Multiple Spouses/Partners

[Rozalin_0123]

I am a 33 year old female who lives a particular taboo livestyle. I have two spouses, a husband and a wife. We live together, share our bed together, and we are completely happy with each other. From a legal standpoint, I'm only married to my husband, but we had a ceremony performed in which the three of us were married together. Means nothing on paper, but to us it's everything.

A little over a year ago, my wife gave birth to a set of twins, a boy and a girl. My husband and I tried for years to conceive but I never could. Doctors diagnosed me with PCOS when I was 22. I love them as my own children, because to me they are.

I originally came to Lit because of all the people who think outside the box when it comes to sex. It's been a nice escape from a world that not only hates on you for being bi-sexual, but also because of having two lovers. "That's not love, that's lust" they say, who the fuck are you to tell me how I feel? I dread the days when my kids get older, having to grow up in a intolerant world. Thankfully, they have 3 loving parents that will do everything to see that live a happy, healthy, and meaningful life.

Despite Lit's community having a broad range of sexual perferences, I find it odd that a lot of the time when I mention I have multiple spouses while chatting with someone the conversation stops right there. On a site where incest, bdsm, furrys, and homosexuality are the norm, why is polygamy such a deal breaker?

So I started this thread in the hopes of maybe finding others who live this sort of lifestyle. Not necessarily exactly the same as me, but mostly multiple partners where everyone knows about each other and are perfectly happy with it.

 

[Spins]

We all have a drinking problem.

 

[lovetoread]

I am a 33 year old female who lives a particular taboo livestyle. I have two spouses, a husband and a wife. We live together, share our bed together, and we are completely happy with each other. From a legal standpoint, I'm only married to my husband, but we had a ceremony performed in which the three of us were married together. Means nothing on paper, but to us it's everything.

A little over a year ago, my wife gave birth to a set of twins, a boy and a girl. My husband and I tried for years to conceive but I never could. Doctors diagnosed me with PCOS when I was 22. I love them as my own children, because to me they are.

I originally came to Lit because of all the people who think outside the box when it comes to sex. It's been a nice escape from a world that not only hates on you for being bi-sexual, but also because of having two lovers. "That's not love, that's lust" they say, who the fuck are you to tell me how I feel? I dread the days when my kids get older, having to grow up in a intolerant world. Thankfully, they have 3 loving parents that will do everything to see that live a happy, healthy, and meaningful life.

Despite Lit's community having a broad range of sexual perferences, I find it odd that a lot of the time when I mention I have multiple spouses while chatting with someone the conversation stops right there. On a site where incest, bdsm, furrys, and homosexuality are the norm, why is polygamy such a deal breaker?

So I started this thread in the hopes of maybe finding others who live this sort of lifestyle. Not necessarily exactly the same as me, but mostly multiple partners where everyone knows about each other and are perfectly happy with it.

I fully believe in living the polyamory lifestyle.

One has the ability to love more than one partner at a time.

 

[Mr Noone]

...On a site where incest, bdsm, furrys, and homosexuality are the norm, why is polygamy such a deal breaker?...

Those things aren't norms. People's fantasies about them are the norm. Your lifestyle presents a reality that is out of synch with the norm, and that frightens people in a way that fantasy doesn't.

 

[Noor]

We all have a drinking problem.

I don't drink but I suspect I am extreme minority here in that. Lit was a lot more fun when more people were sober. 2003-2004.

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

Why do you need a bunch of strangers to validate your lifestyle?

 

[Super-Surprise]

Luxey is that you?


Can you say Reincarnation?

 

[Noor]

I fully believe in living the polyamory lifestyle.

One has the ability to love more than one partner at a time.

I agree. Love is love it needn't be exclusive or limited. Relationships should be defined only by those within them and bound by the agreements they make with each other.

I don't like labels and boxes. I think people are very frightened of what they can not understand, many people barely love themselves so loving one other is a big step, loving more than one is unthinkable.

Within Lit, as I see in the real world, it is ok to be in a monogamous serious relationship and it's ok to be promiscuous. It also seems to be somewhat ok to add a 3rd person of lessor importance to a couple relationship, but not to have a relationship of more than two equal partners. I think this threatens people.
Not everyone here is that way though.

 

[Noor]

Usually the only people who truly understand and accept bisexuality tend to be other bisexuals.

 

[lovetoread]

I agree. Love is love it needn't be exclusive or limited. Relationships should be defined only by those within them and bound by the agreements they make with each other.

I don't like labels and boxes. I think people are very frightened of what they can not understand, many people barely love themselves so loving one other is a big step, loving more than one is unthinkable.

Within Lit, as I see in the real world, it is ok to be in a monogamous serious relationship and it's ok to be promiscuous. It also seems to be somewhat ok to add a 3rd person of lessor importance to a couple relationship, but not to have a relationship of more than two equal partners. I think this threatens people.
Not everyone here is that way though.

Agreed totally.

It's one thing to read or even write about things but if it's real, that's something people have a hard time with.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

We all have a drinking problem.

Yes we do. And the more I drink the lower my sexual standards decline. But being in 2 blissful marriages at once seems too much to bear, or bare...both seem wrong, wrong.

 

[Pairaclities]

Yes we do. And the more I drink the lower my sexual standards decline. But being in 2 blissful marriages at once seems too much to bear, or bare...both seem wrong, wrong.

See now I'm more of a whatever floats your boat type of person.
I would have dearly liked to give this poly marriage thing a go however my wife will not. She feels it would be wrong. Then again she is not into sex with a women either, so it would be difficult to be 3 in a bed.
So I respect that and can't participate.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

See now I'm more of a whatever floats your boat type of person.
I would have dearly liked to give this poly marriage thing a go however my wife will not. She feels it would be wrong. Then again she is not into sex with a women either, so it would be difficult to be 3 in a bed.
So I respect that and can't participate.

Have you floated the 2 men in a boat past her? Maybe it's the ratio she abhors.

 

[Rozalin_0123]

Why do you need a bunch of strangers to validate your lifestyle?

I don't need anyone to validate it, it would just be nice to be able to chat with like minded or even open minded individuals about the subject.

 

[Pairaclities]

Have you floated the 2 men in a boat past her? Maybe it's the ratio she abhors.

Well yes I did, with great trepidation. She still declined, it is a moral judgement.
Unfortunately that scenario also sinks my boat.
So we respect each others wishes.

 

[gagginforit]

I support your right to live in whatever way you choose as consenting adults.

 

[1sickbastard]

Polyamory is just wrong, mixing Greek and Latin terms.
It ought to be polyphilia or multiamory, strictly speaking.

In the end, though, it doesn't matter what it's called. If it works then good for you.

 

[Phelia]

The really weird part is that we'll cheer on and glorify shows like The Bachelor that are essentially a documentation of someone testing out a power-imbalanced polyamorous relationship. And they always say "I never thought it was possible to love two people at once, but I really can't choose!" But then people freak out if it's something consenting adults get into behind closed doors. I think a lot of people just aren't meant to be monogamous, and the ones who acknowledge it seem to be pretty happy.

Maybe it's because of lack of exposure, but I do question the long-term stability of those relationships, which would give me concerns about introducing children into the equation (not directed at OP - sounds like you have a very loving, special family ). A primary partnership of two just sounds simpler to maintain, to me. The n-body problem. Then again, two-person relationships are stable as often as they aren't, so who knows.

Who wants to start up a commune with me, like the one described in that article posted in the Good Reads thread where everyone just gives each other orgasms all the time as part of some pleasure-zen ritual?

 

[Mr Noone]

...
Who wants to start up a commune with me, like the one described in that article posted in the Good Reads thread where everyone just gives each other orgasms all the time as part of some pleasure-zen ritual?

If you ask nicely.

 

[Phelia]

Polyamory is just wrong, mixing Greek and Latin terms.
It ought to be polyphilia or multiamory, strictly speaking.

In the end, though, it doesn't matter what it's called. If it works then good for you.

I've never thought about that! Polyamory IS wrong! Well that changes everything.

 

[Mr Noone]

I've never thought about that! Polyamory IS wrong! Well that changes everything.

It's English. What can you expect? At least they got polyglot and multilingual right. Though why we need two foreign words for the same thing is a mystery.

 

[Phelia]

It's English. What can you expect? At least they got polyglot and multilingual right. Though why we need two foreign words for the same thing is a mystery.

Things get complicated in polylingual relationships.

 

[IrezumiKiss]

I don't need anyone to validate it, it would just be nice to be able to chat with like minded or even open minded individuals about the subject.

Not in the life, but I champion and advocate it, when all concerned are responsible, progressive-minded and fun-loving adults on the same/similar lusty vibe.

You might find more snark here than sincerity, but keep on doing you. Ain't no shame in your game!

 

[Mr Noone]

Things get complicated in polylingual relationships.

C'est vrai. Truly.

 

[StrangeLife]

The really weird part is that we'll cheer on and glorify shows like The Bachelor ...

Ehh... no.