Blowjobs

[JWilder85]

I am embarrassed to admit this,

I lost my virginity when I was 18 and since. I've had sex with about 8 women... I'm 21. I've never once gotten off from a blow job.

Its not the girls either. Some of them pride themselves with their ability to give one dam good blow job. One girl was so determined she almost broke it off. Hand jobs too.. it appears sex is the only thing that does it for me

am I a mutant?

 

[his_lil_secret]

You're not a mutant! Not the "norm" maybe, but nothing mutated.

I knew a guy who couldn't get off from a bj because it was TO MUCH stimulation. His brain just sort of shut everything down and he went soft the minute a girl tried. I've also known guys who would rather have vaginal intercourse then oral sex and therefore get no pleasure from a bj. I've known guys who had religious hangups about it, or had been raised to think it was somehow "dirty" and therefore couldn't bring themselves to enjoy it enough to orgasm.

Don't get to hung up over it. As long as you're enjoying yourself sexually and not hurting others (or breaking the law) in the process who gives a fig how you get your rocks off?

 

[subwannabe]

Your problem is probably that you whack off too much. Many guys who do this can't even cum in a pussy when the time comes. I know this hasn't been your problem but you're probably so used to doing it yourself that you can't cum unless you are in control, which doesn't happen with a bj. I would suggest not doing it at all for a while, followed by either hand jobs(by her)(, blow jobs, or girl on top sex where your orgasm is under their control and not yours. If you are horny enough and haven't had it for a while you should orgasm. In any event, practice, practice, practice.

 

[NippleMuncher]

BJ technique does play a large part, but so does your preference in technique. It may be that you need to "train" your partner to your needs. Let's face it, everyone is different. How many of the partners that you've been with reacted the same way to the same inputs by you? Did you not have to learn new things specific to them? Your needs are no different, you need to communicate them to your partner by either a conversation on the subject or by vocalization during the event.

Other issues could be stress, location, your attraction to your partner, whether or not a condom is involved, etc.

 

[Lovernotkiller]

er

Had this problem too, think its a control thing just like subwannabe said. Whether or you solo a lot or not it's probably a good idea to let someone else drive for a while. A break would probably help too but who wants that as an option.

 

[M's girl]

My M claims he never was able to orgasm while getting a blowjob before me. I don't think I'm thát good but I do know attitude and dedication (of course combined with the technique that does it for you) is most important. I know I'm very good at understanding body language; it's very important to "listen" and feel how the man is responding to what you do (not only with blowjobs by the way). Of course it helps if there is feedback to listen to, but even if there is not enough (vocal, sounds) then there is always breathing, tension of the muscles etcetera.

As mentioned before, habits have a lot to do with it too. In his previous marriage sex was almost non-existent so M helped himself most of the time and it's amost common knowledge that men who jerk off a lot are getting so used to that particular way of stimulation that all other things have to slowly get back into the wider gamma of things again.

 

[lushlucid]

My bf said he'd never cum from a blow job before me but i don't know if he's just saying that to make me feel good.

You aren't weird, a lot of girls don't cum from anything so consider yourself lucky

 

[Homburg]

Maybe once or twice a year I'll actually reach orgasm by oral stimulation. *shrug* I don't let it bother me. I consider a blowjob to be part of foreplay, as it winds me up, but just makes me want to fuck really badly.

Then again, I frequently won't come from vaginal sex either. I've gone hours before without coming. It's a lot less fun than it sounds, and can be frustrating for both partners.

There's a male sexual dysfunction called Retarded Ejaculation. Read up on it. It may not be you rproblem, but it might make for interesting and useful reading.

And, no, it has nothing to do with masturbation in my case. I haven't masturbated in probably three months, if not more. Hell, the last time I tried I wasn't able to orgasm using my own damned hand. It just didn't feel as good as actual vaginal sex with one of my ladies, and I wasn't excited enough by it.

For me, it is a control issue, a trust issue, and it's based on how fired up I am. The trust issue is the most serious. If I don't trust the woman I am with implicitly, it is almost impossible for me to come. For example, for most guys a three-way is one of those pinnacle fantasies. It was for me too. When it finally happened, it was amazing. Here I am in bed with two women that I love, and I'm in heaven. And it still took me four hours total play, between bringing each of them off multiple times and loads of foreplay and extremely sexy action between the ladies, for me to come. Why? Because it was my first time with one of the two of them and I wasn't completely comfortable with her as a result.

The control issue is also a big deal. I don't orgasm during a blow job unless the stimulus is so overwhelming that I completely lose control. I am am very Dominant and in D/s, and I exercise rigid control over myself first and foremost. I am also very other-focused, sexually speaking, so I worry far more about how my partner is enjoying the act, and pay little to no attention to my own physical needs. As a result, I don't care much how it feels for me, I get off emotionally on the power exchange, and seeing my partner enjoy herself.

With a Blowjob, I never really feel like she is enjoying herself fully. This is irrational given how much I enjoy cunnilingus, but who said sex was rational? Given that she is not having as much fun (whether she is or not, it's how I feel), I feel selfish, and that inhibits me. I don't usually come because I want to give her pleasure, and I worry that I won't be able to do that.

The last issue is how fired up I am. If I am really, truly, exceedingly excited, I am more likely to come. That's normal. But it takes a LOT. The last time I came from a blowjob was about two months ago, and I was on vacation with my girl "w". We'd had a lot of sex, but I'd not come for a couple of days (not uncommon), and I was randy as hell. We're driving along this long stretch of pictaresque coastal highway that winds through a numbe rof small towns on the NC shore, and she starts getting sexy and getting me into the mood. We're hours away from anywhere that we can stop, but I'm getting fired up, and am obviously erect. After fruitlessly searching for a place we can park, she just zips down my fly and starts in on me. It felt incredible, as the angle was perfect, and she controlled her movements just right. Just the tiniest bit of teeth scrape for tension, and she was obvious enjoying herself because of the naughtiness of blowjob while on the highway.

She kept having to stop as the road slowed way down when it went through towns, and she didn't want to get caught. This went on for almost fifty minutes, and was driving me completely insane. When I finally came, it was unstoppable, and the single most intense and mind-blowing orgasm of my life. I had to pull off the road because I was seeing stars, and was damned near to hyperventilating.

So, sure, best orgasm of my life, but it took 45 minutes of exhibitionist head for me get to that point.

In short, don't feel bad. there are worse fates than not being able to come by blow job. I can only come with "w" about one in four times that we have sex, if that. Usually I just bring her off, we wait a bit, go again, wait a bit, go again, etc, and then we fall asleep. I'm used to it, and don't get frustrated or anything. When I do come, wow, it's good. That said, with "v", I come most of the time, probably three in four. Then again, we've been together for 16 years now, and thus I'm totally comfortable with her. She knows what buttons to push, and meshes with me perfectly The fact that I'm able to come at all with "w" in the short time I've known her is testament to how incredibly sexy I find her. And yet she still worries about her sexual performance, and frets over me not coming.

So don't worry, JWilder85. Call it a feature, not a bug, and be happy that you can come normally otherwise.

 

[Nightbird]

People come in all shapes and sizes and varieties.

Not everyone likes the same things, no biggie.

 

[chris0329]

I've had guys who said they'd never come from a blowjob before me and I've had guys I couldn't make come. I've had guys who love BJs but don't come from them and guys who'd just as soon skip it and guys who'd rather have oral than anything. It's personal. I wouldn't worry about it. I kind of like the guys who don't come that way because I can go down on them and still save some for me.

 

[WriterDom]

I can cum a lot. 5 times in 5 hours or so. But usually only once from a blowjob. There have been a few exceptions. A handful of women who could always get me off that way.

 

[dicknjane]

are you apprehensive about cumming? I used to be worried about not giving my wife a warning before I came(she doesn't like the tatse)so I would be too focused about whether I was about to cum or not, thus delaying or losing it all together. After a longer session we were both frustrated andIi told er I was worried about not giving her warning. After that I quit worrying about it and relaxed and have no problems, she can figure it out without me warning her.

 

[Mansa Musa]

Maybe once or twice a year I'll actually reach orgasm by oral stimulation. *shrug* I don't let it bother me. I consider a blowjob to be part of foreplay, as it winds me up, but just makes me want to fuck really badly.

Then again, I frequently won't come from vaginal sex either. I've gone hours before without coming. It's a lot less fun than it sounds, and can be frustrating for both partners.

There's a male sexual dysfunction called Retarded Ejaculation. Read up on it. It may not be you rproblem, but it might make for interesting and useful reading.

And, no, it has nothing to do with masturbation in my case. I haven't masturbated in probably three months, if not more. Hell, the last time I tried I wasn't able to orgasm using my own damned hand. It just didn't feel as good as actual vaginal sex with one of my ladies, and I wasn't excited enough by it.

For me, it is a control issue, a trust issue, and it's based on how fired up I am. The trust issue is the most serious. If I don't trust the woman I am with implicitly, it is almost impossible for me to come. For example, for most guys a three-way is one of those pinnacle fantasies. It was for me too. When it finally happened, it was amazing. Here I am in bed with two women that I love, and I'm in heaven. And it still took me four hours total play, between bringing each of them off multiple times and loads of foreplay and extremely sexy action between the ladies, for me to come. Why? Because it was my first time with one of the two of them and I wasn't completely comfortable with her as a result.

The control issue is also a big deal. I don't orgasm during a blow job unless the stimulus is so overwhelming that I completely lose control. I am am very Dominant and in D/s, and I exercise rigid control over myself first and foremost. I am also very other-focused, sexually speaking, so I worry far more about how my partner is enjoying the act, and pay little to no attention to my own physical needs. As a result, I don't care much how it feels for me, I get off emotionally on the power exchange, and seeing my partner enjoy herself.

With a Blowjob, I never really feel like she is enjoying herself fully. This is irrational given how much I enjoy cunnilingus, but who said sex was rational? Given that she is not having as much fun (whether she is or not, it's how I feel), I feel selfish, and that inhibits me. I don't usually come because I want to give her pleasure, and I worry that I won't be able to do that.

The last issue is how fired up I am. If I am really, truly, exceedingly excited, I am more likely to come. That's normal. But it takes a LOT. The last time I came from a blowjob was about two months ago, and I was on vacation with my girl "w". We'd had a lot of sex, but I'd not come for a couple of days (not uncommon), and I was randy as hell. We're driving along this long stretch of pictaresque coastal highway that winds through a numbe rof small towns on the NC shore, and she starts getting sexy and getting me into the mood. We're hours away from anywhere that we can stop, but I'm getting fired up, and am obviously erect. After fruitlessly searching for a place we can park, she just zips down my fly and starts in on me. It felt incredible, as the angle was perfect, and she controlled her movements just right. Just the tiniest bit of teeth scrape for tension, and she was obvious enjoying herself because of the naughtiness of blowjob while on the highway.

She kept having to stop as the road slowed way down when it went through towns, and she didn't want to get caught. This went on for almost fifty minutes, and was driving me completely insane. When I finally came, it was unstoppable, and the single most intense and mind-blowing orgasm of my life. I had to pull off the road because I was seeing stars, and was damned near to hyperventilating.

So, sure, best orgasm of my life, but it took 45 minutes of exhibitionist head for me get to that point.

In short, don't feel bad. there are worse fates than not being able to come by blow job. I can only come with "w" about one in four times that we have sex, if that. Usually I just bring her off, we wait a bit, go again, wait a bit, go again, etc, and then we fall asleep. I'm used to it, and don't get frustrated or anything. When I do come, wow, it's good. That said, with "v", I come most of the time, probably three in four. Then again, we've been together for 16 years now, and thus I'm totally comfortable with her. She knows what buttons to push, and meshes with me perfectly The fact that I'm able to come at all with "w" in the short time I've known her is testament to how incredibly sexy I find her. And yet she still worries about her sexual performance, and frets over me not coming.

So don't worry, JWilder85. Call it a feature, not a bug, and be happy that you can come normally otherwise.

Seconded.

 

[Homburg]

are you apprehensive about cumming? I used to be worried about not giving my wife a warning before I came(she doesn't like the tatse)so I would be too focused about whether I was about to cum or not, thus delaying or losing it all together. After a longer session we were both frustrated andIi told er I was worried about not giving her warning. After that I quit worrying about it and relaxed and have no problems, she can figure it out without me warning her.

I don't have this issue, sort of. There was one time when the lady I was with kept sucking after I'd come. Bad idea, as I'm really sensitive afterwards. Really bad idea at that moment, as I had a bit of a full bladder. You can imagine what happened next, and, wow, I am not into that particular kink.

I still worry about that to this day, and that happened years ago.

"v" likes the taste. No sweat there. "w" would just take in the whole damned thing and let it splash down into her throat directly. Let me tell you, wow, that felt incredible. Like the proverbial bedsheets were crawlin' up my ass.