Dear X

[XsnowbunnyX]

Dear Ex (friend),

Yes, we had sex. No, I don't want to run away with you. Please fall off of a cliff.

Most sincerely,
Your boss's wife.

 

[trent0553]

Dear News Media.....

He was not the only human to pass away recently, get off of it.......


Respectfully I am tired of MJ news accounts.......

It was still human...?????? (Are you sure?)

 

[jenniferbaby]

Dear Life,

Why don't you just tell me what to do? Why don't you just give me all the answers? Why don't you at least give me a fucking manual? Leaving me to my own devices was a cruel and terrible trick to play and I don't fucking like it. Some help would be appreciated. Patiently waiting for this message to reach you and not holding my breath for it to happen.

Life's Bitch

 

[hdlynnette]

Dear Needed Body Part,

Stop it...please...

Tired of suffering Me

 

[MollyDolly]

Dear Molly's Heart,

Speak the fuck up, will ya? Seriously. I'm waitin' on you, and I know I'm not the only one!



Miss Molly

 

[asian_princess]

Dear Coke Zero Gas Bubble,

I implore you to dislodge yourself from the corner in my throat in which you've sequestered yourself.

Now.

Not 5 minutes from now.

Not an hour from now.

Now.

Not when I'm in a meeting and heartfeltly imploring people to give me their hard earned money to fund my shoe habit.

Not when I'm flirting with the cute guy in front of me in the supermarket line, slipping out in the exact moment I'm flipping my hair and attempting to laugh coquettishly.

Not when I'm in the middle of recording a serious PSA about drink (not coke zero) and driving.

No, none of those times when you've thought it convenient to make your appearance known in the past.

Yours, Coke Zero Guzzlingly,
Life on hold until I can be burped.

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Beast Driving Castle Greyskull Dwelling Sexy Friend

I know you don't want me to figure you out..or I'm presuming this is the case..but just when I think I've got you pegged you do something that surprises me no end. I hope things will become clearer imminently.

I Can't Do Your Expenses While On My Knees Me

 

[bisolom]

Dear Molly's Heart,

Speak the fuck up, will ya? Seriously. I'm waitin' on you, and I know I'm not the only one!



Miss Molly

Dear Molly's heart...

Please? Miss Molly really needs your help on this one.
Thank you in advance for your co-operation.

*I'm trying the carrot approach. You use the stick.*

Miss Molly's friend.

 

[bisolom]

Originally Posted by Asian Princess
Yours, Coke Zero Guzzlingly,
Life on hold until I can be burped.[/QUOTE]

Dear coke-zero guzzler,

*Picks Appy up, and puts her over his shoulder. Begins patting her firmly on the back while her stomach is pushed against his shoulder.*

Appy burping Litster.

 

[asian_princess]

Dear coke-zero guzzler,

*Picks Appy up, and puts her over his shoulder. Begins patting her firmly on the back while her stomach is pushed against his shoulder.*

Appy burping Litster.

Dear Burping Bisolomon,

<goes red in the face trying to hold in the burp to prolong the back massage>

A lil' to the left!

<gurgles and squirms happily and takes another swift swill of Coke Zero when you're not looking>

More! More! Just don't know where they keep coming from!

<peeks over your shoulder, down your back and into your pants>

<giggles> You wearing black lace panties.

,

Full Of Hot Air Appy

 

[omahaman2]

Dear Burping Bisolomon,

<goes red in the face trying to hold in the burp to prolong the back massage>

A lil' to the left!

<gurgles and squirms happily and takes another swift swill of Coke Zero when you're not looking>

More! More! Just don't know where they keep coming from!

<peeks over your shoulder, down your back and into your pants>

<giggles> You wearing black lace panties.

,

Full Of Hot Air Appy

http://www.bevreview.com/wp-content/image_cokezero_official1.jpg

 

[availableslave2u]

dear to do list,
must you keep staring at me?
me

 

[bisolom]

Dear Burping Bisolomon,

<goes red in the face trying to hold in the burp to prolong the back massage>

A lil' to the left!

<gurgles and squirms happily and takes another swift swill of Coke Zero when you're not looking>

More! More! Just don't know where they keep coming from!

<peeks over your shoulder, down your back and into your pants>

<giggles> You wearing black lace panties.

,

Full Of Hot Air Appy

Dear peeking Litster...

Those are NOT black lace panties...they're black lace bvd's.

All man Litster

 

[Pinktacokitty]

Dear Overweight ugly guy in the pickup next to me at red light.

I know you're looking, no need to be covert about it........

in your dreamz.......





Dear sexy guy in the pickup next to me at the red light.....


I want you to look..........HI..........


Respectfully.......I have the pussy I make the rules...........

 

[Donkeepuncher]

Dear pretty girls of the world

One day even the ugly guys will stop looking at you. Take it as a compliment. Yeah some guys may say stupid things or not realize that maybe they shouldn't attempt to pick you up but there is no harm in looking at something pretty.

 

[bisolom]

Dear beauty at the red light...

Just lookin' and wonderin'...

Out of all the hair styles in the world...why did you have to pick THAT one?

Ugly Fat Guy

btw: Did you know you have something stuck in your teeth?

 

[MollyDolly]

Dear beauty at the red light...

Just lookin' and wonderin'...

Out of all the hair styles in the world...why did you have to pick THAT one?

Ugly Fat Guy

btw: Did you know you have something stuck in your teeth?

*collapses into giggles*

 

[Pinktacokitty]

Dear beauty at the red light...

Just lookin' and wonderin'...

Out of all the hair styles in the world...why did you have to pick THAT one?

Ugly Fat Guy

btw: Did you know you have something stuck in your teeth?

Dear ugly guy.....


I love your sense of humor.......


My hair style......I got it from my mamma.....lmao

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APHm8DbYkL0

Laughingly..... picking at teeth as I drive off........

 

[Lorilei]

Dear Coco,

I know that you're a very small dog and loud noises frighten you, but I can almost promise you that this storm is not going to hurt you. Yes, you can come sit on the bed with me, but I'm working and the laptop is on my lap, so there is no room for you.

Please stop shaking and looking at me like that.

Love,
Mama

 

[Husker1987]

Dear Mama,

Unless you are on the Literotica Payroll, then what you are doing is not work.

I suggest you set down your laptop and hold my tiny shaking little furry body or the sidewalk will not be the only thing that will be made wet during this storm.

Love.

Your wittle baby Coco

 

[Lorilei]

Dear Coco,

Sheesh. Ok, c'mere, but only for a minute.

Love,
Your Mama the Sucker

 

[bisolom]

Dear disaster waiting to happen...

Sorry, but I've reached my disaster limit for the time being. I may have an opening some time in late Sept. or early Oct.
You are welcome to fill out an application. Please leave your resume with my secretary and I'll get back to you.
Don't call us, we'll call you.

Sincerely yours,
Currently Overwhelmed

 

[honeybeex0]

Dear Coworker,

Quit bossing people around, no one likes you or respects you because of it. Do your own job and you will have a more enjoyable time while at work. Also, quit whispering all the time. Its hella annoying.

Sincerely, me.

 

[GoodOmen]

Dear creative brain,
Get to work, man. You have so much writing to produce. You're stronger than procrastinating brain, aren't you? If you plan on sticking around, the least you could do is help pay the bills. I can't do this on my own. I need your help.
Sincerely,
Practical brain.

 

[benvend]

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