how to take a man fully?

[YMS]

Hello everyone,

This is a really great forum and i have already found lots of interesting and useful stuff... I have a little quesiton though...

When i have sex with my man, everything is great until he starts pushing too deep inside me... It actually hurts and i can even bleed a little! I very much want him to enjoy it as much as i do, but he needs to go deeper... What can i do about it? Am i too small for him, or maybe there are some health issues that don't let me take him fully, or maybe i am simply not relaxed enough? I do want to get checked by a gyno anyway, but maybe anyone has something to advise me? I would really appreciate it, because it is really upsetting when you cannot be with man you want more than anything in the world because of some stupid pain! :-(

Thanks!

 

[phoenix1224]

I'm not a woman, but...

It sounds to me as if he's hitting your cervix.

Seeing since there is no way to lengthen your vagina, the only thing that I can recommend is that you tell your guy to show a little restraint and try to not thrust so deep inside you.

If he has trouble doing that, there are some adult websites that sell an aparatus that will help prevent him from going that deep... It looks like a doughnut... He just slides it down his penis all the way down to the base.

 

[Cakegirl]

I'd also recommend trying different positions - there might be some that have a different angle, and don't result in cervix bashing.

 

[YMS]

Thank you for the answers...

Maybe there are ways to stretch the vagina? My boyfriend does restrain himself, but i don't want him to... i guess it's not fun when you should always control yourself...

 

[ravenmx]

I have the same issue and have never found a way around it, Ive been to the DR and there is nothing wrong medically.

CakeGirl is correct in saying different positions might help (they do for me).

I have found that doggie style allows him to go deep and I don't feel any pain.

I have also found that me being on top works to. I am able to control how deep he goes, but depending on how you "sit" the pain is not their either.

Just two things that seem to help me.

 

[luv1]

I too was going to reconmend different positions, doggie I've heard is good, how about you lay face down with a pillow under your belly to push your bum up as this will give him your cheeks to cushion his thrusts and the added advantage of bum cleavage to rub against...tho you'll have to ask the women if that works...as a man I wouldn't know such things....Tho I used to go out with a women who had a strap on......*drifts off into memorys* **cough** anyway.

 

[Eilan]

It sounds to me as if he's hitting your cervix.

This is what I was thinking.

I'd also recommend trying different positions - there might be some that have a different angle, and don't result in cervix bashing.

What Cakegirl said. My cervix tends to be very sensitive during the first half of my cycle. What works for us is a position where I'm on my side in a spooning position but my husband is upright (if that makes sense). He can go deep and it's not at all uncomfortable for me.

Maybe there are ways to stretch the vagina?

The vagina's pretty elastic; inserting a tampon can be a tight fit, yet it expands to allow a baby to pass through. If it's a depth issue, you probably won't be able to do much about it. I don't know about stretching it, though.

 

[Qina]

I have that problem but only when I'm full. Try going to the bathroom first and not having a big meal right before.

 

[YMS]

Thank you all, girls (and guys)! It already feels a little easier knowing i am not the only one and that people can live with it!

Eilan, your position description makes sense, thank you, we will try it!

 

[BustyJ]

Thank you all, girls (and guys)! It already feels a little easier knowing i am not the only one and that people can live with it!

Eilan, your position description makes sense, thank you, we will try it!

Also try riding him, then you can control the depth. But doggie usually seems that he can hit it home, so to speak, and be as deep as he wants.

 

[Brinnie]

I wanna know two.

 

[therockap1]

definitly different positions will hurt less. Switch it up and see which one feels best

 

[four]

in my experiance if im on top and she has her legs raised, knees to her chest, then i can go so deep i could hurt them. however other positions dont allow this type of penetration. try doggy style or her on top facing you, or facing away from you.

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

I've got this problem as well.

My boyfriend has a biggish cock and I'm smallish.

Some positions feel great and he can go all the way in... others hurt to hell.

Funnily enough, doggystyle is one of the positions that hurt me.

 

[YMS]

I've got this problem as well.

My boyfriend has a biggish cock and I'm smallish.

Some positions feel great and he can go all the way in... others hurt to hell.

Funnily enough, doggystyle is one of the positions that hurt me.

Yes, i'm similar! It hurts in the doggie position when he tries to go deeper.
Can you please describe the positions that dont hurt you and where he can go in fully?

 

[lizaveta]

Yes, this is definitely your cervix. Different positions absolutely can help, but also know that your cervix is "lowest" at the beginning and end of your cycle, and "highest" in the middle (when you're ovulating, which is probably JUST what you want to be thinking about at that point, but there ya go).

Here's some serious TMI for those not faint of heart... If you squat down and feel "up" with your finger you can tell how high or low your cervix is that day, and maneuver your partner into position accordingly. (Your cervix will feel like the end of a hot dog. Yet another thing you never wanted to know.)

Hope this helps!
L

 

[YMS]

Lizaveta, thanks!

A question for guys: if this was the situation with a girl you're dating, say you like her and are attracted to her, but there's no big feeling yet, what would you do? I mean the situation when while making love to her you can't really go deep enough for you, and when you try she screams with pain?

 

[longtimerod]

If I were in that situation, I would be gentle with her.

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

Yes, i'm similar! It hurts in the doggie position when he tries to go deeper.
Can you please describe the positions that dont hurt you and where he can go in fully?

Me on top is good... but more for him than me.
Spooning position works well, with him holding one of my legs up.
Doggystyle only works if he is standing up, and I am on my knees on the edge of the bed, or both of us standing up (with me slightly bent over) is good too.

 

[In Anticipation]

If I were in that situation, I would be gentle with her.

Yeah, we do gentle but once things get going neither of us wants to hold back so all is forgotten. Spooning from behind is good but probably more because it feels deep for me but isn't really so deep for her (her top leg bent up in that position.) However, for her it's more an internal ache the day after. Anyone else?

 

[YMS]

Yeah, we do gentle but once things get going neither of us wants to hold back so all is forgotten. Spooning from behind is good but probably more because it feels deep for me but isn't really so deep for her (her top leg bent up in that position.) However, for her it's more an internal ache the day after. Anyone else?

That's what i meant, he is always gentle with me, but what fun is it if you have to always control yourself? As you said, neither him nor me, we dont want any of us to hold back, i want him to relax and just go... same for myself...
So far i don't care for pains the day after, as long as all my guts are safe! But also the thing is, i can bleed a little, so it's not all about the pain. Does anyone know, can the bleeding be connected with him hitting the cervix? Where can this blood come from?

Thanx for all the replies, anyway!

 

[In Anticipation]

That's what i meant, he is always gentle with me, but what fun is it if you have to always control yourself? As you said, neither him nor me, we dont want any of us to hold back, i want him to relax and just go... same for myself...
So far i don't care for pains the day after, as long as all my guts are safe! But also the thing is, i can bleed a little, so it's not all about the pain. Does anyone know, can the bleeding be connected with him hitting the cervix? Where can this blood come from?

Thanx for all the replies, anyway!

My understanding is that hitting the cervix is unbelievably painful . . . you wouldn't carry on doing that. The vaginal walls are soft and delicate though and slight bleeding might not be much to worry about. I'd recommend having more sex so you can see if you get accustomed to it over time. If it gets worse then you ought to consult your doctor.

 

[lizaveta]

Hitting the cervix can be very painful, or it can just be uncomfortable; it depends on the woman and on how hard it's being hit.

It can definitely become so irritated that it bleeds, so that probably is where the blood is coming from.

ETA: If you're worried, mention it to your doctor. She can certainly help you out! And don't be embarassed about it -- there is pretty much nothing you can say that will shock her.

 

[Hooper_X]

Go see your gynecologist. Off the cuff, it sounds like you may have one of the following medical conditions closely associated with post coital vaginal bleeding:

1. Cervical dysplasia
2. Chlamydia
3. Gonorrhea
4. Vaginitis/Cervicitis
5. Cervical polyps
6. Trichomoniasis
7. Vaginal Yeast Infection
8. Endometritis/adenomyosis
9. Uterine polyps
10. Fibroid tumors