extra pair of glasses on the kitchen counter.
What are they doing here? I'll just put them away . . .
BUT FIRST need to water those plants. I head for the door and . . .
Aaaagh!!! Someone left the TV remote on the wrong spot. Okay, I'll put the remote away and water the plants on my balcony . . .
BUT FIRST I need to find those checks.
END OF DAY: The patio has not been cleaned, bills still unpaid, cup still on the counter, checkbook still has only one check left, lost my car keys . . .
And, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because . . .
I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY!
I realize this condition is serious . . .
I'd get help . . .
BUT FIRST . . . I think I'll check my e-mail.
Damn, I think I've got this
Succulent-one
Literotica Guru
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- Jul 17, 2003
- Posts
- 4,656
sleepy
today I feel like this
today I feel like this
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2002
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- 44,513
SexyWench said:AGE ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER
I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD:
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
This is how it goes . . .
I decide to clean off the front patio. I start to the patio and notice mail on the desk that needs to be taken down to the Post Office. OK, I'm going to the Post Office . . .
BUT FIRST I'm going to go through the mail that was delivered. I lay the car keys down on desk. After discarding the junk mail, I notice the trash can is full. OK, I'll just put the bills on my desk . . .
BUT FIRST I'll take the trash out. But since I'm going to be near the mailbox, I'll address a few bills . . . Yes, Now where is the checkbook? Oops.. there's only one check left. Where did I put the extra checks? Oh, there is my empty coffee cup from last night on my desk. I'm going to look for those checks . . .
BUT FIRST I need to put the cup back in the kitchen. I start to head for the kitchen and look out at my balcony, notice the flowers need a drink of water because of the extreme heat. I put the cup on the counter and there's my extra pair of glasses on the kitchen counter.
What are they doing here? I'll just put them away . . .
BUT FIRST need to water those plants. I head for the door and . . .
Aaaagh!!! Someone left the TV remote on the wrong spot. Okay, I'll put the remote away and water the plants on my balcony . . .
BUT FIRST I need to find those checks.
END OF DAY: The patio has not been cleaned, bills still unpaid, cup still on the counter, checkbook still has only one check left, lost my car keys . . .
And, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because . . .
I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY!
I realize this condition is serious . . .
I'd get help . . .
BUT FIRST . . . I think I'll check my e-mail.
Damn, I think I've got this
I know I do....can't ever seem to get a damn thing done around here. LOL
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
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- Nov 12, 2002
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- 44,513
Re: sleepy
Awww, he's just too cute....could use a little ironing I think.
Succulent-one said:
Awww, he's just too cute....could use a little ironing I think.
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
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- 44,513
STUDDOG said:
It's so sad that she even needs to do something like that. lol
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
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STUDDOG said:
A man walks up to the bar with an ostrich behind him,
and as he sits,a small cat jumps up on the stool
beside him. The bartender comes over,and asks for
their order. The man says, "I'll have a beer" and
turns to the ostrich. "What's yours?" "I'll have a
beer too." says the ostrich. The cat says "I'll have a
half beer, but I'm not paying for it" .
The bartender pours the beer and says "That will be
$3.40 please", and the man reaches into his pocket
and pulls out exact change for the round.
The next day, the man, ostrich and cat come again,
and the man says "I'll have a beer", and the ostrich
says "I'll have the same," and the cat says "I'll have
a half glass of beer but I'm not paying for it".
Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays
with exact change.This becomes a routine until, late
one evening, the trio enter again. "The usual?" asks
the bartender. "Well, it's close to last call, so I'll
have a large scotch" says the man. "Same for me" says
the ostrich. "I'll have a small scotch but I'm not
paying for it," says the cat.
"That will be $7.20" says the bartender. Once again
the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and
places it on the bar.
The bartender can't hold back his curiosity any
longer. "Excuse me sir. How do you manage to always
come up with the exact change out of your pocket
every time?"
"Well," says the man, "Several years ago I was
cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I
rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for
anything,just put my hand in my pocket, and the right
amount of money will always be there."
"That's brilliant!" says the bartender. "Most
people would wish for a million dollars or something,
but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long
as you live!" "That's right! Whether it's a gallon
of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always
there." says the man.
The bartender asks "One other thing, sir, what's
with the ostrich and the cat?" The man replies "My
second wish was for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy".
Can't help but wonder what the 3rd wish was....
silkynsmooth
Nice Bitch!!
- Joined
- Jan 11, 2003
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- 4,881
*BUMP* for Studdog
Huggss sweetie
Huggss sweetie
SexyWench
tempting fate
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- Posts
- 16,559
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
- Joined
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- Posts
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~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2002
- Posts
- 44,513
Always Wear Your Underwear
A couple drove their car to K-Mart. Their
car broke down in the parking lot. The man told
his wife to go on with the shopping while he fixed
the car there in the lot. The wife returned later
to see a small group of people near the car.
On closer inspection she saw a pair of male legs
protruding from under the chassis. Although the
man was in shorts, they had ridden up his legs, and
his lack of underpants had turned his private parts
into glaringly public ones.
Unable to stand the embarrassment she dutifully
stepped forward, quickly put her hand up his
shorts and tucked everything back into place.
On regaining her feet she looked across the hood and
found herself staring at her husband who was
standing idly by. The poor mechanic under the car
had to have three stitches in his head.
A couple drove their car to K-Mart. Their
car broke down in the parking lot. The man told
his wife to go on with the shopping while he fixed
the car there in the lot. The wife returned later
to see a small group of people near the car.
On closer inspection she saw a pair of male legs
protruding from under the chassis. Although the
man was in shorts, they had ridden up his legs, and
his lack of underpants had turned his private parts
into glaringly public ones.
Unable to stand the embarrassment she dutifully
stepped forward, quickly put her hand up his
shorts and tucked everything back into place.
On regaining her feet she looked across the hood and
found herself staring at her husband who was
standing idly by. The poor mechanic under the car
had to have three stitches in his head.
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
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SexyWench
tempting fate
- Joined
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- Posts
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Smile
Have you ever felt like you knew someone a long, long time ago?
Another place, another time, a friendship of the souls?
Two people who share a bond for reasons neither know,
A feeling that they were friends, a long, long time ago?
Did they stumble onto each other by pure circumstance,
Or was it fate and destiny that played a certain hand?
Two souls intertwined, they are worlds apart,
But the soul, it knows no difference, in matters of the heart.
Somehow they are drawn together, fate has brought them back,
Each living worlds apart, they journey separate paths.
When this life is over, and a new life begins,
Their souls will find each other, two souls that we call friends.
Have you ever felt like you knew someone a long, long time ago?
Another place, another time, a friendship of the souls?
Two people who share a bond for reasons neither know,
A feeling that they were friends, a long, long time ago?
Did they stumble onto each other by pure circumstance,
Or was it fate and destiny that played a certain hand?
Two souls intertwined, they are worlds apart,
But the soul, it knows no difference, in matters of the heart.
Somehow they are drawn together, fate has brought them back,
Each living worlds apart, they journey separate paths.
When this life is over, and a new life begins,
Their souls will find each other, two souls that we call friends.
STUDDOG
Irish Eyes Are Shining
- Joined
- Aug 27, 2002
- Posts
- 6,327
SexyWench said:Smile
Have you ever felt like you knew someone a long, long time ago?
Another place, another time, a friendship of the souls?
Two people who share a bond for reasons neither know,
A feeling that they were friends, a long, long time ago?
Did they stumble onto each other by pure circumstance,
Or was it fate and destiny that played a certain hand?
Two souls intertwined, they are worlds apart,
But the soul, it knows no difference, in matters of the heart.
Somehow they are drawn together, fate has brought them back,
Each living worlds apart, they journey separate paths.
When this life is over, and a new life begins,
Their souls will find each other, two souls that we call friends.
Many people will walk in
and out of your life,
but only true friends will leave
footprints in your heart.
Thank you sweetheart.....you have in mine
SexyWench
tempting fate
- Joined
- Jun 21, 2002
- Posts
- 16,559
STUDDOG said:Many people will walk in
and out of your life,
but only true friends will leave
footprints in your heart.
Thank you sweetheart.....you have in mine
Evening darling ..... that is so true
Promise Never To Untie
The tender words are spoken
Each body and soul bared
Told secrets over endless days
Often doing more than dared
New world beyond my door
With intrigued and intensity
Now we have shared our hearts
A bond now made it permanently
Facing our days made easier
Despite any type of weather
Each other's heart felt deeply
Both happy we stuck together
It took us some time and effort
The bonding as strong as glue
I now promise never to untie
The strings I have tied with you
The understanding of each other
Breaths to take, we breathe the air
As the relationship interchanges
Knowing our loving hearts are there
Now we are never left on the outside
Lovingly enter each others domain
Smiling. laughing and forever teasing
But forever friends we then became
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
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- Posts
- 44,513
A http://g.fool.com/art/Features/kiss.GIF for you sweetie!
http://www.joygreetings.com/passingships.shtml
Love you!
http://www.joygreetings.com/passingships.shtml
Love you!
Last edited:
babycake190
Sugar & Spice
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babycake190
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babycake190
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babycake190
Sugar & Spice
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babycake190
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