sex in public.

[hottwife]

hey I posted one question why not another. I have benn trying to get my wife into having sex in various public places and she is all for it untill it comes time to do it. I have been trying to get her to have sex in a paking lot in the car,also sex in a parking garage in the car and also sex in a park on a park bench. I will tell her hey after we are done at the club how bout we do the nasty in the parking lot tonight. she them tells me ok we can do that tonight, then when we get to the car after we are done at the dance club she is like oh sombody could see us,or I changed my mind. so give me some pointers on how I can get her to go through with this instead of chicking out.

 

[Lithius]

Hm.. Add a reward into it. Tell her sweet things, and give her something she wants in return as well.

 

[Mary Hall]

If she doesn`t want to, she won`t, can`t force her to do something she doesn`t want

 

[hottwife]

Hm.. Add a reward into it. Tell her sweet things, and give her something she wants in return as well.

I do tell her sweet things all the time . I.E. like how much I love her,what a great body she has {and she does have a great body}, how hot she looks tonigh. you know the normal stuff.
what kind of reward could I give her.??

 

[Lithius]

If she doesn`t want to, she won`t, can`t force her to do something she doesn`t want

And that is very true. You might want to check up on that.

 

[Lithius]

what kind of reward could I give her.??

Anything you're sure of she'd like.

 

[peachykeen]

Hm.. Add a reward into it. Tell her sweet things, and give her something she wants in return as well.

I disagree; I think this is just manipulative and while she may go through with it she will feel resentful towards you and ashamed of herself for selling herself out later.

If she doesn't want to do it, so be it. Respect her feelings rather than trying to coerce her into something she doesn't want. You are aware that you are essentially asking her to commit a crime and risk public embarassment in her community, right?

 

[Mary Hall]

I will tell her hey after we are done at the club how bout we do the nasty in the parking lot tonight

Wow....how romantic

 

[Ylvie]

Well... If she's up for it in the first place, maybe she's not feeling all that forced - what do we know? You know best yourself whether this is something she might actually want to go through with. If it is, why not take it slowly, use your time... Kiss her and start making out, try to move naturally onwards. Or just start out doing something minor, how about masturbating in the car? Blowjob? Easier to cover up quickly if someone should pass... Or practise doing it on places people very rarely go, so that in the beginning she'll feel more protected from outside world. You've got to start somewhere, you know, and the bench in the park might not be the best place to begin with? Oh, and btw... Drive her somewhere a bit far away the first times you'll do it in a more public place, that way she'll feel more sure that if someone sees, it's not someone she knows.

 

[MrBates]

Why Not . . .

Walk her thru the parking lot and point out all the other couples in their cars doing the nasty?

 

[coppertop429]

Well... If she's up for it in the first place, maybe she's not feeling all that forced - what do we know? You know best yourself whether this is something she might actually want to go through with. If it is, why not take it slowly, use your time... Kiss her and start making out, try to move naturally onwards. Or just start out doing something minor, how about masturbating in the car? Blowjob? Easier to cover up quickly if someone should pass... Or practise doing it on places people very rarely go, so that in the beginning she'll feel more protected from outside world. You've got to start somewhere, you know, and the bench in the park might not be the best place to begin with? Oh, and btw... Drive her somewhere a bit far away the first times you'll do it in a more public place, that way she'll feel more sure that if someone sees, it's not someone she knows.

Huh, some of the exact advice I was thinking of giving! You give great advice, Ylvie .

I can vouch for easy cover-up in cars...with more minor things, that is...like blow jobs, hand jobs, etc...::blush::

There were also some interesting responses in the "what's the dirtiest way you've masturbated/sex" thread a little while ago, some of which involved sex in public...you might want to check that out. (Sorry I don't have the url code.)

 

[coppertop429]

Re: Why Not . . .

Why hello, MrBates!! How's it goin'?

Walk her thru the parking lot and point out all the other couples in their cars doing the nasty?

Wouldn't that just add to her fears of being seen? It'd emphasize how visible public sex can be.

PS - Nice to see you .

 

[tigra1974]

it might take awhile for her to be comfortable with the whole sex in public thing. just start off in baby steps. that is how my hubby got me into sex in public. all i have to say is that my hubby can confirm that disneyland is the happiest place on earth!!!

she will come around. just give her some space.

 

[PunkGrrl18]

sigh i feel your pain. Lately its been too cold for either of us to walk anywhere (lack of car) and we went to a laundry mat a while ago and there was 2 bathrooms right there it wasnt even crowded...surrounded by marilyn monroe pictures and hes the one who brought it up insiting we go and well fuck in the bathroom , i dont think he realized how horny i was and how willing i am to do it in a public place...he backed out his excuse being "i want to make love for a while, not 5 minutes or if we do it publically lets go to walmart first" what a pussy...!

 

[Bobmi357]

This may be one of those cases of it being a fantasy that turns her on, but she really does not want to turn the fantasy into reality.

We all have them, dirty little fantasys that sound like they may be fun or a major turn on, but for one reason or another would do nothing to make the fantasy into a reality.

It may be that she's turned on by the idea of doing it outdoors, but more turned off by the idea of being seen or getting caught. In which case you need to find one of those "No one is around for miles" places. Or buy a place in the country.

The very first thing I would do is drop the immediate pressure for her to do anything. And forget the reward idea, that was plain stupid. Once you attach rewards to sex, it demeans the whole act, your partner and cheapens the relationship. Instead I'd suggest you try talking to her, find out her views about it, it might be she'd be more willing on a camping trip where there are a lot fewer people, or she might never be interested in really doing it outdoors. It is no big deal if she isn't, if this is just a fantasy that she likes but doesn't want to turn into a reality, its something you need to accept and let it go. You won't die from her lack of interest in screwing on aisle 6 at walmart.

 

[hottwife]

Hm.. Add a reward into it. Tell her sweet things, and give her something she wants in return as well.

I do tell her sweet things all the time . I.E. like how much I love her,what a great body she has {and she does have a great body}, how hot she looks tonigh. you know the normal stuff.
what kind of reward could I give her.??

 

[hottwife]

thanks for all your imput. I think the sit down and talk about it is the best thing to do. if that doesnt work out I will just forget about it and if someday it happens it happens. thank you once again.

 

[MrBates]

Re: Re: Why Not . . .

Why hello, MrBates!! How's it goin'?



Wouldn't that just add to her fears of being seen? It'd emphasize how visible public sex can be.

Well, I was kind of thinking that if she saw that it was not unusual, and that lots of others were doing it, and getting away with it, that she might not be so nervous about it.

But . . . I can certainly see your point.
Was something I hadn't thought of.

But hey, what do you expect? I'm a perv and tend to think like one.

 

[serpentofthefog]

well I can understand the whole not having sex in cars thing. I had sex in the backseat of many a car and I have vowed to never do it again. Some people view having sex in the backseat of a car somewhat cheap. I know I feel that way. Maybe she feels the same, It sounds good in theory, but get down to it and it just seems rather seedy (no offence to anyone! Just my opinion!) Now having sex in a wide open space is another story. Take her somewhere extremely secuded, maybe for a picnic perhaps with some wine. Dont get her drunk, just more relaxed. Then afterwards ask her if she wants a massage, with almost all woman this is a definate yes, I know it is for me. Now that she is relaxed, get her turned on. I know I would like it if my bf would do this for me!

 

[sheath]

what kind of reward could I give her.??

lol

I'm sorry, but that makes her sound like a dog...

I know, I know, you didn't mean it that way at all. But it gave me a chuckle.

S.

 

[Dionysus2003]

thanks for all your imput. I think the sit down and talk about it is the best thing to do. if that doesnt work out I will just forget about it and if someday it happens it happens. thank you once again.

I think you have found the answer here...

Never push someone into things they are not ready for - that will ruin more than it will help.

Talk about it thoroughly with her, if she is not up for it, tell her that is ok, and that she does not have to do it. Take away the pressure of her having to do it. Let the idea grow on her perhaps, by mentioning it while you have sex indoors.

Ask her while you are having sex in a plain spot like the bedroom, how she would feel if you were doing it in the car instead, or in another public place where the risk of being caught is present.

If she likes the idea of that, then you might go further with it - but never ever push her into anything. Many mentioned it already, and I can only agree - it is not a good thing to do.

Don't even think about things like giving her rewards or stuff - the reward should be nothing else but her happiness. And if she is happiest not doing it - then reward her with that That is the only kind of reward that matters

Good luck

 

[RanchHen]

Her "chicking out" at the last minute means she wouldn't mind trying but isn't comfortable enough with the spot. Like another poster said think of a place that is more secluded or one that offers a little more assurance of privacy.