Experienced Doms

[KimGordon67]

I got this great email on the dating site I'm on yesterday:

"Sorry I don't know who Kim Gordon is!

Though I am a Dom and looking for a sub that I do know..

Have you ever been a sub?"

No indication of any aspect of my rather lengthy (I know, surprising for me) profile that made him think we might be compatible - a profile that also doesn't mention bdsm, or even kink in any shape or form.
I just never know how to respond to things like that ... 'Totally! Why don't you break out the handcuffs and I'll be right over'?

Sorry ... obviously I meant "'Totally! Why don't you break out the handcuffs and I'll be right over Sir"?

 

[Farawyn]

I got this great email on the dating site I'm on yesterday:

"Sorry I don't know who Kim Gordon is!

Though I am a Dom and looking for a sub that I do know..

Have you ever been a sub?"

No indication of any aspect of my rather lengthy (I know, surprising for me) profile that made him think we might be compatible - a profile that also doesn't mention bdsm, or even kink in any shape or form.
I just never know how to respond to things like that ... 'Totally! Why don't you break out the handcuffs and I'll be right over'?

Say that.
So we can watch them cwyyyyy.

 

[KimGordon67]

Say that.
So we can watch them cwyyyyy.

I suggested he might be better off finding someone who found 50 Shades 'life-changing'.
(The funniest bit was that his user name was 'socks[some number]' ... so domly.)

 

[SimonDoom]

Sorry ... obviously I meant "'Totally! Why don't you break out the handcuffs and I'll be right over Sir"?

That's better.

 

[barefootgirl69]

I suggested he might be better off finding someone who found 50 Shades 'life-changing'.
(The funniest bit was that his user name was 'socks[some number]' ... so domly.)

You haven't been to my house. Socks have been trying to dom my feet for years. I tell you, I'm just not putting up with it!

 

[KimGordon67]

You haven't been to my house. Socks have been trying to dom my feet for years. I tell you, I'm just not putting up with it!

His profile does say that he wants a woman who enjoys watching sports ... that would actually be fairly extreme torture for me, so maybe we're actually onto something. (Especially if he kept his socks on in bed - also something I find incredible painful ... hmmm. Perhaps I'll drop him a line.)

 

[cuckoldbob]

..........................

 

[KimGordon67]

I like that people can be a bit more open nowadays.

While he was treating the wife, our Osteopath was talking about Fifty Shades.

He's really down to Earth. He was saying, "Well my friends all say it's worth a read at least, but show me the dirty bits and I'll fucking flick to those pages. I did. Still thought it was a load of crap. You get wilder things going on round here don't you?"

I couldn't agree more. Heh heh!

I know I shouldn't be dissing 50 Shades ... it gave people opportunity to explore things they might not have thought of etc etc etc ... but when I get emails like that, I seriously think that's where the guys are getting ALL their inspiration from. They probably have a printout of The Contract in their bedside cabinet. Next to their socks.

 

[cuckoldbob]

......................

 

[KimGordon67]

Heh heh.

Ever noticed in the majority of amateur vid clips, guys still wear their socks? Why?
I'm sorry I start laughing and can't see it as erotic. They're trying to be all dominant and in control but they still have their woolly socks on. Cool woolly socks man, great stuff!

I'm pretty sure it's just to piss me off.
This is why I can't watch am-porn. Socks, piles of unfolded laundry on the couch, half the action being just out of frame, two-week-old-pubic-stubble ... I know I'm fussy, but I like things pretty and well-framed.

 

[cookiecat]

Sorry ... obviously I meant "'Totally! Why don't you break out the handcuffs and I'll be right over Sir"?

No no, silly sub, you got it all wrong!

Totally Sir! Why don't you break out the handcuffs Sir! And I'll be right over Sir!

 

[cookiecat]

*puts this post in a glass case and hangs it on the wall*

Place it right next to Raw Humor's post:

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1066358

 

[KimGordon67]

No no, silly sub, you got it all wrong!

Totally Sir! Why don't you break out the handcuffs Sir! And I'll be right over Sir!

LOL. I really want to send that to him now.

 

[cookiecat]

Not really: I’m two bricks shy of the sharpest tool in the belfry.

But Cookie’s post has helped me rise from the ashes like a canary in a land mine.

Tweet tweet, Sir!!

 

[cookiecat]

You haven't been to my house. Socks have been trying to dom my feet for years. I tell you, I'm just not putting up with it!

This made me LOL. Out loud, I tell ya!

 

[KimGordon67]

You haven't been to my house. Socks have been trying to dom my feet for years. I tell you, I'm just not putting up with it!

I probably should just give your number BFG ... maybe he'll have some nice white shoes for Far too.

 

[Farawyn]

I probably should just give your number BFG ... maybe he'll have some nice white shoes for Far too.

This girl does not like white shoes.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Place it right next to Raw Humor's post:

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1066358

That is indeed excellent.

 

[fit_sexual_male50]

I love these two pretty, pretty boys!

Me too handsome!

 

[richard_daily]

A "true" dom:

writes to me in the third person. (How is this girl doing today?)

writes the word "we" like this: W/we had fun last night.

insists I carry his bag when I meet him at his car and we head to the hotel room. Because sir said so.

tells me to go braless with a tight shirt and no panties with a short skirt. Heels, of course. But, you know, be classy. And he shows up in sweats and a hoody.

describes in his kinky "ad" he wants a true fuckmeat painslut who will be put in a cage when she's done being useful. Usually he's 55+ and requests 18-30.

demands he chooses what I wear, which is the cliche short skirt high heels. (I swear, that's part of why I married my guy. He loved that I wore big sweaters and long skirts and doc marten boots. Oh, the fun he had putting me in a rope harness when we wentout or freshly cropped nipples rubbing against a big wool sweater)

insists I call him sir after every sentence. And we just met.

Hey - in all seriousness - whatever floats your boat. If any of these things is in a person's bdsm tool box, that's fine. They're just not in mine.

A true dom is just a person who inspires another person or persons to follow or submit. What's true for one person won't be true for another.

There's a thread somewhere about what is a true submissive? It - as a lot of Talk threads seem to do - jumped the rails toward the end.

Does someone need inspiration to follow or submit?

That makes a Dom sound like Charles Manson...

 

[cookiecat]

Does someone need inspiration to follow or submit?

That makes a Dom sound like Charles Manson...

Not really. Inspired is a good thing. You just don't go around being all dommy to any 'ole person, do ya?

 

[cookiecat]

Me too handsome!

What's your issue with Raw Humor? You were changing his post in another thread, too.

Weird.

 

[barefootgirl69]

What's your issue with Raw Humor? You were changing his post in another thread, too.

Weird.

Sexual attraction?

 

[richard_daily]

Not really. Inspired is a good thing. You just don't go around being all dommy to any 'ole person, do ya?

That's an interesting point of conversation, given the current fallout from many powerful men being toppled by accusations (the vast majority true, no doubt) of sexual assault and inappropriate sexual contact.

Consent is the key, but how do you determine when consent is first given to "act all dommy"?

I certainly COULD act "all dommy" to everyone I encounter, but it would just make me look like an asshole at best, and a raging sex offender at worst.

However, it is a big part of who I am, and in many ways, I feel it's my natural state. I feel more at home and more alive when expressing those proclivities than most other times, and it's not simply because of the thrill factor.

 

[cookiecat]

That's an interesting point of conversation, given the current fallout from many powerful men being toppled by accusations (the vast majority true, no doubt) of sexual assault and inappropriate sexual contact.

Consent is the key, but how do you determine when consent is first given to "act all dommy"?

I certainly COULD act "all dommy" to everyone I encounter, but it would just make me look like an asshole at best, and a raging sex offender at worst.

However, it is a big part of who I am, and in many ways, I feel it's my natural state. I feel more at home and more alive when expressing those proclivities than most other times, and it's not simply because of the thrill factor.

Submissive is a big part of who I am, too. Thinking of myself as being "in service" to people in my life makes me content. Nothing to do with sex. Do these people inspire me to go the extra mile, do something I might not always want to (but knowing I've helped makes me happy, so I do)? No, not really. It's something I like to do because I equate it with my submissive side.

That being said, in the context of sex or D/s, you determine you'll act "all dommy" when - I dunno - you go on a date, have a cup of coffee, exchange PM's, have a little chat about limits, likes, needs, wants. Whether it's chemistry, connection or inspiration, it doesn't seem that difficult.