Question for the bbws and I guess guys take on it too.

[LookngForFun]

I have to lose about 80-90 pounds to be my goal weight. I know the same rules don't seem to apply to guys, but trust me, they do.

The difference is, fat guys don't get girls as easily as fat girls get guys. My advice? Be honest, talk about it. I'm 32, you don't have to listen to me. I have found that people tend to feel better about situations when there is no gray area.

You say you "have a chance" with two guys. You may think they are the only two, but I promise you there are a number out there who don't have the balls to approach.

Thanks. And I know it's true about fat men having less of a chance getting any compared to fat women..unless it's with other fat women. I had a 250lb friend in highschool who was a virgin until early-mid 20's. She went to college and met a guy as tall and fat as her and they got married. I am also still working on losing some weight so I know that feeling too about just wanting to wait until you're there to actually bother with trying. I could feel more comfortable with a guy who makes it known he likes me for me and any imperfections wouldn't matter..but even getting to that point of having that conversation is hard. You'd have to let someone in enough to risk that kind of rejection.

 

[masterdrakin]

It's exactly what I said. The breast issue. I could get my weight down to 110lbs but it's not going to help the hanging/sag issue. Sure, it's easy on a forum like this where everything is out in the open and a guy would know ahead of time. It's getting to know someone and the fear of them being disgusted/disappointed after the first time.

Interesting bra.

Anyway, thanks for the replies. Appreciate the different perspectives on it.

Ok since your not wanting to share a pic to give everyone a visual on what the issue is. I get that it's not your weight that's the problem. If im understanding this correctly its the size if your chest and your 20's and they sag. So you think something is wrong because of that. One dear is if your talking D's and up there gonna show signs of sagging the bigger they are the more it will look to sag to stop that get a nice fitting bra (god I can't believe I just said that. I hate bras ). Now I may have missed it but what chest size are we talking about here.

 

[Francesca26]

My assets are not exactly perky. Would like surgery for that but from what I read it's best to have kids first if I plan on doing that. Anyway, my question is..is this something guys expect with bbws even though not all have that problem? Or do you aware them of it first so it's not surprise and disgust when you finally have sex? I'd be more confident with certain people if I didn't feel like I had such an embarrassment to hide. I'm still in my 20's so it's not like it's expected because of my age either. I did lose a lot of weight but people don't know that off the bat either.

I'm not going to lie and say I never thought certain guys looked better with their shirts on. I know I have no right to be picky but I'm not going to pretend certain things don't turn me off.

Ahh, the downside of large breasts, I know it well. I don't think it's unusual for women with very large breasts to experience sagging when we're still young, especially if you've lost weight recently- just a product of gravity. I understand your insecurity though - I think we are so inundated with images of cosmetically altered breasts that we don't recognize what normal looks like.

A few thoughts:

-If these guys that you're talking about seem attracted to you with your bra on, my guess is that they're not going to care that much if your breasts aren't porn-star perfect with your bra off. I think what's more important is that you come to appreciate your breasts the way they are. If you're clearly confident and comfortable in your own body, I think they're a lot more likely to like the way you look too.

-As someone in the same situation, I am betting that you're more prone to focus on the way your breasts look than others because you know what your body used to look like, and you can't help but compare. But these guys (I'm guessing) don't know what your breasts used to look like - to them, you probably look perfectly natural.

-Try scrolling through this gallery. http://www.007b.com/breast_gallery.php We don't usually have occasion to compare our breasts with other women's. It's strange, but men (whose experience is with real women, not porn) might really have a better appreciation for the diversity of women's breasts than we do. You might realize you fit right in!

-If you really don't like the way they look as you're losing weight, sometimes exercises that target your chest muscles can help. (They won't stop the sagging, but stronger chest muscles can improve the overall look of your breasts.)

I hope you can work up the confidence to take a chance with one of these guys. Chancing rejection is terrifying, but usually worth it!

 

[LucyH]

There are 2 currently that seem to like me but I avoid both of them and keep them at a distance because I've seen the girls they've had sex with before and I don't look like them.

The people I've had sex with don't look anything like each other, for what it's worth.