Make your reader climax in 200 words or less

This Totally Wonderful Love Shack

While I was packing some of our stuff for the move to Los Angeles, I looked at my watch and said, "Diane, are you done packing yet? The moving company will be here with the truck in a few minutes!"

But when I got no answer from Diane, I decided to go upstairs and see what was taking her so long.

And as soon as I walked into the bedroom and saw her standing in front of a mirror with only a pair of shoes and a pair of glasses on, I cleared my throat and asked, "Are you feeling okay, Diane?"

That was when she turned around and smiled before she kneeled down, unzipped my pants and sucked my dick.

Of course, that made me get naked and plop the both of us on the bed just im time for me to suck her pussy.

Then, after I gave her a hard fucking in the ass, we stopped to catch our breath before we came to realize that maybe it was not a good idea for us to move to Los Angeles just yet.

Besides, why do we want to move ourselves out of this totally wonderful love shack?
 
Oh The Fire

The pot that I had smoked for my excruciating migraines had done the trick. I hadn't wanted to try it, but my friend Deb talked me into it when I couldn't take the pain anymore. As my husband snored in the next room, we sat in the living room munching on chocolates and drinking wine. I felt a warmth building between my legs that I couldn't control. I felt my nipples harden. Suddenly this woman who had been my best friend for twenty years became flirtatious and sexy as hell. I had always found her attractive and fantasized about being with a woman, but I never had the courage to act on it, until now.

Inhibitions lowered by the weed, I went over to sit by her on the sofa and commented about how horny I suddenly was. Without skipping a beat, she said, "Let's do something about it." Before I knew it we were in on the floor in front of the fire and she told me to let her take me to heaven. She kissed every inch of my body slowly and tied my hands above my head with my pj bottoms. Her tongue finally reached my clitoris and just when I thought I would die from pleasure overload, she pulled a pink vibrator from her bag and sent me into thrashes of ecstasy. I could no longer contain my excitement and cried out, "Fuck, Yes!!!" It was then that I saw over her shoulders that my husband was watching with a grin on his face, but I didn't stop her. I just closed my eyes and surrendered allowed myself to feel every phenomenal moment of the almost unbearable spasms that took over my body.
 
A Unique Job Offer

It was at the West Side Market that Jennifer spotted Betty buying some tomatos and invited her over to her place for a unique job offer.

When they got to the apartment, Betty had smelled something in the air that was forcing the blond to take her clothes off and slip her hand into her yellow thong panties before she saw the brunette standing in front of her with only pink panties on.

After they sat on a chair and slipped their panties off, both Betty and Jennifer got started with fingering each other's wet pussies while Jennifer was sucking on Betty's huge tits.

That was before Jennifer made Betty get off the chair, turn around and bend over in order to shove one end of a double dildo into her snatch and the other end into the blonde's asshole and dig her fingernails into Betty's massive jugs until she was finally able to scream her lungs out.

After they laid down on the floor, a smiling Jennifer said, "Congratulations. You got the job. We are going to have such wonderful fun together.", before she gave Betty a small kiss on the cheek and fell asleep and Betty started crying.
 
Don't know if it works for anybody else, but I get off on build-up. This is a bit from a Hades & Persephone redux I'm working on right now, which will be my first submission to the site:
______

Hades brought his mouth against hers and it was not cold, as she'd expected from the Lord of the Dead. It was fire. He spoke the words against her lips that would undo her, "Will you obey?"

Without waiting for her to respond he seized her in a kiss. Liquid heat coursed through her flesh, lighting her every nerve aflame. He slid his tongue along the bottom of her upper lip and without thought, she opened to him. He growled at this and pressed his advantage, exploring, savoring. She tasted him now, his mouth warm and faintly metallic.

...a darker, more wicked partner...

The thought she'd dismissed at Nysa came bubbling up to confront her. She made a small noise of recognition in her throat and, pressed close, she felt Hades' body respond. He sealed off the kiss with a nip of his teeth to her lower lip and pulled back to look at her, taking in the flush of her cheeks. His eyes bored into her core and he demanded again, "Will you obey?"

No no no no no NO NO! You can't!

"Yes," she breathed, turning the key in a fateful lock, "I will."
______

196 words
 
Don't know if it works for anybody else, but I get off on build-up. This is a bit from a Hades & Persephone redux I'm working on right now, which will be my first submission to the site:
______

Hades brought his mouth against hers and it was not cold, as she'd expected from the Lord of the Dead. It was fire. He spoke the words against her lips that would undo her, "Will you obey?"

Without waiting for her to respond he seized her in a kiss. Liquid heat coursed through her flesh, lighting her every nerve aflame. He slid his tongue along the bottom of her upper lip and without thought, she opened to him. He growled at this and pressed his advantage, exploring, savoring. She tasted him now, his mouth warm and faintly metallic.

...a darker, more wicked partner...

The thought she'd dismissed at Nysa came bubbling up to confront her. She made a small noise of recognition in her throat and, pressed close, she felt Hades' body respond. He sealed off the kiss with a nip of his teeth to her lower lip and pulled back to look at her, taking in the flush of her cheeks. His eyes bored into her core and he demanded again, "Will you obey?"

No no no no no NO NO! You can't!

"Yes," she breathed, turning the key in a fateful lock, "I will."
______

196 words

Well that's a wonderful improvement on some more recent submissions here.
And yes, the buildup is just as exciting.
 
This really happened a few weeks ago.
I had been considering if it might be the basis for a longer piece based on the incident, but then decided, as it is only a moment in time, begun and ended in minutes, to extend it would be to overdo what is, in effect, a simple story.



You know that when you stood before me on the bus, holding on to the pole, I was fantasising that the pole I really wanted your hand to be round, was mine.
I knew you knew that I had noticed you and I was getting harder with every pulse of my cock, as I was idly running my eyes up and down your body, wondering what you might look like naked.

You were only a few feet away and I was longing to slide my hand up your inside thigh and draw circles with my fingers on your soft skin. I would hope you would move closer, knowing that you love the excitement of being teased on public transport, so I could slip my fingers beneath your panties and ease my long middle finger into the growing sticky dampness of your cunt.

So, you were probably so fucking lucky you moved away, down towards the back of the bus, where I was safely out of your reach.

167 words, not counting my preamble.
 
Lucia bent to lick my nipples. I twitched. She grinned. I grinned back and kissed small circles around her dark wide aueroles, my lips' edges dry-rubbing her thick buds. No tongue, sucking, pressure -- only teasing.

Then: BITE! Lucia jumped. I grinned, bit again, started slow deep sucking, tweaking the other, fingering her vulva.

"Oh baby, that's so good, oh yeah, right like that..."

We rolled together, me sucking, tweaking, fingering, Lucia still moaning, shivering. I pressed her pubes. She writhed. I pressed harder, further. Fingers visited her vagina.

My second finger did the trick. Lucia thrashed, flailing arms and legs, crying when I thumbed her clit. My tongue replaced my thumb; I reached for her right breast.

Lucia never quieted. I sucked hard, bit her clit. She screamed hoarsely, flowed, convulsed, passed out.

Lucia opened her eyes, grabbed my hair, pulled me to her spread thighs, muttering incoherently. I took this as an invitation.

I mounted her. Our eyes locked; I slid deep into her treasure.

"Oh shit," we murmured in unison.

We fucked hard, good, thoroughly. No slow romanticism, no tender mercies, just continuous hard pounding, pistoning, until my balls boiled and her vagina drained me. Cowabunga!

-- 199 words --
 
What I Did With The Bride

It was while I was watching some Indians baseball with some friends at the bar when I heard the ladies at the bachelorette party in the next room laughing and screaming their heads off before the maid of honor helped a totally drunk to the elevator but not before she gave me a wink and a card key.

A minute later, I excused myself from my buddies and took the next available elevator up to the floor where the bridal suite was on.

And when I got there, I found a note on the door that said, "Come inside and get naked. She's waiting for you."

Then, after I used the card key and done what the note said, I found the bride laying naked on the bed with her legs open which made me get into bed with that babe and start sucking her tits and fuck her pussy before I let the cum explode out of me and fell right to sleep.

And when I woke up the next day, I found a huge wad of cash on a table with another note saying, "Thanks for doing such a good job. Sally's right about you being the best."
 
Fury

I am certain you would have exhausted yourself upon me eventually, as a storm upon the earth. Your wind would slow, lightning would cease, waves of energy would ease, pounding waves upon my shores would slow to rhythmic caresses and I would be bathed in a forceful dowpour. As the downpour's rivelets flow along my crevices, shaping my terrain to a custom profile, you will be gathering strength again to assail yourself upon my hills and dales, creating puddles, rivers and lakes. Bringing the earth below you to life. And so we shall continue this duet...until we cease to exist.
 
She felt his tongue, daringly insistent and teasing, tantalising the swelling bud of her clitoris, coaxing it out of its hood, making her squirm, curling her toes, rolling her hips, arching her back, pulling gently on his earlobes, spurring him on to attempt other delightful touches.

She loved it especially when he lingered, lightly flicking, fluttering, then swirling, round and round, then surprising her cunt completely by a sudden stab, plunging deep inside the folds, then brushing each labial lip in turn, the blade of his tongue, slicing, sliding, slipping in and out; she was like a river in flood now!

He looked up at her, watching the intensity of her face, contorted with pleasure, taking comfort in knowing she obviously was enjoying every moment, every movement of his mouth on her.

Now, he moved, taking his arms from round her thighs, removing his fingers that had been employed keeping the petals of her pussy splayed, and quickly rose to let her feel the hard, pliant flesh of his rampant cock, again taking her by surprise (she gasped), found and entered her, strong and deep, pushing all the way in and up to the hilt, inside her. She moaned, then squealed in delight as her hips responded and bucked and fucked in time with his pumping thrusts.

(about 200 wds)
 
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I'm hoping this thread attracts a few more writers. It's a challenge writing in 200 words or less. But I love a challenge. Hope it's good for you.

The three of us are right up the back of the empty bus. I suggest we make a video of a public erotic adventure, explaining: “I want Jane bending over you, Carl, grab and knead her arse cheeks, I want you to be pulling them apart so I can video the wet patch that’s growing in her tight shorts. I’ll get her cunt through her shorts, because they are so tight, her lips are clearly visible. Of course I’m not going to stop you sliding your fingers along her wet crack. What do you think, Jane? Does that sound hot? You could rub Carl’s cock through his jeans while he dry finger-fucks you, or a quick lap dance on his bulging prick. The bus driver isn’t caring. And if he did, Hell, he might even stop the bus so he can come up and watch the action!”
And if you are a woman reading this, know that I am stroking my cock, knowing your cunt is so fucking wet right now. Tell me it isn’t, but I know it is. And you want to come, don’t you? Well don’t let me stop you. Come for me and my words here.

200 wds
 
I am certain you would have exhausted yourself upon me eventually, as a storm upon the earth. Your wind would slow, lightning would cease, waves of energy would ease, pounding waves upon my shores would slow to rhythmic caresses and I would be bathed in a forceful dowpour. As the downpour's rivelets flow along my crevices, shaping my terrain to a custom profile, you will be gathering strength again to assail yourself upon my hills and dales, creating puddles, rivers and lakes. Bringing the earth below you to life. And so we shall continue this duet...until we cease to exist.

You should format this into a poem. VERY good stuff!
 
Don't know if it works for anybody else, but I get off on build-up. This is a bit from a Hades & Persephone redux I'm working on right now, which will be my first submission to the site:
______

Hades brought his mouth against hers and it was not cold, as she'd expected from the Lord of the Dead. It was fire. He spoke the words against her lips that would undo her, "Will you obey?"

Without waiting for her to respond he seized her in a kiss. Liquid heat coursed through her flesh, lighting her every nerve aflame. He slid his tongue along the bottom of her upper lip and without thought, she opened to him. He growled at this and pressed his advantage, exploring, savoring. She tasted him now, his mouth warm and faintly metallic.

...a darker, more wicked partner...

The thought she'd dismissed at Nysa came bubbling up to confront her. She made a small noise of recognition in her throat and, pressed close, she felt Hades' body respond. He sealed off the kiss with a nip of his teeth to her lower lip and pulled back to look at her, taking in the flush of her cheeks. His eyes bored into her core and he demanded again, "Will you obey?"

No no no no no NO NO! You can't!

"Yes," she breathed, turning the key in a fateful lock, "I will."
______

196 words

Based on this I'll gladly read when you post.
 
The pot that I had smoked for my excruciating migraines had done the trick. I hadn't wanted to try it, but my friend Deb talked me into it when I couldn't take the pain anymore. As my husband snored in the next room, we sat in the living room munching on chocolates and drinking wine. I felt a warmth building between my legs that I couldn't control. I felt my nipples harden. Suddenly this woman who had been my best friend for twenty years became flirtatious and sexy as hell. I had always found her attractive and fantasized about being with a woman, but I never had the courage to act on it, until now.

Inhibitions lowered by the weed, I went over to sit by her on the sofa and commented about how horny I suddenly was. Without skipping a beat, she said, "Let's do something about it." Before I knew it we were in on the floor in front of the fire and she told me to let her take me to heaven. She kissed every inch of my body slowly and tied my hands above my head with my pj bottoms. Her tongue finally reached my clitoris and just when I thought I would die from pleasure overload, she pulled a pink vibrator from her bag and sent me into thrashes of ecstasy. I could no longer contain my excitement and cried out, "Fuck, Yes!!!" It was then that I saw over her shoulders that my husband was watching with a grin on his face, but I didn't stop her. I just closed my eyes and surrendered allowed myself to feel every phenomenal moment of the almost unbearable spasms that took over my body.

Good one!
 
I am so close I ache with the need for release. Yet, I burn with the desire to bring you first. And I feel your straining to make sure that you bring me first.

My body is on fire, one open nerve that you know how to stroke so well. I can feel it starting to happen. A race, then, to the finish.

The pressure is building. I can't... I can't... I need...

Words and thoughts fail me. Love and companionship slip away as the pleasure becomes so exquisite it is a type of pain.

You have done this to me. You have stripped me down to the hungry beast within my skin. A raw, aching, primal thing fills my head and my body and my soul.

The rhythmic slap slap slap of our bodies fills my every sense.

I am almost there.

Almost there.

Almost.

There.

A wordless roaring scream tears from my throat. I hear your echo.

Sweet release.

:rose:

This is another that would be good reformatted as a poem.
 
A first attempt so please be gentle, 199 words...

Eyes closed you feel yourself begin to spiral into the abyss, your head writhing against the soft pillow as your mind teeters on the edge of meltdown. Every sense heightened to the point of no return, your body alive to the wild sensations that pulse through you, each ripple sucking the air from your lung, rocking you to the core.

Breathless, an orchestra of whimpers and mewls escape your lips, your heaving bosom rising and falling, nipples pebbled, taut with desire, your body aching as you squirm and writhe.

The intensity of each wave crashes over you. Building and unrelenting, laying claim to every fibre of your body. The undulating roll of your hips in steady rhythm as the heat builds between your thighs. Pushing your head back as fingertips claw at the bed sheet, gripping tightly as you buck against the motion of his hungry, insatiable mouth. Your heavenly flower weeps with desire, succumbing to your desires.

A hand relinquishing the bed sheet, fingertips dancing through his hair as you push him onto you. Legs tense, mind and body finally submitting, body trembling and quivering as you lose yourself to that magical feeling that words can barely describe.

Good use of words and imagery, personally I don't like the perspective. I'd rather it was 1st person. Instead than being told what I'm feeling which just reminds me that I'm not, tell me how if feels in 1st person so I can imagine that I am that person... Happy writing.
 
She closed the door, nervously noticing all the unkempt details of her little studio. She hadn't planned this. Who does? He stood in front, ignoring her embarrassed glances at the clothes and unwashed dishes strewn about. Her back settled against the door and they shared an awkward moment as she nervously counted old splatters of morning coffee spilled on hardwood flooring nearby.

"Hi." He whispered.

She glanced up to his eyes, let out a nervous little laugh, and was about to reply when his hand came up to her face and bushed away a lock of hair. What had begun as a glance became a stare, burrowing through her pupils and into the depths of her soul as if in slow motion. His eyes would not release her as those fingers trailed down her temple. With tremendous strength she forced eyelids down into blackness as she tilted her cheek into his palm. A breath was sucked in through her teeth.

His palm gently cupped her face as if it were a breast, until those fingers curled and he ran a knuckle down the jawline to her chin and pulled her face back toward his eyes. A slight nudge woke her from that trance and as their eyes connected again she felt him close in. Her mouth opened for a kiss and once again her eyes closed. A breath blew against her as their lips met and he wrapped an arm around to pull her as she arched in toward him. His lips were gentle caresses.

He is a burley man with thick tattooed arms in a tribal pattern that stretched the fabric of his black T-shirt and she had expected something more forceful. A hard fuck to release weeks of built-up tension. Instead, he was making love to her lips, stubble on his chin gently scratching, until a tongue probed inward and she lost herself in the moment.

When their lips parted, fingers moved down her neck and across her blouse, circling a nipple clockwise. Her tummy clenched and she bent into his hand as a little moan escaped her lips, her hands running up and down that barrel chest of his. From her neck, he began unbuttoning the blouse all the way down until skin was exposed. Her nipples pierced out from behind the bra like embroidery.

"I expected something... different." She whispered.

"Something like this?"

He quickly turned her and she was pushed against the door. Palms rose up to break the forward movement and she sucked in a deep breath. Underneath that blouse, his hands trailed up and down her back, and she couldn't help but push her bottom out for him until a curve formed along the small of her back. His fingers reached underneath the fabric of her skirt and he yanked it down until it fell to a heap on the floor.

"Yes." She moaned, not sure if the comment was rhetorical or she was answering his question.

A knuckle stroked her sex over cheap and sensible flower print panties and she felt a flushing down there as a rush of heat opened and prepared her for him. The panties were soaked. He unzipped and she felt a throbbing hardness probe against her, rubbing across those panties where his finger had been. Her breath turned raspy in quick bursts and he pulled down that last cloth barrier between them over her thighs until it came to her ankles. She stepped out and widened her stance.

He probed again and she began to open. Her slickness offered no resistance to his prodding and soon he had slowly penetrated until his pelvis pushed her forward. Her head dropped and hair flowed across her face as she moaned helplessly.

"You like it gentle." He noted.

She looked over her shoulder and with a fierceness in her eyes, sternness in her face, and jaws clenched she commanded through her teeth, "Yes. But I also like it hard."

He smiled, a cocky and self-assured expression. She turned back, saw the door and closed her eyes.

"Fuck me," she said. "Fuck me until I'm jelly wriggling on the floor!"

He grabbed her hair and pushed until a cheek and her breasts were pressed against that door, grabbed her waist, and began a pounding that sounded like a sledgehammer demolishing the apartment. Her yelps of ecstasy echoed through the halls outside until a final scream of oblivion tore through her like a seizure that buckled her knees, causing more than one neighbor's door to open quizzically nearby. He gently lowered her hips down onto hardwood, towering above her, and she curled up in a fetal ball as she became that jelly on the floor, cooing in gasps, sweaty and spent, and didn't care a whit for what they thought.

"Do it again." She begged, gazing up into his eyes.


Good stuff!
 
It might be good, as you say, but it's more than 200 words.
The aim of the thread is to write the minimum to excite the reader to climax.;)

WTH? She gets a pass for playing outside the rules but I get my nose tweaked for expressing my enjoyment of it. Pardon me darlin' but I'm sensing a little cock bias here. Be sure you don't get that thing too close to my mouth or I might bite.
 
I swear if she doesn't shut her fucking mouth I'm going to shove something in it. M thought as he stood rigid with his back to her. How could someone so annoying turn him on so much he wondered. There she goes again, that's it. He practically ripped his hard cock out of his chef pants turned around and thought was deed. The look of surprise in her eyes turned to fascinated delight as she clamped down on him teeth bared. When she had his full attention she smiled. Now the real dance would begin. Who dominates? Who submits? Who cares as long as she starts sucking. He pushed his hips forward and she opened up. He kept his forward momentum until she began to gag and reached up to grasp his shaft. As he slowly withdrew her tongue cupped him and she brought her mouth around him. With warm caresses from her tongue and a tug on his hips she told him to fuck her mouth. He smiled down at her. With pleasure, he thought and thrust himself across her tongue while she applied just the right amount of resistance. The beautiful silence. Best five minutes of his life.

Well that's my 200 words. Don't know if it'll make anyone cum but I know who I'd be straddling if I had the equipment.
 
hi

I swear if she doesn't shut her fucking mouth I'm going to shove something in it. M thought as he stood rigid with his back to her. How could someone so annoying turn him on so much he wondered. There she goes again, that's it. He practically ripped his hard cock out of his chef pants turned around and thought was deed. The look of surprise in her eyes turned to fascinated delight as she clamped down on him teeth bared. When she had his full attention she smiled. Now the real dance would begin. Who dominates? Who submits? Who cares as long as she starts sucking. He pushed his hips forward and she opened up. He kept his forward momentum until she began to gag and reached up to grasp his shaft. As he slowly withdrew her tongue cupped him and she brought her mouth around him. With warm caresses from her tongue and a tug on his hips she told him to fuck her mouth. He smiled down at her. With pleasure, he thought and thrust himself across her tongue while she applied just the right amount of resistance. The beautiful silence. Best five minutes of his life.

Well that's my 200 words. Don't know if it'll make anyone cum but I know who I'd be straddling if I had the equipment.

excellent narration. can I read a caning followed by anal story from you please. consider that a s a reader fan request.
 
excellent narration. can I read a caning followed by anal story from you please. consider that a s a reader fan request.

Well I'm working on a story now. The anal is already there I'll see what I can do about the caning. Spanking was planned but as I'm not into real pain I'll have to do my research on caning. No promises.

Also, it's my cherry poppin' story so don't get your hopes up too high.
 
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