Conspiracy theories

I only believe in one conspiracy theory, and that is that the US government has an agency that creates and disseminates all the other conspiracy theories in order to keep the people who believe in conspiracy theories from finding out what is REALLY going on.
 
Everybody on Lit. is a fat, bald, sweaty guy in a yellowed undershirt. The only thing he has done for 10 years is fart and type.








But I trust you.



Softouch
 
Virtual_Burlesque said:
:rose: Isn't this a tulip?*

What poem did Gertrude Stein write about a six lip?



* Looks like a tulip to me, bud.

Life's all tulips and dope to you, isn't it.
 
I have always known that there is only two or three, no more than five (on weekends) persons who type and post here. And I know that any other who claims to know this only says it because they/you are Them, but you will never divert me from what I know. Sorry if this is hard to understand but if it is too clear, then you (You know who you are - because I know who you are) will know the identity of who writes this - maybe it is you (you know who you are). But you already knew who I was before I came here didn't you? :cool:
 
The paranoids of the world are all out to get me. They're :mad: plotting against me and some of them are on AH.
 
Boxlicker101 said:
The paranoids of the world are all out to get me. They're :mad: plotting against me and some of them are on AH.
As I suspected.
I think you're really one of Them and you're saying they are all out to get you when it's really you/them that's out to get everybody else - myself foremost.
 
hmmnmm said:
As I suspected.
I think you're really one of Them and you're saying they are all out to get you when it's really you/them that's out to get everybody else - myself foremost.
You're cute when you're paranoid.
 
hmmnmm said:
It's your/their doing. Whoever you are.

BUT - You never really know who they are, do you?

And, how do I know that you are not one of THEM also?
 
Boxlicker101 said:
BUT - You never really know who they are, do you?

And, how do I know that you are not one of THEM also?

The only way I could be one of Them is if they already made me one of them. They/you can do that. I just always hoped they/you would not.
 
I think everyone knows something that I don’t know. And it's the same something that you are all sitting there knowing, not telling me.
 
I don't believe in conspiracy theories because I'm too busy running them. And for Boota, the latest we're sending out is that all conspiracy theorists are actually employees of conspiratorial agencies and corporations in order to begin an amusing feeding frenzy.
 
yui said:
I think everyone knows something that I don’t know. And it's the same something that you are all sitting there knowing, not telling me.

*nods knowingly*
 
yui said:
I think everyone knows something that I don’t know. And it's the same something that you are all sitting there knowing, not telling me.

How did you know all of us were sitting? That's more than we (or I) know about you, Yui. And if you know we/I are/am sitting why don't you just tell us/me what it is that I/we know that I/we are not telling you?
 
Rumor has it that I have a gender. I'd just like to put that rumor to rest. It's all malicious lies.
 
Black horses... knew it all along.
black choppers have no gender, either - or is it black choppers are no gender? Or is it something else? Whoever you are.
 
hmmnmm said:
Black horses... knew it all along.
black choppers have no gender, either - or is it black choppers are no gender? Or is it something else? Whoever you are.

There are no black choppers. It's all a paranoid fantasy. Until you see them, and then it's too late.
 
BlackShanglan said:
There are no black choppers. It's all a paranoid fantasy. Until you see them, and then it's too late.
How do you know?
 
yui said:
I think everyone knows something that I don’t know. And it's the same something that you are all sitting there knowing, not telling me.

Psst, yui, you have cum on your hair.
 
I don't believe in any outward conspiracies: alien invasions, or demons from hell. I don't believe in government conspiracies. JFK wasn't shot by two gunmen; he simply fell on those unexplainable bullets (yeah, that's it...).

I do happen to know, for a fact, that we're most in danger of an invasion within. Yeah, that's right, what we've all feared all along...

The little people who live in the refridgerator, the ones who turn the light on and off when you open the door...

They're sneaky little bastards, and they've been watching us. Every someone purchases a new refridgerator, another is put into circulation. Another takes root in someone's house, meeting up with ones living the walls, scaring away the rats, little ghosts of refridgerators past...

Oh, yes, they've been plotting this whole time.

But don't take my word for it, Mr. Doubtful. We'll see who knows what. Wait until the day comes, and your tied up in dental floss with a refridgerator bulb glowing up your ass. They get hot when they burn long enough, you know. Can you imagine what they'll do to you, that hot bulb burning up your ass....

That's right, Mr. Doubtful, you just wait. Mr. I-Know-Better-Than-You... You sound just like the guys in the white coats, always taunting, laughing, snickering... I'd have killed them all if it wasn't for the nice yellow pills they gave me. Yeah... The yellow pills were the best, they made the angels come. I liked the angels, they brought flowers, and always smiled, and their wings were so lovely...

Q_C
 
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