ideas for romancing my wife

[BTK51]

WOOHOO!

And that is something I think is important. I believe kids should see their parents doing goofy romantic things on occasion or sharing little signs of affection. I think a lot of times we want to think the kids shouldn't be present, but who says you and your wife can't cuddle on the couch watching TV while the kids are sprawled on the floor? It shows them what a healthy relationship involves.

As I was reading your quote, I was thinking to write the same thing. We have done these things throughout our lives especially when we didn't have much money. We have always showed our affection and made mild sexual suggestions in front of our kids and it is healthy. I never saw that from my parents growing up (they felt that was private to be kept from children) even though I know that they were romantic.

Last Valentine's Day my 17-year old son planned a romantic dinner for his girlfriend over at his girlfriends house. Her parents were blown away at the extent that he went to (planning, shopping, marinating the meat 3 days ahead of time, the music, the desert etc.) for the things that she liked. There comment was "What 17-year old goes through that much effort? we thought that it was so thoughtful". To tell you the truth, my wife and I felt proud (pompous I know but it's how we felt).

The one commonality threw all the female suggestions on this thread is everyone of them is inexpensive. It just takes a little thought & effort. It's like Frommer's romancing your wife on $1 a day! Thanks everyone!

 

[BTK51]

The laundry thing may work out for you. Hopefully she'll say "you don't know what you're doing, I'll do it."

 

[wicked woman]

Originally posted by candyman33
Wicked....
We have been talking about it quite a bit lately. I work at home and she sees me all day, so i don't think she has affair concerns. I have told her recently that my feelings for her are getting stronger than they have ever been, but i need to put actions to my words that go beyond wanting have sex with her every waking moment of the day. That doesn't accomplish much when she has 4 kids and a home to take care of. I am trying to rechannel the energy if that makes sense.

BTW...hang dry was on the label.....dumbass lol

Perfect sense.

but i need to put actions to my words

Wise, very wise. I broke up with my last bf because his words were so sweet...but in the end his actions weren't sufficiiently sweet. Words are wonderful...they can melt us... but combined with actions they are unbeatable.

but i need to put actions to my words that go beyond wanting have sex with her every waking moment of the day.

You're getting wiser by the minute. I'm never going to say sex isn't wonderful..but as you're seeing we women appreciate our man's love expressed in 1,000 other ways as well.

So glad to hear things are working out so well for you.

Well with the exception of her top but hey!

 

[candyman33]

She just called to check in and i told her about the sweater. She laughed and thanked me for giving a reason to go to Kohl's so she could shop some more. You women have all the angles.

In anticipation that my hard work will pay off sometime soon, i did ask her to get some fresh pinapples and bananas at the store on her way home.....

 

[SexyChele]

In anticipation that my hard work will pay off sometime soon, i did ask her to get some fresh pinapples and bananas at the store on her way home.....

And my brain is wondering if she thinks you are on a health kick or if she knows the "true" reason!

 

[candyman33]

Chele...

She has no clue. We have been changing our eating habits recently, so it was an easy request without any questions. Hopefully, i will get to test the theory sooner than later. I love all this input. Hope i can return the favor some day.

 

[sheath]

Chele...

She has no clue. We have been changing our eating habits recently, so it was an easy request without any questions. Hopefully, i will get to test the theory sooner than later. I love all this input. Hope i can return the favor some day.

I've been watching this thread...it's so heartwarming to see a man going all out for his wife, doing all those romantic things with a vigor that says he REALLY loves her. You're awesome.

That thing about the tape that Chele mentioned? It works. Oh, wow, does it ever work! My man made a tape of him just driving in the car, talking into it while he was between errands. He told me little things that I never would have known otherwise, funny little things he saw on the road, his thoughts at that very moment. His voice is so soothing and loving. It made me feel SO close to him during those times when I wasn't with him. It is worth the time to make that tape!

Another suggestion about the notes...write up several one day while she is gone, and hide them. Little things like "I love the way your hair looks in the morning" or "When you smile, it takes my breath away". Then put them in places where even you won't remember them. In pockets, in the bottom of her cosmetic case, in between the envelopes of the stack of bills, in her glove compartment. And she will be surprised with them when both of you least expect it.

An old boyfriend of mine did this three years ago...he went through my personal things and inserted little love notes. That was THREE years ago, and even though he and I have moved on, I STILL find those notes in places that I haven't looked in a long time. So...it's the gift that keeps on giving, lol.

You're doing GREAT, candyman.

S.

 

[Bobmi357]

Re: Morning Update

Anyone know how to do laundry out there? That is alot of buttons on that machine.....very confusing

Those buttons really do something??? Geez, I've been throwing everything into the machine and turning the knob thingie... I never touched the buttons.

 

[candyman33]

Sheath.... you are kind, but this is something i should have done long ago. In reality, we men should never stop doing this. I have been so inspired by all the feedback and it has made me reflect on my relationship and where i would be without the strength my wife provides in my life. Women are so giving and ask for very little in return in relationships, and the least we can do is make sure the know how loved and valued they are in our lives. This is something that is striking me after 37 years of life. Kinda sad, but better late than never. When you clear out alot of clutter it is amazing what you can see.

I gather from your quotes you are a Nashvillian. I love that town. It has a special place in my life.

 

[sheath]

Sheath.... you are kind, but this is something i should have done long ago. In reality, we men should never stop doing this. I have been so inspired by all the feedback and it has made me reflect on my relationship and where i would be without the strength my wife provides in my life. Women are so giving and ask for very little in return in relationships, and the least we can do is make sure the know how loved and valued they are in our lives. This is something that is striking me after 37 years of life. Kinda sad, but better late than never. When you clear out alot of clutter it is amazing what you can see.

VERY well said.

I gather from your quotes you are a Nashvillian. I love that town. It has a special place in my life.

Yes, I live just outside of Nashville. It's a wonderful place...and I wouldn't trade it for the world. The Mississippi Delta runs a close second, though.

It's good to say hello to someone who loves this town!

S.

 

[Derya]

what a great thread and great suggestions....so nice to see such positive love and affirmation of feelings...reminds me of my parents maybe that's why after over 50 years of marriage they still kiss and hold hands in public and private...write each other notes... and Dad brings flowers home for no reason...I wish you the same continued blessings and many years of ever growing relationship success....

I don't really have a lot to add...agreed with so many of the suggestions....take time to talk, share and listen....this gets lost sometimes in our life as we rush about and sharing our intellects is incredibly romantic too.

 

[dizzy]

Great job candyman, two thumbs up for you! Here is an inexpensive romantic evening you can do that is amazing in its simplicity yet yields great results.

1. Make a cd with a bunch of slow dance songs, old favorites, whatever.
2. Scout out a piece of dark sky (for star gazing).
3. Check weather reports, make sure you'll have a good chance at clear night skies.
4. Take her out to dinner (Make sure you take a car with a cd player or a boombox with a cd player).
5. Goto your piece of dark sky and start looking at the stars.
6. When the time feels right put the cd in and ask her to dance.
7. Good Luck!

Dizzy

 

[candyman33]

Good Morning to all my love advisors.....

I am going out to buy tea lights today and am going to cover the master bath with them. After the kids go to bed, i will make a hot bath and for her and give her a hot oil foot massage. Working on a sitter for Saturday night, but have not figured out what to do yet. I'll let you know.

Now....last night she tells me that she made an appointment for me to get the big V finally. We have been talking about it for a year and i told her the final decision would be hers. I guess she made a decision yesterday. That is a good thing.....right?

 

[Wantonica]

Sounds to me like she had sex on her mind. After you have that done, you'll lose a lot of the worries about unplanned pregnancy and this should make things even more spontaneous and relaxed. To answer your question, if she is planning your future love-making capabilities, that is definitely a good thing.

Happy day,
Wantonica

 

[candyman33]

Wanton.....

I hope you are right. . 3 of our 4 were more or less unplanned, but they all have been major blessings from God. You hate to close that chapter but at the same time have to be realistic about your own capabilities. I think we are maxed right now and so that whole idea is probably more of a deterent than i think.

I'll keep on romancing and see where it gets us. I have so many fun deals to plan. I'm still taking ideas so don't be shy out there.

 

[candyman33]

Okay......so are we all out of ideas.

UPDATE:

We took a bath together and i gave the longest most thorough foot massage of my life. We talked for over an hour uninterrupted. That was awesome, but the water got a little cold. She had alot to say. Mostly about life after stopping having babies. I didn't realize how much fear she has of going into the new stage of life. It is amazing what you can learn by simply listen and not trying to solve anything to speed up the process. Women are thinkers and the conclusions they get to are usally much more sound than ours. It just takes them longer to get there.

Hope all are having a nice weekend. I have more questions to ask when the time is right.

Candyman

 

[wicked woman]

Candyman...looks like you may have learned something about us women. Where men tend to see a problem and want to jump to solve it...sometimes women just want you to listen to us...what we think...what we feel. We might ask your advice...but we'll make our own decisions. You're right. Amazing what you can learn when you listen.


So glad your efforts are getting positive results.

 

[candyman33]

Wicked....
The woman is a facinating creation beyond her incredible beauty. So much more complex and thoughtful than us men. Not that we don't have strengths of our own, but there is much to be learned from a female. It makes the raw beauty that much more irresitible. I am enjoying this quest, and have you and many others to thank for the challenges of steping into the world of a woman. Body is only one part of the encompassing beauty.

Now..... don't ever let my buddies know i just said that....lol

 

[wicked woman]

Originally posted by candyman33
Wicked.... Body is only one part of the encompassing beauty.

Now..... don't ever let my buddies know i just said that....lol

Candyman...mumms the word. Your reward for a lesson well learned.

 

[candyman33]

I posted this under the first time anal thread, but i wanted to copy it here for anyone still following this one.


"I have to jump in here because we just had our first experience. I guess all the romancing has paid off as my wife finally agreed to try it. Using lots of KY and moving incredibly slowly. So slowly. It hurt a bit at first, but that went away, and once i got in to certain point we hit something b/c she went from "it feels different" to "OH MY GOD i'm going to cum!!" in a matter of seconds. She loved it. I think she is still in a state of shock b/c she never thought she would like it. What a fun new option. I would like to learn a bit more about it as i know very little, but i am searching the site for more "how to" info. I want to handle this right so any of you females who would not mind giving me a few pointers, insights and sensitivities in the area, please PM me. Your advice has been invaluable thus far."

 

[Wantonica]

In this case, I won't even go private. My ex of 17 years was always trying to ram it in my ass. Only once did I like it. With my new man of 3 years, I was his first anal and we did it right. Lots of lube, slowly, and before you knew it I was begging for it. As you described, the anal orgasms are amazing ... they go and go. Best thing I've ever done. Now if he could just get over the stigma and get off while I'm going a mile a minute, it'd be lovely. Did you cum? The taboo shit seems to bug my man, although he loves to please me.

Smiles,
Wantonica

 

[SexyGiggles]

In this case, I won't even go private. My ex of 17 years was always trying to ram it in my ass. Only once did I like it. With my new man of 3 years, I was his first anal and we did it right. Lots of lube, slowly, and before you knew it I was begging for it. As you described, the anal orgasms are amazing ... they go and go. Best thing I've ever done.

I'll reiterate the above -- go slowly, use lots of lube, and above all, listen to what she says...since you're both still new to it, let her control the pace, the depth, the speed, until she's ready to let you control it...and check in with her, make sure she's okay, ask her how it feels....keep talking to her, letting her know you're there, supporting her...

Good luck!

 

[serebreal]

If you're looking for romantic ideas, let me point you at lovingyou.com

That website has TONS of ideas, presented in an easy format. Saved my butt plenty of times.

 

[candyman33]

Thanks Wanton and Giggles.....

Yes i did cum and it was great. The extra tightness made that easy. When she started to cum the second time, i simply lost it. I don't think i was even moving that much. I was so excited and aroused at how much she was enjoying it, that i started to cum. It has an intimacy level and a trust that expands the relationship. Can't really describe it, but i sure like how she looks at me when i walk around the house the last couple of days.

So here is where we guys really get stupid usually. Our wives or Sig Others open up as a result of the extra attention and romancing and we think our job is done and go back to being relationship lazy. I am realizing that romancing needs to be a life long commitment. If you give men and inch they take a mile, but if you give woman an inch they give a mile. Just an observation that i need to remind myself of.

CYA for now....

 

[candyman33]

Thanks, serebreal....... i'll check it out.