How many M & F just putting up with marriage?

[kcbigkid]

Re: Other Ladies in San Antonio

Nicetry, Where did you find your friend to have fun with. I have tried some of the single sites but that pretty hard.

So how have you found them. I would love to find a lady in the same situation that I'm in..........

My marriage has been without intimacy for 3 years, but I have had wonderful, caring, intensely sexual relationships to fill the void. Who are the Texas ladies I love outside of my marriage? They are women who are similiarly trapped and frustrated in their own marriages. Men and women alike suffer from being tied to cold spouses.

 

[illinois_guy2]

I just today found this thread, but it sure does describe my situation. I saw some of the other posts describing the downside of getting a divorce, and I sure understand. I also saw some posts of people who found partners outside their marriage and seem happy with that. I think I would like to find a situation like that, but it's hard to go out looking when you got a wife at home. Maybe we should start a "Married - but looking" thread where married people post their personnel ad.

Any ladies (particularly in the Chicago area, but even in some other areas is ok since I travel a bit on business) that are in a similar situation?

 

[DesertWind]

I rarely respond to postings here. But this one struck me. I was shocked by how many people responded, and how heartfelt they were. I thought it was a rare condition.

I got married when I was a teenager and have been married ever since. Working on 30 years. Most of it pretty terrible. My wife is not a bad person ... just a total mismatch. We got married because she was preg ... not my child ... but I hated to see the baby go fatherless. Not the best idea.

I tend to be emotional ... with tendency toward poetry and sunsets. (I have written several stories here under the name Shane Grey.) She is dominate and interested primarily in "success" and money. I am not a wimp. I grew up as a cowboy on a ranch .. and later worked as a cop in the projects. But, in the end, I get in trouble a lot for being "too nice". She views it as weakness. I view her reactions as being selfish and shallow.

Why stay together? In her case it is easy. I managed to end up in an executive position and so I make quite a bit of money. I my case it is harder .... At first I felt sorry for her, then there were the kids, after that there is just the inertia of so many years.
And the older you get the harder it is.

Only over the last few years she has become an alcoholic ... so I guess it is time to call it a day.

I wonder how many people who are married would really, honestly, do it all over again if they had the chance. I always imagined marriage as the height of romance and relationship. Two people caring and sharing and growing into one. I have actually seen that happen a few times, but the truth is that it seems to be very rare. Too sad that such is the case.

 

[SpankMyMonkey]

My two cents worth

I have been in a marriage for five long years. We have a child together who is the love of my life. When we dated my wife was everything I ever wanted in a women. The day we got married all things changed. Sex whittled to a trickle in the proverbial stream. I still wonder how we got prego. (He is mine I know that). My wife has desertion issues and has admitted it to me. We have gone into counseling that does not work. She gained 50 lbs after our son so that adds a self-esteem issue to the desertion issue. To make matters worse my wife holds all the cards. I have looked into divorce several times but I cannot do it. It is not because of the money cause I really don't care about that. It is that fact that she has the trump card to keep my child for ever seeing me again. She knows this. I know this. She uses it to her advantage. So while some of you choose not to leave, I cannot. I am a prisoner in my own stupidity.

At one point in time in my life I had passion. I was a semi-success artist. I have given it all up. My son keeps me here.

I know, you are thinking 'Wow what a pathetic loser' and you are right.

Folks....leave if you can. Living in a prison of your own construction is hell.

Spank

 

[crazybbwgirl]

Man- this is getting depressing as hell. So many of you out there feeling trapped in a lifeless marriage. Spank - are you sure she could keep you from seeing your son? Its pretty hard to do. Desert - run - free yourself - its not too late to have fun. Every one makes mistakes - but nobody should have to pay for it by living in a prison the rest of their lives.

 

[SpankMyMonkey]

I have tried. Yes she can. I have been told by two lawyers she could (If she wanted to be evil) keep him, well more keep me away from him.
:-(

Spank

 

[crazybbwgirl]

Well darling - that sucks bad. But once they're about 14 or so a child can decide for himself. I don't know if that makes you feel better or worse. But coming from a violent, awful marriage myself (single and happy for 19 years now!) I always support anyone who wants to improve their life. Good luck to you.