How to lose virginity...?

[Mac98]

You're 19... a virgin... apparently not unnattractive...

I'm sorry to say this, but you are perhaps most men's, if not every man's fantasy.

I'm approximately your age and the only sex I've had was with a friend that I, to this day, regret doing it with. She was nice, but it ruined everything. And I wish I'd have waited and had sex with someone I was truely in love with.

My advice: Call me! (kidding). Seriously, I suggest you just be patient and stop thinking about it so much. And don't get into the desperate stage where you say "fuck it" and decide to bang the first guy you meet. I say hold on, because not only is the first time supposed to be special, most people (if not all) are very nervous... and there's nothing worse than being nervous on a special night with a drunk frat boy who'll probably spray in your eyes and never call you again and brag to his friends how he tapped your ass. Not neccessarily a pleasant idea.

Patience is key. Stop over-thinking it. If you're THAT horny, the mind is a powerful thing. Use that to your advantage.

 

[Kitkat103]

You're 19... a virgin... apparently not unnattractive...

I'm sorry to say this, but you are perhaps most men's, if not every man's fantasy.

I'm approximately your age and the only sex I've had was with a friend that I, to this day, regret doing it with. She was nice, but it ruined everything. And I wish I'd have waited and had sex with someone I was truely in love with.

My advice: Call me! (kidding). Seriously, I suggest you just be patient and stop thinking about it so much. And don't get into the desperate stage where you say "fuck it" and decide to bang the first guy you meet. I say hold on, because not only is the first time supposed to be special, most people (if not all) are very nervous... and there's nothing worse than being nervous on a special night with a drunk frat boy who'll probably spray in your eyes and never call you again and brag to his friends how he tapped your ass. Not neccessarily a pleasant idea.

Patience is key. Stop over-thinking it. If you're THAT horny, the mind is a powerful thing. Use that to your advantage.

Thats exactly what I was trying to say! I have heard from my own sister when she slept with a guy and they broke up almost immediately and it wasnt that good. At least just wait for a guy that you feel that makes you comfortable and you are ready to engage in.

 

[subwannabe]

It would be interesting to hear from women how many had a good experience their first time. I have heard so many who either had a bad experience or that the experience was disappointing. KitKat had an excellent point I have always wondered about. Where is the sex education from parents or schools telling young people that masturbation is ok and a great way to relieve stress without having to have sex with a person? It seems like adults who talk about sex would rather talk about, well, sex - and masturbation is either forgotten about or taboo for some reason. We should be encouraging kids to masturbate.

 

[infinity706]

Yeah, but masturbation is the greatest sin ever. It causes blindness, hairy palms, and all kinds of other shit. Plus, parents don't like to think that kids have sex drives at all. (unborn fetuses have been caught on internal camera in a lab, masturbating to orgasm)

 

[subwannabe]

Oh my gosh! I didn't know it caused hairy palms.

 

[dkili]

hi

I think it's very simple to loose virginity

 

[Hoardingenergy]

It might be nice to have sex the first time with someone that is a friend that you can trust. A lot of young guys don't have a clue with how to please a woman, get someone with a few years under them. Also practice safe sex always! The guys that talk up their sexual exploits the most are probably not very good. You are still very young, but if its time to start then go for it.

 

[curiouslady91]

I'm the exact same age as you, and in the same boat too.

But I'm not looking to have sex so soon. Maybe it's an Asian thing; conservative views and all that..
Much as I'd love talking about sex, reading stories, masturbating etc, I don't think I'm ready to do it in real life. Guess that's where I'm different from you.

19 is still young, and I don't find it wrong to be a virgin at 19. To me, it's a special thing and not something to be given away because of loneliness or desperation.
Take things slow, and maybe the right opportunity will come.

Good luck!

 

[Adakgirl]

All of the above advice and
Do not fool yourself by equating your womanhood nor your worthiness as a person... with having sex and certainly do not confuse your continued virginity... with being unwanted. Just cuz a guy wants to fuck you does not mean he wants you. Just means he wants to fuck you. BIG DIFF, that's something very important you need to get straightened out in your head, before you actually do get fucked in the first place.

 

[Mel_the_redhead]

You aren't alone

I'm in your boat, but 23. I'm glad I didn't sleep around in college, and usually glad I'm a virgin. People didn't pester me about it, and usually were respectful. They didn't look down on me because of being a virgin. So just know that you aren't alone. From my friends experiences, I know that "getting it over with" (your first time) can lead to depression and negatively influence your relationship choices later.

I also have the urge sometimes to go pick up a guy or whatever. I remind myself that it's natural. Hormones are a big deal!! I also know that at a certain point in the month I get more horny than normal. Literotica and masturbation help take the edge off for me.

Whatever you decide, don't be rash. Think it through. Imagine scenarios and complications that may or may not happen the morning after, the day after, or the month after. Make sure you have a friend who you will feel comfortable talking about it with afterward.

I'm still waiting for the right guy, you can too!

 

[kittyn_]

I do socialize, a lot actually. Most of my friends are guys, and so I think I'm accustomed to being friendly...? I don't know, haha.

Random statement based on this: If your friends are male, and see you as a friend, then they won't touch you. At least not without some serious, slapping over the head 'Wake up idiot!' type of thing going on. I'm a rather geeky female, and since my interests lie within a 'male' domain, most of my friends have always been male. As perfect as it seems, it just doesn't work, or at least not easily.

If you're 'one of the guys' the guys don't want the story getting back to their friends from you if something doesn't go as planned. He doesn't have the nice cop out "Oh, well, we decided we weren't going for it just yet.." if his (and your) buddies already heard that he couldn't get it up, came before he got it in, or any number of the other possible sex fiascoes that happen.

Or at least that's how my group has always played out. You just don't do it, even if you already have available males dropping from the sky, if they are friends, they normally don't want to screw anything up.

If it is one of those guy friends that you're after, invite him out to do something without the rest of the group. You don't have to set it up as a date or anything if that makes you uncomfortable, just something to show him that you're interested in him, and that you're not just one of the guys, or so-and-so's ex, etc. If it goes well, he should get the idea before long.

Possibly the longest post in history to explain a simple idea, but I'm wordy, sorry

 

[infinity706]

It doesn't really apply to all guys, though. I'm a guy and I don't mind fucking my female friends, as long as I think they can handle it. Of course, I might be the exception.

 

[kittyn_]

It doesn't really apply to all guys, though. I'm a guy and I don't mind fucking my female friends, as long as I think they can handle it. Of course, I might be the exception.

true, true. May also just apply to my guys, I dunno. That's just always how it has played out. If I get to the 'friend' point with a male, it takes hell and high water to get them to see me as a chick/fair game again. Kinda weird, I've always thought, since I'm not exactly a tomboy or anything. Ah well, maybe your guys are more like Infinity, I'd sure as hell have appreciated a male friend who'd see me as a sexual being upon occasion

 

[BrazenFellow]

Agreed, Kittyn and Infinity. However, a lot of guys - moreso than women, in my experience and from what I see written about it here, there, everywheres else - have more difficulty separating sex from emotions than women. Which runs counter to the stereotype, but is why there are so few (unless, sadly, I'm missing something) relationships like Kittyn desires; platonic friends who can use their female friends to get off, on occassion, and of course return the favour.

 

[kittyn_]

I just attributed it to the two things I know affect pretty well every male I've encountered, insecurity (the 'real' story if something doesn't work right) and jealousy when you start to think about the fact that if I'm willing to do this with you, who else is there/could there be. Dunno, just know it's a damned tricky situation.

 

[Firebrain]

If your friends are male, and see you as a friend, then they won't touch you.

That is a big pile of duck rape. Seriously - why do you think guys like female friends? Not that all men want is a fuck over a friend, but really - I bet they'd fuck you. That has always been my experience with being the girl in a group of guy friends; a lot of them will fixate on the girl and given the opportunity, they wouldn't worry about a little thing like screwing up a friendship They might well want a relationship, what with you already being friends, but then that's no bad thing.

 

[TheRapeTree]

I know a couple of good ways to lose your virginity:

Sell it on ebay.
Rohypnol yourself before a party (that's always a winner).
Go for a walk alone in a deep, dark wood...

 

[TypicalDeviant]

I know a couple of good ways to lose your virginity:

Sell it on ebay.
Rohypnol yourself before a party (that's always a winner).
Go for a walk alone in a deep, dark wood...

Or, maybe just hang out with you, O wise RapebTree?

 

[infinity706]

That is a big pile of duck rape. Seriously - why do you think guys like female friends? Not that all men want is a fuck over a friend, but really - I bet they'd fuck you. That has always been my experience with being the girl in a group of guy friends; a lot of them will fixate on the girl and given the opportunity, they wouldn't worry about a little thing like screwing up a friendship They might well want a relationship, what with you already being friends, but then that's no bad thing.

I wouldn't go that far, either. I've taken a great amount of effort to not fuck up any friendships. Sure, I like to fuck a lot of people, but I wouldn't mind being friends afterward, as well.

 

[kittyn_]

So, we've come to the conclusion that it depends on the guy friends involved, which is why I said "Or at least that's how my group has always played out." Yup, it can be done, has been done, but it had to be me as the agressor because they wouldn't risk stepping over any boundaries.

That's all I was saying to start with. If the person she's after is a male friend, there's a decent chance she'll have to start it, or break out some serious hinting that she's open to the idea.

 

[squarejohn]

I am still a virgin, which is quite upsetting to me. I cannot come up with a viable reason why I am still a virgin, either. I don't find myself unattractive, I think I have an ok personality, and I am not a 'prude' by any stretch of the imagination. I just seem to get stuck as the friend and not the girlfriend(or the fuck buddy, for that matter) I also don't think I give off that desperate vibe, but it's getting ridiculous. Any ideas how I could remedy this situation?
PS. I'm a 19 year old female.

We men are very simple creatures. Just pick out a guy who looks good to you, put your hand on his crotch and tell him you want his cock.

 

[infinity706]

We men are very simple creatures. Just pick out a guy who looks good to you, put your hand on his crotch and tell him you want his cock.

Well, it depends on the guy, once again. While it would very likely get me to put out, I know quite a few guys that would be offended. It's just like emap says, "not all cheerleaders a sluts." Of course, it this case, replace cheerleaders with guys. There's also plenty of guys that aren't really worth fucking.

 

[TreCool]

I am still a virgin, which is quite upsetting to me. I cannot come up with a viable reason why I am still a virgin, either. I don't find myself unattractive, I think I have an ok personality, and I am not a 'prude' by any stretch of the imagination. I just seem to get stuck as the friend and not the girlfriend(or the fuck buddy, for that matter) I also don't think I give off that desperate vibe, but it's getting ridiculous. Any ideas how I could remedy this situation?
PS. I'm a 19 year old female.

You could always express yourself on here and explore your desires. Post a picture, I'm sure more than one guy would be willing to take a trip.