I need an opinion please...

[Snowman5933]

I consider myself to be an average male (225 pounds, 5'11", 35 years old). I've been married to a wonderful woman for almost 14 years and sex is great (we enjoy each other very much). Sex usually starts with lots of foreplay and ends with a couple minutes of intercourse. In the last 2-3 weeks intercourse has begun to last longer, much longer, like 25 to 35 minutes at which point I give up from sheer exhaustion. I know that our bodies change as we age, but can it occurr so suddenly. When we have intercourse its like the head of my penis goes numb. What do you think?

 

[NippleMuncher]

It sounds to me as though stress or physical condition (or both) may be at fault. What's going in at work or in life in general that's different from a few weeks ago? How has your physical condition changed in the last few months?

You might consider a vacation, change of environment, or other difference in your life, even if only for a weekend get-away, and see how that affects things. My suspicion is that there is some little nagging thing going on that is stressing you out that is precipitating this change.

 

[MissLouBeLou]

I would agree with NippleMuncher and go for it being stress but there is a slim chance it could be caused by a vitamin or mineral deficency. Try eating a banana a day or taking a multivitamin. In general I have found if I have a healty lifestyle I have a healthy sex life.

 

[DrHappy]

I have some suggestions:

1. Make sure that you are fit and healthy. How fit are you? Are you getting enough sleep?
2. Don't be so goal oriented towards a vaginal orgasm. If you aren't getting the stimulation that you need after a few minutes of vaginal sex, then pull out and get finished off with a hand (either yours or hers). It will probably be easier on her too if you don't pound away for 30 minutes. There are lots of creative and fun ways to cum outside of a vagina. Also, I've heard over and over again that women like orgasms, but it's the intimacy that's most important.
3. Medications? Are you taking any anti-histamines, anti-depressants, or blood pressure medication? Some of these can cause inorgasmia.
4. Testosterone: If you are approaching 40, you might consider getting your levels checked. How is your sex drive? A deficiency may also make it harder to achieve orgasm.

 

[Snowman5933]

I have some suggestions:

1. Make sure that you are fit and healthy. How fit are you? Are you getting enough sleep?
2. Don't be so goal oriented towards a vaginal orgasm. If you aren't getting the stimulation that you need after a few minutes of vaginal sex, then pull out and get finished off with a hand (either yours or hers). It will probably be easier on her too if you don't pound away for 30 minutes. There are lots of creative and fun ways to cum outside of a vagina. Also, I've heard over and over again that women like orgasms, but it's the intimacy that's most important.
3. Medications? Are you taking any anti-histamines, anti-depressants, or blood pressure medication? Some of these can cause inorgasmia.
4. Testosterone: If you are approaching 40, you might consider getting your levels checked. How is your sex drive? A deficiency may also make it harder to achieve orgasm.

I had a very stressful office job which I quit about 4-5 weeks ago. I have started a new job which is very physical (I walk 6-7 miles per day), but basically has no stress. I go to bed about 9:00-9:30 p.m. and get up at 5:45 a.m.

We're not set on any particular type of orgasm, we just play and have a good time. Sometimes we both cum through PIV and sometimes through oral or mutual masturbation. It's no big deal to me. We used to enjoy the occasional quickie (sneaking off for 5 minutes of pleasure), but like I said that's all but impossible lately.

I am taking a new medication (klonipin) which I started about a week and a half ago for rls (restless leg syndrome).

And as far as my sex drive goes its still very high.

This is about as much as I know. If you have any ideas please let me know. Thanks for the responses.

 

[rthnck]

Personally my SO would never complain about increasing shag time from 5 minutes to 25 minutes

The male psyche can be pretty fragile and the other posters here are on the money that changes in lifestyle can play a big part in libido. And when things go wrong it almost always creates a negative feedback loop that only makes the problem worse. Can't get it up and you start thinking about it and you have almost no chance of fixing it. Can't cum like you used to and it's the same thing. You see all the time that when you're trying to get pregnant it won't happen till you go on vacation and relax and stop trying and suddenly you're knocked up.

If it's not a medical issue then relaxing and ignoring the issue often leads to a return to normal function. Changing things up can often put things back on track as well.

 

[Guest]

I consider myself to be an average male (225 pounds, 5'11", 35 years old). I've been married to a wonderful woman for almost 14 years and sex is great (we enjoy each other very much). Sex usually starts with lots of foreplay and ends with a couple minutes of intercourse. In the last 2-3 weeks intercourse has begun to last longer, much longer, like 25 to 35 minutes at which point I give up from sheer exhaustion. I know that our bodies change as we age, but can it occurr so suddenly. When we have intercourse its like the head of my penis goes numb. What do you think?

many things can contribute to this such as stress. you could always talk to your doctor.