Advice for a new Dom

[ToPleaseHim]

What advice would you give to a 20 year old guy embarking on his BDSM journey as a Dom?

 

[Magesthicc]

He needs to define what kind he wants to be, that will definitely help him to find his subs.
Gentle Dom? Aggressive? Wants to have more than 1?

He wants women that are already in a relationship? Singles?

Don't know if this can help him. Worked for me back in the day.

 

[ToPleaseHim]

Here’s a thread from the way back machine: https://forum.literotica.com/threads/bdsm-questions-and-answers.39661/.

I’m going to bump it. As with most threads here, it goes off topic a few times, but so much good discussion there.

 

[Kevinjkson]

If I could give one piece of advice to my 20 year old self, it would be to read and watch a lot of BDSM porn. It serves two purposes.

1) It moves your personal Overton Window, which for most young people is very narrow and very prescribed by cultural and societal norms and programming. Seeing and reading what turns other people on, how other people like to play, helps to stretch our sense of what is "ok," what is "normal," and what is not.

2) It informs what turns us on and what doesn't. A 20 year old, even a precocious one, has precious little real world experience to draw from. They may have a sense of what kind of things they like, what turns them on - but only a vague one. By exposing themselves to lots of different kinds of play, lots of different shapes of bodies, lots of different types of energy and scenes, they learn what they want to try themselves and what they don't.

If I could give a second piece of advice, it would be "don't be afraid."

K

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Simply being a Dominant:

• Does not make you in charge of anyone.
• Does not make you smarter than a sub.
• Does not make you a mind reader.
• Does not mean you have all the ideas.

You may be elected leader, but D/s is a group project.