orgasm virgin...this sucks

[ADIDAS0226]

i have been with a few people. one of which at one point we THINK i orgasmed but still i have doubts. and my current bf and i just got back together and i want to be able to orgasm.

what the hell is wrong?

 

[gemaussieslut]

have a browse around the site
the search function
and other parts of the how to forum
the blank manual
you should be able to find plenty of tips and tricks

dont be stressing too much about it...
everyone wants to be able to orgasm
just relax and if it happens it happens, i think if you think about it that it puts to much pressure on it and then it wont happen at all

 

[M's girl]

It's not uncommon at all that a woman has problems reaching orgasm. Let's start with that. Take a look at this site The Clitoris.com too.

I understand that you're not even sure if you ever had an orgasm. It would be nice if you could somehow determine that but it's hard to tell you what to "look" for because it feels different to everyone. I am not able to reach multiple orgasms so I know exactly when I had an orgasm. I'm almost the same as most guys: I'm done for at least 20 minutes basically. I think you can safely say that you have not reached orgasm if you still feel the urge to have some kind of stimulation (clitoral, that is) afterwards.

I understand, however, that this does not go for women who are able to have multiple orgasms, since they can have plenty in a row. I'm sure though, if that were you, you would know by now!

 

[mellowyellows]

I second her comments....this coming from a guy, with a little bit of experience!

 

[coz752]

basic tips - its not meant as a here's how guide .. cuz there aint
but there might be some good pointers - have some really good time and let us know how it turns out

- no stress
- dont force it
- relax
- enjoy
- (dont take this the wrong way) you cant give driving lessons unless you know how to drive
go and have fun and discover what gets you off so you can guide him better

(after all .. he is a male , he knows how to cum by making stroking motions .. no problem .. but .. there is a small difference . a guy has a good indication of when to start stroking on his body .. a girl can get off by stroking particular pressure points (even complete with gushing or squirting) but thats something for the next lesson )

first things first ... most men dont have a lot of intimite places that get them off - so they might tend to focus on one thing at the time .. girls usually like a bit of difference, men recognize that a women has more uhm .. hot spots ..but in the beginning you will find he will tend to focus on about 3 things

well ..
- dont let him poke at anything for a few mins and expect to cum unless you know you will from personal experience and how - or he does (but if he would , you wouldnt be asking )

(for example a lot of girls come from rhythmic stroking of the g spot .. or the clitoris - but thats not the best thing to start with - it is the best thing to end with )

-- so the best thing is to explore yourself first
-- touch yourself all over, try if there are some spots that make you feel good, besides obviously the vagina and breasts plus nipples
--- explore those too .. make sure what you do and dont like

--soft massages make excellent foreplay , and if you know your magic buttons - its bound to help
-- mind again not to force anything .. girls can get aroused by a good footmassage for example but ive never seen a girl cum on it - if your turned on, _guide_ him forward , its pointless if hes wasting time )

-- besides the erotic stimulating points that are special for everyone personally .. common ones are earlobes, back of the head, neck, armpits, thighs, back of the knee, elbow .. etc .. well there are the obvious erotic points like the breasts, nipples, butt , the whole vagina inside and out and the clitoris

-- his best bet is to make sure everything gets a bit attention until you feel the need to point him somewhere specific - (off course do not literally point or tell what he should do - be constructive, subtle but not too subtle)

- communicate - but dont overdo it (dont go, a inch left.. no .. almost .. almost .. ) but do _guide_ him what you want when you want it (it can be as subtle as moving his hand down a bit during the massage) - or rolling over when hes massaging your bare back to _guide_ him to put it up a notch

-alway stay positive and constructive
most men need only a soft hmmmm to know they are doing _something_ that makes you feel good .. so dont be afraid to hmmmm once in a while
(its a major turn on anyway) ... if hes totally wrong dont say things like 'thats not working like that' .. keep it positive .. dont explain or talk too much but for example 'hmm thats nice, but can we try it like this' then _guide_ his hands .. dont start with 'just a little bit to the left' - thats a turnoff

(i keep mentioning that you should be subtle, for the sake of the experience .. but you shouldn't be TOO subtle. do not be vague, its hard to explain .. k .. here is the deal - a guy with a hard on has a lot of blood in his dick - meaning there is less blood in the brain to think _yes old joke but has a good point_ - men dont understand women normally , imagine what happens when they cant think at all because all the blood is gone.. so try to be clear. im saying you can try and be subtle - but if he doesnt understand .. break that rule and just say (maybe whisper in the ear) things like 'i want you to suck on my clit now' _ thats no problem to a guy .. do not say it feels good when it doesnt feel good - but it can be as easy as only making hmmm sounds when it feels good - he will understand and remember thats a good spot. .. - subtle works but if he doesnt understand - break the subtleness a bit or at all - if hes really not understood just say it clear... but stay positive !)

hope it helps a bit