Self Spanking Gurus - Some Questions

[BarefootNikki]

Well, the time has arrived. For the first time in many years, my spanking life now matches my sex life, in that I find that I just have to get my toys out and do it myself.

So, after a few initial attempts that have gone not great, I have questions for anyone who does this, or helps others to.

One - I mean, it's an obvious one, but how do you not pull back on severity? I'm no wimp but I'm not even getting close.

Two - For me it's all about ritual as much as the whacking. Lines, soaping, essays, how to create that setting yourself?

Three - Consistency. Yeah, I'm just not gonna wallop myself with that today. Too easy. How to avoid avoidance?

Four - Cane. How and how?


So, yeah. Any help appreciated.

 

[snow_orchid]

I have tried, but I find without a partner it isn't quite the same...

It's hard to control impact, self preservation being what it is. I find that you need to be worked up first, whereas with a partner the impact will be early on.

I create the scenario in my head, draw on past experience largely helps

See earlier comment, get worked up first and then you will be less likely too, in my experience.

Have fun!

Snow x

 

[Scooter58]

Thank you for starting this thread. I have some of the same questions and would be interested in hearing other’s perspectives.

 

[RogerThat208]

Great topic. I appreciate both the conundrum and your sincerity in trying to sort it out.

I think it starts with considering why you're doing it, and then defining some structure and accountability around that.

Consider why you need it, and why you're doing it. What's your motivation for willingly punishing yourself?

Begin with the end in mind. What are the specific objectives of your punishment? E.g. To administer 50 half-hearted strokes with your bare hand, or receive a dozen severe swats with a wooden bath brush. Or maybe something like "spank myself with my paddle until I start crying real tears, and then give myself 10 more good swats."

To whom are you accountable for successfully administering your punishment on time, and to the degree expected? To yourself? To someone else? Be quite specific about this, even if you choose to only be accountable to yourself.

If you fail to meet expectations and/or objectives for the punishment, whether set by yourself or someone else, you should expect in advance to receive appropriately meaningful and motivational consequences in return.

Pick some experiences or things, positive or negative, that actually mean something to you. Things that you desire or detest so much that you'd rather successfully administer and endure the punishment rather than give them up (the good things) or perform them (the unpleasant things.)

For example, "If I skip my scheduled discipline or fail to administer it properly, then I must give up coffee (or alcohol or weed or whatever) for the next week before permitting myself to try again." Stuff like that.

It's unclear how sexual arousal and release plays into your specific kink, because you haven't said. But in general I'd suggest using sexual arousal, release, or denial as motivators to help keep you focused and enthusiastically motivated. Your Dom/Domme, if you had one, wouldn't reward your laziness and/or poor performance with generous sexual favors or privileges, so it seems silly for you to cheat and award them to yourself either.

You mentioned the discipline of writing lines and essays etc. in your post. Everything I wrote above is a great opportunity for you to exercise your submissive mental muscle to that end. I.e. write it down, do it, review the results, and then enjoy the rewards or suffer the consequences. Rinse, lather, and repeat as necessary.

In the end though, if you're not capable of holding yourself accountable to your own detailed and documented objectives, then this is probably a futile exercise for solo play.

Just my three cents... (because inflation, lol.)

 

[Scooter58]

I bought a leather flogger with longer tails in the hopes that I could flick it backwards over my shoulders and it would at least reach my lower back. I found out that I needed one that was even longer AND that the width of the tails on the one I bought were too wide and didn’t land with enough “sting”.
The search continues…

 

[Mustang61]

I had lover who loved to be spank, no paddle, but my boots with treads.... NUDE over my lap, then he'd nurse and also wanted to be peed on. Younger than me... It was an experience

 

[PleasureDaddy]

I find some items work better than others. And it can be extra sensual if being told what to do. The obedience adds to the experience. Wooden spoons, rulers, a looped belt, rubber spatula for pussy spanking, and dowel rods for thighs if feeling like enjoying a sharp mark..

 

[Phkrep85]

That sounds fun!

 

[Phkrep85]

Love why you NEED it

 

[Felicity_Fellatio_CD]

Items I've used on myself to good effect, a steel ruler, folded leather belt, a riding crop and a short wooden cane. Out of those, my fav is probably the riding crop, which has a nice piece of folded leather which forms a loop connected to the tip of the crop with a metal clip.

If I'm on my hands and knees, knickers pulled down around my lower thighs and short skirt hitched up over my peachy ass, I can give myself a good whacking over my rear or tops of my thighs with it.

I became good at self CP out of necessity really, as an apprentice way back in the 1980s, I worked for quite an old fashioned company headed by a very strict elderly Managing Director, you only got to see him when you were in trouble, his office was like an inner sanctum, with a gate keeping PA secretary overseeing who went in or out.

I was just 18 an apprentice, very niave, the call came from his PA , I had to drop everything and attend his office immediately, she seemed stern and authoritarian.

My work mates teased me and said I'd done something bad, then one started rubbing him ass and pretending to wince, like he'd been spanked, I'd heard rumours CP was used in certain disciplinary situations by the MD but thought it was just a myth to scare new recruits.

I rushed upstairs sat in his PAs office, she came through, 'he's just seeing to Sophie, you're next, take a seat'...

I sat for what seemed like half an hour, my heart pounding, anxious, nervous, worried what it was about. She gave me a couple of forms to fill out and sign, I hadn't read through them, just completed my details and signed them.

He came through on the old fashioned intercom, 'Send him through', he bellowed.

She opened the oak door into the boardroom, a long substantial oak table with green leather inlay, very ornate with heavy matching chairs, the room itself had that old fashioned wood panelling. 'Take a seat, he'll call you in..take these consent forms'

I stared around the room at the old pictures of past board members, I could hear muffled talking, it was Sophie, a new young lady in the clerical office, there was raised voices from him, then soft pleading from Sophie, then a loud, firm WHACK! Then a shriek, followed by another and another.

The door burst open, he took the forms, 'good you consent then?', I nodded, not sure what exactly I had signed.

'Look, I'll be upfront you're short on your production figures by 10 units this month, we have a zero tolerance policy on shortfalls and a specific way we deal with that, it's very effective and ensures it doesn't happen again! Understand?', he stated boldly.
I nodded again, he placed 3 items on the table, a steel ruler, a thin wooden cane and a rubber soled plimsol, 'you know what these are for?', I nodded, anyone who lived through the 1970s early 1980s knows exactly what they're for.

'Pick one...', he demanded, 'I haven't got all day!', he barked.

I pointed to the steel ruler, 'would you like a chance at reducing your punishment?' He asked inquisitively.

'Yes...', I nodded

'YES WHAT?', he bellowed.

'Yes Sir', I answered dutifully.

'Right go through there and give Sophie a good whack with that ruler'

I was hesitant but knew any resistance would only be met by more punishment, this was my chance to reduce mine.

Sophie was bent over his desk, her knickers pulled down, skirt pulled up, revealing her bare bum cheeks, already glowing red. She was clinging to the desk, trembling, 'what do you want Sophie?', he asked her...

'A good whack SIR!', she eagerly replied.

'Go on lad..', he encouraged me, I took a swing and gave it my best across her bare cheek, she winced loudly, sobbing.

'Again!', he barked, WHACK! 'Another!', WHACK, 'One more..', WHACK....

'Is that enough for you Sophie?', he asked calmly, she nodded, 'want anymore?', she shook her head vigorously..

'Well let's see no more mistakes in your work then!', he ordered sternly, 'Now get out of my office!'

She left quickly pulling up her knickers and adjusting her skirt....

I went to leave following her....'Not you..', he ordered.

On the desk, assume the position, pull your pants down!', I complied.

'Now whack yourself! If you don't do it right, I'll do it for you!'

I took the steel ruler and swung as best I could across my own ass, WHACK, 'Harder, that won't do....', he yelled, again I took another swing, WHACK....

'Not like that, like this!', he took an almighty swing across my ass with the steel ruler, I felt the welt form as the sting hit home, then the warm after glow, slightly pleasurable, again another WHACK, 'like this you soft arse!', he bellowed and gave me the ruler.

I gave myself another WHACK, 'better, another!', WHACK! 'Another...', WHACK! 'One more...', WHACK! That one made me yelp.....my ass was stinging and the burning sensation was intense....I looked around and noticed the front of his trousers was tenting...

'No go, don't let those figures fall into a shortfall again!'

I quickly pulled up my pants and left as quickly as I could vowing to never let my figures drop again...

I met Sophie in the canteen later that afternoon, we gave each other a knowing and understanding look, I apologised for what I did to her but she told me it wasn't my fault and she would have done the same and in fact it wasn't as bad as he had been whacking her, she added 'it was actually quite nice to be honest...SIR', she smiled at me seductively, had I just pulled?

After bumping into her, it wasn't just my ass that was glowing, I came away feeling quite privileged at having given Sophie a good spanking that she had enjoyed...

 

[Felicity_Fellatio_CD]

After that corporal punishment in the MDs office, that we had both administered to ourselves, Sophie and I shared a special bond.

She was fresh out of secretarial college, fun, and very bubbly, with a very naughty playful side.

I worked in the manufacturing shed and only got to see her if I visited the offices, thankfully I did so regularly.

It was in the photocopying room I next bumped into her, had to copy some production figures. moved behind her in the tight space as she copied some papers.
Wiggling her ass playfully into my groin, 'do you want to spank me?', she asked seductively, lifting her skirt and showing off her firm bum cheek, smooth milky thighs and stocking tops. I grabbed a handful of fleshy buttock and squeezed, giving her a firm spank, she winced as that sharp sensation made her ass cheek glow.

'I'd rather watch you spank yourself', I added cheekily, with that she bent forward over the copier and spanked her own ass, making her fleshy thighs quiver and tremble.

Grinding into her rear, my erection growing in my pants, just wanting to slip her knickers to one side and bury my length deep in her tight cunt but too risky as there were a few staff still working late, despite home time being 20 mins ago!

Instead I slipped my hands up inside her top and reached under her bra cups squeezing those full, heavy mammeries with the bumpy textured, huge dark saucer shaped areola, surrounding her large meaty nipples, which I expertly teased.
She wriggled playfully beneath me, almost pinning her down to the photocopier window, I lifted up her top and yanked down her bra, pressing her gorgeous globes against the glass and pressed copy.

The bright light and copy head moved across the photocopier window.

She's giggling, trying to pull free as the first B&W image of those gorgeous unveiled breasts, lands in the out tray.

She struggled free pulled her top down adjusted her bra and took the copy, scrunching it up, embarrassed, quickly left. Thankfully I had pressed 2 copies, another copy slipped into the out tray.

The next morning I put a copy on the notice board.....and passed around a copy to the lads I worked with, they're very envious I've had a good grope...

 

[RogerThat208]

After that corporal punishment in the MDs office, that we had both administered to ourselves, Sophie and I shared a special bond.

She was fresh out of secretarial college, fun, and very bubbly, with a very naughty playful side.

I worked in the manufacturing shed and only got to see her if I visited the offices, thankfully I did so regularly.

It was in the photocopying room I next bumped into her, had to copy some production figures. moved behind her in the tight space as she copied some papers.
Wiggling her ass playfully into my groin, 'do you want to spank me?', she asked seductively, lifting her skirt and showing off her firm bum cheek, smooth milky thighs and stocking tops. I grabbed a handful of fleshy buttock and squeezed, giving her a firm spank, she winced as that sharp sensation made her ass cheek glow.

'I'd rather watch you spank yourself', I added cheekily, with that she bent forward over the copier and spanked her own ass, making her fleshy thighs quiver and tremble.

Grinding into her rear, my erection growing in my pants, just wanting to slip her knickers to one side and bury my length deep in her tight cunt but too risky as there were a few staff still working late, despite home time being 20 mins ago!

Instead I slipped my hands up inside her top and reached under her bra cups squeezing those full, heavy mammeries with the bumpy textured, huge dark saucer shaped areola, surrounding her large meaty nipples, which I expertly teased.
She wriggled playfully beneath me, almost pinning her down to the photocopier window, I lifted up her top and yanked down her bra, pressing her gorgeous globes against the glass and pressed copy.

The bright light and copy head moved across the photocopier window.

She's giggling, trying to pull free as the first B&W image of those gorgeous unveiled breasts, lands in the out tray.

She struggled free pulled her top down adjusted her bra and took the copy, scrunching it up, embarrassed, quickly left. Thankfully I had pressed 2 copies, another copy slipped into the out tray.

The next morning I put a copy on the notice board.....and passed around a copy to the lads I worked with, they're very envious I've had a good grope...

WTF dude? Please take your thirsty male purple prose fantasy writings somewhere else.

They have absolutely nothing to do with the thread topic or the OP's genuine and thoughtfully asked questions.

 

[BarefootNikki]

Appreciate the input everyone.

I guess personally, 90% of what I would describe as punishment spankings are for some variation on laziness, so I really struggle with completing tasks I set myself. I'll do the spankings, sure, but not the essays or lines of whatever when I'm out of the sub head space.