Found video of someone I know...tell them?

[sexkept_secret]

.....

 

[Kinky_babygirl]

She either does or does not already know of the video. The friend has three choices: 1) don't tell; 2) tell anonymously; 3) tell as a friend.

The friend must decide: is she better off knowing or not knowing? If she already knows, telling in any way won't change things. If she doesn't know, is that better than knowing? Telling anonymously at least alerts her. Telling as a friend either obligates or alienates her.

Which is best? I'll say: telling anonymously. That gives her the most possible benefit and the friend has the least possible pain -- a minimax solution, imperfect, but leaving her ignorant does her no favor.

I didn't comment on whether I think he should or should not. I simply gave my opinion on the email option. My biggest reserve---put yourself in someone's shoes....wondering about everyone you know, being so embarrassed by that..wondering who knows. You say telling anonymously will cause the least possible pain. I don't think so at all. But I'm not trying to convince you to think like me, we disagree. That's ok. Just sharing my thoughts.
KB

 

[Eilan]

The OP's last activity on this site was October 1. Just sayin'.

 

[Putt88]

My Two Cents and then Some

1) This is thread contains some pretty witty remarks!

I think I need to see the video before I can offer advice. What's the link?

2) I absolutely agree with BongoGal. We really need to see the key piece of evidence in order to offer sound and proper advice.

lol Just bring a copy of the masturbation video to the next family get together and ask everyone to gather around to watch some clips from the internet that you found, then you can let one...or more, of the other family members recognize her and have THEM tell her...thus letting you off the hook.

3) If you follow Shelby's approach, (a) you better have a (or more) hidden camera(s) recording the reaction of the family as they watch your sister-in-laws performance unfold, and (b) have a portable defibrillator on hand for her parents.

Seriously - Do not take some anonymous action alerting her of this video! Someone mentioned it earlier, and I absolutely agree, the paranoia of wondering who the tipster was would be horrible, even life changing. I think most people would be mortified and somewhat tormented wondering who the tipster was - a co-worker, boss, friend, brother-in-law perhaps, etc.

My Recommendation -
A) Do NOT say anything! Nothing good will come out of speaking up. What are the chances anyone else who knows her is going to happen upon the video?
B) Of course, once you decide to remain silent, you can never admit knowing of its existence should it actually come to light. If you do, you would most likely get in trouble for not informing her when you first knew about it.
C) Enjoy (occasionally) the video and having the knowledge that you know she has a somewhat adventurous sexual attitude and does masturbate even though she would probably deny it if asked.

Question: This issue was raised a long time ago and recently resurfaced.
What did you decide/do?????

 

[ukmummylover]

Having had a friend in this position she wanted to know so she could have it removed before her husband found it or worse her professional life merged with her personal life.
so take a copy of the video and then tell her!!