How Do I Fullfill This Fantasy?

[justagoodolboy]

I'm a married man and my sex life is just fine BUT....I have a fantasy that I really need to fullfill. The thought of my wife fucking a very well endowed man turns me on something bad! My cock pleases her just fine but something noticeably bigger is what I'm talking about. I would love her to take a very large cock. The thought drives me crazy. Only thing is, I sure the hell don't want her to sleep with another man. I really don't think an oversized dildo/vibrator would do the trick? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. This is something that has to happen.

 

[Cattypuss]

If you don't want her to have sex with another man, then surely your ONLY option is an oversized dildo?

My last long-term partner used to love using an oversized dildo on me. Would start by fucking me with his cock and then, when I was all "warmed up", he'd slowly push the dildo in and start fucking me with it.

We both loved it.

 

[silverwhisper]

out of curiosity, if you really want to live out this fantasy in any way whatsoever (ditto what cattypuss said, incidentally), you're going to have to discuss it with her. what's she think of this idea?

ed

 

[bailadora]

This is something that has to happen.

As your wife would be the one on the receiving end of said large item, have you asked what HER thoughts are on this matter? Just cause this is something YOU want doesn't necessarily mean she feels the same way.

Your best bet would be to discuss your fantasy with her to find out if she's game. People here can make all sorts of suggestions, but if she's not interested you are going to look mighty foolish springing something like this on her out of the blue.

 

[bailadora]

out of curiosity, if you really want to live out this fantasy in any way whatsoever (ditto what cattypuss said, incidentally), you're going to have to discuss it with her. what's she think of this idea?

ed

LOL, Ed - looks like we are on the same wavelength!

 

[Eilan]

Only thing is, I sure the hell don't want her to sleep with another man.

Doesn't seem like there would have to be any sleeping involved.

My husband has/has had similar fantasies, so as someone who has been there and done that, both with other partners and toys, I'm just going to echo that I pretty much agree with what's already been said, since I've shared more info in other threads and don't feel like rehashing it here.

 

[silverwhisper]

bailadora: then i consider myself to be in good company. :>

ed

 

[silvastormcloud]

But sometimes having a fantasy doesnt mean its something we will ever do. Sometimes things like this are best played out in our minds

 

[sutherngent985]

I'm a married man and my sex life is just fine BUT....I have a fantasy that I really need to fullfill. The thought of my wife fucking a very well endowed man turns me on something bad! My cock pleases her just fine but something noticeably bigger is what I'm talking about. I would love her to take a very large cock. The thought drives me crazy. Only thing is, I sure the hell don't want her to sleep with another man. I really don't think an oversized dildo/vibrator would do the trick? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. This is something that has to happen.

Sorry bud but this DOES NOT HAVE to happen. The only things in life that have to happen are dying and paying taxes. You may WANT it to happen but thats different. You seem to forget that your wife is a human being and not just there to fulfill your fantasies. That said you really really need to talk this over with her. Tell her you will make a deal with her...whatever size dildo you want her to use you will use on yourself first while she watches. Or, if she does go with another partner, he can fuck you first.

 

[Cattypuss]

Nicely put lol

 

[Nitely]

Sorry bud but this DOES NOT HAVE to happen. The only things in life that have to happen are dying and paying taxes. You may WANT it to happen but thats different. You seem to forget that your wife is a human being and not just there to fulfill your fantasies. That said you really really need to talk this over with her. Tell her you will make a deal with her...whatever size dildo you want her to use you will use on yourself first while she watches. Or, if she does go with another partner, he can fuck you first.

Case closed! LOL!

 

[infinity706]

Case closed! LOL!

Case closed? So, what about those of us that like dildos and guys? I've even used one about as thick as my arm a couple times.

 

[AgonySceneGirl]

Sorry bud but this DOES NOT HAVE to happen. The only things in life that have to happen are dying and paying taxes. You may WANT it to happen but thats different. You seem to forget that your wife is a human being and not just there to fulfill your fantasies. That said you really really need to talk this over with her. Tell her you will make a deal with her...whatever size dildo you want her to use you will use on yourself first while she watches. Or, if she does go with another partner, he can fuck you first.

HAHAHAHAHA
very nicely put!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love you man lol

 

[justagoodolboy]

Sorry bud but this DOES NOT HAVE to happen. The only things in life that have to happen are dying and paying taxes. You may WANT it to happen but thats different. You seem to forget that your wife is a human being and not just there to fulfill your fantasies. That said you really really need to talk this over with her. Tell her you will make a deal with her...whatever size dildo you want her to use you will use on yourself first while she watches. Or, if she does go with another partner, he can fuck you first.

Shame on me for asking a 'SEX' related question on a 'SEX RELATED' forum.

I guess you didn't notice the smiley at the end of that statement on my post? It kind of looked a little something like this? You sound a little up tight. Let me make you a deal. How about I go to the nearest sex store down the road from me and find the biggest blackest dildo they got and give it to my mexican worker Rogelio. He'll come pay you a visit, put lipstick on you and make you his bitch and make you squeal like a pig. Deal? Oh, there's that smiley...try not to overlook again.

 

[silverwhisper]

i and several others asked if you discussed it with her & what she thought of the idea. you ignored the questions & instead chose to become an example of how not to get useful responses to your questions ever. way to go, sport.

shame on you, yes: for not understanding that sex is part of your relationship with your wife.

ed

 

[subwannabe]

What answer did you want? You say this has to happen but you don't want her to fuck another man and you apparently are against the dildo idea, so, I ask again, what answer did you want? I think it was an extremely legitimate question to ask you what her thoughts were on the subject, or do you really give a shit what she thinks?

 

[justagoodolboy]

I've been happily married for 12 years and so has my wife. With that said, If I didn't care about what my wife thought or what I thought about her feelings in general then SHE WOULD NOT BE HAPPY WITH ME, don't you think? For someone on here to get personal with me and say I should take one up the ass first because I don't care about her feelings is down right ignorant and childish. Have I talked with my wife about this before? Sure the hell have but it always gets pushed back and never taken too serious. She kind of laughs it off and doesn't take me serious. She doesn't get pissed when I bring it up which makes me think she wouldn't mind...which really enhances my drive to push this further. I don't push the issue because I don't want to scare her off? You would think being married for 12 years that I should have her figured out huh? So if y'all would, stop with the stupid ass assumption type remarks...very childish. I'm just trying to figure out the next step I should take.

 

[silverwhisper]

nobody knows dick about you or your relationship with your wife except for what you say--b/c nobody here knows you. if you go on to ignore those questions and respond only to one of almost a dozen responses, that is going to engender a response like this.

you're clearly new to discussion forums. i hope you have better luck in your future discussions.



so: your situation is you don't think she's necessarily against it. you know you don't actually want another guy there but at the same time, a toy isn't gonna do the trick.

i'm just curious: when you're imagining how this would play out, what are you visualizing? b/c i don't see any other way for this to work, to be honest.

ed

 

[SweetErika]

I've been happily married for 12 years and so has my wife. With that said, If I didn't care about what my wife thought or what I thought about her feelings in general then SHE WOULD NOT BE HAPPY WITH ME, don't you think? For someone on here to get personal with me and say I should take one up the ass first because I don't care about her feelings is down right ignorant and childish. Have I talked with my wife about this before? Sure the hell have but it always gets pushed back and never taken too serious. She kind of laughs it off and doesn't take me serious. She doesn't get pissed when I bring it up which makes me think she wouldn't mind...which really enhances my drive to push this further. I don't push the issue because I don't want to scare her off? You would think being married for 12 years that I should have her figured out huh? So if y'all would, stop with the stupid ass assumption type remarks...very childish. I'm just trying to figure out the next step I should take.

If she laughs and pushes it off, she's probably not enthusiastic about the idea. Enthusiasm sounds more like, "I'm up for that!" or, "It's an interesting idea," or at least, "Let me think about this and get back to you." People usually laugh something off and try to gloss over it because they want to avoid the issue, not because they're interested and want it to be pushed further.

Did you propose the large toy, or the sex with another man idea, or both to her? Have you asked her if she laughs it off when you bring it up because she's uncomfortable, and if so, what her concerns are? That is, have you tried really talking with her about it and just listening to her thoughts/feelings, letting those sink in and then asking if she'd be willing to just talk about it at a later time so you can understand her perspectives better?

 

[Zoots_owner]

What Erika said.

Also, I'd add that kink is more enjoyable as a process than a destination.

Would you rather screw for 30 minutes or for 30 seconds? (I hope, for your wife's sake, that you picked "minutes.")

This isn't something to get over with, like ripping off a bandage. Take a slow drive down the scenic route. Has she even used a vibrator before? More normally proportioned toys? There are a lot of things you can try along the way, many of which might interest her right now. Maybe, before long, she'll warm up to your idea. Maybe she won't. But, either way, you'll have a lot of fun in the process.

So relax, communicate, and have a good time.

 

[PhilGarlic]

Sure the hell have but it always gets pushed back and never taken too serious.[/SIZE] She kind of laughs it off and doesn't take me serious.

I guess this tells you what you need to know!

 

[subwannabe]

Allright, I'm going to take another stab at this without attacking you or making you feel like a shit. I'm going to be serious. You only have one solution to the problem:

Talk to her and communicate your true feelings about this. Don't let her brush it off or laugh it off. Corner her for an answer while at the same time letting her know how you feel about this and letting her know that she can just tell you no if she wants to and you will accept that and never bring it up again. This is really the only honest way to go instead of plotting some careful plans to eventually entice her into it. My guess is she doesn't want to do it but is afraid to tell you a flat out no, so she laughs it off. You are interpreting this as a maybe. If you decide to plot and pressure her into it, even if she eventually agrees, this will definetly be one of those cases of "BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR". You WILL regret it.

 

[DWW]

Serious answer attempt - to justa...

I am very rarely a poster here - but you did get some weird replies and this is also a fantasy I have some experience with.

First, let's assume for the sake of this reply that your wife might be wiling to go along with your fatasy of screwing another man in front of you - a very big assumption most likely. However, this is a moot point because if you have ANY reservations about incorporating a third person into your sex life with your wife - then don't try it. If you think you have second thoughts now - wait until you are in the middle of it. I thought I was OK with it and we were even into swinging at the time (pre-HIV) and my wife wanted to try it for both of us. I know others with swinging experience have had good MMF three-some experiences, but it did not work that well for either of us really.

(Try watching some porn sometime when you are not all that horny and imagine you are watching your wife - especially try the really cheesy "Please Screw My Wife" vids and imagine you are watching - and not participating. Yes - this is sort of worst-case scenario because these vids are really crappy porn but it will give you a sense for how really unsexy these situations can become.)

On the other hand, we occasionally have a lot of fun acting out a fantasy - and we both get enjoyment out of it. Your wife does need to be willing, interested and game to try something different - but perhaps explaining to her that this could be a relationship building and enhancing experience because you are really letting her into your deepest fantasies. You need to think of it that way and see if from her point of view - if it comes off as a fantasy you want to act out because you are bored with her and your sex life, she isn't going to react very positively. If it comes across as something you are sharing together - acting out a fantansy that builds your sex-life together and hence your total relationship, she may be a lot more willing to give it shot as an interested partner who has some fun too.

A previous poster wrote something about the journey being more important than the goal when it comes to acting out a fantasy and that is very true. There are a bunch of stories on this site that could be used to give you ideas about how to use a dildo, a vibrator and some fake cum to create a fantasy. (BTW - we have found the fake cum recipies that use corn starch to be too drying. We simply use cheap water soluble lube from any drug store and add a little plain yogurt to give it some whitish color.) Our most recent fantasy has been that my wife is a slut at a swinging party and comes into our bedroom with plenty of fake cum in her pussy, on her tits and even some around her face and hair from the "gang-bang". Some times I have watched while she uses the dildo - but she actually prefers to have me use the vibrator and dildo on her sometimes even while she is tied up. After all that, she is obviously too worn out to have me fuck her right away so she gets a full hour of cuddling and kissing while we both get a nice safe fantasy - especially me because I have a horny wife full of cum cuddling with me. We have been doing this sort of fantasy in many different variatons a few times a year for quite a while now - we are in our 50s and married over 25 years.

Good luck,

DWW

 

[DWW]

Additional info

Per my comment about MMF threesomes - here is a reply to a post on 11/20 from someone with a similar MMF threesome experience to mine posting a reply to a woman who wanted advice on a threesome with her husband:

I too want to draw attention to the risk of jealousy. you and your husband should be very secure in your relationship. will he be OK with you calling out another man's name?

my very first threesome involved the woman i was with at the time and a good friend of mine. afterwards, i was angry & hurt b/c while i did want that experience (it was my idea), jealousy reared its ugly head thereafter, leading to a fracture in my friendship.

i've had others since, but please consider this carefully.

ed

As we used to say in my old neigborhood "Truer words were never spoken"

 

[Noira]

Strapon. Pillow. Huge dildo! Poof! You can get body pillows from Japan that look like anime characters, would that work? Or maybe a blow up male doll, do they make those? I know they make male versions of the real dolls, but those are expeeeensive.

I think if you don't want her with another man, your only option is an oversized dildo, mate, or some other form of sex toy. And that's only if she wants it. Some things are better left as fantasies.