Oral Sex = Slight Problem

[Cracker84]

Well I really don't know how this problem could be fixed but oh well I'll give it a shot...


I've been with my gf now for a couple months and a few days ago after fingering her for the second time she decided she would return the favor. As she got down and looked at my dick she had well a bit of a problem... she said it was too big.
As funny as this may seem its true, she said she couldn't fit any of it in her mouth. I mean she is a small girl but I was well, surprised and we both laughed at first. Then I realized I'm going to be missing out on a lot of fun down the road. I mean is there anyway to well help her out or make her want to try to take it, I'm lost on this one.


Another thing I'm wondering.... is it normal for girls to twitch or move freakishly every single time you rub there clit. I mean it seems she can't stand her clit being touched for more then 5-7 seconds at a time. I asked her and she said she doesn't know why she freaks out and can't stay relaxed.

P.S. Not sure yet how far she has gotten in the past sexually, I'm guessin she just maybe new to all this or not that well experienced. Something I'll try and find out and maybe answer some of my own questions....

But Any feed back on either of these problems will help.

 

[Snowballz]

Im not sure what to suggest about your penis being too big to fit...maybe lots n lots n lots of lube? lol
But the thing about the clit i think because the clit is so sensitive its hard for her to controll herself and i dont know..so much energy going there or something. But i wouldnt be playing with it for more then 5-7 seconds anyway..dont focus on just that..yes touch it play with it tease it..but dont focus on it...then again im not an expert. =) Good luck mate.

 

[dollface007]

Hmmm...you sound pretty inexperienced yourself considering that you've been seeing her for a couple months and have no clue whether she's even had sex before, and considering that you have never seen a woman react to having her clit touched. Correct me if i'm wrong.

You should talk to each other about your sexual histories BEFORE you get intimate physically. Also a woman's clit is the most sensitive place you can touch on her body. She's not "freaking out" as you say...she's simply reacting NORMALLY to stimulation. You have to be extremely gentle when you're touching this part of her body...it's basically like taking all the nerve endings in your cock and concentrating them into a little area that's about the size of the tip of your pinky finger. Directly touching the clitoris can be too much for some women to take. Most women prefer if you lick their clit with your tongue b/c it's much softer than your fingers. If she doesn't want you touching her clit for more than a few seconds at a time, you're probably using too much pressure.

As for the oral sex problem, she doesn't have to put all of you in her mouth at once. She can suck on just the tip and let her hand do the rest, or lick you all over.

 

[Cracker84]

@ Doll.. Yeah I guess you can say were both pretty inexperienced, as far as talkin about who we've been with well we got into this relationship fast and really haven't crossed my mind but your right on talkin about that before we got physical.

As far as telling her she doesn't have to take my cock all the way I told her that and she just said she couldn't get any of it. I think its just that she maybe knew to it and still be weiry of giving oral sex. Any suggestions on how to maybe convince her to try again...

I think your right though about how much pressure and what I do with her clit. I tried tips from other threads about how to massage it and touch it at different times but its hard to do when you can't have contact with it for more then 5 seconds.

Using my tongue instead of fingers maybe the answer.. have to experiment on that one. Thx for the suggestions keep em comin.

 

[Meat Whistler]

If she licks you and plays with you a lot, she should be able to slide you in better. But, if not, use a lot of lube and she'll be fine, especially if you have an average-large cock.

Edited for proper continuity.

 

[warrior queen]

ok, if she really does have too small a mouth to fit your girth...
then it's up to you to give her suggestions to try alternate things that feel good for you.

why not have her encircle your length with both hands, well lubed and warm, while she licks and sucks all around the head of your cock?
feels very similar to having a blowjob (or so i'm told by a few ex's) and solves the problem - at least for now.

have a bit of imagination, and see what else you two can come up with!

i have met a few women who have very small mouths and absolutely cannot fit their SO's cock in -
it's not as uncommon as you might think!

but with all of them, a little experimentation to see what feels just as good has solved the issue.

 

[SIC]

Well i am sry to tell you this but if you are to big and i got the same thing trust me there wont be many blowjobs. At the beggining i was getting them but then she stop because it was to hard and it kinda made me mad because i always went down on her. Then the problem is positions there are some many that you have to be careful on because if you get to much into the moment you will press to hard and then it is all over for that time. Trust me sometime being big suck but it other cases its good!

 

[Guest]

 

[Willing and Unsure]

I've been informed on several occasions that I have a small mouth. I've also been with a rather large guy before too (he was as big around as one of my wrists.... no joke). It's one of those things that when the large cock is first unveiled there's like this whole bit of shock that comes with it. Face it, there's a lot of women just expecting average size (at least me anyways) despite what is said beforehand about it. Really, when that happens, it's easiest to start with the hands, rubbing, feeling, massaging, exploring. There's all sorts of different things she can do. Hell, she can even try sucking on your balls, biting your inner thigh (gently), stroking you, and then going from there if she thinks you're too big. Seriously now, there are so many different ways to tease a man without actually putting his dick in your mouth. I've dragged out a blow job on several occasions to be around 2 hours long just so I can tease and enjoy every second of it just like he is and leave him wanting so much more when it's all over.

Think of it this way, there's plenty of ways to tease a woman, but there's just as many to tease a man.

 

[wicked woman]

Originally posted by Hooch
There's no reason to think that swallowing a cock whole is the only way you can define "oral sex". Nibbling, nuzzling, licking, wet sloppy kisses along the shaft and the head can feel pretty damn good. (Or so I am told. It's been a while....) And the slick, lubed hand job at the same time (as Warrior Queen suggested) can be spectacular.

As far as HER? My man, the female genitalia is a damn amusement park in a small area. When *I* go to Busch Gardens, I don't ride the same rollercoaster over and over, although I have my favorites. The same is true here.... Tease the inside of her thighs, bite and nibble at that tendon where her hip and thighs join, make love to her lips and slit, inner and outer. Revel in the colors and taste and smell of her. Go EASY on the clit, too much stimulation can be awful for her. Find a nice easy rhythm, then as she's gettig in to it, break it. Tease the hell out of her. Use your tongue, your lips, your teeth (gently with the teeth), your fingers, your face. Murmur to her, tell her you enjoy her. Pay attention to her body, feel how she responds, go with the motion of her hips, listen to her sighs and moans. When "gentle and teasing" gets to be too much (or not enough), when she has to have MORE, she'll let you know, through words or actions. She'll tell you, through her responses, what she likes and what feels the best.

Every woman is different, and the joy of being with someone new is learning all about them. Be patient, considerate, caring. ENJOY her. If she knows you are truly enjoying HER, not doing it for your own ego, or because you expect something in return, then she will relax and enjoy herself, give of herself, trust in you. Trusting is wonderful, and it opens so many doors.

Make love to her. Making love is giving, not taking. There will be times for just having a good old time in bed, take-the-edge-off sex, and of out-and-out *fucking*, but as you are getting to know someone? Make love to her, my friend. That's what it's all about.

Sorry to be so long-winded. I just have strong feelings about pleasing a woman.

Hooch

Please don't apologize for being long-winded, Hooch. Hopefully some women will be the recipient of your sage advice.

 

[Bobmi357]

You don't eat an ice-cream cone by swallowing it whole. Nope instead you lick a little here, a little there. Perhaps you're too big to have her deep throat you, but there is nothing to say she still can't go to town on you like an ice-cream cone.

 

[Woodmiester]

"..... At the beggining i was getting them but then she stop because it was to hard and it kinda made me mad because i always went down on her. ....."

I don't usually do what I'm about to, but this begs for it and I'm surprised no one else has said anything.....

What the fucks wrong with you? Beside the point that it's clear your giving her tongue just to get a BJ in return which is good, cause when she finalllly meets a guy like me that will treat her with respect and care, you'd be history.......

That said, this guy is asking for advice and while some of what we all see given as such is garbage, for the most part it's real, but he is admiting he and her are both new and giving this advice to someone that is just learning is in poor taste.

If she's never done it or has been pressured to give oral she might be scared or freaked out by the possibility of having a cock in her mouth so I'd think as has been said..... take time

No need to rush. Maybe get into a 69 position and eat her. Be on the bottom so she can rest her head on your thigh and she can stroke you as she wants, lick or try to take you in her mouth, but at her pace, all he should be thinking is how good he's making her feel. As was said before, use the tongue and use it to make love. Learn what area's of her pussy makes her react the best. The shivering or shaking means she is excited and you have to learn if it's a good shiver or one of almost non-pleasure, and if so back away from the clit. Slide the tongue up and down between her lips, on the outside of them and over them. Spread her open and run it around the rim of her vaginal opening, dart your tongue in and out and then start over. If her clit becomes over excited, there's a tiny area just before it that if touched will make her pussy contract or "raise up" almost. Learn where the g-spot is and how to rub it and treat it. Don't be worried about spending time giving her oral pleasure. 10 minutes if bullshit too. Think an hour, or two or even three. Combine the use of your tongue with your fingers and or toys or have her use her fingers to rub her clit while you use your tongue. And don't worry about getting a blowjob in return, that's a piss poor reason to ever give her oral.

As for her mouth size verses your cock, if your hung like a pony sush is life. You'll soon find that maybe some like to stroke it but most women shy from sucking or fucking a huge cock, and if this is the case before you pressure her into it think about causing her injury. Nothing like a torn corner of the mouth to ruin a good night.

I'm of normal size but seems, or I've been told the head of my cock is rather large, I dunno. But from side to side it can get to almost 2 3/4" so most kinda turn their head to the side to take it in, but once the crown is past their lips it's easy enough to take the shaft in as they want. So take your time, allow yourself and her to learn.

 

[Arden]

Woodmeister, Hooch, dollface, warrior queen and Willing and Unsure gave you a lot of very good information.

I suspect that she has little, if any experience in giving oral sex. Women aren't born with these skills, they have to learn how at a pace that works for them. It can take months for a young girl to get comfortable with oral sex with a caring partner. There's nothing wrong with exploring each other's bodies gently, without expectation, and letting things happen naturally.

I may be wrong, but I think guys, because of exposure to porn and buddy talk, want to experience oral sex before many girls their age are ready to give it. There's a certain "yuck" factor with some girls... "You want me to put that in MY mouth? You pee through it!" For some, it's a hard to deal with.

The ablilty to give good oral sex is a form of art. It takes willingness, practice, and knowing what their partner enjoys. I think Willing and Unsure made a good point... she could hold you in her hands, and make love to the head of your cock even if she can't fit all of it inside. And you can lavish her with praise for her efforts. Accepting what she can do, each time, might make her willing to try more...

Because size may be a problem, don't be tempted to try and fuck her mouth. That's an area left best to those with a lot of experience. There's no better way to scare off a good, yet inexperienced partner, than trying to force the issue.

You may also want to read the following thread, or have her read it... https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=83544

As far as her having an extremely sensetive clit, some women do. She may also be worried about how she tastes, or be uneasy about it because she's embarrased to have a guy right there in front of her, seeing everything in close detail. Many young women aren't comfortable with how they look. It'a normal for them to be a bit embarassed. You might try making love to her with your fingers and mouth at the same time... explore her pussy with your fingers gently while making love to her clit. It might be just the mental distraction that she needs to be able to enjoy the feeling of your tongue on her clit.

When I was younger, I used to think I had a very sensitive clit... but I was mistaking ticklishness for sexual response. Once you can relax and enjoy the true sensations (totally different) there's a whole new world to explore. Sensations that can make you vibrate from your head to your toes if your partner is willing to take the time to learn how you respond to their touch. Young men need to learn by doing, just as young women do.

The key is patience. Good luck.

 

[Dana Gallagher]

Okay you’ve been given good advice here… I hope you use it well.

Now for my two cents (for what’s its worth)

Okay for some women (or girls since we’ve established you’re both inexperienced) a blow job is a hard thing (no pun intended) to do, I know I didn’t give a blow job until many many months into a relationship with the guy that took my virginity. And I’m certain it wasn’t that good of one, but since he was a virgin as well, I’m sure he didn’t notice.

Anyways, to all young girls the cock is going to look huge, no matter what the true size just because it’s the first (or second, or third) she’s seen. It’s the same difference when a woman of minimal breast size wears a push up bra and she unveils her breasts before an inexperienced guy. He’s not thinking that he boobs look smaller than they did inside her shirt, he’s just thinking BOOBS! A girl sees a cock and is thinking… you want to put that where?

With my first real boyfriend (virginity taker) I played with his cock, handjobs and such and very slowly worked my way up to a blowjob… the key here is patience and if she never does, she never does. IT HAS TO BE HER DECISION, NOT YOURS! Now if you are lucky enough to actually receive a blowjob from her, DO NOT get too excited, let her do all the movement. Also, the first time she gives you one, if she does, DO NOT expect her to swallow, warn her far in advance that you are about to cum. If you try to be tricky and not tell her that you are about to cum and spew in her mouth I would not blame her if she smacked you upside the head with a 2x4… actually I would be clapping and saying “you go girl”

I think Arden is right too many guys think that their first time (or first few times) is going to be like a porno movie… real life is never like the movies, this is a fact!

Sex can be really enjoyable, but for it to be that way you have to have patience and not be thinking how quickly you will get your rocks off.

Now I noticed you said that you fingered her and then expected a blowjob, first off don’t do a favor to expect another. When you where a child you didn’t do the dishes for your mother expecting her to repay the favor and clean your room. You give oral (and I mean oral not rubbing her with your finger! ORAL=TONGUE IN PUSSY) because you want to give her (not you) pleasure. If you are a real man you would receive pleasure from seeing her receive it.

Okay now about her, I didn’t receive much oral before my marriage and then actually not much after the I do’s. My ex-husband used his finger mostly, rarely using his tongue claiming that his tongue was swelling. He would rub me with his finger and I would twitch and shake, he made this out to be a really long orgasm. The truth was that he never got me to orgasm, what he did was drive me nuts. He pressed to hard and too fast in a sensitive area, what it felt like was electric shock therapy. A bunch of jolts, but no real bang! Then when he pulled back the hood saying he was really going to drive me wild I wanted to slap him upside the head with a 2x4, cause it was too insanely intense and way too much.

After my ex eavesdropped on a conversation that I had with my sister and he heard me express my views on shock therapy, he learned and taught himself how to make me climax. He was easier with the rubs (still not very giving in the oral area) and he began to explore the entire expanse that is the pussy and not just the clit. He listened to my responses and asked me what I liked and didn’t like.

Well, for his efforts he got a great return, he not only discovered that I was multiorgamsic when properly stimulated also to the surprise of both of us he found out that I could ejaculate as well. See with patience you can be rewarded!

Now since the ex and the first boyfriend I have received much more oral and I have to say that I much more prefer the tongue to the finger. The tongue is just more softer and plus it comes with its own lubricant. The clit is a lot like the head of your cock, would you enjoy it if someone gave the head of you cock a dry rub with no lube? This is the same for the clit, it needs lube too.

Anyways, I’m just wondering if you’ve ever actually licked her with your tongue, or do you consider your version of oral rubbing her with your finger? If you aren’t willing to actually give her some LONG licks you don’t even have the right to be griping about lack of blowjobs. Also, if you do decide to actually lick her pussy, be prepared for a long licking session (that is if you do it right and don’t give her shock therapy) cause it can take a woman (especially inexperienced one) and long time to climax.

Okay that’s all the thoughts I have for now!

 

[Cracker84]

Now I noticed you said that you fingered her and then expected a blowjob, first off don’t do a favor to expect another. When you where a child you didn’t do the dishes for your mother expecting her to repay the favor and clean your room. You give oral (and I mean oral not rubbing her with your finger! ORAL=TONGUE IN PUSSY) because you want to give her (not you) pleasure. If you are a real man you would receive pleasure from seeing her receive it.



Anyways, I’m just wondering if you’ve ever actually licked her with your tongue, or do you consider your version of oral rubbing her with your finger? If you aren’t willing to actually give her some LONG licks you don’t even have the right to be griping about lack of blowjobs. Also, if you do decide to actually lick her pussy, be prepared for a long licking session (that is if you do it right and don’t give her shock therapy) cause it can take a woman (especially inexperienced one) and long time to climax.

I did not finger her expexting oral, she went ahead and told me she wanted to try it. I've fingered her before and never expected anything in return and never will, thats up to her. Just that when she tried to give me oral for the first time we ran into this...



Nope, I have not yet gave her oral yet, hopefully soon. From past experiences and what advice is being given here by everyone seems its the way to go. With more access to her pussy instead of a hand down her pants its much easier to tease her and to check how she responds to everything you do down there.