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Millie's LGBTQ+ lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, intersex, asexual, and more discussion thread

XerXesXu said:
It's courteous to read the thread before contributing. I refer you to my post at #188.
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In other words, you can't repeat yourself, which you have done repeatedly. But you don't say you have friends that are LGBTQ, you state that you have family. Not the same thing.

I call my nephews and nieces by the names I’ve always called them; there’s no drama about dead-naming or misgendering. Because no one is trying to give or take offence or browbeat the other, no one notices.
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So it can be inferred you have no friends that aren't white, straight, middle class, since you won't answer a direct question about it.
 
theWollstonecraftWoman said:
In other words, you can't repeat yourself, which you have done repeatedly. But you don't say you have friends that are LGBTQ, you state that you have family. Not the same thing.


So it can be inferred you have no friends that aren't white, straight, middle class, since you won't answer a direct question about it.
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A more realistic inference is that I have relatives, neighbours, friends etc who are 'bakla and tomboys' which is the expression used here to embrace LBQT etc, and that I interact with them on a daily basis, which I do. Does that help?
 
Bramblethorn said:
When people say something like "misgendering is violence", they're not saying that it's something that will break bones; rather, they're pointing out this link between the language and the physical violence. Even when the person using slurs/misgendering isn't trying to threaten, they're still giving cover to those who do, and evoking fight-or-flight responses for people who've experienced previous violence.
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This is my first post on this thread, so I'd better say at the outset that I'm in favour of using a person's preferred pronouns.

The problem with the example you've just described is that there's a perfectly good word for the mafia behaviour you've described - 'intimidation'. If you say 'misgendering is intimidation' then it's pretty easy to look at that statement and go 'Yep, I see what is meant'. You can also say 'misgendering carries the threat of violence' if you want to make the link absolutely explicit.

The reasons you cite for the community choosing to use 'violence' over gentler alternatives may come from a place of experiencing both real violence and real intimidation and I can see why people might want to use it. But ultimately it's an attempt at redefining a word so it can be pressed into service for a cause and if you choose to use the word in this context then you either have to give the whole long speech about the theoretical underpinnings of it, or you have to risk people just going 'no, it isn't.'

If we now say something like 'He was violently assaulted' - what actually happened? If violence is speech and assault can be verbal, possibly not what we used to think.

A similar thing has happened with the word Nazi. Jordan Peterson (to take a name at random) might have reprehensible right-wing views, he might be someone you want to argue against but he's probably not a card-carrying National Socialist. All that happens by the words overuse is that you end up reading articles about someone like Nick Griffin and it takes you longer than it should to go 'Nope, this guy actually is a Nazi' - and with more of them about these days seemingly, it's good to have that clarity.

Going back (don't worry, quickly) to the Tolerance article, surely the point is that tolerance isn't an absolute binary thing - there are clearly things that should not be tolerated (such as the overthrow of democracy or defaecating in the gazpacho soup at a gentile dinner party), but generally a la Popper we want as broad a net of tolerance as reasonably possible. The cry of 'I won't tolerate the intolerant' is a cry for those, mostly on the left, who want the net of tolerance drawn much closer than has traditionally been the case.
 
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XerXesXu said:
A more realistic inference is that I have relatives, neighbours, friends etc who are 'bakla and tomboys' which is the expression used here to embrace LBQT etc, and that I interact with them on a daily basis, which I do. Does that help?
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no, not really, you don't tell us how you interact, if you browbeat them, if you are polite, if you call them what and how they wish to be addressed. Tomboys, in this country, doesn't indicate necessarily that a person is lesbian. and I haven't a clue what a bakla is, so I googled it, it's Filipino for queer. But again, interacting doesn't indicate getting along or being friends. It doesn't tell me if you like them or they like you. Your a Brit and Brits have their fair share of bigots, misogynist, homophobic, transphobic, and xenophobic individuals.

I haven't a clue what you are and by your penchant for argumentative conversations, I doubt much of what you say, no matter what it is you are saying.
 
theWollstonecraftWoman said:
no, not really, you don't tell us how you interact, if you browbeat them, if you are polite, if you call them what and how they wish to be addressed. Tomboys, in this country, doesn't indicate necessarily that a person is lesbian. and I haven't a clue what a bakla is, so I googled it, it's Filipino for queer. But again, interacting doesn't indicate getting along or being friends. It doesn't tell me if you like them or they like you. Your a Brit and Brits have their fair share of bigots, misogynist, homophobic, transphobic, and xenophobic individuals.

I haven't a clue what you are and by your penchant for argumentative conversations, I doubt much of what you say, no matter what it is you are saying.
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I'm all for not caring, so even at the risk of causing offence - I don't care. It works for me, it can work for others.
 
I have a lot of gay and lesbian friends. Less of the transgender variety, but still quite a few. I'm amazed by them and their resilience to criticism by judgmental people. I also have begun to realize how hurtful some folks are to them without actually trying to be. How much more hurtful are those who are intentionally cruel?

Now, can we stop discussing CIS issues and return to what I set up the thread to discuss?
 
No, actually, it doesn't. Like when you called me some derogatory term for when I was a prostitute as a runaway child. It hurt! And I can't help but be hurt by such bullshit from a bullshitter. And your inability to understand that makes you a vicious, uncaring bastard. Willing to insult because you don't care, willing to hurt because it doesn't affect you to hurt others. There are no repercussions to be impolite here. You're banding about right on the edge of what draws warnings hoping we draw the warning by responding to you.
XerXesXu said:
I'm all for not caring, so even at the risk of causing offence - I don't care. It works for me, it can work for others.
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Now please, go make your own fucking thread and comment there! But I won't know you did, because you are on ignore. Only the second person I've ignored.
 
You see a post by an asshole in the morning, you saw a post by an asshole. You see, everyone posting is being an asshole to you all day, you're the asshole.
 
XerXesXu said:
It's a shame Millie won't see this, but it's the perfect example of exercising coercive control (bullying) by way of appeal to harmony. And you've done it to her.
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No, you did it to her. You hijacked her thread, bullied and harassed everyone in here. If I knew how to report you, I would!

Such a noodge, nudnik schmuck.
 
XerXesXu said:
I'm all for not caring, so even at the risk of causing offence - I don't care. It works for me, it can work for others.
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You’re that asshole who would fart loud in restaurant and demand you have the right to do so.

Pull my finger 🖕

(I’d apologize for being rude but I know you can handle it. 😉)
 
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To put the thread back on track, over 40 years ago, in college, I worked in an armed services YMCA. As a lanky 19 year old working there, I learned there were all kinds of interesting people. And that they were people, not some stereotype. I was part of my growing experience. And that it was a good lesson in exercising the Golden Rule. A rule which, I gather, is hated by many today.

And remember to not give the sealion oxygen.
 
Zootonius said:
To put the thread back on track, over 40 years ago, in college, I worked in an armed services YMCA. As a lanky 19 year old working there, I learned there were all kinds of interesting people. And that they were people, not some stereotype. I was part of my growing experience. And that it was a good lesson in exercising the Golden Rule. A rule which, I gather, is hated by many today.

And remember to not give the sealion oxygen.
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Oh crap, now you've planted the Village People in my head, YMCA and In the Navy are running through my mind. So, your the one to blame here, Zoo...


 
Zootonius said:
To put the thread back on track, over 40 years ago, in college, I worked in an armed services YMCA. As a lanky 19 year old working there, I learned there were all kinds of interesting people. And that they were people, not some stereotype. I was part of my growing experience. And that it was a good lesson in exercising the Golden Rule. A rule which, I gather, is hated by many today.

And remember to not give the sealion oxygen.
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Really, you possibly served me.

I've no idea what 'sealion' means in the vocabulary of yoof'speak, but the last person to use it was Feralsmile. When I quoted him he fled in terror to a safe space. There's an old French saying 'Cet animal est très méchant, Quand on l'attaque il se défend.' Sealions are animals too. You'd be wise to confine your abuse to the toothless. Oh, and thanks for the oxygen, never mind the fish.
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