Bisexuals

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bisexuals

Um...I think you're confused (no pun intended_. It's not I who have a chip on my shoulder. On the contrary, it's you, because you have insinuated that I don't like women or I have no respect for them when in reality it's just you I don't like.

Good grief. Are you going to keep following me around to every thread I post on just to insult me and bash my posts? Read this carefully: I do NOT know why you started bashing all my posts in the first place, I don't know why you started a thread for the purpose of insulting me, and I definitely do not know why you continue to follow my around the board and take issue with everything I say. But it looks like I'm going to have to put you back on ignore because whatever your problem may be with me, I can see it is pointless to talk to you. You don't know me, yet you just made up your mind to harass me and take issue with everything I post here. Again, I don't know why. And at this point, I really don't care. It's annoying, and I suggest you stop.

This is a thread about bisexuality. I posted here because I am what the dominant culture labels as bisexual. If you don't like my posts, then don't read them. This is the last I'm going to say to you about this.

Xtaabay

 

[DirkPryde]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Bisexuals

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[MrKismet]

For as long as I can remember having sexual thoughts they've been equally about men and women. Have had sex with both -- love both.

I'm attracted to people because of their individual qualities, not their genitalia.

If someone inquires as to my sexual preference, I simply tell them, "I'm flexible."

And very content.

 

[DirkPryde]

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[SensualMan]

Homophobic

I just wanted to throw in a comment here about something I feel strongly about. A lot of people throw around the word "homophobic" to describe anyone that opposes homosexuality and the homosexual "agenda" that many feel is being pushed on America. I think that is a misuse of the word. Just because someone has a moral or religious objection to homosexuality does not make them a homophobe. A homophobe is someone that fears homosexuality because of a lack of understanding. Not a lack of understanding of what you think it means to be gay, but a misplaced fear in unfounded stereotypes. (i.e. gay men are pedophiles or want to have sex with all men, all lesbians are butch dykes) I know many educated conservative people that are simply opposed to homosexuality for a moral reason, and that it their right. Now unless the gay community stops treating those conservatives as unenlightened or as the enemy, no progress will be made in gaining acceptance. It is not because of a lack of understanding, or some mispaced fear that most conservatives oppose homosexuality; it is because they simply have a moral objection to it.


I myself am bi and my wife knows, the rest of my family does not. I am bi, but I am also monogomous and am now happily married to a wonderful woman. I don't feel any compelling need to inform anyone other than the person I am sleeping with of my sexual preference. If you do, that is your right, but you can not force the rest of society to accept ANY lifestyle choice you make.

 

[Netzach]

I think I can force the rest of society to refrain from attaching me to a chain link fence and beating me to death.

 

[SensualMan]

Keep your post in the realm of reason...

Come on Netzach...you can do better than that. People of all races, religions, sexual preferences, ethnicities have been brutally killed by ignorant people. Acts of violence against homosexuals are no moe prevelant than they are against any other ethnic, religious, or economic minority in this country. While I do not condone any sort of violence against another person, the risk of you getting strung up in this country because you "come out" is very, very low. Sure you may have to deal with strange looks, maybe some name calling, and some resistance to your lifestyle....but be an adult about it and deal with it. People in this country are way too easily offended, and if you are offended by someone using the word "fag" for example, than that is your problem.

 

[DirkPryde]

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[Ladybird]

Gay, lesbian, bi? Not me... I consider myself 'sexual'. Surely to be able to love and make love to people of both sexes with equal desire and pleasure is true sexuality. No labels requried, let those that are limited to loving just one sex wear them.

I've told just a couple of my family about my sexuality, and they're been quiet, but accepting. I made the mistake of telling a girlfriend that I thought was open minded, I don't hear from her any more.

And as a single again woman, I've learnt not to be too forthcoming with guys I meet and date. A couple have seen my sexuality only as a way of having two women in their bed.

I've learnt a few lessons along the way, and no doubt there are more still to be learnt..... but I love being sexual!!

 

[John Doe]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bisexuals

Good grief. Are you going to keep following me around to every thread I post on just to insult me and bash my posts? Read this carefully: I do NOT know why you started bashing all my posts in the first place...and I definitely do not know why you continue to follow my around the board and take issue with everything I say. But it looks like I'm going to have to put you back on ignore because whatever your problem may be with me, I can see it is pointless to talk to you. You don't know me, yet you just made up your mind to harass me and take issue with everything I post here. Again, I don't know why. And at this point, I really don't care. It's annoying, and I suggest you stop.

This is a thread about bisexuality. I posted here because I am what the dominant culture labels as bisexual. If you don't like my posts, then don't read them. This is the last I'm going to say to you about this.

Xtaabay

My thoughts exactly. I'm glad you agree.

 

[Queersetti]

Re: Homophobic

I just wanted to throw in a comment here about something I feel strongly about. A lot of people throw around the word "homophobic" to describe anyone that opposes homosexuality and the homosexual "agenda" that many feel is being pushed on America. I think that is a misuse of the word. Just because someone has a moral or religious objection to homosexuality does not make them a homophobe. A homophobe is someone that fears homosexuality because of a lack of understanding. Not a lack of understanding of what you think it means to be gay, but a misplaced fear in unfounded stereotypes. (i.e. gay men are pedophiles or want to have sex with all men, all lesbians are butch dykes) I know many educated conservative people that are simply opposed to homosexuality for a moral reason, and that it their right. Now unless the gay community stops treating those conservatives as unenlightened or as the enemy, no progress will be made in gaining acceptance. It is not because of a lack of understanding, or some mispaced fear that most conservatives oppose homosexuality; it is because they simply have a moral objection to it.


I myself am bi and my wife knows, the rest of my family does not. I am bi, but I am also monogomous and am now happily married to a wonderful woman. I don't feel any compelling need to inform anyone other than the person I am sleeping with of my sexual preference. If you do, that is your right, but you can not force the rest of society to accept ANY lifestyle choice you make.

And what is the basis for their moral position, if it is not misunderstanding or fear?

 

[Queersetti]

Re: Keep your post in the realm of reason...

Come on Netzach...you can do better than that. People of all races, religions, sexual preferences, ethnicities have been brutally killed by ignorant people. Acts of violence against homosexuals are no moe prevelant than they are against any other ethnic, religious, or economic minority in this country. While I do not condone any sort of violence against another person, the risk of you getting strung up in this country because you "come out" is very, very low. Sure you may have to deal with strange looks, maybe some name calling, and some resistance to your lifestyle....but be an adult about it and deal with it. People in this country are way too easily offended, and if you are offended by someone using the word "fag" for example, than that is your problem.

The fact that acts of violence are committed against other targeted groups in no way justifies such actions against gays, nor does it lessen the pain inflicted on those who have been victims.

I have been the victim of physical assault because of my sexuality. I have to object to your blithe dismissal of the experiences of others.

Yes, someone calling me "fag" is my problem. So was the bottle that smashed into my head immediately thereafter. It's a problem I deal with, I do not hide in the closet and wag my finger at others.

 

[John Doe]

Re: Re: Keep your post in the realm of reason...

...I do not hide in the closet and wag my finger at others.

No, you obviously don't hide on the closet while you're doing that. What's the point of wagging your finger if no one can see you, right?

 

[TechnoSlut]

As has already been somewhen intimated in here already, the prblem with disdaining all 'labels' or with making up your own cutesy terms to identify yourself that only you and your loved ones understand is that it oinly facilitates bi invisibilty.

The otherwise-hetero straight chicks fooling around with other chicks for male attention (TATU, Britney, every drunk girl at pub in first year uni) bolster the common opion that Bi doesn't really exist, as in bi girls are girls who experiment but don't actually fall in love with/commit to women. If we don't work against that we foster it as well.

(At the same time, let the drunk chicks experiment, some of them may turn out serious about it and in the meantime I'll show you the ropes baby.)

Where it really hurts is with lesbians. How can I seriously date a girl and show the world I'm really bi and not just out for attention when all the lesbians won't come near a girl be-fouled by appreciation for cock?

(Rhetorical question. I did have a long term relationship with a woman. Still a litle scarred. )

 

[LingerieandLace]

Bump !

 

[BohemianEcstasy]

Where it really hurts is with lesbians. How can I seriously date a girl and show the world I'm really bi and not just out for attention when all the lesbians won't come near a girl be-fouled by appreciation for cock?

(Rhetorical question. I did have a long term relationship with a woman. Still a litle scarred. )

You may be posing it as a rhetorical question, but from what I've noticed, it's a legitimate concern! I mean, I know a number of lesbians who've expressed a hesitancy to date a bisexual girl; I don't know if it's feeling intimidated by such a close tie to the heterosexual lifestyle or merely a militant defense of the divisions between straights and the rest of us. That's one of the reasons I'm kindof resigning myself to not getting to experience much in the way of genuine relationships with women. *sigh*

 

[reddcutie]

Bisexuals love people, not genitals!

I am a married bisexual woman. I am married to a man because he is my best friend and the person I fell in love with permanently. I have also loved women in my time...my sexual feelings are an outgrowth of my attraction to a lovely PERSON as a whole. I refuse to be forced into a box by heterosexuals that think all homosexual urges are unnatural and by so called liberal homosexuals who think i am "just in denial" and that i must be a lesbian. If you ask me, Most people are more bisexual than they will admit, which is why same-sex fantasies are SO common. The issue just isnt that black or white---we shoulddnt have to choose

 

[south_florida_bicur]

REDDCUTIE

what you said was perfect!

i contantly here by gays that i am in denial. no matter how much i argue with them they think they are right.

i am bi curious proving that i am afraid to take that first step.

i will never stop loving all the characteristics of a women. What intriques me bout men are cocks.

great post!

 

[ethicalslut]

I recently heard a speaker who made an interesting point about sexual orientation. If you exclude tradition issues of "gender" (which I don't want to exclude, but feel that it's too large of a topic to incorporate into my little post here), about 7% of the population is COMPLETELY heterosexual, 7% is COMPLETELY homosexual, and the rest fall somewhere inbetween. You can be what society labels as "bi" and still be primarily attracted to one gender, with "a few exceptions." Doesn't mean you're in denial of your bisexual nature.

Just thought that was a much more interesting way of dividing up the whole hetero-, bi-, and homo- thing.

 

[souljourney]

Would be interested to know who the speaker was that said that. I have heard of somewhere someone said it was 10% completely hetero and 10% completely homo and the rest fall in between, but couldn't find the actual source.
I don't know why our society finds it neccessary to be so label happy. And so black or white about things. There is a lot of gray out there. Gray is a nice color too.

 

[sensualpilgrim]

Re: Bisexuals love people, not genitals!

I am a married bisexual woman. I am married to a man because he is my best friend and the person I fell in love with permanently. I have also loved women in my time...my sexual feelings are an outgrowth of my attraction to a lovely PERSON as a whole. I refuse to be forced into a box by heterosexuals that think all homosexual urges are unnatural and by so called liberal homosexuals who think i am "just in denial" and that i must be a lesbian. If you ask me, Most people are more bisexual than they will admit, which is why same-sex fantasies are SO common. The issue just isnt that black or white---we shoulddnt have to choose

While I have no interest in other men, I want to point out that the Greeks were very bisexual in Homer's time. Take the story of Troy. The movie didn't show the whole complexity of Homer's poem. In it Achilles and Patroclus were not only cousins and friends and mentor-squire, they were also lovers. This is one of the main reason why Achilles became insane with grief when Patroclus was killed while wearing Achilles' armor. The other reason was guilt because Achilles gave him his permission to wear his armor, but only on condition of not going too far into the battle with the Trojans. Patroclus ignored the warning and was killed by Hector. Alexander the Great also was bisexual and when his male lover died, he slept by the body on his bed for 3 days, drowning in sorrow. So the whole idea of bisexuality as sin or idea of gay/ straight as either/or are actually very recent ideas.

 

[Never]

What's wrong with wanting it both ways?

 

[TechnoSlut]

You may be posing it as a rhetorical question, but from what I've noticed, it's a legitimate concern! I mean, I know a number of lesbians who've expressed a hesitancy to date a bisexual girl; I don't know if it's feeling intimidated by such a close tie to the heterosexual lifestyle or merely a militant defense of the divisions between straights and the rest of us. That's one of the reasons I'm kindof resigning myself to not getting to experience much in the way of genuine relationships with women. *sigh*

Oh yes of course--just because something is rhetorical doesn't mean it's relevant, usually it's quite the opposite.

I encourage you bi people who may feel a little alienated to join email lists. Every urban centre will have a bisexual group (unless I'm just spoiled by Toronto) so search around the internet and sign up for an email list, and then when you open your email you'll have reminder that you're not alone, you'll have information on issues relevant to your sexuality, and sometimes you can even meet other people from it.

 

[anne27]

My husband and I are both 'bi'. Neither of us have come out, although a few of my close friends know about me. We've been together forever, and accept each other for what we are. I can't say it's always been easy, but it works for us.

 

[LingerieandLace]

Sexual Orientation

My sexual orientation is defined by having self-will and willingness to be open minded to be able to experience. Most people don't have the will or desire to do such emotional and intellectual changes required for experiencing life’s many pleasures. Some people simple have the desires and would settle for a lot less in life.

I do firmly believe that there are at lease two different lines of sexuality, one between heterosexual and bisexual and one between bisexual and gay. I know I have crossed the line from heterosexual to bisexual, maybe without realizing it many years ago but to cross the line to gay is one step that does not really interest me. I know that I still want to pleasure women and enjoy their company a great deal.

I firmly believe that to cross the line from heterosexual to bisexual is easy for many, but the concept of crossing to gay, I believe is much more than a line. It is a lifestyle that one must accept and have a desire for which I have no desire to do.

The bisexual side of life means that I can find different degrees of pleasure from both the male and female but to be strictly in a male relationship would not present that same pleasure. I could not live without a woman in my life as the pleasure one receives from making love with women is still one of the greatest. The bisexual side of life just offers an opportunity to experience another form of pleasure.