It's Your Turn To Ban A Book!

[shereads]

Battleship Potemkin?

(I think I fell asleep... )

All the more reason to see it at a coffee house.

Cantdog and everybody who's awake, I read somewhere that if intelligent life somewhere in space is listening for signs of life elsewhere, the first radio signal they'll receive from earth is a speech by Adolph Hilter that was boosted to be broadcast globally.

Imagine. The first thing we will advertise about ourselves as a civilization is Hitler.

Worst case scenario: the aliens will say, "Finally another species that sees things our way."

 

[cantdog]

Aliens believe Deutschland needs Lebensraum?

 

[BlackShanglan]

Aliens believe Deutschland needs Lebensraum?

No no - it's the queers. They're in it with the aliens. They're building landing strips for gay Martians.

I swear to God.

Shanglan

 

[shereads]

Aliens believe Deutschland needs Lebensraum?

Scary, isn't it?

"These Earth folk are people I'd like to have a beer with. Let's go say hello."

"I'll go. I've been monitoring a more recent signal...'Rush' somebody. He sounds like good people too."

 

[cantdog]

They aren't alone. The whole western world seemed to fall in love with the efficiency and organized power of the Nazi state. We've adopted a good deal from them, and so have a lot of folks. Some of the Latin American and African states are like a bad parody. Everything but the efficiency. No fun to live in, though, any of them.

 

[shereads]

They aren't alone. The whole western world seemed to fall in love with the efficiency and organized power of the Nazi state. We've adopted a good deal from them, and so have a lot of folks. Some of the Latin American and African states are like a bad parody. Everything but the efficiency. No fun to live in, though, any of them.

But when the aliens arrive and find out Hitler was defeated, they're going to be disappointed. All hell will break loose. They'll transplant our heads onto the bodies of chihuahuas, like in "Mars Attacks."

~ ~ ~

"Can't we all just get along?"

~ President Jack Nicholson's moving plea to the alien leader, right before they blast Washington to smithereens.

Go to sleep, Cdog.

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

Scary, isn't it?

"These Earth folk are people I'd like to have a beer with. Let's go say hello."

"I'll go. I've been monitoring a more recent signal...'Rush' somebody. He sounds like good people too."

No, it's scary that those are the aliens we'd be the most likely to meet. A benevolent race would take one look at our history and manner of speak and refrain from giving us anything more dangerous than straw and even then only if it was a small straw.

A malevolent race would say, "easy target and sitting on top a flarp mine of slood. Let's head in, wipe out the hominids, take it and deliver it to Planet Deutschland."

A middle of the road race would just raise an eyebrow and go, "well it's intelligence, but does it sound like a place you'd want to visit scientifically? All right, fine, but away from the major population centers. I don't think I want them to know we exist."

 

[cantdog]

Really gone, this time, I swear. Good night.

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

Hee hee, we've so hijacked this thread.

 

[cantdog]

Fuckin chihuahuas, dude.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Fuckin chihuahuas, dude.

Just don't try to post a story about it.

Shanglan

 

[BooMerengue]

This may have been posted already. I apologize if so. I visit this site frequently, and make sure my grandkids have access to any book listed.

http://onlinebooks.library.upenn.edu/banned-books.html

Luckily my local library feels as I do and they help me find books when I need them.

No books should ever be banned.

 

[Kassiana]

I think the world's fallen in love with Mr. Potter from It's A Wonderful Life, personally. Greed and capitalism yay, the poor can rot in shacks I charge any amount of rent I want them to pay or die on the street.

 

[Boota]

Trace Darwin forward through degeneration hysteria, racial science and eugenics. You'd...

...Pragmatism has quite as much to answer for as religious fervor.

Shanglan

Interesting point, but that seems very indirect as compared to the long history of, "You don't believe in Jesus? Then you have to die."

 

[BlackShanglan]

Interesting point, but that seems very indirect as compared to the long history of, "You don't believe in Jesus? Then you have to die."

Depends on how indirect you consider incineration to be.

Shanglan

 

[shereads]

No, it's scary that those are the aliens we'd be the most likely to meet. A benevolent race would take one look at our history and manner of speak and refrain from giving us anything more dangerous than straw and even then only if it was a small straw.

A malevolent race would say, "easy target and sitting on top a flarp mine of slood. Let's head in, wipe out the hominids, take it and deliver it to Planet Deutschland."

A middle of the road race would just raise an eyebrow and go, "well it's intelligence, but does it sound like a place you'd want to visit scientifically? All right, fine, but away from the major population centers. I don't think I want them to know we exist."

I find two options credible:

They don't think of us at all, until Earth is in the way of a major highway project. Always know where your towel is.

They've already found us, contained us, studied us and are bored with us. Like the ant farm I had when I was eight years old. Once in a while, I'd give it a little shake in the thoughtlessly mean way of bored children, just to watch them scramble to rebuild their tunnels. That would explain recent history. Eventually, shaking the farm won't be entertaining anymore. They might even feel sorry for us. When that happens, they'll take us outside and let us loose in the wild. I'm not sure I want to be around when that happens.

 

[shereads]

Depends on how indirect you consider incineration to be.

Shanglan

I think you're connecting a belief in Darwin's Theory with the Holocaust. Isn't that a bit like blaming Isaac Newton for plane crashes?

 

[cantdog]

Yes, but the perpetrators made the error, not the horse!

Nice horse! Come here, there's a good , uh, boy or whatever. The bad woman will think again, you'll see.

 

[shereads]

Yes, but the perpetrators made the error, not the horse!

Nice horse! Come here, there's a good , uh, boy or whatever. The bad woman will think again, you'll see.

Chemistry is our friend, but we must respect it. Goodnight, Cdog.

 

[shereads]

Stop that right now, Isaac Newton! You'll make cantdog fall down!

 

[cantdog]

The outdated pill was a loner, shereads, and I am without its benefits tonight. I appreciate that I was a mess last evening, but for tonight I must rely on fatigue. I would, however, have had another; you are not misguided! But alas, you can't pop what you don't have.

We had snow and I have been shoveling extensively. The spell of fifty-degree weather has already begun. I wanted the surfaces as clear of snow as I could reasonably get them, so that the thaw could do its work. Consequently, I am stiff of muscle and exhausted. It might not make me sleep, but it is helping. I think.

Leave Sir isaac out of this. I have no quarrel with him.

 

[shereads]

But alas, you can't pop what you don't have.

You, Elvis and Rush have this in common now. God bless you.

 

[cantdog]

Not just us. It's a universal truth, more's the pity. Where's Owsley when you need the boy?

 

[BlackShanglan]

Yes, but the perpetrators made the error, not the horse!

Nice horse! Come here, there's a good , uh, boy or whatever. The bad woman will think again, you'll see.

Perfectly said, Cantdog. I'm yours to ride whenever you need a lift.

*nuzzle*

Shanglan

 

[Wildcard Ky]

I say ban the Similarillion. It's like trying to read a King James version of the Bible.