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DLL's anything goes thread

mark197205 said:
Was wondering when I would see you again pretty eyed one :kiss: :rose: :kiss:
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Morning Markey Mark!!! come here so i can smack that coolie of yours..lol :p
 
quoll said:
Morning "D"

Did List Love! :kiss:

AUSSIE SAYINGS SLANG



I'm hungry:

"I could eat the crotch out of a dead leper's undies."
"I could eat the horse and chase the jockey."
"So hungry I'd eat a shit sandwich, only I don't like bread."
"I could eat the arse out of a rag doll through a cane chair."
"So hungry I could eat the arse out of a low flying duck."

I'm thirsty:

"I'm dry as a dead dingo's donger."
"I'm drier than a nuns nasty."
"I'm dry as a fuck with no foreplay."
"I'm as dry as a pommie's bath mat."
"I'm as dry as a bulls bum going up a hill backwards."
"I'm drier than an Arab's fart."

"I need to go for a pee:

"Gonna drain me dragon."
"My back teeth are floating."
"Need to syphon the python."
"Takin' the kids to the pool."
"I got to take a snakes hiss."
"Gotta go have a slash."
"Gonna go water a horse."
"I'm off to drain the main vein."
"Time to splatter the bladder."
"I'm dying for a piss so bad I can taste it."
"Shake hands with the wife's best friend."

I need to do a poo:

"I gotta go give birth to a politician."
"I'm takin' a stroll to the gravy bowl."
"It was like giving birth to Kim Beasly."(obese politician)
"Off to the bog to leave an offering."
"Time to snap off a grogan."
"Have to hang a brown bear in the porcelain cave."
"I'm gonna strangle a brownie."
"There's a brown dog barking at the back door."
"I'm going to give birth to your twin."
"Need to choke a brown dog."
"Going for a Rodney."
"Taking out the garbage."
"I gotta back one out."

Vomit:

"Calling for George." or Huey (think about it)
"I was driving the porcelain bus this morning."
"I left him a lawn pizza."
"Toss a tiger on the carpet."

Insults:

"I hope your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders."
"Not enough brains to give 'imself a headache!"
"About as useful as tits on a bull."
"You must be the world's only living brain donor."
"He's a few wanks short of an orgasm."
"She had more pricks than a second hand dartboard."
"He had a head on him like a half sucked mango."
"May your chooks turn into emus and kick your dunny down."
"He's got a few roos loose in the top paddock."
"So stupid that he wouldn't know a tram was up him 'til the bell rang!"
"Couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery."
"Pull your lip over your head and swallow!"
"As ugly as a bucket full of arseholes."
"If I had a dog that looked like him, I'd shave it's arse and make it walk backwards."
"Got a face like a bashed in shit can."
"Couldn't tell his ass from a hole in the ground."
"Couldn't drive a greasy stick up a dog's arse."
"Couldn't organise a fuck in a brothel with a fist full of fifties."
"About as useful as a one-legged man in an arse-kicking competition."
"I'll kick your bum till your nose bleeds!"
"A stubbie short of a six pack."
"Seen better heads in a piss trough."
"You're as handy as shit on a stick."
"Tighter than a fish's arse."
"So tight that he wouldn't shout if a shark bit him."
"Face like a smashed crab."
"As ugly as a bulldog chewing a wasp."
"He could talk a dog off a meatwagon."
"Fucked in the head."
"You've got a head like a half-eaten pastie."
"He wouldn't go two rounds with a revolving door."
"Mate, shes as rough as a pigs breakfast."
"Your face is like a twisted ugg boot."
"He's got a face like a cat licking shit off a thistle."
"She's been hit with the fugley stick too many times."
"She's two pick handles wide."
"An arse like two pigs fighting in a sugar bag."
"As ugly as a bag of spanners."
"You've got a head like a dropped pie."
"He thinks his shit don' stink, but his farts give him away."
"I wish his dad had settled for a blow job."
"Fell out of the ugly tree, and hit every branch on the way down."
"If I had a head like yours I'd circumcise it."
"Wouldn't know if someone was up him sideways with an armful of deck chairs."
"As thick as two short planks!"

Compliments:

"Ya bloods worth bottling!"
"He's True Blue."
"I'd be up her like a rat up a drain pipe."
"A better man never stood in two shoes!"

Yes:

"Does a fat dog fart?"
"Even Blind Freddy could see it."
"Is the Pope a Catholic?"
"Does a Koala shit in a gum tree and wipe his ass on a Cockatoo?"
"Does the Pope tuck his shirt in with a wooden spoon?"
"Bloody oath!"
"No wucking furries."

No:

"Pig's arse!!"

Assorted:

"Drilling for Vegemite." (Anal sex)
"I'll have a super." (I'll have a beer)
"Make mine an unleaded." (I'll have a light beer)
"Going off like a frog in a sock." (try to picture this one)
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love it Q you are getting bad...doing lists..like someone I know..lol :D
 
midwestyankee said:
Never said I was one at all - but I wouldn't be a mean one if I were.
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i always knew that about you yank and thats what i always liked too.. :rose:
 
good morning DLL, your greeting is post 500 for me.
Have a great day in the cloudy Northeast!
 
Last edited:
Good morning everyone!!!

How was everyone's Memorial Day weekend? I spent mine between my buddies and my writing, so I was absent from Lit all weekend. On the positive note, I picked up an old project that kind of got put on the shelf when I started writing erotica. It's a sci-fi/fantasy novel, called The Legend Of Kijutsu. I'm on Chapter 6 now, and if nothing else, this one will definitely be posted to Lit, because it's one of quite a few sex scenes that I have planned for the story so far. If anyone is interested in reading it, just let me know. ;)
 
DJHyrrikhayne said:
How was everyone's Memorial Day weekend? I spent mine between my buddies and my writing, so I was absent from Lit all weekend. On the positive note, I picked up an old project that kind of got put on the shelf when I started writing erotica. It's a sci-fi/fantasy novel, called The Legend Of Kijutsu. I'm on Chapter 6 now, and if nothing else, this one will definitely be posted to Lit, because it's one of quite a few sex scenes that I have planned for the story so far. If anyone is interested in reading it, just let me know. ;)
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that sounds like a fun way to spend time..i was at lacrosse games over the weekend..what a blast did any one happen to catch the hopkins game what a great one...
I love japanese sci fi I would love to read that DJ... :rose:
have a great hump day :)
 
Good morning all. Just stopping by to get my DLL av fix!!!! ;)

Had a great weekend. Spent most of it straddeling a two-wheeler. Put on about 1700 miles. Nice weekend for a ride. Visited some family. Met some new friends.

Have a great Hump Day all.
 
KnightWing said:
Good morning all. Just stopping by to get my DLL av fix!!!! ;)

Had a great weekend. Spent most of it straddeling a two-wheeler. Put on about 1700 miles. Nice weekend for a ride. Visited some family. Met some new friends.

Have a great Hump Day all.
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hi KW!!!! sounds like a fun weekend...meeting new friends is always a nice thing... :kiss:
 
blindhound said:
Good morning DLL, I am great, It is finally a nice day here.
How was your weekend?
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my weekend was alot of fun watched great lacrosse all weekend...the only downer was that I left my makeup bag in the hotel...i have to replace alot of stuff... :rolleyes:
 
Bummer about the make up. You will not need it for the 10,000 post party.
Congratulations on that.
Great paintings!
 
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