Male bisexuality and the Kinsey scale
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Nekidinaz
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Me too...
Likewise...I'm not into nor am I looking for an emotional attachement to another guy. I love females and I am married which is where my emotional attachment is.
I do enjoy m2m sexual fun, not every aspect of m2m sex, just a few, and I find them to be exciting, fun as well as erotic feeling. I would love to have a male friend with whom I could share some sexual pleasures now and then...mutual masturbation or handjobs, giving and receiving blowjobs and I would thoroughly enjoy being fucked too however, have no desires to reciprocate there.
So not sure where that puts me...a 1 or maybe a 2?
Likewise...I'm not into nor am I looking for an emotional attachement to another guy. I love females and I am married which is where my emotional attachment is.
I do enjoy m2m sexual fun, not every aspect of m2m sex, just a few, and I find them to be exciting, fun as well as erotic feeling. I would love to have a male friend with whom I could share some sexual pleasures now and then...mutual masturbation or handjobs, giving and receiving blowjobs and I would thoroughly enjoy being fucked too however, have no desires to reciprocate there.
So not sure where that puts me...a 1 or maybe a 2?
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Likewise...I'm not into nor am I looking for an emotional attachement to another guy. I love females and I am married which is where my emotional attachment is.
I do enjoy m2m sexual fun, not every aspect of m2m sex, just a few, and I find them to be exciting, fun as well as erotic feeling. I would love to have a male friend with whom I could share some sexual pleasures now and then...mutual masturbation or handjobs, giving and receiving blowjobs and I would thoroughly enjoy being fucked too however, have no desires to reciprocate there.
So not sure where that puts me...a 1 or maybe a 2?
xxxxx
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bimori
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Ike_The_Spike
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Interesting thread.
Here's a little background. I'm 54, so I came of age sexually in the '80s. It was more than a little complicated at that point as it was perfectly fine for women to be bi, but not guys. So I had a hard time exploring who I was.
I look back at that time and realize that I didn't allow myself to find men attractive because I would have been harassed more than I already was (I was bullied a lot in school). I've written about it previously, but my first sexual experience ended up being with my best friend when we were high.
That was more setup than I intended. I believe that if it weren't for major societal pressures for men to be attracted to either men or women fairly exclusively, we'd see a lot more fluidity in sexual attraction when it comes to men. Some of this is due to the straight community not being able to deal with men that want to be with men as well as women and the gay community not being able to deal with men wanting to be with women (by active choice) as well as men. The gatekeeping in the LGBTQ+ community can be exhausting.
I've gone through a lot of changes with my self-identification. For a long time I thought of myself as 'flexible', mostly because I couldn't accept I might be bisexual. Then when I was more open with myself, I saw myself as bisexual leaning toward women. As I've grown older I'm realizing the labels are probably holding me back (my experience, I'm not trying to say this belongs to anyone else). I could be pansexual as I don't care what someone's gender identity is anymore. If I find that person sexually attractive I just allow myself to be attracted, that person's gender identity isn't significant to that. So I'm just kind of arriving at queer now. It feels freeing, so I have hope at this point.
I also think the Kinsey Scale (scored a 3 btw) is limited. I found another that is less limited, but still limited IMHO. https://www.idrlabs.com/sexual-orientation/test.php (Your sexual orientation is 96.4% heterosexual, 82.1% homosexual, which places you in the bisexual quadrant.) These don't take into account attraction to trans or non-binary people. I'm guessing the results would be skewed because I've been super freaking horny without any contact with many people for a few months as well.
Most tests I've found deal with sexual attraction. I think sexual and romantic attraction are separate issues. Romantic attraction is probably still heavily influenced by societal pressure now. At least as much as sexual attraction has been in the past in this country. Although I've seen my romantic attraction changing in the past several years as well. I probably still lean to hetero-romantic, but I could easily see myself in queer relationships these days.
So back in the day, I may have been a 1 on the Kinsey scale. Now that I've accepted myself and my desires, I'm a 3.
Here's a little background. I'm 54, so I came of age sexually in the '80s. It was more than a little complicated at that point as it was perfectly fine for women to be bi, but not guys. So I had a hard time exploring who I was.
I look back at that time and realize that I didn't allow myself to find men attractive because I would have been harassed more than I already was (I was bullied a lot in school). I've written about it previously, but my first sexual experience ended up being with my best friend when we were high.
That was more setup than I intended. I believe that if it weren't for major societal pressures for men to be attracted to either men or women fairly exclusively, we'd see a lot more fluidity in sexual attraction when it comes to men. Some of this is due to the straight community not being able to deal with men that want to be with men as well as women and the gay community not being able to deal with men wanting to be with women (by active choice) as well as men. The gatekeeping in the LGBTQ+ community can be exhausting.
I've gone through a lot of changes with my self-identification. For a long time I thought of myself as 'flexible', mostly because I couldn't accept I might be bisexual. Then when I was more open with myself, I saw myself as bisexual leaning toward women. As I've grown older I'm realizing the labels are probably holding me back (my experience, I'm not trying to say this belongs to anyone else). I could be pansexual as I don't care what someone's gender identity is anymore. If I find that person sexually attractive I just allow myself to be attracted, that person's gender identity isn't significant to that. So I'm just kind of arriving at queer now. It feels freeing, so I have hope at this point.
I also think the Kinsey Scale (scored a 3 btw) is limited. I found another that is less limited, but still limited IMHO. https://www.idrlabs.com/sexual-orientation/test.php (Your sexual orientation is 96.4% heterosexual, 82.1% homosexual, which places you in the bisexual quadrant.) These don't take into account attraction to trans or non-binary people. I'm guessing the results would be skewed because I've been super freaking horny without any contact with many people for a few months as well.
Most tests I've found deal with sexual attraction. I think sexual and romantic attraction are separate issues. Romantic attraction is probably still heavily influenced by societal pressure now. At least as much as sexual attraction has been in the past in this country. Although I've seen my romantic attraction changing in the past several years as well. I probably still lean to hetero-romantic, but I could easily see myself in queer relationships these days.
So back in the day, I may have been a 1 on the Kinsey scale. Now that I've accepted myself and my desires, I'm a 3.
I took that test and scored 100% heterosexual and 0% homosexual. None of these tests ask any questions about transgender. I always assume that trans women are women and trans men are men so I answer the questions with those assumptions. I am definitely cock crazy when it comes to trans women though.
Wanking_Frank
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Scored a 2, but also took this other test
Your sexual orientation is 85.7% heterosexual, 42.9% homosexual, which places you in the heterosexual quadrant.
Not entirely surprised by this.
Your sexual orientation is 85.7% heterosexual, 42.9% homosexual, which places you in the heterosexual quadrant.
Not entirely surprised by this.
People reading accounts of famous ancient Greeks or Romans having both homosexual and heterosexual experiences often make remarks like "why were there so many more bisexual men back then than now." I doubt that they were - it was simply the case back then that a Kinsey 1-2 would occasionally indulge his lesser attraction to men because there was no stigma attached to doing so. In contrast, today, someone who is mostly heterosexual but with some attraction to men would be less likely to act on the latter because of the prevailing social attitude that requires you to identify as 100% straight (or 100% gay).
Religious fundamentalists often say that "homosexuality is a choice." This statement is half-true, but not in the sense that they intend: for a Kinsey 6 or even a 5, homosexuality is not a choice any more than heterosexuality is a choice for a Kinsey 0. It's true that for someone who is truly bisexually inclined, sexual behavior is a choice, and in today's society, a Kinsey 1 or 2 will probably choose to be exclusively straight, while because of opposite social pressures in the gay community, a Kinsey 4 or 5 may be almost exclusively homosexual. I'm not sure where that leaves a 3, i.e. someone equally happy with either. For men at least, as I said in my OP, I'm guessing that equally strong attraction to either is quite rare though not non-existent.
Religious fundamentalists often say that "homosexuality is a choice." This statement is half-true, but not in the sense that they intend: for a Kinsey 6 or even a 5, homosexuality is not a choice any more than heterosexuality is a choice for a Kinsey 0. It's true that for someone who is truly bisexually inclined, sexual behavior is a choice, and in today's society, a Kinsey 1 or 2 will probably choose to be exclusively straight, while because of opposite social pressures in the gay community, a Kinsey 4 or 5 may be almost exclusively homosexual. I'm not sure where that leaves a 3, i.e. someone equally happy with either. For men at least, as I said in my OP, I'm guessing that equally strong attraction to either is quite rare though not non-existent.
Jerseyshore
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I ignore Kinsey. Way too much if his data is based on homosexuality in prison, and too much of his youth sex was based on data from a ped. It is an example opf pseudo-science at best and basically a fraud at worst. Do some research.
GentlemanJedi63
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Sounds similar
I became aware of my same sex curiosity when I was 19, and struggled with denial, shame, embarrassment, guilt, and confusion for years. It wasn't until 2004 when I finally admitted my desires to myself, and felt that a weight had been lifted. But, I was still aware of societal expectations of being 100% straight or gay, and that caused further distress because I wasn't sure what label to put on myself. Was I gay, but enjoyed women? Was I just curious? Was I bisexual? Why did I have to be just one or the other? All sorts of questions went through my mind. I have gay friends that deny bisexuality is a possibility. You must be either straight or gay, but nothng else.
At this point (I'm 57), I am more open to the reality that sexuality is not limited to one particular orientation, interest, or lifestyle. Sexual attraction is sexual attraction, regardless of orientation. And as far as romantic relationships, the heart loves who it loves. Although I am more likely to be attracted to a woman for romantic attraction, I have to honestly consider that a man may fulfill that role as easily.
I became aware of my same sex curiosity when I was 19, and struggled with denial, shame, embarrassment, guilt, and confusion for years. It wasn't until 2004 when I finally admitted my desires to myself, and felt that a weight had been lifted. But, I was still aware of societal expectations of being 100% straight or gay, and that caused further distress because I wasn't sure what label to put on myself. Was I gay, but enjoyed women? Was I just curious? Was I bisexual? Why did I have to be just one or the other? All sorts of questions went through my mind. I have gay friends that deny bisexuality is a possibility. You must be either straight or gay, but nothng else.
At this point (I'm 57), I am more open to the reality that sexuality is not limited to one particular orientation, interest, or lifestyle. Sexual attraction is sexual attraction, regardless of orientation. And as far as romantic relationships, the heart loves who it loves. Although I am more likely to be attracted to a woman for romantic attraction, I have to honestly consider that a man may fulfill that role as easily.
Ike_The_Spike
Figuring it out
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I guess when we hit our 50's we start to figure things out a bit more. Would have been nice in my 20's.
SissySalina
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Took the first test got a 3, took the second test and it said 50% androphile and 82.1% gynophile so what is sissy?
bimori
Horndog
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got a 2
I agree that some of his data are garbage - cherry-picked by Kinsey or self-selecting bias with respect to those who volunteered. Kinsey's claim that about 10% of men are exclusively or almost exclusively homosexual is nonsense, all recent studies with scientific sampling and surveying methods suggest a number closer to 2-3%, for instance.
Having said that, the Kinsey scale is useful, because the straight, gay, bisexual classification fails to capture the fact that most "bisexuals" (at least bisexual men) have a strong preference for one or the other. The term "bisexual" isn't really useful if it includes both someone like Jack Kerouac, who was a skirt-chaser who'd sometimes let a guy blow him when he was horny, and someone like his buddy and fellow writer William Burroughs, who'd somewhat reluctantly have sex with women in his youth when young men weren't available.
Astroman72
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Took the second test and got:
Your sexual orientation is 100% heterosexual, 57.1% homosexual, which places you in the bisexual quadrant.
That's completely accurate for me. I'm attracted to women in every way, and I'm only attracted to men sexually, but it's a very strong sexual attraction. As I've said before, for me gay sex is like a super-exciting form of masturbation: there's no romantic or emotional intimacy involved, but the physical pleasure is overwhelming.
Your sexual orientation is 100% heterosexual, 57.1% homosexual, which places you in the bisexual quadrant.
That's completely accurate for me. I'm attracted to women in every way, and I'm only attracted to men sexually, but it's a very strong sexual attraction. As I've said before, for me gay sex is like a super-exciting form of masturbation: there's no romantic or emotional intimacy involved, but the physical pleasure is overwhelming.
In my case, most of my early sexual escapades were homosexual and in the '70s. Due to a military career in the pre-don't ask don't tell years, I went straight. Now that that nonsense is over, I'm bi. I don't advertise it publicly, but if asked, I don't deny it either.
Tinyharold46
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Scored a 2, which is probably accurate.
