T-shirt sayings

[Todd]

"Filthy Stinking Rich... Well, Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad"

"I Used Up All My Sick Days... So I Called In Dead"

"Husband And Cat Lost... Reward For Cat"

"Happiness Is Seeing Your Mother-In-Law On A Milk Carton"

"Just Give Me Chocolate And Nobody Gets Hurt"

"Learn From Your Parents' Mistakes... Use Birth Control"

"If God Had Wanted Me To Touch My Toes, He Would Have Put Them On My Knees"

"If You Can Read This... Kiss A Teecher"

"Wrinkled Was Not One Of The Things I Wanted To Be When I Grew Up"

"If You Remember The '60s, You Weren't Really There"

"Procrastinate Now"

"Rehab Is For Quitters"

"My Husband And I Married For Better Or Worse... ....He Couldn't Do Better And I Couldn't Do Worse"

"The More I Learn About Women, The More I Love My Harley"

 

[Blackbich]

Some of these I've seen before but they're still cute.

I've also seen...

'Frankly scallop, I don't give a clam' (somewhere on the east coast)

'Please don't make me kill you'

'I can go from zero to bitch in .0006 seconds'

'2:00 am, party, my crib' (on a baby's tee shirt)

 

[Weird Harold]

I want one like my daughter's.

It says, "I do what the voices in my head tell me to."

 

[Madame Pandora]

I have one nerve left – and you’re on it!

Does anal retentive have a hyphen?

Bad spellers of the world UNTIE!

&…my favorite…

I thought I wanted a career – it turns out I just wanted paychecks!

 

[CreamyLady]

Dogs have owners; cats have staff.

Does not play well with others.

Runs with scissors. (I have that one.)

When I have a little money, I buy books; if there is any left, I buy food. (I have that one, too.)

 

[bluntforcemama]

"It's not pretty being easy."

 

[Mistress]

Umm heres a few I own:

I'd do what the voices tell me to but I dont speak their language

I'm not a slut, I'm just poplar!

I'm smiling because they havent found the bodies yet!

Hey your village called, they're missing their idiot!

Got a purple t-shirt that has very small writing above the left breast, when you lean in to read it, it says: Fucking nosy arent you?

got a few otehrs but too damn lazy to gothrough my closet to see what they say! lol

 

[Xander]

Got this T-shirt from my former Boss

"I am not paid enough to be nice to you!!"

 

[Dillinger]

Nuke the gay whales

Nice computers don't go down

Do not adjust your mind, its reality that is malfunctioning

If voting could change the system it would be illegal

Jehoval is an alien and still threatens this planet

If Goddess didn't want us to lick dick, why did she make it so much like a popsicle?

If God didn't want us to eat pussy, why did he make it look so much like a taco?

There is no complete theory of anything

No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

Entropy requires no maintenance

U.S. out of North America now!

Defend yourselves! The government is taking over our country!

Yog Sothoth Neblod Zin

Whoever dies with the most toys wins

Existence and nonexistence are the same

Campus Crusade for Cthulhu

Tis an ill wind that blows no minds

Reality is what you can get away with

 

[Tabby432]

"Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups"

 

[Beebeeblue]

Youve been a bad boy...go to my room!

 

[Isolde]

I own one that says:

Just because I'm moody doesnt mean you're not irritating.

And my dad has a few:

I'm the leader...which way did they go.

My next wife will be normal.

And one all of us kids pitched in to get him~My ex-wife's other car is a broom.

 

[Silverlily]

Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.

Gee Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.

If I look like I care, take my temperature.

Turn over the shoes or the little dog gets it - the Witch.

My mother has this one - (a picture of an old lady vacuuming leaves in her front yard) One very neat grandma.

 

[LittleRedDevil]

"I hear voices and they don't like you"

"I can only be nice to one person a day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow doesn't look good either."

"Can't sleep, clowns will eat me..."

"Spear Britney"

"Boy-Band reject"

 

[Mistress]

Lol, forgot this one, I have a tendency to get lost easy so a friend gave me this one:

HAVE YOU SEEN ME? If so please report my where abouts immediately.

 

[batter]

t-shirt sayings

my t-shirts have the following on them:

LICK ME TILL I SCREAM and my favorite one:

I LIKE MY SEX LIKE I LIKE MY COFFEE...HOT, STRONG, AND ON THE KITCHEN TABLE.

i am always on the lookout for different t-shirts




[Edited by batter on 03-20-2001 at 02:26 PM]

 

[Shelby]

If I can't win...then I don't want to play.

This is not Burger King. You do not get it your way. You get it my way or you don't fucking get it at all.

(FORD logo is huge) Friends don't let friends drive Chevys.

 

[scylis]

"i used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now..." in squigly letters

the bright inmate orange "PSYCH WARD: 24-7-666" (my official second lucky shirt, in honor of my best friend)

my black one with "BOMB SQUAD" in small print on the left front breast, and "BOMB TECHNITIAN: If you see me running, try and keep up." on the back..

and i have a gaggle of Nine Inch Nails t-shirts, one of which is my official first lucky shirt.. as to why it's lucky, it has to do with my third half cousin (or something like that) and the last family reunion i went to (no, not THAT kind of "lucky")

 

[cherrypop]

Wonder if I was the inspiration, here............*g*

"I'm not a bitch..I'm the bitch! And it's miss bitch to you!"

Hehehe..gotta love it! Ciao!

 

[SweetCherry]

A pic of a female cop with a gun that reads....
"I have PMS and a gun. DO you really feel that lucky?"

My mom had one years ago that read..
"Jesus is coming, and is he PISSED!"
I always got a laugh out of it when she'd wear it.

 

[Silverlily]

my black one with "BOMB SQUAD" in small print on the left front breast, and "BOMB TECHNITIAN: If you see me running, try and keep up." on the back..

That reminds me of one I got in the military. It has a picture of a Rockeye GP bomb on the front and says "Penetration before detonation".

 

[Weird Harold]

How about all the poor children forced to wear T-shirts that say:

My grandma went to Las Vegas and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt!

Substitute Grandma for any relative, and Las Vegas for just about any tourist trap, and the numbers of embarassed children rises into numbers unimaginable.

 

[Flagg]

Viagra is for pussies

 

[SoftPeaches]

Man made beer
God made pot
Who do you trust?

 

[Ally C]

I saw a t-shirt complete with the Coca-Cola colours and logos, except on closer inspection I noticed that it said "Enjoy Cock" instead of "Enjoy Coke".