Question about describing your characters

[jaysonfrommars_del]

I know I’m just singing along with the chorus at this point but I completely agree with you about development. I think unless there’s a very good reason why details of a person or situation should be given out before the narrator or reader would naturally know them, then those details should be revealed as they would to the narrator. I think just dumping out all the details at the beginning makes the story less intriguing because you kind of already know what’s going on.

To me a good analogy would be the first time that you have sex with a new partner everything is new. You get to learn about their body, their scent, their level of enthusiasm and skill, and 1 million other things. But it’s the discovery and slowly reveal of those things that makes it so exciting. I believe a good erotic story should unfold in much the same manner, allowing the reader to be shocked, surprised, disappointed, or anything else at a real person in a sexual scenario might be

 

[ElectricBlue]

That's more description than I've given to all the human bodies in that story put together. What people are born with generally doesn't interest me very much, but the parts of appearance that they choose are much more relevant to character. Anjali (the dressmaker and wearer) is clever and obsessive, and in this section she's gone out of her way to pick an aesthetic that her "friend" will appreciate.

Similarly, the way somebody cuts or dyes their hair might say a lot more than the colour they were born with.

That dress description, Bramble, was fabulous.

I love a good description of clothing, and in one of my stories conjured up a couturier purely as a self-indulgence, to describe a long dressing scene with lingerie and hand picked clothes. Dressing, of course, precedes undressing .

 

[KeithD]

That's a really serious and condescending reply to an extension of a joke I made fun of the stereotypical man who knows eight different colours [red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, black, white) and nothing about their partner.

At no point did I say or imply that you (or anyone) could not do whatever you want with your stories or that someone's mean to get turned is better than somebody else's. Previous post from me in other threads actually state the exact opposite.

You actually come across very elitist yourself with your statement. You seem to look down your nose at those who disagree with you at least as much as those that you accuse.

Well, there you all go again.

There, by the way, is more than one issue being discussed on this thread. Anyone with any knowledge of my posts know that I council to bring in description when and as needed, leaving out ones that aren't going to serve the plot. So my posting hasn't been to that issue. It's been to the visualization of measurements as factors of arousal.

I think you are misjudging what I've gone after in what you posted--and are taking this to a higher, unnecessary level of personal vitriol.

 

[gordo12]

Curious as to what your tastes are, I find myself skimming over descriptor passages and moving on to sections that tell the story.

I agree with Keith; I don't think it is poor writing when you give your readers what they want. It's poor thinking, to ignore the fact that lots of people are devouring it. Doesn't mean that YOU have to write it, but stop telling readers or writers about styles being rich or poor.

Somehow there are some people who managed to get obscenely rich by what is 'generally' considered to be 'poor' writing.

Thank you Ruben. Perhaps you missed the OP's original question. Curious as to what your tastes are

My TASTES are as I described. I happen to agree with him. And my reasons for delineated. I don't need to stop telling people about styles being rich or poor because that isn't the question. I'm posting my own personal opinion.

Why don't you answer the OP's question without an accusatory tone and pointing fingers at others.

 

[gordo12]

Well, there you all go again.

There, by the way, is more than one issue being discussed on this thread. Anyone with any knowledge of my posts know that I council to bring in description when and as needed, leaving out ones that aren't going to serve the plot. So my posting hasn't been to that issue. It's been to the visualization of measurements as factors of arousal.

I think you are misjudging what I've gone after in what you posted--and are taking this to a higher, unnecessary level of personal vitriol.

I'm not sure we're all not chasing a red herring here. The OP specifically outlines LW stories. I can tell you from experience the visual description he's talking about is one or two paragraphs occurring at the beginning of the story that describes the (generally) wife in glowing, you wouldn't believe it, terms. Then goes on for one or two paragraphs about himself.

Visual yes, But I'm saying (and the OP) that all that info can be dropped into the story as it moves along. It does not need to be up front and in a one or two paragraph format as is so often done in LW. ( To the OP. Correct me if I'm wrong on this post please)

 

[KeithD]

The OP really covers two issues--when, where, whether to put in character description at all (which makes for a good discussion) and the issue of expressing it in measurements.

If you bring up the issues of imaging in measurements (while missing that it usually isn't a literal use of the measurements) as an "I don't read this/don't do it" or of agreeing with this in a discussion, you are, in fact, telling others what they should respond to in arousal terms, what they should write, and what they should read. There's no other reason to bring it up or to pile on about it on the discussion board.

And I don't have the foggiest notion why anyone would claim I was being elitist in taking this position. Quite the opposite, I think. I'm being leave others the hell alone to enjoy their arousal and their own turnons.

 

[SimonDoom]

I'm not sure we're all not chasing a red herring here. The OP specifically outlines LW stories. I can tell you from experience the visual description he's talking about is one or two paragraphs occurring at the beginning of the story that describes the (generally) wife in glowing, you wouldn't believe it, terms. Then goes on for one or two paragraphs about himself.

Visual yes, But I'm saying (and the OP) that all that info can be dropped into the story as it moves along. It does not need to be up front and in a one or two paragraph format as is so often done in LW. ( To the OP. Correct me if I'm wrong on this post please)

Bingo. You got this right. It shouldn't be too difficult for us to keep these threads from going off the rails. We just have to stay focused.

 

[management91399]

Thank you so much

For all the replies I really appreciate it, even the arguing, this is the internet after all and what would it be without a little of that! No I really mean it when I say thank you, I thought I was posting a stupid question staring up into the mountain populated by erotic fiction Hemingways and wondering if I should trust my gut which is the striptease approach. A little is revealed at a time, the tease enhances the stimulation. The scene I've finished is basically a stroke scene and my concern was I've found myself skipping over potential stroke scenes in other authors stories because I was interested in what was going to happen in the plot.

In my particular opus this scene happens in the middle of the story (I've already written it, I want to go back and write the scenes that lead up to this and then write the scene after, a sine wave pattern) I think it's hot and as I go back to the beginning how much do I want to reveal about the characters bodies prior to this big bang.

This is the place where the actual nudity happens but there is potential nudity prior and I felt it made it hotter in my eyes that we're getting the naughty details here in the throes of passion. At some point I'll probably wonder how many times a twenty something male can ejaculate within a 2 hour period of time! ;-) but thats for a later day or maybe an editor.

No I just wondered if anyone thinks about this stuff, I am totally in the slow reveal camp but I don't care what other writers do, I either read you or I don't, if I read you I comment, if I don't comment then I didn't read you.

But mostly thanks, I really appreciate all the comments and I'm glad there is a place to ask questions and get such thoughtful and passionate replies.

M

 

[Handley_Page]

Originally Posted by cathoberscaravan

"Blonde hair, blue eyes, five-foot-five, one-ten, 34- 28- 36, 34Ds..." I said.

"And what was your wife wearing?" The first cop who responded asked me.

"I don't know... Maybe yoga pants and an oversized knit top..."

"What color," asked the second.

"Black... No wait maroon... Maybe purple... I think... Look why are you asking me these questions, we need to find them."

"Yes, and the car, Sir," said the second cop.

"It's a fire engine red 2018 Ford Mustang GT convertible with a Charcoal Grey and Black two tone Spanish Leather interior, the console upgrade, Performance Package, a 460-horsepower, 5.0-liter V-8, a six-speed manual transmission, not the 10-speed automatic. Michelin Pilot Sport 4S summer tires mounted on 19-inch wheels, Brembo brakes and the MagneRide suspension and a Bose 6800-12 triple quadrophonic sound system--"

Further to Rusty's comments about colour, the car would not be fitted with a 'domestic' (ie., home) sound gadget like a BOSE 6800-12, which was only available 1994-1999.

(Fine; I'll just sit here in the corner and wait for my Nurse. . . .)

 

[yukonnights]

I've gotten a lot of comments about people enjoy the fact that I don't give outright descriptions of characters. Because the reader gets to imagine it however they want.

Sometimes I'll put hair color descriptions if I think it's relevent, or skin color. For instance, I love tan lines, so naturally there'll be a description on that. Maybe a woman has red hair and it makes her stand out, and that becomes a topic of conversation. Maybe she's a tall woman, giving her a more domineering presence. Etc...

One thing I always describe as breasts. When I read erotica, I want to know what her breasts/nipples look like.

Aside from that, I find that personality through dialogue and a note of their occupation and how they're dressed gives the reader enough material to imagine it, rather than a big info dump.

I tend to aim for this approach — drop small clues/mentions in the story where appropriate. I've noticed that I use shower scenes a lot, they offer a great opportunity to mention a detail here and there. I also much prefer to read this. Hard physical sizes/measurements don't do much for my imagination as I read. Her small pert breasts or, her 32-A's

I hear what KiethD is saying, and it is a valid point. But I can't do it both ways so I choose the more subtle approach … and I guess, the readers who like that.

 

[NotWise]

For all the replies I really appreciate it, even the arguing, this is the internet after all and what would it be without a little of that! No I really mean it when I say thank you, I thought I was posting a stupid question staring up into the mountain populated by erotic fiction Hemingways and wondering if I should trust my gut which is the striptease approach. A little is revealed at a time, the tease enhances the stimulation. The scene I've finished is basically a stroke scene and my concern was I've found myself skipping over potential stroke scenes in other authors stories because I was interested in what was going to happen in the plot.

I've done that, but I should do less of it.

I'm afraid that the arguments are partially my fault, because I conflated two ideas in my initial response. One was the idea of distributing description to where it's needed. The other was the idea that some readers actually need the explicit measurements that often appear in those paragraphs of description.

I generally like distributing the description (or skipping it), so I think you're on the right track. Distributing the description doesn't mean that you can't use dick length or bra size if you want to. Those can be distributed as well.

 

[JaxRhapsody]

I usually throw bits and pieces lf description throughout the story as scenes allow.

 

[BelleCanzuto]

"Mi nombre es Maria," she said, and her eyes flitted down his muscular torso -- barely disguised under his tailored dress shirt. "You must be Dick."

NotWise FTW.
I'm kinda feel like I should write a story that starts that way and dedicate it to you.
Or maybe a version that's from Maria's POV...

 

[NotWise]

NotWise FTW.
I'm kinda feel like I should write a story that starts that way and dedicate it to you.
Or maybe a version that's from Maria's POV...

Oh! Totally do it from Maria's POV, and then dedicate it to me. I'll read.

 

[BelleCanzuto]

Oh! Totally do it from Maria's POV, and then dedicate it to me. I'll read.

Challenge accepted! Deadline permeable!

 

[NotWise]

Challenge accepted! Deadline permeable!

These days, permeable deadlines are the only deadlines I recognize.

 

[Hypoxia]

I usually throw bits and pieces lf description throughout the story as scenes allow.

About the same here. Sometimes the story dynamic calls for some sort of up-front description, often not, and with fresh details delivered as needed or for fun. It might be awhile before readers realize her head is shaved.

The palette may include overall dimensions, with numbers if appropriate, but approximation works too ("she almost matched his six-foot height but her tits were admirably bigger"); tastes and smells; colors and textures of skin, hair, eyes, scars; ethnic stereotypes as shorthand, like Saxon or Levantine or Tonkinese or Aztec; character of voice and gestures; distinctive garb; etc.

If I start off with body statistics, the piece is probably parody.

 

[TheStoryTeller2342]

No quicker way to get me to hit the Back button than to front-load a story with the characters measurements, particularly if they're ridiculous or fantasy measurements.

Obviously you have to describe characters at some point, but that should be organic, not a bullet point list.

 

[SimonDoom]

No quicker way to get me to hit the Back button than to front-load a story with the characters measurements, particularly if they're ridiculous or fantasy measurements.

Obviously you have to describe characters at some point, but that should be organic, not a bullet point list.

The worst is when eager-beaver male narrator/writers tell me about their 10+ inch monster cocks before I know anything else about them. Next.

 

[Maeven_quinn]

I tend to aim for this approach — drop small clues/mentions in the story where appropriate. I've noticed that I use shower scenes a lot, they offer a great opportunity to mention a detail here and there. I also much prefer to read this. Hard physical sizes/measurements don't do much for my imagination as I read. Her small pert breasts or, her 32-A's

I hear what KiethD is saying, and it is a valid point. But I can't do it both ways so I choose the more subtle approach … and I guess, the readers who like that.

Yup. That's how I do it.

I provide eye and hair color, shape of the face, general height, and build for many of my characters in my head and notes.

Most of that doesn't make it into the stories, especially since I write first person. The narrator is going notice physical characteristics of a character, but she would never say "the 170 lb guy with an athletic build, ruddy brown hair, an tattoo on his left thigh who secretly wears contact lenses wouldn't stop hitting on me."

 

[gordo12]

but she would never say "the 170 lb guy with an athletic build, ruddy brown hair, an tattoo on his left thigh who secretly wears contact lenses wouldn't stop hitting on me."

Except to the police

 

[KeithD]

And so, we're right back to where this always goes. Needing to tell other writers what you personally wouldn't read--so they shouldn't (which is the only reason to need to hear your personal preferences--your belief that everyone should either write just for you or not write at all).

 

[Maeven_quinn]

Except to the police

Lol yeah... there’s a new story idea!

 

[ChloeTzang]

The worst is when eager-beaver male narrator/writers tell me about their 10+ inch monster cocks before I know anything else about them. Next.

Well, it’s the first thing as girl looks for. Rotflmao

 

[KeithD]

Well, it’s the first thing as girl looks for. Rotflmao

It also is quite real in gay male literature, including measurement. And a large section of gay male readers would know exactly what that measurement looks like and why it was being included in the story.