Female Dommes

[LI Kerwell]

Well thanks. I never meant to offend and a light bulb went off as I read the responses. It's a very complicated genre and not well understood by popular media, or even men in general. It was an insightful couple of days.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

... try to keep in mind that a lot of dominants aren't standing around in black leather and 6" heels hoping for a man to come along and beg to be pegged.

They're not?? But I thought stripper heels were regulation footwear.

Shit, and I spent all last Saturday shopping for those things.

 

[cascadiabound]

They're not?? But I thought stripper heels were regulation footwear.

Shit, and I spent all last Saturday shopping for those things.

Don't confuse the poor man, Honey...

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Don't confuse the poor man, Honey...

Hehe Oh, I think he'll be alright.

How about if we offer to help by busting some common myths about what Dommes are like? We could start with what they wear in the bedroom during kinky playtime, for instance. Sub women could join in too, to give him a basis for comparison.

Ladies, what do you think?

 

[LI Kerwell]

Hehe Oh, I think he'll be alright.

How about if we offer to help by busting some common myths about what Dommes are like? We could start with what they wear in the bedroom during kinky playtime, for instance. Sub women could join in too, to give him a basis for comparison.

Ladies, what do you think?

That's a great idea!

I'm going to go out on a limb though and predict that you don't wear your stilettos to bed!!!

Very tongue in cheek!

 

[MeekMe]

Make another thread about what dommes like and wear regularly. I think post 27 shows that the OP gets it. Also, I don't wear exciting things, unless you like granny panties and gym shorts. (>_>)

 

[LI Kerwell]

Make another thread about what dommes like and wear regularly. I think post 27 shows that the OP gets it. Also, I don't wear exciting things, unless you like granny panties and gym shorts. (>_>)

Ok I'll do that. But I'll keep this open in case someone wants to share.

Besides, I don't know how to close it out!!!

 

[diaperedtiffany]

Well this thread has been interesting. I guess I have a lot to learn if I actually want to be a submissive.

I'm taking notes as well.....

 

[LI Kerwell]

Well that's a good idea because believe me. I've discoverd I have much to learn

 

[LadyDeamoness]

Glad you asked

I'm not 100% Domme ( hate that title btw, why is it we need to feminize the word dominant?). Though I have been much of my adult life when I had the choice. Is complicated for me because of past abuse forcing me into submission.

I've trained a fair number of slaves and pets. Yes there is a difference. I'm not a perfect dominant all the time. During one really awesome scene I got the hiccups and squeaked like a chihuahua for fifteen minutes. I did my best to work it in but it's super hard to be commanding and domineering while sounding like a squeaky toy.

I currently only submit to one and woe to anyone elsethat tries to have me submit to them. That's why I can't sayI'm 100% dominant. Sorry for rambling but typing on my phone sucks.

Anyways, what I would want in a story about a dominant woman is the slow breaking and rebuilding of a man. Not a sissy, a man. Tear down his walls of what he thinks is masculine. Reduce him to a puddle of goo. Than rebuild him. Teaching him strength of character, physical strength, endurance. Teach him to be successful at life. Train him to find pleasure in more ways than just his duck. I don't dominate men just to hear them grovel and beg ( though out is nice), I break them to fix them. Sounds cheesy I know. But if a slave or pet doesn't leave a better person for the experience, then I didn't do my job right.

 

[reloadeddd]

Well said Lady Deamoness but I hope you don't worship the devil lol.

I'm not 100% Domme ( hate that title btw, why is it we need to feminize the word dominant?). Though I have been much of my adult life when I had the choice. Is complicated for me because of past abuse forcing me into submission.

I've trained a fair number of slaves and pets. Yes there is a difference. I'm not a perfect dominant all the time. During one really awesome scene I got the hiccups and squeaked like a chihuahua for fifteen minutes. I did my best to work it in but it's super hard to be commanding and domineering while sounding like a squeaky toy.

I currently only submit to one and woe to anyone elsethat tries to have me submit to them. That's why I can't sayI'm 100% dominant. Sorry for rambling but typing on my phone sucks.

Anyways, what I would want in a story about a dominant woman is the slow breaking and rebuilding of a man. Not a sissy, a man. Tear down his walls of what he thinks is masculine. Reduce him to a puddle of goo. Than rebuild him. Teaching him strength of character, physical strength, endurance. Teach him to be successful at life. Train him to find pleasure in more ways than just his duck. I don't dominate men just to hear them grovel and beg ( though out is nice), I break them to fix them. Sounds cheesy I know. But if a slave or pet doesn't leave a better person for the experience, then I didn't do my job right.

 

[ausfet]

I've been lurking on this thread for a while now.

I am a dominant female, heteroflexible and in a monogamous m/f relationship. What do I want? Control. My husband has desires that are complimentary to what I want, however at the end of the day, I still want to call the shots. He might want to do xyz and I'll be agreeable. He also has his limits and requirements, and I'll also agree (of course). But I am the one that sets the tone or mood, and I am the one who decides how and when he orgasms.

I've been bored witless cropping a needy masochist, but been greatly entertained gently teasing a sub with whom I had an emotional connection. It's not about the sub's desires but their reactions, their blushes, that moment when you see something in their eyes that tells you you've stumbled upon a dirty little desire of theirs.

PP's made comments about dominant women being viewed as fetish dispensers. I think it can be hard for some men to understand the distinction between a sub making his needs known, and unacceptable behaviour. The clearest way I can say it is this; a submissive man will respectfully enter into discourse about his needs WHEN ASKED and will accept that a Domme may not/can not/will not do something. A kinky little shithead who thinks women exist to serve him is just the same as a non-kinky shithead who thinks women exist to serve him.

I've known plenty of dominant women. None of them have been in the BDSM 'scene' and most have quietly gone vanilla, or found a submissive/kinky man through online dating, friends, work etc. There are numerous reasons for this, but most boil down to getting hassled by men or denigrated for breaking social norms.

 

[cascadiabound]

I've been lurking on this thread for a while now.
[........]
A kinky little shithead who thinks women exist to serve him is just the same as a non-kinky shithead who thinks women exist to serve him.

I've known plenty of dominant women. None of them have been in the BDSM 'scene' and most have quietly gone vanilla, or found a submissive/kinky man through online dating, friends, work etc. There are numerous reasons for this, but most boil down to getting hassled by men or denigrated for breaking social norms.

while I am not a dominant woman sexually, I am a dominant woman in the other spheres of my life, and boy howdy, do the above bolded passages ring true.

Thank you ausfet. Thank you for coming out of lurking status to say your piece. You rock.

 

[Beatrix_B]

It's highly probable that there are just as many women born dominant as there are males; it's just that society doesn't encourage that trait in females as it does in our counterparts.

I think many men are so caught up in what dominance represents to them or in the female version promoted by male-focused porn that many men wouldn't recognize a dominant woman were one to sit on their faces.

Women in general are complex and multifaceted. That anyone would assume that there is a "one-size-fits-all" denominator to female dominance makes me wonder if that person has any experience being around women at all.

Dominant women don't feel the need to advertise their dominance. They know what they are...just as is often the case with anyone who identifies with a specific lifestyle or intrinsic aspect of his or her humanity. They don't need validation or approval to be dominant; they just are. Even when society attempts to make a dominant woman conform to "acceptable" perimeters of female behavior, her true nature will find a way to manifest itself in some area of life...eventually.

Further, I think the way dominance presents for women is more dynamic and fluid than is the case for men.

Dominant men might think that they must always "top" or display their power in order to prevent losing face or appearing less masculine. However, we women are more flexible in our thinking. We are able to adapt to whatever situation serves our needs best, as well as the needs of those in our care.

Female dominance exerts itself as needed or as wanted—it doesn't require the pissing contests and the trash talk about whose dick is bigger—which is probably why many women don't present their power/control in a manner a man would consider "100% dominant." (I mean…who is ever really 100% dominant? There's always someone more dominant. Even the most dominant people, at some point, must subject themselves to the will of someone more dominant, whether physically or symbolically, otherwise many "dominant" people would not have jobs or function well within their careers, families, and other aspects of society.)

Dominant women don't need a percentage to measure their dominance nor a ruler to measure their clit size. They know who they are, and the people around them do too.

 

[Scentofawoman]

I like what last poster Beatrix_B said.

Fantasy has always been hinderance for a woman who says she's dominant. I had a man. Look at me at a BDSM party and tell me in not "dominant enough" because I happened to like wearing a rope corset. Whatever I told that asshat off. I hate having to "prove" myself. If I get an inkling that a man is not taking my fetishs seriously then I just move on.

I get off on the control. I like bring a guy to the brink where please is a prayer for release.


I think it also depends on how much the man has educated himself and Honest he is with himself and his submission.

I've been with a 50 year old man who said he'd like to try strap on sex but doesn't want to take the effort to learn how to clean himself out for anal sex.
In reverse I've been with a 25 year old man who was very much in touch with his submissive side and I was able to play with him and spank him.

 

[frost238]

I posted in the introductory fourm, but I have yet to hear anything from anyone. I was wondering if a female dominant would take me under their wing for a kind of learning experience. I am aspiring to become a dominant but I am a guy with little experience. I hope to hear back from someone.


sincerely, Frost.

 

[dominatrixNY]

Yes dominant woman exist - here i am. I am bi, elegant, feminin, and i love to be in control.

 

[lilcuriouscatt]

I see. I can imagine that gets real old, real fast.

I enjoy online role-playing with female subs, but something I've found is that many of them are not really subs at all, in the sense that they have never really thought about submission in any detail. Kind of the inverse of the brainless dom who equates domination with abuse. Many of these subs have never thought at all seriously about their sexual preferences, and are not particularly interested in discussing their desires, preferences, limits, etc. prior to a rp. I'm the dom, they say, and therefore it's wholly "my decision" what direction the rp takes.

I'm just wondering if female dommes have had similar experiences: encountering naive male subs who really have no clue what they're looking for beyond a generic "domme".

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

 

[policywank]

It's highly probable that there are just as many women born dominant as there are males; it's just that society doesn't encourage that trait in females as it does in our counterparts.

I think many men are so caught up in what dominance represents to them or in the female version promoted by male-focused porn that many men wouldn't recognize a dominant woman were one to sit on their faces.

Women in general are complex and multifaceted. That anyone would assume that there is a "one-size-fits-all" denominator to female dominance makes me wonder if that person has any experience being around women at all.

Dominant women don't feel the need to advertise their dominance. They know what they are...just as is often the case with anyone who identifies with a specific lifestyle or intrinsic aspect of his or her humanity. They don't need validation or approval to be dominant; they just are. Even when society attempts to make a dominant woman conform to "acceptable" perimeters of female behavior, her true nature will find a way to manifest itself in some area of life...eventually.

Further, I think the way dominance presents for women is more dynamic and fluid than is the case for men.

Dominant men might think that they must always "top" or display their power in order to prevent losing face or appearing less masculine. However, we women are more flexible in our thinking. We are able to adapt to whatever situation serves our needs best, as well as the needs of those in our care.

Female dominance exerts itself as needed or as wanted—it doesn't require the pissing contests and the trash talk about whose dick is bigger—which is probably why many women don't present their power/control in a manner a man would consider "100% dominant." (I mean…who is ever really 100% dominant? There's always someone more dominant. Even the most dominant people, at some point, must subject themselves to the will of someone more dominant, whether physically or symbolically, otherwise many "dominant" people would not have jobs or function well within their careers, families, and other aspects of society.)

Dominant women don't need a percentage to measure their dominance nor a ruler to measure their clit size. They know who they are, and the people around them do too.

I think that a lot of dominant men don't feel the need to advertise their dominance either. The aggressive male as dominant is a stereotype that lots of guys buy into. The men of true power don't need to announce it. Some do anyway because they are arrogant blow hards but that isn't the rule.

In my experience the guys swinging their dicks around or puffing up their chests or buying big ass trucks they don't need are the wannabes.....the betas......the followers. A man of power and dominance doesn't need to be threatening to get his way. A man of influence and power doesn't have 6 hours a day to spend in the gym or spend his day picking out bling with someone else's name on it.

 

[Bi_Siamese]

The dominant women I have served also have a soft side. I have given a pro domme a light caning on her request. I found most women enjoy a sensual spanking on occasion. I never spank unless asked though. Most of the time I’m disciplined myself.

 

[cascadiabound]

Im Goddess Magda 25y old from Europe Poland.
I am looking for young slaves that are interested in doing picture assignments and possible exposure online. I want him to be willing to do each and every thing I say. I he does well, he will be rewarded. If not, he will be punished.

My kik last time almost crashed, but i try it again.


Describe yourself and what you are looking for, guys with a picture will receive an answer first.

Welcome to Lit Magda. Your post will do better down the hall on the right in the BDSM Personals board.

on THIS board (see the rules in the stickies at the top of the page - you know about RULES right???) we TALK about BDSM. and one of the rules of LIT is that NO personal information is posted in a thread including kik, email phone numbers, skype info etc.

try again. and good luck

Cascadia.

 

[MeekMe]

Welcome to Lit Magda. Your post will do better down the hall on the right in the BDSM Personals board.

on THIS board (see the rules in the stickies at the top of the page - you know about RULES right???) we TALK about BDSM. and one of the rules of LIT is that NO personal information is posted in a thread including kik, email phone numbers, skype info etc.

try again. and good luck

Cascadia.

Actually, that poster knows where this belongs, but they keep getting deleted. This is maybe the 4th or 5th user name they've created. My guess is they're a scammer. So, beware of the scammer folks. Magda is most likely only interested in your wallet so be prepared to give that credit card info along with the pictures.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1448094&highlight=Goddess+Magda
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1448574&highlight=Goddess+Magda
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1460103&highlight=Goddess+Magda

 

[cascadiabound]

Actually, that poster knows where this belongs, but they keep getting deleted. This is maybe the 4th or 5th user name they've created. My guess is they're a scammer. So, beware of the scammer folks. Magda is most likely only interested in your wallet so be prepared to give that credit card info along with the pictures.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1448094&highlight=Goddess+Magda
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1448574&highlight=Goddess+Magda
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1460103&highlight=Goddess+Magda

Buyers beware. Thanks MM.

 

[Bi_Siamese]

Woman’s liberation

I think the fully liberated woman is dominant over her boyfriends and or husbands. Men can’t get away with the things they could in the 50s and early 60s because women finally have their rights to fight back. Women are free to celebrate their liberation in many ways including the world female domination demanding their full rights from the male whether it be in the office or in the bedroom. This includes women who are openly bisexual and lesbian unafraid to take on lovers of their choice. Sexual varieties and kinks, as long as there is consent from both parties, are more out in the open now. The laws are on the women’s side and now husnand’s can be prosecuted for raping their own wife. Behind closed doors women are able to do things to their husbands that we’re never heard of before. Now men come out of the bedroom confused ashamed just like their wives used to before women’s Lib. No longer can men spend a few minutes in the missionary position satisfying themselves but they must satisfy their wives as well. Oral sex has become an art form with women not embarrassed to have their men lick them to orgasm in all manners of positions. Cocksucking has become a bad word and the formal word of fellatio is now the choice. If a woman chooses to suck her man’s cock hard so that he can satisfy her that is her choice now not his. The male must now learn how to hold off his orgasms while satisfying his lover until she orgasms first. A liberated woman may ask him to go down on her afterwards to give her another orgasm with his mouth and sample his own semen. Some women may refuse intercourse altogether and have her partner go down on her only. Other women who may actually enjoy fellatio on her terms may go down on a man sucking him until he comes in her mouth and then share the mouthful of semen in sensuous French kiss. The days of forcefully holding a woman’s head and fucking her mouth are over. Women have the power over a guys balls to do as she wishes with her sexuality. The New World order is the worshiping of women as a goddess in the new 21st-century.