STDs in Erotica - Yes or No?

[Bramblethorn]

I just think that in the stories being written that explore a wealth of sexual adventures that (we hope) engage the readers so that they can enjoy either a good story for a few minutes or a long story for several chapters, the last thing they want to read about is disease, sickness and death, unless it is of course a Horror story.

I just think it's dangerous to generalise about what readers here will and won't accept in stories.

One of my more successful stories here is one where the love interest gets seriously ill from covid, then later develops early-onset dementia and slowly dies from it. It's in the top 250 in Romance, a category which is stereotypically the place for Happy Ever After.

One of the stories ahead of me in that toplist is @MelissaBaby's "Mary and Alvin", which also prominently features illness and death. I'm sure there are others too, that's just the first one that came to mind.

There are readers here who want to spend time in a world where bad things never happen. But there are also readers who want to spend time in a world where people who experience bad things still manage to find joy and meaning and/or great orgasms.

As Chesterton put it, fairytales don't teach children to believe in monsters; they teach children to believe that monsters can be beaten.

 

[Actingup]

OK, I have read quite a lot of erotica on LIT, and have noticed that there very rarely is any mention of people worrying about AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease.

In my stories, I tend to avoid those as if they don't exist. It provides a freedom to write whatever and have my characters not have to worry about dying from some god awful disease.

Am I the only one who does this?

How many people here have seen Les Misérables, the hit musical beloved by millions, based on the extraordinary book beloved by generations? Like many others, I first saw it as a child when our whole family drove to another city for that reason. Here are some lyrics:

[OLD BEGGAR WOMAN]
What you think you're at
Hanging round my pitch?
If you're new around here, girl
You've got a lot to learn
[YOUNG PROSTITUTE]
Listen, you old bat
Crazy bloody witch
Least I give my customers
Some pleasure in return
[OLD BEGGAR WOMAN]
I know what you give
Give 'em all the pox
Spread around your poison
Till they end up in a box
[PIMP]
Leave the poor old cow
Move it, Madeleine
She used to be no better
Till the clap got to her brain

(from 'Look Down')

I think if that if you want to tear down the scrim curtain and have some gritty realism, go for it - we have the example of titanic hit works like this to draw on. But if we want to write a Disney version of sex, we can do that too without judgement.

 

[AWhoopsieDaisy]

If you want it to feel like it's happening in the real and plausible world, a passing concern about stds especially amongst younger characters is honestly pretty relatable and funny.

If your story operates on porn logic or some other state of unreality, it's fair enough to omit STDs. There's no hot bosses to bend over in real life without consequences. So like, fuck it, if HR, common sense, sex education, law or all of the above, don't appear to exist in your story, who's to say STDs aren't a problem either?

I will say though, even if your sandbox of choice has no stds, I'd avoid having anyone go from anal to vaginal without washing off. Even in a world where it has no consequence, that's just gross and I will worry about ecoli flavored UTIs.

 

[MrPixel]

So like, fuck it, if HR, common sense, sex education, law or all of the above, don't appear to exist in your story,

Heh. The VP of HR is doing the president of the company in one story line I've been writing. "Who are you going to report it to, huh? HR?" followed by trailing laughter.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Heh. The VP of HR is doing the president of the company in one story line I've been writing. "Who are you going to report it to, huh? HR?" followed by trailing laughter.

I think I worked at that place once. I don't recommend working at that place.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

I think I worked at that place once. I don't recommend working at that place.

I remember people bitching about the uselessness of HR in a new place I worked. I didn't understand, because the HR rep came by regularly and was proactively productive for any issues our department had.

Yes, the HR rep was having an affair with the director of my department. As soon as I moved to a new department, I found HR useless, too.

 

[StillStunned]

I remember people bitching about the uselessness of HR in a new place I worked. I didn't understand, because the HR rep came by regularly and was proactively productive for any issues our department had.

Yes, the HR rep was having an affair with the director of my department. As soon as I moved to a new department, I found HR useless, too.

The moral of this tale, as I see it, is to give HR someone to screw so they don't screw you.

 

[OffNSFW]

OK, I have read quite a lot of erotica on LIT, and have noticed that there very rarely is any mention of people worrying about AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease.

In my stories, I tend to avoid those as if they don't exist. It provides a freedom to write whatever and have my characters not have to worry about dying from some god awful disease.

Am I the only one who does this?

I don't really get into pregnancies/STIs, but I do try to portray the more practical concerns of sex, like birth control and lube, in a realistic way. Those things are part of people's everyday sex lives. I think you can tap into those experiences by eroticizing those details.

 

[Codoc24]

I always ignore unwanted pregnancies and STDs unless it is something that helps the story along. Just like in real life, stopping to open a fucking impossible-to-open package for a condom and putting it on is kind of a mood killer. Or in the winter grabbing a tube of ice-cold lube.

 

[roseyfingers]

I never ignore those issues but, as to STDs, make up reasons why it isn't a problem. Pregnancy is something I use as part of the sexual submission as because I think it's actually erotic.

 

[WittyUserName]

OK, I have read quite a lot of erotica on LIT, and have noticed that there very rarely is any mention of people worrying about AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease.

In my stories, I tend to avoid those as if they don't exist. It provides a freedom to write whatever and have my characters not have to worry about dying from some god awful disease.

Am I the only one who does this?

I am on the side of wanting to enjoy the fantasy. Real life is a pain in the ass, why not escape some of the things that suck about it? I state in my author notes that I write in a world without STI's. It's fantasy. I can understand wanting to be as realistic as possible, but that's not for me. I do acknowledge the risk of pregnancy, since it would be quite the fantasy world if sex DIDN'T make babies. My solution was to add an extra effective birth control pill in my universe. The pill also stops menstruation completely, so I don't have to track a dozen women's cycles.

Do what's best for your story. You can't please everybody, so don't bother trying. I don't like reading about condoms, others think it's unrealistic not to.

 

[Lifestyle66]

In my latest story "Cheated Wives' Club", I use the threat of STDs, condoms, and unplanned pregnancy as part of the story world-building. The guy asks what it would take to forego condoms, and she explains the conditions. At one point, I even have him slipping out of her, leaving the condom inside her.

Real life can also be exciting.

 

[AprilTwenties]

I've wrote about them, boo, throughout my stories. Some more blatant than in others, granted, but it's there.

A x

 

[OffNSFW]

This thread isn't dead; it just smells funny.

I've never included STIs or pregnancy in any of my stories, but I frequently include condoms, dental dams, gloves, and, on one or two occasions, the morning after pill. A fictional universe where safer sex procedures exist kind of implies that STIs or pregnancy could happen. For me, though, it's more about the eroticism of watching your partner put the condom on, or changing gloves in the middle of group sex. There's a ritual to it, a scent, a feeling. It's a way to bring the sensory experience of real life sex to the reader.

If you want to know which feature of real life my stories will utterly disavow except when it's an active part of the scene, it's the cell phone.