Female Masturbation

[Curly and Curvy]

I am 22 and never came... and I really want to. I tried all the typical advice: I took a mirror got to know myself, found my clit, bought several diferrent kinds of vibrators, and tried lube. I live in a dorm so the running water trick is not an options. I know I like it on my clit better than on the inside.I want information on exactly how one usually does this. Should I stroke upward ?downward?should I push the skin away from my clit?
--Thanks

 

[EicessGoddess]

Personal

Honestly, what will make you feel good is a very personal thing. I enjoy a little lube and just gently rubbing the clit itself for a while. I know about the issues of being in a dorm as I am also in college. Just relax, put on some good music, and play around a bit. Hope it helps!

 

[Curly and Curvy]

Also how long does it take? Perhaps I just give up to soon

 

[EicessGoddess]

depends...if i'm really turned on, ten minutes or so


i've let it go on for about an hour before, but that's when i want it to take a long time


again, up to you

 

[77Cobra]

I am 22 and never came... and I really want to. I tried all the typical advice: I took a mirror got to know myself, found my clit, bought several diferrent kinds of vibrators, and tried lube. I live in a dorm so the running water trick is not an options. I know I like it on my clit better than on the inside.I want information on exactly how one usually does this. Should I stroke upward ?downward?should I push the skin away from my clit?
--Thanks

I could come and help you learn!!!

 

[phoenix1224]

Fix a typo.

I am 22 and never came... and I really want to. I tried all the typical advice: I took a mirror got to know myself, found my clit, bought several diferrent kinds of vibrators, and tried lube. I live in a dorm so the running water trick is not an options. I know I like it on my clit better than on the inside.I want information on exactly how one usually does this. Should I stroke upward ?downward?should I push the skin away from my clit?
--Thanks

The only advice that I can give is: If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

Also, it is not all that uncommon for a woman of your age to have never had an orgasm... Some women don't have one until their thirties... Or even later... Some NEVER have one...

So... Play around, find what you like best, and try not to worry about it so much... Hopefully, it will come to you in time.

 

[phoenix1224]

Also how long does it take? Perhaps I just give up to soon

It's different with each woman... And it's different each time.

Sometimes, my woman can get off in just a couple of minutes... Other times, it takes much longer.

Your problem MAY be that you're thinking about it too much.

When you play, don't THINK about cumming... Don't make cumming your ultimate goal... Just play for the sake of playing and you may find that it'll just sneak up on you.

 

[corkie2]

When I am in the mood to masturbate I start out by just doing something that turn me on.....makes me all wet. Somtimes I might read stories, look at pictures of what I would like to do or have done to me or go into a chat room that is real busy...lots of nice dirty talk going on. When I am getting nice and turned on then I will undress and lay on my be or where ever I am in the mood for (I live alone) making sure to have my toy box handy just start to play with myself, using what ever toy I want...I particularly like my pocket rocket, just enjoy the sensations, thinking about what ever sexy comes to mind.

One of the things I enjoy imagining is being watched.........some times I imagine my Sir watching and directing me (like a movie director would) as he plays with his cock......doing all the nice slutty things he would like to see....with the idea of I cannot cum until I have pleased him....so the goal is to be as slutty as I can be.


For me it is much more fun and satisfying to not be in a hurry to cum.......take my time and enjoy how that tingly feeling and tight wanting to cum........neeeeeding........struggling not to cum that all makes it more satisfying.

So relax, let your imagination flow, take your time, get your body and mind turned on first, the take your time let your body get there and it will. You can't rush it because women don't normally cum as quick as men can because we seem to need to be more aroused then men. That is why for play is so important for us women...........gotta prime the pump.

You might try going to the masturbation catagory of the story section here on Lit.com. I have learned alot from reading the stories here........especially in getting ideas for things to do! *eg*

Corkie

 

[OneSublimeGuy]

I am 22 and never came... and I really want to. I tried all the typical advice: I took a mirror got to know myself, found my clit, bought several diferrent kinds of vibrators, and tried lube. I live in a dorm so the running water trick is not an options. I know I like it on my clit better than on the inside.I want information on exactly how one usually does this. Should I stroke upward ?downward?should I push the skin away from my clit?
--Thanks

Let a guy give tongue and issue it as a challenge. Like, if he gets you off, you give him oral like 3 times!! While he's doin' it, if anything feels good give guidance(I know I always felt hearing "Right There!" was good encouragement)
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/mittelgrosse/medium-smiley-080.gif

 

[milkjug]

Try....

Try kneeling with your ass in the air and reaching under you with your vibrater.

 

[the_english_guy]

I'll break my lurking to put an opinion down here...

You're in the same boat as my girlfriend. We're a really open couple, have tried all sorts of things but she just can't get 'over the edge'.

You've not got some of her problems - you've got toys and are being pro-active - my SOs never really persued her own sexuality like that.

The only possible advice I could give would be to experiment and enjoy it; just play around and try not to get hung up on just aiming for a climax.

Good luck

 

[College_geek]

Hey CC. I had that problem myself for a few months when I first tried masturbating years ago. I found that the massage setting on the shower head worked, but like you said, that's not practical for college (I only get to use that now when I visit home). Anyway, you just need to keep trying things, hon. And try not to think about the actual orgasm. I find that concentrating too hard on coming is not a good thing. Find what turns you on, whether it be erotic stories, porn, pictures, hell even watching a movie (like the Brad Pitt scene in Thelma and Louise...mmm...). Like others have said, try to be in a relaxed state. Breathe deeply, it helps relax and can actually encourage orgasms, I believe.

There is no right or wrong way to rubbing the clit. Some people need direct clit stimulation to orgasm, some people find that way too intense and need stimulation around the clit. Personally, rubbing in circles around my clit is what works for me, but other people rub up and down, back and forth, diagonally, whatever.

Good luck, keep at it, and keep us informed.

 

[EicessGoddess]

mmm so many good ideas from all of you! i should try them out...might make mine better!

 

[LadyJeanne]

I had trouble too when I first started having sex. The shower attachment gave me my first orgasm. I haven't had much luck with vibrators, either - the noise is too distracting.

Fantasizing while masturbating is really important for me. I can't get off without a fantasy, meaning, just rubbing without thinking about something that turns me on will never, ever get me to orgasm. I also learned how to contract my PC muscles while rubbing - brings the orgasm faster.

Good luck, and most important, have FUN.

 

[sweetgirl666]

Ah, I wouldnt worry. you are still very young.

I had my first real, big, mindblowing orgasm last year...makes me... just turned 24 when that happened. From talking to many older female friends that sounds about a normal age.

Also, what I found is that it only really works when I am not trying to get it to work. I have to be relaxed and my mood just right. For me reading erotic stories beforehand. The worst that can happen is when I am with my sexual partner and he wants me to orgasm. Never, ever works! I had a few by now (big orgasms, not those little ones who are also already good) but only when the mood between us was just right and he did not make it a competition.

 

[BlueSugar]

patience, motivation, an idea or two and time.

Some women have a hard time letting go and just letting it happen... this may be a mind over matter issue for you and you should think about your experiences in the past to see if anything is keeping you from losing control and allowing yourself to have an orgasm.

Use different strokes and speeds, tease yourself over some fabric, like a silky pair of panties or just cotton. Use your whole hand to massage the area, slap it a little ... who knows what'll get your juices flowing. Dip a finger or two inside yourself, tease your opening , stroke the wetness over your clit... move the skin around, on your clit, touch the tip, the top... move around in circles, move your hips. Squeeze your kegals around your fingers or a toy...
rent some porno, print out a story or two... indulge your mind in things that make you horny.

You could also be nervous that you're going to be walked in on, so try and pick a timeframe that you know no one will be around for, for a while... give yourself some 'me' time.

Alot of stories about finding your orgasm are all lovey dovey, and include alot of panting and candles ... bah ... its different for everyone, some happen quick and some last forever.

 

[College_geek]

Alot of stories about finding your orgasm are all lovey dovey, and include alot of panting and candles ... bah ... its different for everyone, some happen quick and some last forever.

Hahaha, I should write a story about finding my orgasm. It would be really bizarre, but completely honest. Like how I started singing Rocky Horror Picture Show songs in my head to distract me from orgasming.

 

[BlueSugar]

Hahaha, I should write a story about finding my orgasm. It would be really bizarre, but completely honest. Like how I started singing Rocky Horror Picture Show songs in my head to distract me from orgasming.

hahaha, awesome.
I was going to reconmend The Vagina Monologues bc some of the skits are pretty cool... and then make a sappy sunshine post. But sometimes, smut and dirty talk works just as good!

 

[EicessGoddess]

hmm i want one of those forever ones!

 

[horny_boi]

I like female masturbation

 

[toolhholder]

I know this is about masturbation, but maybe this is relevant

A long term girl friend, some time back, we're not together now, could not get off on anything we tried (and believe me we tried everything). Then one day, while she was doing something else (I think it was making the bed) I just went behind her, no foreplay or naything and we had a very fast, noisy fuck which led to her having an explosive orgasm. Afterwards we decided it wasn't the osition or anything, it iwas the informality - for too long sex had not been just for fun it had been the search for that elusive cum. That seemed to unblock the dam anyway - just being relaxed about it I guess - let the orgasm sneak up when it's ready.

 

[Eilan]

With all due respect to you guys out there who want to lend a hand (or a tongue, or. . .), it might be best for her to learn about what she likes on her own. Then she can show you!

Curly and Curvy, you've been given some really good advice here. I'm not sure that I can add much more. Continue doing what feels good, but don't put a lot of pressure on yourself. It'll happen.

 

[sweet_marie]

late bloomer

I was a late bloomer as well, so first off don't feel bad. Second off, privacy is the key....although the chance of getting caught can add to the fun.

Third off, don't try so hard. I asked an army friend how to do it and this is what she told me and it worked.

Watch a sexy movie or read a sexy story. Get a good image of the sexiest thing you can think of (for me at first it was a waterfall...as innocent or dirty or whatever, its all about you). Then hold that image in your head and play around....when something makes your eyes pop, keeping doing it.

Hope that helps and here's to fun!
Marie

 

[miss_kate]

Be patient young grasshopper... if you are over eager or over analysing the situation it probably wont happen... try to relax and stop from thinking...

ORGASM ORGASM ORGASM

Good luck sweetypie

 

[Stroker1]

Curly & Curvy:
There's a web site www.solotouch.com that might help you out. Go to the techniques section & click on. Then female techniques. Hope that it works out for you. I can't beleive you haven't had an orgasm with a vibrator. Vibrators usually send most women into orgasmic heaven. Let me know if it works out for you.

Stroker 1