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There's a great essay in the Writer's Resources area called 'How to make characters talk'. I think that would help with the formatting of this, which is a little hard to read (also 'surly' means grumpy). Otherwise... I don't really know what Jill and Edith look like, how they're feeling, why they're so turned on, and so on - maybe just imagine that he doesn't have an enormous cock (difficult for most of us, I know) and sweet semen and write the scene like the physical attributes are just an added extra to their passion and personalities? If it's hot without the characters being caricatures, it will be hotter for more readers, I reckon. Just my 2 cents.
Thank you. The character development is actually in the upper part of the story. This was a small sex scene. I should have set my stage better for readers to comment. My thought process was to show a snipet of a sex scene. Again poor choice by me
Thank you for the feedback. If you want to see the protagonist Jim and Jill and Edith, please look at my other 3 chapters. Thanks again.
 
On a wing and a prayer, my first effort at dystopian Science Fiction was published today. Kind of John Wyndham's The Chrysalids meets The Handmaid's Tale with traces of Anne McCaffrey I've decided, though I wasn't consciously thinking of any of those when I wrote it.

Part 1 is a sex-free slow burn lesbian romance.
 
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Today I'm releasing the first part of a new story series. It's my first time delving more seriously into reluctance and I'm genuinely quite nervous about what people are gonna think.

It's a scifi story about two agents who go undercover to blow open a sexual slavery organization and takes place in the same universe as my ongoing series "Comfort in the new world" (https://www.literotica.com/s/comfort-in-the-new-world-ch-01)

"Submission to the people part 1" can be found here: https://www.literotica.com/s/submission-to-the-people-pt-01
 
It's been a bit since I've posted anything, I took a small break, plus some real life issues came up as well. But I am pleased to announce that Tiafell - The Femboy Elf Ch. 17 is now live!

TIafell and his friends have been training in the Amazonian Village of Steelweld for seven months now. All of them have grown stronger in their own ways, but Tiafell has soared above the rest due to his elf/demon genetics. However, the wizard Marlon has at last summoned them to his tower to teach them the art of magic. After receiving a "double helping of meat" from Cirris and Brion, Tiafell travels with his friends to finally see the elderly wizard, who shares shocking information with them all.

Hope everyone enjoys, comments and feedback are welcome as always!
 
“The Meet and Greet” is my first erotic story, based on a fantasy that a Lit Crush and I used to discuss about what our first meeting would be like.

Interestedly, one of the comments I received is that it’s well written but too short! I’m grateful for this kind of feedback, looking forward to additional thoughts.

Hope you enjoy!

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-meet-and-greet-1
 
I recently had a new story published in my shared literary universe. If you're fans of authors like Erenisch and Fernando, then hopefully this story helps scratch that itch with a world that's egalitarian (for non-slaves at least) instead of aggressively sexist and fascist.

The basic synopsis/plot for the story is a man taking his slave girl for a walk on a leash around his neighborhood. Its told from the perspective of the slave girl. It is set in a world where sex slavery is legal, with various medical and technological advancements designed to make owning and maintaining a slave easier for your average person. The story has also been proofread by one of literotica's best editors. It incorporates a variety of themes, including exhibitionism, humiliation, public sex, and more. The story briefly references my previous story, The Girl Washer Appliance, but its not required reading.

You can read 'The Neighborhood Walk' here: https://www.literotica.com/s/the-neighborhood-walk

I hope you enjoy it!
 
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https://classic.literotica.com/s/the-unexpected-girlfriend-ch-01

This was inspired by previous City College stories, specifically the series My Summer with Nora and College Hooking Memories. The setting of a university in the 1970s shapes what happens to the characters. The photo below shows the South Campus when it was still the Manhattanville College of the Sacred Heart, a Catholic women's school. The big building with the white cupola in the middle became the Finley Student Center, which is often used as a setting. The building behind it and a bit to the left became Wagner Hall, where Nora and Paul first meet in this story. Beyond that is St. Nicholas Park and then Central Harlem down the hill. Most of the buildings in this picture have since been replaced.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/68/Ccnysc1.jpg/737px-Ccnysc1.jpg
 
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Posted today in Group Sex is “A Unicorn Goes Hunting.”

https://www.literotica.com/s/a-unicorn-goes-hunting

Elise is a single woman, 28 but with varied experiences. Those events have taught her about herself, and her wants and needs. Her goals now are to form a close relationship with a man, yet also express her bisexuality as a third with married MF couples. This is a standalone story, about 6900 words. Enjoy!
 
Tiafell - The Femboy Elf Ch. 18 is now live!

After awakening from another nightmare involving Dred, Tiafell and his friends begin their magic training under Marlon. At first, things seem easy enough, their day begins with academics to broaden their minds. But when the actual training starts, it becomes apparent that Tiafell’s demonic nature is more of a threat than they thought. Will Tiafell be able to learn how to reign that side of himself in?

Comments and feedback are welcome, enjoy!
 
My Erotic Slice-of-Life Novella ‘Her Pampered Princess’

Link: Her Pampered Princess - Part One


I’m excited to announce that I will be serializing this work on Lit, with two to three chapters published every week! 🌺

A brief overview of the story:

The unruly Princess Henriette returns home suddenly, bearing many secrets that her stepsister, the elegant and chaste Princess Virginie, is determined to uncover—one confession at a time.

You’ll enjoy my story (hopefully!) if you like:

🌸 Light BDSM elements: tickling, playful ENF, and a bit of vibrator bondage

🎭 Character dynamics: bratty, rebellious girls paired with shy, proper ones—with a unique twist

💕 Step-sibling romance: with a backstory that makes their connection feel genuine

😂 Witty teasing and playful banter that will curl your lips with a smile, because of how sweet they are

🌹 Intimate, romantic, and fulfilling lesbian scenes: with a focus on connection and passion

🏰 Lush, detailed aristocratic settings: think old-world grandeur with a modern twist

🏛️ The Roman Empire: yes, it’s more than just a backdrop—I promise the Roman Empire plays a significant role in the plot!
 
My Erotic Slice-of-Life Novella ‘Her Pampered Princess’

Link: Her Pampered Princess - Part One


I’m excited to announce that I will be serializing this work on Lit, with two to three chapters published every week! 🌺

A brief overview of the story:

The unruly Princess Henriette returns home suddenly, bearing many secrets that her stepsister, the elegant and chaste Princess Virginie, is determined to uncover—one confession at a time.

You’ll enjoy my story (hopefully!) if you like:

🌸 Light BDSM elements: tickling, playful ENF, and a bit of vibrator bondage

🎭 Character dynamics: bratty, rebellious girls paired with shy, proper ones—with a unique twist

💕 Step-sibling romance: with a backstory that makes their connection feel genuine

😂 Witty teasing and playful banter that will curl your lips with a smile, because of how sweet they are

🌹 Intimate, romantic, and fulfilling lesbian scenes: with a focus on connection and passion

🏰 Lush, detailed aristocratic settings: think old-world grandeur with a modern twist

🏛️ The Roman Empire: yes, it’s more than just a backdrop—I promise the Roman Empire plays a significant role in the plot!
That's a hell of an advertisement. I'll check it out.
 
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