Advice Please

[Guest]

I have two friends, they were rumored to be having an affair. I confronted both, the woman is married, but now in the process of splitting with her mate. They both denied to my face anything was happening. The male friend of mine attended a wedding with me, as well as other family functions. We were very close, and we slept together. They both have no idea I found out about them, and are still playing the innocent act. My question, How do you think I should deal with situation? Keeping in mind we must all work together.

Thanks for your time

 

[KillerMuffin]

How can they have no idea that you found out about them when you've already confronted them about it?

Anyway, my advice is that unless it personally affects you in some detrimental way, stay out of it. You can't control what other people do and when you try to you only make life hell for yourself and lose your friends. They'll either crash and burn on their own or they won't. They may come to you for advice or they may not. The only thing you can do right now, is to be a friend. That means to be there for them as nonjudgementally as you know how. Sleeping together does not give anyone ownership papers. It may hurt that he prefers her to you, but throwing the monkey wrench into their relationship, whatever it may be, isn't going to help you any. It will, in fact, hurt you the worst. If you want them as friends, then be a friend. If you don't, then meddle.

 

[Dhalgren]

Hmm..
Are you perhaps a bit jealous of their budding relationship?

Are you more bothered because you like the guy..or because they aren't being entirely honest with you about their personal relationship?

Trying to stop love between two people is more difficult than stopping a moving train with your foot!

Could be they denied the truth from you because they fear hurting your feelings..and they recognize that you all still need to work together.

Personally I would look inside myself and analize why I'm so bothered by this relationship between them..

If you were "dating" the guy, then maybe your friends could have been more sensitive to your feelings...by letting you know what's going on themselves instead of letting you find out through rumours along with the rest of the town.

And if you spoke truthfully to them on that level, without it feeling "confrontational" to either party...they may decide they
can be honest with you.

 

[Lancaster]

Do nothing. Live and let live.