Convincing the right woman!

[mnbachelor]

Here is my situation: I am only about an average length and girth, I have a few extra pounds and I'm not the most attractive person, but not the most hideous either. I have been with three women since I was 16 (I was skinny and cut) however I have not been with one in the last 3 years. I do know from past experiences that I can satisfy a woman.

The only complaint that I have ever had is that I last too long. I find myself providing her with multiple orgasms, some of which can last a couple of minutes. I however don't manage to finish sometimes for up to 1 1/2 hours after we begin (yes I can last). I know my way around between the sheets, I am good (at least have been told so) at pleasing a woman.

Here is my problem: I am looking for something steady that has the potential to last. However the women out here in the area where I live go for these skinny ass guys, not a big guy like myself. The women around here are always complaining about the guys around them being assholes who fuck and run. I can't get a woman to look my way and I know that I have a lot more to offer a woman that just a quick roll in the hay.

Here is my question: How do I get a woman to look past the outter shell which I understand is not the most attractive, and give in to what I know I can offer both in bed and in a relationship? I don't know what I'm doing wrong!

 

[Lynnezertorte]

Here is my situation: I am only about an average length and girth, I have a few extra pounds and I'm not the most attractive person, but not the most hideous either. I have been with three women since I was 16 (I was skinny and cut) however I have not been with one in the last 3 years. I do know from past experiences that I can satisfy a woman.

The only complaint that I have ever had is that I last too long. I find myself providing her with multiple orgasms, some of which can last a couple of minutes. I however don't manage to finish sometimes for up to 1 1/2 hours after we begin (yes I can last). I know my way around between the sheets, I am good (at least have been told so) at pleasing a woman.

Here is my problem: I am looking for something steady that has the potential to last. However the women out here in the area where I live go for these skinny ass guys, not a big guy like myself. The women around here are always complaining about the guys around them being assholes who fuck and run. I can't get a woman to look my way and I know that I have a lot more to offer a woman that just a quick roll in the hay.

Here is my question: How do I get a woman to look past the outter shell which I understand is not the most attractive, and give in to what I know I can offer both in bed and in a relationship? I don't know what I'm doing wrong!

Well, are you approaching the right women or are you just approaching anything that moves?

Unfortunately, when the outer shell is an issue you need to go for the friendship route so that they get to know you as a person. A person's sense of humor/personality/kindness can make the outer shell get more and more attractive with time.

And wasting time trying to catch a woman that would never look past the outer shell is just that...wasting time. Go for friendship first and work your charm.....don't be desperate......be sincere. Guys forget that women aren't as shallow as you think we are....

Just one woman's opinion.

 

[corkie2]

Don't be looking for a partner to start with. First look for female friend's. The best lover's start out as friend's. That friendship is what carries lovers through the rough times!

Where do you go to meet and socialize with women? Get out and get involved in thing's other that bars and work. Try volenteering to help a community event's. This is where you find real people not bar's. Get out around us 'cause we are out here those of us who want the nice guy's. I started out with my last boyfriend as just friend's.

 

[tisluvbull]

go to the Gym?

 

[lovechild27]

You dont convince...if someone isnt going to look past how you look it is how they are.

Maybe you are going after the wrong girls...maybe check that out. If all your hunting after is skinny, typical beautiful girls, maybe you should check below your radar.

 

[SexyChele]

Big guys can be very sexy. I know - I have one!

How did I overlook the weight issue and get to the sweet, creamy center? It really wasn't me, it was him. How did he do that? He kept himself up. He was clean, used a nice aftershave that fit his chemistry, kept his hair neatly trimmed, and never let facial stubble develop. His clothes were clean, wrinkle-free, and fit. Nothing more unattractive on a big guy than shirts that are too tight. (I also think the same thing about women, too, so I'm equal opportunity there)

Instead of concerning yourself with how to convince a woman to get to know you, work on feeling comfortable with who you are. If you feel you need to lose the weight, then watch what you eat and exercise. In the meantime, practice good hygiene - hair, body, teeth, etc - and take a good look at the clothes you wear.

Women are sensitive to three things: smell, cleanliness, and clothing.

But the biggest secret behind getting a woman to consider you as a partner? Confidence! If you walk around thinking that you are a "big guy", that you are not that attractive, that, well, whatever, then a woman will pick up on that. Feel self-assured and confident in the man that you are. You might not feel confident, but if you act confident, then you might be surprised at the results.

You might also want to check the women you are attempting to get involved with. Sometimes that shy, unassuming "wallflower" might just the woman who is interested in you, but is afraid to say/do anything. Go out of your way to say "hello" and strike up a conversation. If nothing else, you just might have a good friend.

Good luck!

 

[phoenix1224]

Until about a year ago, I had the same problem as you...

I'm a big guy too and women wouldn't give me the time of day... And the ones that did left alot to be desired...

But back then, I really didn't have much confidence and my self esteem was in the toilet...

I've always kept myself well-groomed, but I was really out of shape... Then, I lost about twenty five pounds... And I guess just feeling better about the way I looked had me carrying myself in a more confident manner because VERY attractive women began to approach ME...

And the more women I had approached me, the more my confidence grew... And now, it seems that I can't go anywhere without being hit on by at least ONE attractive woman... Bars, grocery stores, even by women when I'm doing work in their homes...

I tell you... Confidence is an huge aphrodisiac for women...

 

[ChromeCollar]

I totally agree with Phoenix here. Until the outer shell is NOT an issue for you, it will be an issue for others. You have to love yourself, and then you'll see the women come flocking to you. There are good women out there who arent as shallow as all that, and some of them will be headed your way. ;]

 

[SensualCealy]

Id agree with both Chele, and Phoenix. Chele because everything she said was true, and Phoenix because of the confidence statement.

You cant be attractive to someone if you dont show confidence in yourself. A woman wants a man (usually) to show he can be the master of his domaine. Walk with you head held high, confidence in your step and maybe be a bit bolder then usual. Make a point of making eye contact and speak with at least one single pretty lady a day. It can be a simple -hello, or Miss, did you drop this? ( it could have been a bill of sale slip of your very own, she wouldnt know) .

If you dont talk to women how do they know you are interested?
We dont bite, unless you want us to! lol

Chin up and get out there and chat it up.
Cealy