Describe your sexuality.
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frostyghost09
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Chick who likes dudes. Yep. easy.
RUlookingup
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Dude looks at it shady...yeah yeah
frostyghost09
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and to kinda elaborate, chick who likes dudes but finds immense pleasure from *cough* self-discovery. 
Clearly I was not clear as pointed out by Tek.
Soooooooo I will lead by example of what I'm TRYING to create a thread on.
Personally, I used to struggle to identify "who" I wanted to be in this aspect. It took me a lot of work and decent number of partners invested in the discovery for me to come up with an answer. What I discovered was that it wasn't someone I could create, it was tapping into who I already was and embracing it.
So who is Riles? There's no front runner in adjectives to describe, so listing of them is pointless as they are interchangeable. Not so deep down, I am an exhibitionist when it comes to my body - I'm proud of it. I've worked hard for it and I enjoy the freedom felt when spreading my wings in this way. Oddly enough, I have little love for the comments that come from doing this on a forum such as this. In fact I tend to block most of them out. This is my own private (sort of) kink.
The mental exposure of myself is next. I crave this, and this is where the colours of my sexuality get a little muddled. I'm very much about projecting confidence, competence and self-reliance outside of the bedroom, and when the door closes, a little of that manages to get in under the crack so I have a definite NEED to challenge, provoke and pretty much tweek the tigers tail until it BITES! But ooooh how I love the BITE. I melt into it. I become a very willing and ahem....'submissive' (do not mistake that term for something it is not) partner to be led in whatever direction suits him. The more aggressive the better in my books. But I still need to PUSH back because...well...for me I MUST have him growling and groping and possessing and using me. I need it!
(it's a work in progress, so bear with the edits)
In theory, I love the idea of monogomy. In practice, it's been harder to stick to. Long term relationships have all sorts of potholes you have to dodge and crab grass growing in the lawn you must pluck, so the ideals I entered into it with are not always the ones that prevail.
Soooooooo I will lead by example of what I'm TRYING to create a thread on.
Personally, I used to struggle to identify "who" I wanted to be in this aspect. It took me a lot of work and decent number of partners invested in the discovery for me to come up with an answer. What I discovered was that it wasn't someone I could create, it was tapping into who I already was and embracing it.
So who is Riles? There's no front runner in adjectives to describe, so listing of them is pointless as they are interchangeable. Not so deep down, I am an exhibitionist when it comes to my body - I'm proud of it. I've worked hard for it and I enjoy the freedom felt when spreading my wings in this way. Oddly enough, I have little love for the comments that come from doing this on a forum such as this. In fact I tend to block most of them out. This is my own private (sort of) kink.
The mental exposure of myself is next. I crave this, and this is where the colours of my sexuality get a little muddled. I'm very much about projecting confidence, competence and self-reliance outside of the bedroom, and when the door closes, a little of that manages to get in under the crack so I have a definite NEED to challenge, provoke and pretty much tweek the tigers tail until it BITES! But ooooh how I love the BITE. I melt into it. I become a very willing and ahem....'submissive' (do not mistake that term for something it is not) partner to be led in whatever direction suits him. The more aggressive the better in my books. But I still need to PUSH back because...well...for me I MUST have him growling and groping and possessing and using me. I need it!
(it's a work in progress, so bear with the edits)
In theory, I love the idea of monogomy. In practice, it's been harder to stick to. Long term relationships have all sorts of potholes you have to dodge and crab grass growing in the lawn you must pluck, so the ideals I entered into it with are not always the ones that prevail.
Last edited:
Sensualdreamer
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I'm straight....unless you want elaboration
Oh well I'll elaborate anyways - and go figure...I'll yack it up and then people will be WTF
I adore being a woman, by nature I'm a submissive, and while I can switch to a more dominating role given the encouragement to do so, I prefer having a guy take the lead. It's not that I don't have a voice, or that I don't enjoy sex...I just simply enjoy being a woman, and having my body explored. When I'm in a committed relationship, I want to know that the guy I'm w/ finds me irresistable, intoxicating, and that I excite him where at the end of a busy day all he can think about is getting home and being w/ me.
I've only ever been w/ my husband, and in the (too many) years we've been married I can count on 1 hand how many times he's ever initiated sex w/ me. I don't mind initiating but just like a guy doesn't want to always initiate for fear of the typical excuses of "I'm tired", "I've got a headache", "We just did it", etc., it can work the opposite way w/ me where if the guy I'm w/ doesn't initiate sex w/ me it can lead to issues of resentment, suspicion, and aggravation.
When I'm in a committed relationship w/ a guy, I wouldn't think of rejecting the guy if he were to initiate sex.
Oh well I'll elaborate anyways - and go figure...I'll yack it up and then people will be WTF
I adore being a woman, by nature I'm a submissive, and while I can switch to a more dominating role given the encouragement to do so, I prefer having a guy take the lead. It's not that I don't have a voice, or that I don't enjoy sex...I just simply enjoy being a woman, and having my body explored. When I'm in a committed relationship, I want to know that the guy I'm w/ finds me irresistable, intoxicating, and that I excite him where at the end of a busy day all he can think about is getting home and being w/ me.
I've only ever been w/ my husband, and in the (too many) years we've been married I can count on 1 hand how many times he's ever initiated sex w/ me. I don't mind initiating but just like a guy doesn't want to always initiate for fear of the typical excuses of "I'm tired", "I've got a headache", "We just did it", etc., it can work the opposite way w/ me where if the guy I'm w/ doesn't initiate sex w/ me it can lead to issues of resentment, suspicion, and aggravation.
When I'm in a committed relationship w/ a guy, I wouldn't think of rejecting the guy if he were to initiate sex.
C'mon....I did mine! It needs some refinement, but it's out there.hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
this is gonna be a complex and scary endeavorthere are things in this closet you just dont wanna know about. . . trust me!!!
RyanBlack
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you had me at "bite". . . or maybe it was confidence . . .or perhaps it was "kink" . . .well whatever it is riles---i find you to be all those things, and Ive never even seen you naked---so your mental exposure works great through the ether as well
and I will always think you are HAWT! and interestingly enough, that doesnt have anything to do with your body--Ive never actually looked. . . .You nailed something there.I'm straight....unless you want elaboration
Oh well I'll elaborate anyways - and go figure...I'll yack it up and then people will be WTF
I adore being a woman, by nature I'm a submissive, and while I can switch to a more dominating role given the encouragement to do so, I prefer having a guy take the lead. It's not that I don't have a voice, or that I don't enjoy sex...I just simply enjoy being a woman, and having my body explored. When I'm in a committed relationship, I want to know that the guy I'm w/ finds me irresistable, intoxicating, and that I excite him where at the end of a busy day all he can think about is getting home and being w/ me.
I've only ever been w/ my husband, and in the (too many) years we've been married I can count on 1 hand how many times he's ever initiated sex w/ me. I don't mind initiating but just like a guy doesn't want to always initiate for fear of the typical excuses of "I'm tired", "I've got a headache", "We just did it", etc., it can work the opposite way w/ me where if the guy I'm w/ doesn't initiate sex w/ me it can lead to issues of resentment, suspicion, and aggravation.
When I'm in a committed relationship w/ a guy, I wouldn't think of rejecting the guy if he were to initiate sex.
I have a real issue with labels. The BDSM world is relatively a foreign place to me, and sombody better versed is free to voice in here, but over and over I see D/s referred to online and I cringe at it.
You are a woman. You respond to a man who demonstrates an aggressive sexual appetite. Period. End of statement. Isn't it?
Is it the man's appetite, or is it being desired as well?
I mean, let's be serious, it's hot to be wanted and a great ego boost, whether you feel you need it or not.
As for your question, Riles, I'm not sure what you're looking for- there's a disconnect between the term you use and what you wind up describing, so I'll think about it first.
You make me smile, Ryan...for so many reasons and for such a long time. (Yes, I went back and re-discovered a history there that I'd shamefully forgotten....my memory is jogged now) -wink-you had me at "bite". . . or maybe it was confidence . . .or perhaps it was "kink" . . .well whatever it is riles---i find you to be all those things, and Ive never even seen you naked---so your mental exposure works great through the ether as well
But I don't need feedback on ME. I need YOUR words. About YOU.
RyanBlack
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a friend (who happens to be a psychotherapist) recently told me (and okay he wasnt the only one) anyways. . .he said I have "boundry issues" in that I dont seem to have ANY.
I see sex, sexuality and even gender as a social construction which is what we make it and therefore any definition is limiting. To me, sexuality is not something which can be described in some kind of Masters and Johnson 4 stages of arousal model which describes everything as relating to intercourse.
Your view of your own sexuality/sensuality/personality etc is neither complete, nor is it "deviant" or "suspect" or "normative" you are uniquely you and that is OUTRAGEOUS and GREAT and COOL and FUN and to some (not me) Intimidating. But those things are not related to your vagina--and culturally sexuality is often defined in terms of vaginas and penises and what we like or dont like to do with them.
I recently met with a developmentally delayed couple who described sex as holding hands---as a therapist, who the fuck am I to tell them "that isnt sex" because to them it is. That is their context and in each of our own contexts we live out our versions of that social construction of "gender" "sexual identity," "role" "sensuality" etc.
As for me---Im open I guess---I have very few rules---1. NO KIDS, 2. NO ANIMALS, 3. NO ONE IS HURT OR COERCED and 4. No "icky" bodily fluids--like feces or urine or vomit or blood. that is about it. Those are limits I set for myself. I accomodate the world around me by not walking around naked, or engaging in public sex---but those accomodations are for the comfort of others not my own.
RyanBlack
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Tell me what wasn't clear. I'm down to a single hand that is functioning for typing and it's distracting as hell. Help me fix it. I'm not above being corrected.
My sexuality? As far as my looks, my body, I can feel very insecure. I take meds and my weight tends to fluctuate which makes me feel like hiding away. It may only be a few pounds but I see myself sometimes and wince. When I'm in this mode I tend to withdraw and become introspective. I'm not one who can post any pic of my body, I vet them well.
As far as my sexuality in the bedroom I have grown in the last 10 years. I know what I want, I'm not afraid to ask for it. I love the power I can have over a man by just dropping to my knees. I've spent hours perfecting the art of fellatio, I think I'm doing well by my reviews. sex has to have a real meaning for me, it can't be a one off or friend on friend. I need a real connection.
As far as my sexuality in the bedroom I have grown in the last 10 years. I know what I want, I'm not afraid to ask for it. I love the power I can have over a man by just dropping to my knees. I've spent hours perfecting the art of fellatio, I think I'm doing well by my reviews. sex has to have a real meaning for me, it can't be a one off or friend on friend. I need a real connection.
RyanBlack
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Jackotheshadows
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(Passing on comment of the conversation above, as interesting as it looks...my brain is a little fried this afternoon, sadly)
My sexuality? An odd blend of shy and blatant....odd because I can discuss and be interested in things that are not essentially "mainstream" quite cooly, but some sexual interests bring a rapid blush to my face.
And well camoflaged, my sexuality is, in a way. My libido is like a hungry shark sometimes, but my life doesn't accommodate that, so I dial down my sexuality to manageable levels.
Weird, ain't it?
My sexuality? An odd blend of shy and blatant....odd because I can discuss and be interested in things that are not essentially "mainstream" quite cooly, but some sexual interests bring a rapid blush to my face.
And well camoflaged, my sexuality is, in a way. My libido is like a hungry shark sometimes, but my life doesn't accommodate that, so I dial down my sexuality to manageable levels.
Weird, ain't it?
RyanBlack
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(Passing on comment of the conversation above, as interesting as it looks...my brain is a little fried this afternoon, sadly)
My sexuality? An odd blend of shy and blatant....odd because I can discuss and be interested in things that are not essentially "mainstream" quite cooly, but some sexual interests bring a rapid blush to my face.
And well camoflaged, my sexuality is, in a way. My libido is like a hungry shark sometimes, but my life doesn't accommodate that, so I dial down my sexuality to manageable levels.
Weird, ain't it?
dont dial it down!!! dial my number!!!!
I guess I could have said the disconnect is internal. I've never considered the term beyond a gender orientation type thing, so, seeing how you chose to exemplify your sexuality doesn't mesh with the term and I'm not trying to figure out how to answer. I've not considered my "sexuality" as some whole. I have moods, I have ideas that move to the top of my sexual preferences from time to time...
At the same time, I feel an accurate definition can only be based on my sexual history, but, that really wouldn't be accurate, as it is subject to the vagaries of circumstance.
So, I'll ponder some more, and get back to you.
You have no boundaries? But you seem so shy and reserved. It's hard to see you over your asshole at times.
Weak!
I at least figured you for an emetophile.
Husker1987
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Jackotheshadows
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dont dial it down!!! dial my number!!!!
Heh, if I didn't, I'd be in some serious trouble. In my younger days I didn't, and I cut quite a swath through the female population in Florida, before I realized that wasn't as much fun as I thought it was.
Much like Leviathan, though, it lurks in the deeps....
Okay, I understand.
When I see the word 'sexuality', I do not limit it to an orientation question. I mean the psychological nitty gritty who do you turn into when the lights go down stuff.
And you not having an answer, or rather accepting that it's more based on mood than a consistant mindset is fine. I get that.
Sensualdreamer
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I can see why you have issues w/ labels. Perhaps I could've better said that I view my sexuality as more like a door w/ a welcome sign...if a guy can get me to open up to him, well eventually he'll experience awesome hospitality
It's not just an aggressive sexual appetite. If a guy can't stimulate me mentally and seduce my mind, he sure as hell won't stimulate me sexually...regardless of how handsome looking he might be.
