Late Night with Dr. Chanaud

[TheOlderGuy]

Phil(Tony)

"Doc, I'm purely professional. You know me wel....well, never mind. But I'm there to help them, and sometimes those lines can get blurred, in the emotional world in which we work. It's not often that my clients want their husbands to sit in on their sessions. Hell, some of them don't even want to go home to their husbands, but I can't set up a harem, can I?

"Doc, don't those lines ever get blurred for you? I've heard some stories of some of your cases where you were having a hard time keeping your self-control, and I don't mean I read about it in the magazines."

 

[chanaud]

Tony, you seem to indicate to know me, but I still don't have a clue who you are. Also, I don't know what you heard. I've always been professional and have never lost my self-control.

 

[TheOlderGuy]

Phil(Tony)

"Listen, Doc," I was whispering, thinking perhaps that the listeners weren't going to hear me if I said it softly enough. "We were quite an item a few years ago. It's Phil . . ." as softly as I could, maybe too soft for even her to hear. "I really need your help. I hope your not still sore at me. I'm afraid I might lose my license."

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

My voice shrieked over the airwaves. Phiiiiiil????

"Ssshhhhhhhh...."

"Phil...." my voice turned into a whisper. "Phil, from Betty Fo.."

"Sshhhhhhhh...not over the airwaves."

 

[TheOlderGuy]

Phil (Tony)

"Yeh, Doc, it's me -- Tony. Now you remember? We had some good times, baby. I still can't look at peaches and whipped cream the same way. And those full moons, geeze, I get a hard-on every time I see a full moon." Audible sigh.

"But, Doc, can I see you? I don't think we can really talk about this over the phone, you know with everyone listening."

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

*sigh*

My voice trails off. Oh yess... I remember the good times.

I, also remember how you used me, you SOB!

Yes, I think we should meet.

My show ends in 15 minutes. Why don't you drop by my office.

 

[TheOlderGuy]

Phil (Tony)

"Oh, honey, I'm really sorry about that. She really was . . ., well I was drunk, you know, and she . . ., never mind. But, I've changed. I know guys just use that as a line and all, but I have.
Anyway, I'll see you in fifteen. Thanks, love. You're a peach."

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

15 Minutes Later.

The time is 1 am and I have to say good night. Sweet dreams my dear listeners and I hope to talk to you tomorrow, same time, from 10 pm to 1am, live on 1680 WSRZ.

I looked up to watch the 'On Air' dim. Behind the large glass pane was him....

 

[TheOlderGuy]

Phil

It was only five blocks to her studio. I walked that way often, wondering if we would bump into each other some day, wondering if I would run from her if I saw her, or if she would smack me across my face and turn away. I'd been a jackass years ago, ruining the one good thing going on in my life, and I'd lived with the regret ever since. I was sweating profusely, not from the exercise of the walk, for in truth the chill night air felt great, but no, I was sweating from the anticipation of seeing her again.

Somewhere deep inside I still didn't feel worthy of being in her presence. I was ashamed, even knowing that I had grown up since then, nonetheless I felt ashamed that I had been so thoughtless with her. There it was, lights still glowing in the fifth floor offices. I bounded up the stairs, letting myself in just in time to see her signing off for the night. When she looked up at me through the window of her professional fortress, the fear struck me in my gut full force. I forced a smile, and waved meekly at her.

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

He looked the same! Though how could I forget him. His face constantly haunted my relationships.

I gave him my publicity smile. Broad - definatley, not warm.

I held a finger up to indicate him to wait. Feigning business, I waited until Jackie and the crew said their good nights.

Until then, I rose from my chair and walked to where he was waiting.

"Well...well...well. So, what brings you here, Phil?" I leaned in and turned my cheek for his kiss.

 

[TheOlderGuy]

Phil

After finishing up with the details of closing her show, her staff filed out and she walked over to greet me, her smile tight and polite. Offering her cheek to me, all I could think of was the feel of those lips on mine. Trying to promote the good boy role I had created I kissed the proffered cheek, laying my arm around her shoulder and holding her close for a moment. She smelled grand, never one for strong commercial scents, she smelled like warmed up woman. Love it.

"Marie, thanks so much for seeing me. It's kinda weird, isn't it? It certainly is for me. I was a jerk, and you were a saint." My mind wandered back to those best-of-times-worst-of-times days, and the fights we would have over the silliest of things, and the nights of lust and unchecked passion. "Well, actually you could be a real bitch sometimes, but I really loved you, Marie." She seemed touched by the words. "I still do. But, of course, everything is so different now."

I stood back holding her hands at arms length while I looked her up and down. What a damn fine figure she still cut, dressed to impress even in this visionless medium in which she worked. Her face was flushed, her hands warm, a trickle of sweat still working it's way down her neck. Her breasts, as always, gave me a rush, heaving gently with her breath, the faint outline of her nipples giving me a rise. I leaned back in, inhaling deeply of her aroma, licking the drops of sweat from her neck.

"Sorry. I couldn't help myself."

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Marie Chanaud

Marie.

I closed my eyes to drink in the sound of my name being spoken through his lips. I haven't been called that in a long time. Only he knew my past and all of my deep dark secrets.

Marie.

He said it again. My head started swooning, leaving me breathless and sweating profusely.

Damn! He's always had that effect on me.

He leaned in and inhaled deeply, his lips tickled my neck, sending shivers down my body. His tongue followed his lips. I couldn't prevent the moan from escaping my lips.

My tongue swept across my dehydrated lips before I released a breathless, "Phil....dammit you!"

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

Tom drove down the road clutching the steering wheel in frustration. Long distance romances were hard enough, and his had just crumbled before him. Not only was he powerless to reach Julie on the phone, he was 2,000 miles away. They were through.

He wasn't angry, just terribly alone. He needed to talk, he needed a woman. He flipped through the AM channels, looking for some talk show to ease his mind.

This is Dr. Chanaud coming to you live on 1680 WSRZ. Our phone lines are open, so call now at 867-5309 and you will be on the air.

Dr. Chanaud? Tom thought she was off the air! Man she had that low raspy voice that had driven Tom absolutely crazy when he had heard her show before. He remembered looking her photo up on the net. She was one hot dish. On that red leather couch. Mmm.

Well, why the hell not? He quickly dialed the number and reached a woman named Jackie. He told her of his problem. She put him on hold.

Tom drummed his fingers on the dashboard, finally pulling over on the side of the road to stay in a strong cell zone. He almost paniced and hung up. But this was fate. He found her show for a reason, and Tom was determined to see it through.

OMG, he was the next caller! Jackie said that the next voice he would hear would be the famous Dr. Chanaud herself...

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

After another disastrous affair with my ex boyfriend, Dr. Phil, I promised myself to never fall for another man again. I knew I shouldn’t have given him a second opportunity but he actually had me convinced he had changed. He told me I was the only one he needed. I was until he met that blonde…

Relationships were out. Never again will I ever commit again. I’m going back to my old motto which every man has used at one time or another, “Fuck and leave em’” Beside, I don’t need a full time man in my life right now. I still have my looks and my career is on the rise. And I made sure it’s going to continue rising when I made sure an interview with a noted journalist named Mya was the most memorable she ever had. She walked away smiling with satisfaction and promised nothing but glowing reports.

“Dr. Chanaud?” My faithful assistant’s voice woke me from my revelry.

“Yes, Jackie.”

“You have sixty seconds..”

”Thank you Jackie.”

I took a sip of my iced Evian and fidgeted until I was comfortable in my black leather chair.

The "ON AIR" flashed promptly at 11:00. A man's voice announced my show. "Dr. Chanaud, the goddess of love. Live on 1680 WSRZ".

Jackie gave me the thumbs up. Clearing my throat, I started.

"Good evening, my name is Dr. Chanaud. If you feel the need, call me. I am yours for the next two hours. ‘

Jackie’s voice echoed through the airwaves,

"Dr. Chanaud, your first caller is.............."

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

Tom felt that sales guy lever in him click to ON. His voice was smooth and unforced, he just let his training take over.

Tom, Tom Eagleton. Good evening Dr. Chanaud. It has been a pleasure to listen to you, not only for the great advise you give to your guests, but the sense of humor. You make me laugh almost every show.

Tom smiled and laughed a little along with the good Doctor, then kept right on speaking -

"Jackie admonished me to get straight to the point so, here it is. I've just ended a long distance, but torrid relationship with a woman who I spent almost every waking hour thinking of or talking to. Now three years later, its over and I find that all my former friends have slipped away due to my neglect. I'm lonely and determined to live life to the fullest and my question to you is this - "

With a deep breath Tom asked his question -

"I want to meet a woman who is smart, creative, outgoing and not at all afraid to express herself. Do women like that still exist out there for me, and if so how or where can I meet one? You being the queen of love, no wait, goddess of love, seemed to be the perfect person to call...."

Tom smiled after he was done speaking. This was fun. He hadn't mentioned that it would also be great if the woman was a wanton sexual lioness with large nipples that hardened at his slightest provocation. That criteria was better left unsaid. For now ...

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

First of all, Tom. I have to compliment you on your phone voice. It’s obvious from your self-confidence that you are an expert in public speaking. Second, I think it’s wonderful that you are looking for an intellectual woman without requiring a certain physical attribute. Men like you are very rare. The type of women you described exists. All you have to do is look around; they are all over the place.

(voice drops a notch to a low sultry voice)

In fact, you are talking to one right now.

(chuckle)

Anyway, all you have to do is get past this love affair that seems to be haunting you. Because if you don’t, it won’t be fair to whomever you meet. I can hear from your voice that you haven’t stopped thinking about her. Am I correct in assuming that, Tom?

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

Tom laughed, the good Doctor certainly had a great radio voice! Low and erotic it reminded him of Kim Carnes without the country twang. He spoke -

Perhaps, dear Doctor I have found the one that I am looking for already! What are ~you~ doing later on?

Tom grinned hoping his smile would transmit through the radio.

Actually Doctor, let me directly answer your question. I have stopped thinking about her. Hence the hole in my life. My voice probably only reflects the regret of time wasted. I'm ready to move on, but then I came to the startling revelation that I really don't know how. I've been out-of-circulation you might say!

So Doctor, what's the first move? "

Tom's mind raced, he was only an hour from her studio. He could easily be there when she finshed her show yet tonight. Without thinking he wheeled his black STS around and sped towards downtown. He could ask for her forgiveness later if she was extremely put off by his showing up. In his experience that was far easier than asking for her permission in advance ...

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

A slow chuckle echoed through the airwaves when Tom asked what I was doing later on.

(in a teasing voice)
Why, Tom! I do believe you were asking me out. Mmmm…Too bad you’re not nearby since I don’t have any plans later. That reminds me, Jackie what are you doing later?

Jackie:
Ooohhh..my mother is in town, Dr. Chanaud.

(sigh)

Maybe, next time. Give your mother a kiss from me, dear.

Jackie:
She’s listening to you right now.

(deep throated chuckle, followed by a kiss)
Hello, to my favorite woman, Jackie’s mum!

Tom:
Hello Jackie’s Mom!

That’s sweet of you, Tom. I’m glad you called me. I’ve revived many sex lives for men who have been out of circulation for sometime. My answer to how to make the first move is….If you see someone who you are interested in, why don’t you just walk up to her and talk to her. Show her you are interested in her and try to establish some form of connection with her. But don’t make it too obvious. Don’t forget women like the chase; and they usually are quick to be turned off if you are too obvious. Are you interested in someone right now, Tom?

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

This was perfect! Dr. Chanaud was openly flirting with him, and had just given him the unknowing go ahead to "just walk up to her and talk to her". He would use those very words to his advantage soon. Tom laughed. Surprise! Time to have a little fun with the vivacious Dr. Chanaud! Tom spoke -

Why Doctor! Be careful what you wish for, it just may just cum true! Yes as a matter of fact there is a woman who I have my sights set on. She doesn't know it yet though.

Your words are well taken Dr., I must not be too quick or too pushy. No Jimmy Buffett "Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw type of lines that's for sure.

I'm looking to play the sheepish "Here I am and I'm attracted to you card." Do you think I should act like that or be bolder?

Something like "Hello, destiny calling. We were meant to meet tonight, and the rest is up to us. You tell me how this ends."

Either one is really me, depending on my mood. So I'd be honest either way. Let me ask the question another way, which approach would get your attention personally Doctor?

The big Northstar engine in that STS hurtled his Cadillac onto the on ramp of the Dan Ryan expressway. In no time he could see the Sears Tower in the distance. Dr. Chanaud herself just ahead ...

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

All of a sudden his voice sounded clearer. It was almost as if he was next door. Shrugging it off as Tom being in a great cell zone, I continued on with a broad smile. This man was bold and direct and I love the way his mind can adjust to any scenario. My type of man…

Weeelll..Tom..it would depend on my mood. If you were to approach me right now, I would say, I prefer my favorite Jimmy Buffett song, Let’s get drunk and screw. In fact, that song has become my motto.

Tell me, Tom…..What would you do if a woman comes right out and suggests it to you? Would you be turned off by her boldness?

(short pause, voice dropped an octave)

Or would you be willing to take on the challenge?

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

OMG! Had she just challenged him? The lovely Doctor Chanaud had just unknowingly pushed his hottest button. Tom grinned inwardly, praying that she would prove to be a worthy opponent. Good competition is just so hard to find these days.

A Robert Palmer song flipped into his mind, especially this one particular verse -

A pretty face don't make no pretty heart
I learned that buddy from the start
You think I'm cute, a little bit shy
Mama, I ain't that kind of guy

Doctor Doctor, gimme the news I got a
Bad case of lovin' you
No pill's gonna kill my ill I got a
Bad case of lovin' you

Shyness did not describe Tom at all. He answered slowly and forcefully -

Ahh Doctor, I always answer the challenge. It's in my blood. This dog's bark is just like his bite. Big. In fact if you need a single verb to describe me, you can do far worse that that one. Let's just say I never disappoint.

The short answer to your question is that I'd take her up on an offer like that faster than a Kerry Woods fastball. Boldness becomes you.

So tell me two things Doctor. Do you have a first name and how long does the show last tonight?

Tom grinned again. This time it was an evil grin. Downtown swam into view ...

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

I couldn’t silence the low moan from passing my red full lips at his emphasis on the word “BIG”. My body relaxed deeper into my oversized black leather chair while my eyes glazed with lust at the large microphone before me.

Well, Tom. I answer to anything but by my first name. And if you were really a fan of mine, you will know my show ends at 1 am every night.

(chuckle)

So, Tom, forget about me. Why don’t you tell me and the many women out there listening to your sultry voice, what makes your bark so ‘BIG’? And once you bite, do you have the stamina to satisfy your victim?

The sound of his voice and the phallic sized instrument made me lick my lips in anticipation for his answer. Callers like his were rare and I was in no hurry to let him go…

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

Tom heard the moan, and that caused him to squirm in his seat. He reached down inside his long briefs and adjusted himself so that he was not quite so cramped. His cock was throbbing at the lewd dulcet tones of Dr. Chanaud. He hung on each and every word.

Well Dr., in my case BIG is more than a relative term. I have had that adjective applied to me, er my bite that is by every woman I have ever met. If I do say so myself, I am larger than life. And you can take that comment any way you wish ....

Once bitten my ~victims~ writhe and moan for hours. The effects of my bites are long lasting, tending to drain these women of all their energy. After a sustained close encounter with my mouth most women are exhausted and sleep soundly when we finally quit.

In fact I was thinking about putting a warning label on my chin, saying "Do not Use when Drowsy". So tell me Doctor, did you get a solid sleep last night? I certainly hope so....

 

[chanaud]

Dr. Chanaud

I will take your ‘larger than life’ comment exactly how you implied it, Tom. But, I like many women have been told that many times in the past and have been deeply disappointed. For some reason though…

(short pause for my tongue to moisturize my dehydrated lips)

I believe you. There’s something in your voice. I can’t place my finger on it. Though I want to

(snicker)

In fact, I wouldn’t just use my finger, if you know what I mean.

God, I love this kind of bantering!

But Tom, you boast that you tire most women. Which I’m sure you do. But, I’m not like most women. I’ve had the best and I have yet found anyone to completely satisfy my dark desires. Tell me Tom…I’m wondering….


Jackie:
Pardon me, Dr. Chanaud. I hate to interrupt this incredible conversation but we must allow your sponsors some air time.

Tom, don’t go, I still desire you ermm..desire to talk with you. I shall be back in 2 minutes. Now on to our sponsor…

 

[darrenfate]

Thomas Eagleton

Tom grinned, and reached for his Palm Pilot. Time for a little research. He hopped on the net and checked out the latest Nielson radio ratings for the Chicago market. Dr. Chanaud's show was up big. The overnights were huge. Seems that her public missed her when she was briefly off the air. With numbers like these Tom mused, she is on the air to stay. Even the venerable WGN, AM 720 lost it's late night time slot to the good Doctor!

"Dr. Chanaud, the goddess of love. Live on 1680 WSRZ". We are talking with Tom, now where were we Tom?

Tom spoke as they came back on air.

You were just about to ask me a question. But before you do that, congratulations on the terrific Nielson ratings. Number one in your time slot. The fact that every red blooded man and woman within the sound of your sexy voice is drawn to your sheer magnetism is now proven in the numbers.

Speaking of a powerful attraction Doctor do you believe in fate? I do not think it an "accidental" occurance that we are talking tonight. I've always had this question for you whenever I hear your show. What exactly are you wearing right now? I am having some powerful visual images about you, all of them in compromising positions ...