Is a tag enough or should you really put a warning?

[PennyThompson]

Cooking with Penny makes a great holiday gift. Pre-order now!

The recurring restaurant bits in Opposite of Jealousy were partly written with you in mind

 

[AG31]

I suspect that the majority of readers never look at tags.

Then it's on them if they get upset by some things in stories.

 

[theMasterBaiter]

Unless I'm going blind (possible) the tags don't show up in the classic view at the start of the story at all, nor in the listing, and even in the new mobile friendly "beta" view, they aren't visible unless you know to click their little icon. They are great for search, but not for warning readers.

I think a bit of a warning at the starts to scare off the kink averse is a good idea. Especially for the delicate "straight" guys who will down vote and even leave a nasty gram if two guys in a story happen to bump their junk or (gasp) pleasure each other in a story outside of the Gay Male category. In good keeping with bi erasure, there is (of course) no category for those of us with bats who swing for either team. Sigh.

Having grumped about that, I have my own kink aversion that I would love to be warned about: Feet. Feet turn a lot of people on, but they can totally droop my boner in an instant with just a passing mention. LOL. It would be nice to know that was coming. Shrug. We all have our issues I guess.

Another issue is writing a story series where each part fits in a different category. People want to read the next part, but miss that it just moved from "Loving Wives" to "Gay Male" and they lay an egg. Best to warn in the first installment if you know in advance. I'm sure that has cost me some rating juice over the years, on top of my unpopular kinks and mediocre writing.

In the end, good communication is critical. I mean, consent is king, but without good communication, how do you really know what you consented to read?

 

[AG31]

I only lately was made aware that lots of people are put off by M/M activity particularly when it is not Gay Male (submission involving straight male). Anyway, I'm going to slowly add M/M to my tag list. Even though I thought the blurbs pretty much told what's involved, apparently not.

But, as I said up thread, I'm a firm believer in putting responsibility for avoiding unpleasant or triggering content on the reader. If they didn't know about tags, complain on a forum and someone will tell them.

 

[TaniaTulle]

I use both tags and sometimes a preface if I feel it needs it. On my long running story I had a few hard moments for the character that fell into Non/Con and BDSM. But the story was still predominantly a Trans story, and that's the category it stayed in, so I felt I needed to warn the reader in case it wasn't their kink.

I've also used this as a catch up "Previously on..." and I've had a few people comment how helpful that is.

If the story is a one-off and fits the genre/catagory perfectly, then I may bother with any preface and dive right into the story.

Tags I mainly see as a way to help my story be found via search, rather than people checking it, but I may mention 'do check the tags' in the preface if there's something that is outside of the expected category.

I've written a lot of trans/CD stories, but recently I've switched to writing in other categories like E/C and I/T (no other reason than I just felt like it). Doing that has gained a lot of new followers, so I've always been a little worried one group of my readers might go into another one of my stories and be put off, or have a bad reaction. I'm happy to say this hasn't happened, in fact it's quite the opposite, I've had a few messages saying 'this isn't normally my thing, but I really enjoyed it'. So I think I was over worrying there.

The recipe idea is just genius.

 

[SinclairGroupLLP]

So I'm still figuring out etiquette when posting stories. Especially when it comes to how to tag them.

In a story where a male character cleans the male main characters cock with his mouth, or blows him, but everything else is sex between the MMC and a woman. Beyond that, there is no sexual contact between the men.

Had a comment on a story I just posted saying there should be a warning at the start of the story.

The story already has a "bisexual male" tag, is that sufficient, are there better tags for the above scenario, or is an actual warning at the top of the story needed?

I figured if someone objected to male/male contact of any kind, the bisexual male tag would be enough warning without giving away anything about the plot.

If it's in the tag, you've warned them.

Even in 2026, there are still people who can't handle any kind of same sex sexual conduct. Don't worry about those people - write for your audience and what you want to read. If they don't like the story, fine. Maybe they'll like the next one.

 

[old_prof]

Then it's on them if they get upset by some things in stories.

I was a reader for over two decades without realizing tags even existed. The site make them so obscure as to be nearly useless.

And why it this such a big issue for the author to provide? Again, why are so many people fixedly determined that spending a few seconds to make others's better is not a problem. Where did basic human decency go here?

If it's in the tag, you've warned them.

Not if they're unaware that tags exist. Why can't people understand not everyone knows what they know?

 

[crookedletter]

I was a reader for over two decades without realizing tags even existed. The site make them so obscure as to be nearly useless.

And why it this such a big issue for the author to provide? Again, why are so many people fixedly determined that spending a few seconds to make others's better is not a problem. Where did basic human decency go here?

I think an appeal to "basic human decency" is a bit of a stretch. Tags provide information for what a story contains. Readers are responsible for choosing what stories they would like to read. If they choose not to take a moment to avail themselves of all the information available to them, then they run the risk of choosing the wrong story.

Nobody gets hurt.

 

[old_prof]

I think an appeal to "basic human decency" is a bit of a stretch. Tags provide information for what a story contains. Readers are responsible for choosing what stories they would like to read. If they choose not to take a moment to avail themselves of all the information available to them, then they run the risk of choosing the wrong story.

Nobody gets hurt.

It's not the tag per se that is decency. It's the attitude that has seemed pervasive here in recent weeks that a few seconds of effort (in this case writing a warning) it an outrageous expectation to make life better for someone else.

And some things are very traumatizing to some people. Nothing that should be permitetted on the site would traumatize me particularly, but that does not mean I don't worry about other people who might be traumatized.

Despite protestations pope can get hurt. Psychological trauma is very real. Even if it's inconvenient to others.

 

[crookedletter]

It's not the tag per se that is decency. It's the attitude that has seemed pervasive here in recent weeks that a few seconds of effort (in this case writing a warning) it an outrageous expectation to make life better for someone else.

And some things are very traumatizing to some people. Nothing that should be permitetted on the site would traumatize me particularly, but that does not mean I don't worry about other people who might be traumatized.

Despite protestations pope can get hurt. Psychological trauma is very real. Even if it's inconvenient to others.

Fair enough, but we weren't talking about content warnings, i.e. explicit violence or rape or torture. The OP referenced specifically M/M sexual contact...

 

[old_prof]

Fair enough, but we weren't talking about content warnings, i.e. explicit violence or rape or torture. The OP referenced specifically M/M sexual contact...

I have limited tolerance overall for that kind of homophobia, I'll grant you. Some of the discussion I thought this discussion had wandered into general tags vs warnings on content discussion.

I was also disturbed by the general if they don't know about tags, fuck em" attitude that was expressed by several people here. Mayne I;m just being overly sensitive right now. But I;m a big believer in erring on the side of helping people, not disparaging their concerns.

 

[Ianus4]

As a reader: please, please, use tags!
Every day, 20-30 stories appear in the categories I follow. It's impossible to read through them all, so I simply have to filter them somehow. I was very happy when someone showed me here on the forum how to view tags without scrolling to the end of the stories, and since then, this is the first thing I do when I open a new story. If there are no tags at all, I simply close it. I don't have time for a dark horse. There was a story that was more than twenty pages long without a single tag, and I really don't know what the (otherwise new) author was thinking, why should I spend so much time on their work when I could read half a dozen others in the same time?
Please use as many tags as possible, especially to warn readers about trigger topics. Often, only one or two very general tags are used, which is always suspicious.
Think like a reader. At the end of a tiring, often stressful workday, perhaps tormented by family problems, they open a story in their free half hour. They probably don't want to be unexpectedly drawn into a humiliating, cheating, disrespectful story about a particular gender, sexual orientation, or race. This may be the writer's fetish, but don't impose it on the reader. The reader, on the other hand, would love to read a story where the main characters love and respect each other and the ending is HEA/HFN. I know it's terribly corny, but believe me, there are people who want to feel, even if only for a little while at the end of the day, that the world is basically okay. If your story has this (even if it's a femdom story, for example), don't be ashamed to advertise it with tags too.
For me, for example, it's very important that the plot is basically about the relationship between two people, so please indicate in advance if there is swinging, polyamory, or moresomes, even if you don't think it's central to the story. It matters to some people. Noncon, humiliation, or incest can be just as upsetting to others. Or, for example, not everyone likes to read dark stories in every life situation.
Also, consider using tags that will allow readers to find your story months or years later by searching for tags. Not everyone can keep up with the site, so don't let your story get lost without good tags. For example, will they find the wholesome story of two lesbian farm girls who adopted a black boy with ADHD who later became a veterinarian? You may find your biggest fan yet if they come across your story. Perhaps in a year's time, in the depths of your worst writer's block, you might receive an email from them containing a half-sentence that provides the solution to your unpublished story you abandoned two years ago.
The other thing I respectfully ask is that you put your story in the appropriate category and don't choose based on where there's less chance of bombing. (For example, the racist BNWO/BBC scum have recently flooded Fetish and CD after IR, and I often open these categories only to close them again immediately.) There is a great need to rethink the categories fundamentally. LW is just a textbook example of this, but there are problems with almost every other category. Of course, I don't expect any change in this regard.
I rarely give one star (and even then I feel bad about it and usually correct it upwards afterwards), but unpleasant surprises are still irritating.
Both the appropriate tags and the correct categorization help the reader, and the foreword indicates to me that the author has taken extra care.
It is in the interest of both the author and the reader that the story forms a bridge between them, but to achieve this, the reader must be guided there.

 

[AG31]

I was a reader for over two decades without realizing tags even existed. The site make them so obscure as to be nearly useless.

And why it this such a big issue for the author to provide? Again, why are so many people fixedly determined that spending a few seconds to make others's better is not a problem. Where did basic human decency go here?


Not if they're unaware that tags exist. Why can't people understand not everyone knows what they know?

Basically, I'm resisting the trend toward making people responsible for the effect of their ideas on other people. I've got limits, of course, racism, sexism. But asking professors to be sure they're not triggering any students is absurd, as an example. Let the student investigate before the semester begins.

 

[AG31]

I was a reader for over two decades without realizing tags even existed. The site make them so obscure as to be nearly useless.

But if you experienced distress by reading certain content, you probably would have complained, or investigated for ways to avoid that content. But you probably just stopped reading when you found the content distasteful.

 

[YmaOHyd]

Fair enough, but we weren't talking about content warnings, i.e. explicit violence or rape or torture. The OP referenced specifically M/M sexual contact...

True, but the question was "was a tag sufficient notification." Several people now, myself included, have said that they don't look at tags. Regardless of how you feel about that, I think it's clear that if you have a piece of information about the story you want to make clear up front, putting it in the tags is not sufficient. Whether it should be, what kinds of things should be tagged or require a content warning, and the ethics and norms around that are all different discussions. Tags are not sufficiently to convey important information about your story to readers. They're not displayed to readers pre-click, and once in the story require extra clicks to access.

 

[Britva415]

lots of people are put off by M/M activity even if it is not Gay Male

Like... maybe especially if it's not GM

 

[ElectricBlue]

I was a reader for over two decades without realizing tags even existed. The site make them so obscure as to be nearly useless.

Well fuck, I found them on the first day I was here, because I'm curious, press the buttons to find out what they do. Same with the new format, "Gee, I wonder what that little luggage label does? Oh, it's not a luggage label, it's a tag. Oh, I get it. Clever."

And why it this such a big issue for the author to provide? Again, why are so many people fixedly determined that spending a few seconds to make others's better is not a problem. Where did basic human decency go here?

Because there are only ten tags, and I use them to promote the kinks in a story. Why the fuck authors are expected to mind read all the delicate readers who want squick warnings, I don't know.

It's got nothing to with decency - it's spruiking my kinks in a story. It's your job to worry about yours. As for warnings in the preamble to a story, why would I give the storyline away?

Not if they're unaware that tags exist. Why can't people understand not everyone knows what they know?

Why is someone else's inability to figure out their way around an adult erotica website my problem?

I've said it a number of times, this is an adult website, act like an adult. If you need your mother to hold your hand, maybe you're not quite old enough to be here yet. Which for an old prof, would be ironic.

To suggest we should put squick warnings in a preamble because people don't know about tags is ridiculous, frankly.

 

[AG31]

Like... maybe especially if it's not GM

Precisely.

 

[redgarters]

I expect readers to do their own policing of the content. The writer can't be expected to plaster warnings about everything and anything sexual that might offend the tastes of millions of people that might read the story at some point. The categories and tags are right there, if you read something in my stories that shocked you, and it's well within the category and tags, that's entirely on you.
Of course, this guy wouldn't agree, even though he selected a story to read in LESBIAN SEX tagged LESBIAN, but you can't please everyone I guess...

 

[redgarters]

Oh, and as a bisexual man I'll add that if the reader is so horribly offended or disgusted by same sex activity that they demand a warning, then they are the problem, not the writer.
Not liking having your 'stroke focus' (strocus...?) interrupted by something that maybe turns you off a bit in a 'not my kink' kind of way is quite normal, but being so disgusted that you feel the need to throw a fit in comments and demand a special warning on every story that might have two guys sexually interacting is just assholery in my book.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

I expect readers to do their own policing of the content. The writer can't be expected to plaster warnings about everything and anything sexual that might offend the tastes of millions of people that might read the story at some point. The categories and tags are right there, if you read something in my stories that shocked you, and it's well within the category and tags, that's entirely on you.
Of course, this guy wouldn't agree, even though he selected a story to read in LESBIAN SEX tagged LESBIAN, but you can't please everyone I guess...
View attachment 2593050

I'm just guessing that the story was published in LS...

 

[ElectricBlue]

Oh, and as a bisexual man I'll add that if the reader is so horribly offended or disgusted by same sex activity that they demand a warning, then they are the problem, not the writer.
Not liking having your 'stroke focus' (strocus...?) interrupted by something that maybe turns you off a bit in a 'not my kink' kind of way is quite normal, but being so disgusted that you feel the need to throw a fit in comments and demand a special warning on every story that might have two guys sexually interacting is just assholery in my book.

The angst against man on man action that one sees, and see surprisingly often even here in the AH, has always made me wonder. Some folk really make such a big deal about it, that I tend to think, "D'ost thou protest too much?"

Then I think of the gay male chapters I've got in a couple of long chaptered stories - you know, the ones long enough to see overall trends in the whole thing - where the GM chapter has a higher view count (maybe 10% - 15%) than the chapters either side, and a higher score. I attribute that to the, "Oh no, I'm not gay," crowd, and they're reading it twice to make sure.

In the absence of a Bisexual category (which is the biggest absurdity on this site by a long shot), the notion that even the merest hint of M/M should default the story to the Gay Male category is bollocks. Oooo, bollocks, don't let his touch mine!

I got this comment, which I think is rather sweet:

You captured the essence of the genre so well! I found it a bit much with the male bisexual element though. Not my cup of tea. The rest - well what can I say? This was well written, on point, and certainly captivating. The attention to detail and idiomatic descriptors were so Spillane! Another five stars.

But at least he didn't get the vapours - might have needed two sugars, I don't know.

 

[crookedletter]

strocus

Love it. Seconded. The motion carries.

 

[redgarters]

I'm just guessing that the story was published in LS...

It was, and tagged LESBIAN!

 

[redgarters]

The angst against man on man action that one sees, and see surprisingly often even here in the AH, has always made me wonder. Some folk really make such a big deal about it, that I tend to think, "D'ost thou protest too much?"

Then I think of the gay male chapters I've got in a couple of long chaptered stories - you know, the ones long enough to see overall trends in the whole thing - where the GM chapter has a higher view count (maybe 10% - 15%) than the chapters either side, and a higher score. I attribute that to the, "Oh no, I'm not gay," crowd, and they're reading it twice to make sure.

In the absence of a Bisexual category (which is the biggest absurdity on this site by a long shot), the notion that even the merest hint of M/M should default the story to the Gay Male category is bollocks. Oooo, bollocks, don't let his touch mine!

I got this comment, which I think is rather sweet:

But at least he didn't get the vapours - might have needed two sugars, I don't know.

Absolutely agree. A bisexual category would be nice to have.