Make me dirty

[steve44uk]

muesli

They were poor, but they had each other. In the first torrid bloom of their romance, they paid little heed to anything but themselves. They once spent four days living on nothing but muesli mixed with water - they couldn't afford milk - wolfing it down between hours-long bouts of sex that alternated between the languid and the frantically energetic.

They were poor. But happy.

melancholy

 

[NaokoSmith]

melancholy

He was stricken in his state of melancholy, that frozen condition which Freud regards as the dangerous nostalgic refusal to mourn, to let something go so that it can paradoxially become part of you and allow you to build, to move on.

She saved him through gardening. At first he sulked in a deckchair on the patio, re-reading Proust and consuming madeleines dipped in tea. After she had planted the fifth daffodil bulb upside down, he shouted: "Not like that!" and came over to plunge the trowel into the moist dark fertile earth, clearing a hole in which he gently placed the daffodil bulb with its tender tip pointing towards the sunshine. Their fingers briefly entangled as she helped put the soil back over the bulb and he smiled.

Bubbles

 

[steve44uk]

bubbles

"How many times do I have to tell you, don't call me that..." His irritable words trailed off as she expertly pulled his foreskin back, exposing the fat, shiny plum of his cockhead. She pursed her lips, sliding them languidly over his glans and sucking gently.

Releasing him with a soft pop, she grinned up at him. "Whatever you say... Bubbles..."

His retort died in his throat as she returned to her work, her eyes dancing with amusement.

recidivism

 

[NaokoSmith]

Recidivism

He attempted to push her head back by squashing her nose but the wanton woman had no intention of reforming from her recidivism. "Dearest Bubbles," she murmured, the pout of her mouth as she formed the word buzzing on his cock. She blew one around his tender crown before returning to a less reprehensible repetitive behavour.

Nautilus

 

[Handley_Page]

Recidivism

He attempted to push her head back by squashing her nose but the wanton woman had no intention of reforming from her recidivism. "Dearest Bubbles," she murmured, the pout of her mouth as she formed the word buzzing on his cock. She blew one around his tender crown before returning to a less reprehensible repetitive behavour.

Nautilus

He looked at the shell. Sliced in two along the axis, it revealed a myriad collection of cells; and perfectly logarithmic. He reflected that Nature is indeed beautiful.

Carp

 

[NaokoSmith]

He looked at the shell. Sliced in two along the axis, it revealed a myriad collection of cells; and perfectly logarithmic. He reflected that Nature is indeed beautiful.

Carp

They were shimmering up and down the narrow channel of water, blue-grey and golden scales glinting on bodies as thick and muscular as a navvies' arms. Swimming as smooth as silk, they wreathed in and out about each others' bodies, the Japanese Koi carp.

Mellifluous

 

[steve44uk]

mellifluous

Although her name was Agnes, he called her Mel. It was their own private joke. Their friends couldn't understand why, nor why she wasn't irritated by it.

Finally, after incessant questioning from her best friend, she relented. "Well, if you must know," she confided, blushing prettily, "it's short for mellifluous. He says it's because, when he goes down on me, my juices flow like honey..."

doppelgänger

 

[Tio_Narratore]

doppelgänger

He had been such a gentleman at the tea dance that he hardly recognized him at the tavern. Then, when he escorted her home, he barged right in and had his way with her. It wasn't until she spoke to him the next day that she realized it wasn't him; it was his doppelgänger banged her.

pandect

 

[steve44uk]

pandect

It had taken him decades of painstaking, although not entirely unpalatable research. From his earliest naive teenage fumblings, through the enthusiastic explorations of his own (and others') natural sexual appetites, to the farthest frontiers of jaded excess, every act of titillation, every form of congress, natural and un-, was explored, documented and eventually incorporated into his magnum opus.

So when he proudly presented his pandect to his current paramour (and long-suffering research assistant), he was crushed when she turned to the index, cocked an eyebrow and said, "There's no entry for 'missionary,' darling..."

Bowie

 

[NaokoSmith]

Bowie

Safira loved camping and outdoor activities and was delighted when Jerome appeared to share this enthusiasm. They complemented each other so well: she could put up the tent, set and light campfires, cook to perfection over an open flame and he could tie knots.

She was never quite sure how she came to be inveigled into being tied to the oak tree not far from their chosen campsite. She experienced a curious feeling of molten submission as she fluttered her eyelashes up at him; she hoped he could see this subtle signal from where he was hidden from view in the branches above.

This feeling mutated rapidly on the appearance of a brown bear on the scene and then again, when Jerome leapt out of the tree with a terrific roar, waving a large Bowie knife menacingly about.

The subsequent passionate bit of rough love was worth it all! Even if she did have to promise Jerome the jar of honey which she had brought as part of their supplies.

Sesquipedalian.

(Luckily I remembered in time that if she had got the bear hug, it would have been bestiality and edited Jerome back in )

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Sesquipedalian.

He stood out in the pub, a real bruin of a man, large and hairy, and the bulge in his jeans stood out even further. Her curiosity as piqued as was her libido, she suggested a quick bite out back. She knelt before him and undid his pants.

"Oh my god!" she exclaimed as she pulled down his drawers and freed his beast, "I've heard of sesquipedalian words, but this..." And she promptly bit into her more-than-a-foot-long weiner.

Buckyballs

 

[steve44uk]

buckyballs

As Sharon Carter trailed the flat of her tongue down James's turgid shaft, he groaned involuntarily. One one level, he felt bad, screwing around with his best friend Steve's main squeeze, but one flash of that firm, seamed-stockinged thigh as she straddled him to plant a hungry kiss on his lips, and all conscious thought of their betrayal scattered like a flock of startled birds.

Now, as her tongue laved his heavy scrotum, and she sucked one of his testicles into her hot, wet mouth and pulled gently, his cock wept clear tears of frustration.

"Jesus, Sharon, where did you learn to do that...?" he mumbled, his voice thick with desire.

She let him pop gently from her mouth to smile wickedly up at him before replying in a tone that made the skin of his sac tighten with arousal. "Didn't Steve tell you, Bucky, balls are my favourite...?"

Foreshortening

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Foreshortening

"Foreshortening?," the biology major responded to her art teacher's question in her elective class, "Isn't that when a penis doesn't seem as long because the prepuce is covering the glans?"

presbytery

 

[NekoParks]

.......

 

[Saxon_Hart]

presbytery

As the lissome blond rubbed her lover’s glistening cock against her luscious pink lips, she likened it to one of those soaring Presbytery spires that graced their town’s cathedral.

porcupine

porcupine

Sally was reminded of a porcupine when she spied the novelty french tickler adorning Tom's rock hard cock.


depiction

 

[steve44uk]

depiction

Despite his best efforts, his attempts at putting down their sexual acts on paper always ended badly. He so wanted to be an erotica writer, and he had a way with words generally. It was just the... vocabulary...

He was an articulate man, but his repressed upbringing meant that he had no means of telling what language was appropriate for a particular context. To put it bluntly, he struggled to differentiate his quim from his cunt, his cock from his willy and his tits from his dirtypillows.

This rendered his attempts at depiction of the sex act less than satisfactory.

Jenga

 

[danger2no]

depiction

Despite his best efforts, his attempts at putting down their sexual acts on paper always ended badly. He so wanted to be an erotica writer, and he had a way with words generally. It was just the... vocabulary...

He was an articulate man, but his repressed upbringing meant that he had no means of telling what language was appropriate for a particular context. To put it bluntly, he struggled to differentiate his quim from his cunt, his cock from his willy and his tits from his dirtypillows.

This rendered his attempts at depiction of the sex act less than satisfactory.

Jenga

Breaking story: two frat guys injured in naked Jenga pile up. Film at 11.

blister

 

[satisfy]

Breaking story: two frat guys injured in naked Jenga pile up. Film at 11.

blister

As she reached the very edge of her climax, she felt a pressure. Then with a grandiose relief she felt her go over the edge, like a blister popped and slowly oozed pure pleasure throughout her whole body.

Earworm

 

[Saxon_Hart]

As she reached the very edge of her climax, she felt a pressure. Then with a grandiose relief she felt her go over the edge, like a blister popped and slowly oozed pure pleasure throughout her whole body.

Earworm

earworm


Jerry was incensed. How dare Theresa say his magnificent cock was small? He had been slapping her face playfully with his cock. He told her that her ear was one hole he hadn't had yet. She giggled and told him that it would be like the time she had an earworm as a child.


chihuahua

 

[steve44uk]

chihuahua

Tarquin's penis reminded Philomena of a chihuahua, which is to say that it was small, wrinkled, highly-strung and looked down on by many.

But she thought it was cute, and often wished she could carry it round in her handbag...

discourteous

 

[Saxon_Hart]

chihuahua

Tarquin's penis reminded Philomena of a chihuahua, which is to say that it was small, wrinkled, highly-strung and looked down on by many.

But she thought it was cute, and often wished she could carry it round in her handbag...

discourteous

discourteous

Jenny told everyone who would listen, what a jerk Dave had been after their date.
Not only did he shoot his load inside her after she told him to pull out, but then he wiped his dick off on her curtains. "David sounds quite discourteous," was her grand mother's response.


shingles

 

[NekoParks]

......

 

[Tio_Narratore]

fractal

If it hadn't been for the peyote, Mandelbrot would never have ascertained the fractal nature of sex. But there it was, the same no matter what scale he sensed it at; at the body, at the organ, at the cell, it was all fireworks and rockets and trains in tunnels...

recumbent

 

[Saxon_Hart]

fractal

If it hadn't been for the peyote, Mandelbrot would never have ascertained the fractal nature of sex. But there it was, the same no matter what scale he sensed it at; at the body, at the organ, at the cell, it was all fireworks and rockets and trains in tunnels...

recumbent

recumbent

Edgar's recumbent cock angered Martha to the point that she smashed Edgar's testicles with a cast iron skillet.


Jagermeister

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Jagermeister

His mastery from years of experience in the hunt paid off handsomely as he tracked his elusive prey to the watering hole. In the end, it only took one Black and Blue Buck cocktail for the Jagermeister to bag that 42 DD doe.

rondelet