~Post baseless lies about the person above you - V.6~

[dreams_in_words]

He is the infamous M&M minis tube guy.

https://www.reddit.com/r/hypotheticalsituation/comments/zs3w8p/hypothetically_you_have_a_cylinder_51_inches_in

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Who do you think mashed the banana for him? Yahoozie!

 

[Sundayschild]

Originally from Mildenhall

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Thinks strippers’ pasties are tastier than Cornish pasties

 

[GraiceeGirl]

Likes to sleep in Jodhpurs.

 

[Sundayschild]

Likes to sleep in Jodhpurs.

Her AV is actually a close up of the sill of her car

 

[UsuallyPresent]

He calls his car ‘Collider’. . . For multiple reasons

 

[tommyt125]

His earlobes are shaped like the state of New Jersey

 

[UsuallyPresent]

He exemplifies Ohio - a greeting stuck between two holes

 

[EctoJohn]

Refuses to drive anywhere without a Labubu on the dash.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Refuses to drive anywhere without a Labubu on the dash.

That’s not Labubu, it’s Little Bunny FooFoo!

He bops all the fieldmice on the head

 

[EMPTYSTAR]

He learned math just so he could calculate how many chicken nuggets he can get for $5

 

[UsuallyPresent]

He always relies on the kindness of strangers

 

[Justabaldguy70]

He always relies on the kindness of strangers

He is not always present

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Of course not! I'm only present where I'm present - the remaining sightings are purely phantoms, phantasies, and/or psychological flaws!

That's not an earring - that's the grabbable end of a pullstarter.

 

[Spurtulator]

Of course not! I'm only present where I'm present - the remaining sightings are purely phantoms, phantasies, and/or psychological flaws!

That's not an earring - that's the grabbable end of a pullstarter.

Refers to his penis as “The Pullstarter”

 

[EMPTYSTAR]

His spirit guide is a drunk pigeon

 

[Sexydrana]

@EMPTYSTAR is a spirit guide but he’ll only trick you into doing weird shit. But you didn’t hear this from me

 

[Ratchetman1982]

@EMPTYSTAR is a spirit guide but he’ll only trick you into doing weird shit. But you didn’t hear this from me View attachment 2564970

Has access to the "Super Secret Menu" at Starbucks that includes quadruple shots of tequila, the years of her enemies, and cool ranch Doritos

 

[EMPTYSTAR]

Has access to the "Super Secret Menu" at Starbucks that includes quadruple shots of tequila, the years of her enemies, and cool ranch Doritos

He’s a fitness guru, his daily workout consists of walking from the bed to the fridge. Twice, if it’s leg day

 

[Ratchetman1982]

He’s a fitness guru, his daily workout consists of walking from the bed to the fridge. Twice, if it’s leg day

Cybersexed every woman on Lit in a three day period, but used a new app to erase their memories of it

 

[EMPTYSTAR]

Cybersexed every woman on Lit in a three day period, but used a new app to erase their memories of it

I didn't have enough time for all of them, they were relentless

He puts “fluent in Excel” on his resume, but it’s just because he knows how to color the boxes~

 

[UsuallyPresent]

I didn't have enough time for all of them, they were relentless

He puts “fluent in Excel” on his resume, but it’s just because he knows how to color the boxes~

He didn't, because he can't.

 

[PotNoodle79]

Reinvented time travel.
Twice.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Is a major consumer of No-Starch Press