Dom Denial

Wow! I thought I was going to get boiled alive. Well, I'm quite glad that my words provided some insight on the situation.
 
Insight

Insight and a chance to reflect, and a chance to make choices of definitions and perceptions. Thank you!
 
danger

Earthgoddess said:
So perhaps I'll just,for once, enjoy this like riding a wave. And instead of struggling to define, manage and compartmentalize I shall enjoy, relax and stop analyzing. And then I shall write his name with a sharpie in my chemistry binder...over and over and over again. In big curly girly letters, during study hall, or maybe in the lunch room-ahhhh to be a ninth grader again in so many way,my thanks again to all!

I have found this thread fascinating so far. I do know a few men like that. Men who say they want their women as equals, but talk to their women in tones that real Doms would refrain to use...

Anyway, I just balked at the idea that you could consider such a strong crush to be safe. IMHO, it is not. Anything that moves you that strongly is bound to make changes in your life. Could be good changes, could be not so good changes.

You might not wish to leave your fate hanging that loose...

Maharat
 
for the time

My crush speaks to me with such consideration and gentleness it is almost startling, he rarely raises his voice at all any way. His dominant tone is so quiet and soft, and perhaps it is more my own perception.
As to the danger of the crush, I understand how problematic they can be for couples.

My husband and I have a very open dialogue, continually, about all of these issues. Which is how I know about his crush in Iraq, and should we chose to change any dynamic or allow any behavior it would be thoroughly discussed not anything one of us would ever casually embark upon. Our marriage has thrived for many years and often included crushes and attractions, and sometimes even alternate partners and open play. We are not in a position to ever take any of this casually, we simply have a different view regarding monogamy and fidelity.

My crush is also someone who has known me for almost 15 years now, and is a large part of my day to day real life, my kid's lives and a friend of my husband's. Needless to say I am highly cautious in all regards, and this crush has very clear boundaries of what he regards as acceptable, and allowable behavior. I am not here making plans to take it further, just checking in on the idea of the definition of dominance.
 
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